the chair

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Strong Bad Email #162
watch 4 branches what I want
"Whoa, it's been upgraded to Stank..."

Strong Bad decides to get a new chair. Bubs offers some suggestions.

Cast (in order of appearance): Strong Bad, Stooly, Bubs, Lil' Strong Bad, Homestar Runner Chair, Strong Sad (Easter egg)

Places: Computer Room, Bubs' Concession Stand, Strong Sad's Room (Easter egg)

Computer: Lappy 486

Date: Monday, December 4, 2006

Running Time: 3:58

Page Title: Lappy 486

DVD: strongbad_email.exe Disc Six

Contents

[edit] Transcript

STRONG BAD: {singing} A-just scrape some email off the top, and I'll help you out toniiiight!

{pronounces "D to the ear" as "Duh to the ear", "doesnt" as "dohs-n-t" (with extra emphasis at the end of the word), and "truely" as "treh-leh", and reads "Keith, PA" as "Keith and Pa"}

STRONG BAD: Ooh! It's a father-son email picnic! {typing} Y to the ou {pronounced "Yeah to the oo"} don't know what you're talkin' about, Pakeithpsy. Stooly here is a tush-cheek's dream. So cottony squish and pillowy fresh. {Zoom out to show Strong Bad leaping off of the stool.} Take a look-see!

{Zoom in to the seat, which is filthy and has the word "STANK" seeping out of it at various spots.}

STRONG BAD: Whoa, it's been upgraded to Stank...

{A face fades onto the seat of the stool and coughs.}

STRONG BAD: Eeew... Maybe it is time for a re-imagining of my email-checkin' chair...

STOOLY: {coughs again} I just need a lozenge...

{Cut to Strong Bad standing outside Bubs' Concession Stand, with the camera centered behind Bubs.}

STRONG BAD: Hey, Bubs!

BUBS: Hey, customer!

STRONG BAD: What do you got in the way of things I can sit on whilst I check emails?

{cut to the front of the concession stand}

BUBS: Ooh! Lucky for you! I just got {places a box on the counter} this pre-owned box of chicken beaks in just now! Like right just now!

STRONG BAD: Okay. Okay. Okay... But, you got anything less anthrax-y?

BUBS: I got this old Winger album! {holds up the record case}

{cut to Strong Bad}

STRONG BAD: Well, yeah... that is less Anthrax-y. But I was kinda hoping for a chair of some kind.

{cut to Bubs}

BUBS: Step right into my showroom!

{Bubs slides away to his right. Cut to the side of Bubs' Concession Stand. As Strong Bad walks around, a portion of the wall falls outward, revealing a conveyor belt. Bubs rides on it standing on one foot.}

BUBS: Zzzzziiiiiiiip! {jumps off conveyor belt} All right! We'll start at the tip, and work our way to the tup!

STRONG BAD: You make less sense every day, Bubsy.

BUBS: Crabadonk!

{The wall flips back up, then falls down again, revealing a red, white and blue bicycle seat on the conveyor belt.}

STRONG BAD: Hey, that's no chair! {zoom in on the seat} That's Red, White, and Banana! My old bicycle seat!

{Cut to a film-projected scene of Li'l Strong Bad riding the bicycle seat outside a porch.}

STRONG BAD: I used to ride that thing on my paper route all the time!

{Li'l Strong Bad lights a newspaper on fire with a Duplo lighter and throws it at the house. As it bounces off the door, the door begins to emit smoke, and Li'l Strong Bad laughs. Cut back to Strong Bad and Bubs.}

STRONG BAD: No, I'd better pass on that. I had a few too many wipeouts on that thing as a kid.

BUBS: Ugh! You nasty!

STRONG BAD: What?

{The wall rises again, and falls down with a chair shaped like Homestar Runner on it}

STRONG BAD: What makes you think I want to check-a my email on a Homestar Runner-shaped chair?

BUBS: Aw, come on. Give it a try!

{Strong Bad jumps onto the chair}

HOMESTAR RUNNER CHAIR: Ow.

