redesign

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Current revision as of 04:37, 10 February 2024

"You clearly don't have what it takes to bring NO LOAFING to the digital age."

Strong Bad considers redesigning the "No Loafing" sign and painting his computer room.

Cast (in order of appearance): Strong Bad, The Cheat, Strong Mad (voice only), Coach Z

Places: Computer Room, The Cheat's Computer Room, Laundry Room of the Brothers Strong

Computer: Lappy 486

Date: Monday, July 10, 2006

Running Time: 3:46

Page Title: Lappy 486

DVD: strongbad_email.exe Disc Five

[edit] Transcript

{The scene opens in a darkened Computer Room with yellow tape (reading "LELLOWTAPE") all over the Lappy.}

STRONG BAD: {from offscreen} Email is nice, {the lights come on and Strong Bad sits down} habalubabulabada! {rips the tape away} Email is twice, habilastilbilasaw! {pulls up the email}

subject: keeping life exciting

dear strong bad,
dude i am getting bored of the "no loafing" sign and blue
paint.

jamie ericson canada

{The "dear strong bad" echoes, causing Strong Bad to look around a bit. Strong Bad pronounces "jamie ericson" as "hom-ee-ay eric-SON".}

STRONG BAD: {typing} That's so funny that you should say that Jamie {says as an unintelligible mumble}, because I was just thinking how bored I am with your butt, and your face, and your snotty nose.

{"nose" echoes, and Strong Bad looks around some more. Strong Bad clears the screen.}

STRONG BAD: {typing} I guess the No Loafing sign could take a cue from the fast-food, soft drink, and bad sports team industries and combat sluggish sales and decades of losing with a slick logo redesign.

{The screen cuts back and then zooms to the No Loafing sign. The blue wall vanishes.}

STRONG BAD: {rapping to a beat} First you squish it, skew it, and turn it all around. Squish it, skew it, turn it all around.

{As he says this, the border disappears and the words are squished, skewed, and turned around. At the end, the words are at a slant.}

STRONG BAD: Then we need to make it fast and slick and shiny like Flo Jo in a tuxedo.

{The words curve, the tops of the letters become spikes pointing to the left, and they become all shiny.}

STRONG BAD: {rapping again} Uh! Flo Jo with da tux-eee-do!

{The words react to the beat of his rap, various decorations litter the screen, and a no symbol appears behind the words.}

STRONG BAD: Now it's time to play Color Wheel Roulette. No Whammies, no Whammies!

{The colors of the sign cycle through various schemes, finally ending up on the words being a dull yellow and the circle in the background turning a greenish tan, with the blank space in the middle turning brown.}

STRONG BAD: {audience groans} Awww... Ouch, man. Now, just when you think you're done, you gotta dip it in molten Plexiglas {the entire sign becomes glossy} to give it that "children under three are sure to choke on it" goodness.

{With a "ding", sparkles appear on the logo.}

STRONG BAD: Oh, wait. Almost forgot the fangs.

{With a roar, bloody fangs sprout from the logo.}

{Cut to The Cheat and Strong Bad, with a new-style iMac in front of The Cheat. The logo Strong Bad described is on the monitor.}

THE CHEAT: {The Cheat noises}

STRONG BAD: Well, I don't know how we're gonna print it out, seeing as how somebody sliced off the back of your monitor. And quit rubbing that plastic bar of soap {indicating The Cheat's cordless mouse} on the desk. You clearly don't have what it takes {rubs The Cheat's head} to bring NO LOAFING into the digital age.

{The Cheat closes the window, and Strong Bad turns toward the viewer, smiling.}

STRONG BAD: But I does!

{Cut back to the No Loafing sign.}

STRONG BAD: Fresh from elementary school cafetoriums and lotto machines...

{The No Loafing sign transforms into a cafeteria-style LED display.}

STRONG BAD: ...comes one of those actually pretty hard-to-read message board signs.

{"NO LOAFING" scrolls past, followed by a crawling worm.}

STRONG BAD: Capable of advanced animation, scroll-a botones...

{The words "GRUEL IS COOL!" come in, with the individual pixels coming from opposite sides before meeting.}

STRONG BAD: ...and twelve levels of blinkiness.

