The House That Gave Sucky Tricks
From Homestar Runner Wiki
Toon Category: Holiday Toon
Homestar's haunted house inspires Strong Bad to yell a lot.
Cast (in order of appearance): Strong Mad, Strong Bad, The Cheat, Homestar Runner, The Rocoulm, Marzipan, King of Town, Poopsmith, Homsar, The Knight, Strong Sad, The Ugly One, Coach Z, Bubs, Cheerleader, The Sad Kids, Pom Pom
Date: Thursday, October 29, 2015
Running Time: 5:30 (TV Time Toons Menu), 8:12 (YouTube)
Contents |
Transcript
Transcript
STRONG MAD: This Halloween's not working!
STRONG BAD: Boy, you said it Strong Mad. This is the lamest haunted house ever. My pants haven't entertained the thought of peeing themselves even once.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Scary shoes!
STRONG BAD: Really? Spooky shoes?
HOMESTAR RUNNER: No, no. Scary shoes. Spooky shoes are the next room.
STRONG BAD: Homestar, your haunted house is even worse than normal this year. You ever think of using any actual Halloween decorations?
HOMESTAR RUNNER: No, Marzipan only let me use stuff from the goodwill donations pile. Incomplete jigsaw puzzle!
THE CHEAT: Meh!
STRONG BAD: This place is a disgrace to haunted houses, haunted hovels, haunted timeshares, and haunted extended stay motels even. Why, if I had a haunted house, I think it would turn out a little something... like the following cartoon!
STRONG BAD: Welcome to St. Cadaverstump's totally not just an old furniture warehouse morgue-tuary!
ANNOUNCER: Open weeknights in October. Located just off I-20.
STRONG BAD: The first room would come out swingin', with everybody's favorite jibblies painting, The Jibblies Painting!
THE JIBBLIES PAINTING: Come on in here!
STRONG BAD: Yeah, yeah. We've all heard that before. But in order to take it to the next level, my haunted house would have a horrible painting of... somebody's dad!
SOMEBODY'S DAD PAINTING: Uh, hey, hey, hey, hey. Well, come on in here!
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Why is he wearing cycling gear? He's not even that serious about riding!
SOMEBODY'S DAD PAINTING: Hey, I can do a 220 in 4:45.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Ahhh!
STRONG BAD: Then there would be... the gross out room. But instead of severed limbs and surgeries gone wrong...
MARZIPAN: Ahhh!
STRONG BAD: It's just a silent white room filled with pure stench. And, oh, ho, ho. What a stench it is! Let me lay it on you like a movie trailer.
STRONG BAD: Strong Mad! Oyster! Smoothie! Breath! Caked! Armpit! Latte!
MARZIPAN: Strong Bad, you know the words in that sequence are illegal. Arrest him King of Town!
KING OF TOWN: Keep piling up that smell poopsmith! Wait, I can arrest people?
MARZIPAN: I think so, I mean you're allowed to execute people, right?
KING OF TOWN: Do the words 'doo hoo hoo' mean anything to you?
HOMSAR: Ahhh! This has been a supreme fish delight!
STRONG BAD: Ooh! There'd also be one of those immersive horror experience rooms that are so popular these days
STRONG SAD: OK. Gotta logic this out. Open a vault before time runs out. Skeleton's pointing at a clue. Am I on the right track?
STRONG BAD: Now, just reach in the toilet. I just want you to reach in the toilet.
STRONG SAD: It's pointing at the toilet.
STRONG BAD: It's full of poop.
STRONG SAD: But that's just misdirection.
STRONG BAD: I just want you to touch the poop.
STRONG SAD: They want me to think I should reach in the toilet.
STRONG BAD: No! I do want you to reach in the toilet! That is all that I want you to do!
STRONG SAD: It's too easy.
STRONG BAD: Touch the poop!
STRONG SAD: But I know better!
STRONG BAD: Touch the freakin' poop!
STRONG BAD: Most horror stuff is pretty obvious. Like, of course it's terrifying to get disemjowel'd with a lunatic with a machete.
STRONG SAD: Machété!
STRONG BAD: Shut up! But I think people are ready for the more subtle terror of... Two star bed and breakfast!
COACH Z: It's somehow worse than if it only got one star!
BUBS: Dry scrambled eggs? Questionable hairs on the antimacassar?
STRONG SAD: Antimacassar!
BUBS: Shut up!
COACH Z: Failed terlet paper rose! What kind of inhuman monsters would run a place like this?
SHUT UP LADY: Oh, it's so charming!
COACH Z AND BUBS: Shut up, lady!
STRONG BAD: Nowadays, everybody's tired of the same old evil clowns, undead cheerleaders, and all those bloody-eyed found footage children.
THE SAD GIRL: Nine.
THE SAD BOY: Sequels.
STRONG BAD: But for my haunted house, I will unleash an entirely new horror icon! Say hello to the new face of terror! Large bean!
STRONG BAD: Come on, anybody? Don't you think that Large Bean is unsettling?
HOMESTAR RUNNER: And next on our tour, if you'll all please gather around. Fill in all available space please. We have a prime specimen of large bean.
STRONG BAD: Wait. What, what the crap is this?
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Other varieties include, small bean.
STRONG BAD: Stop it!
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Extra large bean.
STRONG BAD: This is not a science museum!
HOMESTAR RUNNER: And, of course my favorite... teenie weenie beanie.
STRONG BAD: You do not call large bean 'teenie weenie beanie'!
STRONG SAD: I sure hope they sell large bean plush dolls in the museum gift shop!
HOMESTAR RUNNER: I think you might be pleasantly surprised, young scholar!
STRONG BAD: Shut up! Large bean will eat your soul! He'll eat all your souls!
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Wow Strong Bad, the spooky shoes room really effected you this year, huh?
STRONG BAD: I thought this was the scary shoes room?
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Oh, right. Close your eyes.
STRONG BAD: Um... OK.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Open 'em. You're in the spooky shoes room now.
STRONG BAD: Uh. You were right Strong Mad. This Halloween's not working.
NARRATOR: When nights are chill and filled with doom, again will rise the cursed legume. So if you're out on Hallowe'en, beware the wrath of Largest Bean! Ah ha ha ha!
STRONG BAD: See? This guy respects Large Bean.
NARRATOR: I'm sorry Strong Bad. I... I can't get behind Large Bean.
Fun Facts
Trivia
- The name of this toon is based on The House That Gave Sucky Treats, and a pun on the phrase, 'Trick or treat'
- This the first Halloween toon Homsar appears without activating an Easter egg.
Inside References
Real-World References
- Goodwill Industries is a American nonprofit organization.
- Michael Jackson was a musician, known as the "King of Pop". Marizpan's mention of her dressing up as Prince connects towards Jackson, as they were rivals in the eighties.