STRONG BAD: {jumping out of the chair} Wah!

BUBS: Whoops, seen enough of that one!

{The wall rises and falls with a deformed gray lump vaguely resembling a chair.}

STRONG BAD: Aww, your snowman died.

BUBS: {cut to closeup of Bubs} You simpleton! This is a Denoob Largo original!

{Cut to the chair. A Styleron Ecochair logo appears.}

BUBS: The Styleron Ecochair!

STRONG BAD: {pan up to Strong Bad} Look, I don't care how Swedish your chair is. I have no need for a giant {pan back to the chair} albino doggie-doody.

BUBS: {cut to Bubs} Always a hit at parties...

STRONG BAD: {cut back to Strong Bad} Come on, Bubs! Don't you have anything more... executive? A chair that will intimidate my underlings and eliminate my overlings!

BUBS: Ooh! {Cut back to the wide shot of Strong Bad and Bubs, the wall is already up.} Lucky for you! I just got this pre-owned—

{The wall falls, displaying the same box of chicken beaks seen earlier.}

STRONG BAD: {interrupting} NOT {The conveyor belt immediately rises.} a box of chicken beaks!

BUBS: Oh. Then behold!

{The conveyor belt falls again, revealing a large leather chair, which obscures Strong Bad as it rolls out. The chair glows and a chorus sounds briefly, and a golden "Le Restige" plaque appears.}

BUBS: Le Restige! {He pronounces "le" as "leh"}

STRONG BAD: {appears from behind the chair} Style and class! Oh, tell me that leather's Corinthian! Just tell me it's Corinthian!

BUBS: {cut to closeup of Bubs} Crabadonk!

{Cut to a closeup of Strong Bad, who is now sitting on the chair.}

STRONG BAD: So what kind of options are we looking at on this baby?

BUBS: Ooh! You're gonna love this!

{Bubs opens a compartment in the arm rest to reveal a red button and presses it, making a buzzing sound. A pair of metallic arms appear from behind Strong Bad and quickly slip a pair of gray sweatpants on him}

STRONG BAD: No way! A sweatpants button! And so begins my meteoric rise to the top of the corporate ladder... Now alls we gotta do is see how well it checks emails!

{Cut back to the computer room, with Le Restige taking up nearly the entire screen}

STRONG BAD: {singing} Hey, hey, hey. It's email.

{opens an email which is almost completely obscured by the chair}

STRONG BAD: {reading email} Dear Strong Bad, how come you never take your mask off? {typing} Like I've said before, this is not a mask. It's my face. But hey, I'll give it a shot!

{Strong Bad tugs on his mask until it comes off, and ripping fabric is heard as he does this. He raises the mask above the chair and screams for a few seconds, then puts it back on again, making gurgling noises throughout.}

STRONG BAD: Ugh! I am NEVER gonna do that again! And, here's a picture of my parents. {holds up a photo; only the corner is visible above the chair.}

{Cut to a wide shot of the computer room.}

STRONG BAD: And now time to unwind with a pair of executive sweatpants!

{Strong Bad opens the compartment in the same arm rest and pushes the sweatpants button, making the buzzing sound again. The robotic arms go haywire and begin piling sweatpants onto him}

STRONG BAD: Hey, What's going on here?!! Uh!!! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!

{Strong Bad is tossed into the air. He falls down with several layered sweatpants on his legs and another pair on his head.}

STRONG BAD: {groaning} Ooooh... so... many... sweatpants... I can't feel my parts...

{The Paper comes down.}

[edit] Easter Eggs

nice try dodongo!
  • Click on the Styleron logo while Bubs displays the ecochair to see a poster of the designer.
  • At the end, click on Le Restige to see a scene of Strong Sad trying to sit on the ecochair.
{Cut to Strong Sad's room. Strong Sad is balancing awkwardly atop the ecochair. The poster for it is on the wall behind him.}
STRONG SAD: {Tips back and forth} Whoa... whoa... whoa... whoa... {Falls backwards, appearing to break his back} Ooh! ... I can't feel my parts...
  • The photo of Strong Bad's parents, when viewed in a decompiler, is blank except for the words "nice try dodongo!" written across it.

[edit] Fun Facts

[edit] Explanations

  • A lozenge is a small medicated candy intended to be dissolved slowly in order to soothe an irritated throat.
  • "What does Strong Bad look like without his mask?" and "What do the parents of the characters look like?" are two commonly submitted questions that The Brothers Chaps have stated that they are not likely ever to answer seriously.

[edit] Trivia

...when viewed with a decompiler
  • This is another instance of Strong Bad checking more than one email.
  • The Floppy Disk Container reads "bio forge".
  • Strong Bad's face/mask is facing the viewers even though Strong Bad is presumably facing his computer. This can be partially viewed when using a Flash decompiler.
  • This email marks the first appearance of a more realistic-looking sky over The Field.
  • The text of the obscured email reads:
  • When Strong Bad pulls Le Restige up to the Lappy, it makes the Geddup Noise.

[edit] Remarks

[edit] Goofs

  • When Lil' Strong Bad throws the burning newspaper at the house, the non-burning end of the newspaper hits the house and bounces off so that the burning part never touches the house, yet the house catches fire anyway.
  • The conveyor belt is not seen or heard going back up again after the Styleron Ecochair is seen for the last time. Nevertheless, the conveyor belt is up when Bubs brings out the chicken beaks a second time.
  • When the scene switches to a wide shot after Strong Bad holds up the picture of his parents, the text on the screen has immediately switched from the email he received to the text Strong Bad typed.

[edit] Inside References

[edit] Real-World References

[edit] Fast Forward

[edit] DVD Version

  • The DVD version features hidden creators' commentary. To access it, switch your DVD player's audio language selection while watching.
  • The Dodongo easter egg is not viewable.

[edit] Commentary Transcript

(Commentary by: Mike Chapman, Matt Chapman)

MIKE: "The chair," I call this one.

MATT: Whaaat should I scrape email off the top of, Strong Bad?

MIKE: Uhhh, like if you're making some tomato soup, maybe?

MATT: Ohhh!

MIKE: It cools a little bit.

MATT: I feel like it's, like, uh...the top of a cake.

MIKE: Oh.

MATT: When it's kind of rounded and you want it to be a flat-top,—

MIKE: Oh.

MATT: — so you have to scrape that off?

MIKE: I was thinkin' about the skin on some tomato soup.—

MATT: Oooh!

MIKE: —The skin that forms?

MATT: That Masala tea I get at Zyco,—

MIKE: Yeah.

MATT: —the taste, this Indian restaurant, has a nice skin on it.

MIKE: Mmhmm.

MATT: {pause until Strong Bad jumps off of the stool} Uhh...whoa. I am sitting on the stool that—

MIKE: {overlapping} It's true!

MATT: —well, I guess that's—this isn't based...this stool is not what that stool is based on, but this stool {Mike begins to say something, but stops} happened after the fact, but it looks pretty dang much like it.

MIKE: Yellow cushion.

MATT: Yeah.

MIKE: {overlapping} Wooden stool.

MATT: A rare...{cuts himself off}

MIKE: So, uhm, let's try to give some actual insight into this email, and—

MATT: {interrupting} I just did, man!

MIKE: —the process of us making it.

MATT: I'm sitting on a stool with—

MIKE: {overlapping} Oh, that's right!

MATT: —chicken beaks. Ethical chick'n beaks.

{Mike laughs}

MATT: Um...you made a nice uh, version, of the {both laughing} cover of Winger's first album there, Mike!

MIKE: {singing} She's only seventeen...

MATT: Uh-huh, Uh-huh.

MIKE: Name one more song from—

MATT: {covering him up, singing loudly} Madalaine, ahh-ah ahh ahh...

MIKE: {under the previous line, quietly} that album...Wow! Nice! I don't think I was—

MATT: {still singing} Is this love too tough to taaake?

MIKE: Impressive.

MATT: {overlapping} Remember I showed, uh, John Raydle's brother Jeff, uh, that video—I had recorded that video?

MIKE: Uh-huh?

MATT: ...and he came over to do somethin', I think we were all going to a Braves game? And I showed it to him and he kinda, he kinda laughed at it. {Mike laughs aloud} Thought that his— Kip Winger's spin moves were pretty hilarious. {Mike chuckles} Uh, just then I—I remember having a good time making the Welcome Back Kotter-sounding little song that plays—

MIKE: {underneath} Uh-huh.

MATT: — when Strong Bad has his old paper route. {short pause} {referring to the Homestar Runner chair} That looks like some kind of chair that they would sell at Ikea.

MIKE: I would like that chair.

{Another short pause}

MATT: You think Bubs dipped Homestar in hot sugar, maybe? {Mike laughs} That one?

MIKE: Hot sugar, yeah.

MATT: He looks kinda like The Cheat did when they glazed him with those donuts.

MIKE: Those...Schlembaugh's Donuts?

MATT: {referring to the Styleron Ecochair} That thing just looks like a lump of hot sugar. Or melted. Now it's cooled.

MIKE: So what are you getting at? Do you think Bubs has some sort of hot sugar operation, {Matt laughs} Matt?

MATT: Think that's what's in the secret {Mike stifles laughter} basement of Bubs' Concession Stand is a big vat of hot sugar...and simple syrup. He likes to dip things in it.

{Pause until Strong Bad refuses the Chick'n Beaks for a second time. Mike laughs.}

MIKE: Too the—

MATT: Awww.

MATT: Uhhh... Ooh. Style and class! Did we originally make that for those promos in recor— in independent record stores?

MIKE: I think so, although I think it was based on a chair that he's sitting on in the Fhqwhgads video?

MATT: Oh, that's right. A badly drawn chair.

MIKE: {overlapping} A badly drawn chair, and I think I...made a better version of just like a maroon...—

MATT: Yeah.

MIKE: —what do you call that kind of chair? Is that a wingback chair?

MATT: Yeah, it looks like it might be. {short pause} The sweatpants button looks like, uh...some kind of Wallace & Gromit invention. {both laugh} Any...thing with robot hands that have Mickey Mouse gloves on them? {both laugh} It should be playing that music, {begins imitating bass intro to Wallace & Gromit invention theme} Dun dun dun dun, dun dun dun dun...{continues}

MIKE: {begins melody} Dun da da, daladdle-un dun dun... {Matt laughs} dun da da...{trails off}

MATT: Mike, what happens if you broke apart the .swf {pronounces as "swiff"} here and looked at...

MIKE: Uh...

MATT: ...the picture of his family?

MIKE: Well, there's a—

MATT: {underneath} err, his parents?

MIKE: —Polaroid that says "Nice try dodongo!"

MATT: And who is Dodongo, Mike?

MIKE: {underneath} Dodongo is— Dodongo's an enemy from Zelda, and I can't— is he a lizard, some kinda lizard-lookin' thing?

MATT: He was like a dinosaur.

MIKE: {overlapping} A dinosaur thing?

MATT: Yeah. And you always have to throw bombs in his mouth.

MIKE: Dodongo...yeah, that's right.

MATT: {in reference the floppy disk container} BioForge. That's a good game.

MIKE: {chuckles slightly; pause until Strong Bad has been thrown out of Le Restige by the sweatpants button} Look at— {short pause} Hey, how's his arm coming out of {Matt notices and laughs} the back of the sweatpants?

MATT: {amused} I dunno, maybe it's—

MIKE: {overlapping} He's just got holes cut in the back. {mumbling nonsense as the paper comes down} Agadagadaga!

[edit] Fun Facts

  • Welcome Back, Kotter was an American television sitcom about Gabe Kotter, a wise-cracking teacher at James Buchanan High in Brooklyn to teach an often unruly group of remedial wiseguys known as the Sweathogs.
  • Wallace & Gromit are the main characters in a series of films by Nick Park of Aardman Animations. Wallace is an eccentric inventor and Gromit is his companion and dog. Gromit appears to be a lot more intelligent than his master.

[edit] External Links

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