{"NO LOAFING" returns and the letters blink. Then the screen blinks and fireworks appear on the display.}

STRONG BAD: Now we can celebrate the lack of loafing with some fireworks! And a man doing cartwheels!

{The fireworks disappear and a man doing cartwheels moves across the display. Cut to Strong Bad.}

STRONG BAD: No mortal would dare loaf under the four-colored dotted digital stare of this bad boy! Y'know, unless they looked up too late, and the "No" had already scrolled off...

{Scrolls up to the display just as the "N" in "NO LOAFING" scrolls off.}

STRONG BAD: ...so they thought that it said, "DO Loafing."

{The words "DO LOAFING" scroll on.}

STRONG BAD: Or maybe, like, Franklin Delano Loafing, our nation's laziest president.

{The man doing cartwheels appears after "DO LOAFING", followed by "FRANKL" before the screen cuts back to Strong Bad's Lappy.}

STRONG BAD: {typing} That's enough loaf. As for the blue wall, if you're gonna repaint anything, you might as well use that magic green screen paint that Hollywood still thinks looks good. Then the wall can be anything you want!

{Cut to Strong Bad's computer room, but with bright green walls instead of blue. Strong Bad happily skips in the middle of the screen.}

STRONG BAD: {voiceover} Imagine being able to frolic through the bread aisle...

{The wall — and Strong Bad's bright green eyes — are replaced with an image of a bread aisle at a supermarket.}

STRONG BAD: {voiceover} ...without leaving the house!

{Strong Bad leans back against the wall and sinks into the sitting position.}

STRONG BAD: Oh, bread aisle! Warm me with your enriched, bleached bosom! And please, give me back my sight.

{Cut to another part of the computer room with the same green paint. Strong Bad is sitting on the floor, looking at the wall, and holding a controller.}

STRONG BAD: {voiceover} Or play your favorite video games where the pixels are big as hams!

{The wall becomes a video game called "Sundae Drivin'", which involves a giant bowl of ice cream on wheels driving down the road collecting toppings.}

STRONG BAD: {imitating a car's engine} Vrrrrrrrr! Vrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!

{The sundae-car collects a cherry, and "CHERRY GET" appears on the top of the screen.}

STRONG BAD: Vrrrrrrrrrr! Watch out for the wet walnuts!

{The sundae-car collides with a brown jar with a "W" on it and it explodes.}

STRONG BAD: Awwwwwww!

{The screen reads "Your James Over", with a cherry under it.}

STRONG BAD: This game sucks.

STRONG BAD: {voiceover} But what green screens are really for...

{The screen cuts to Strong Bad, with a Greek spear, shield, and helmet, looking at the wall, which appears to be an island village with a "Claymation" cycloptic monster on it. Strong Mad can be heard doing the voice of the monster.}

STRONG BAD: {voiceover} ...is battling Claymation!

{The monster steps forward, roaring and swiping in Strong Bad's direction.}

STRONG BAD: It'll take more than karate pants to keep me from toilet-papering the temple of the gods!

{Coach Z walks in. Where his bright green body overlaps the wall, the green screen's image appears over him, leaving just his head and feet standing on the carpet. His usual "Z" medallion is replaced with a glossy curved medallion with fangs, resembling The Cheat's remake of the No Loafing sign. Strong Bad and the monster stop fighting. When Coach Z says "Check it out!", the monster looks at the Z emblem. When Coach Z says "and turned it all..." The monster gives a glance at Strong Bad.}

COACH Z: Hey, Strong Bad! Check it out! I squished it! And skewed it! And turned it all...

{The medallion is squished, skewed, and turned around. Both Strong Bad and the monster run off. The monster creates a motion trail while it runs away.}

STRONG BAD: Aaaaaaaaaaaah!

COACH Z: ...a...round?

{Cut back to the Lappy.}

STRONG BAD: {typing} Aww, forget it, Jamie. {said as "quay-quay"} If you're so bored with my style, here's a change for ya.

{Cut to the laundry room.}

STRONG BAD: {from offscreen} No, pan up!

{The screen pans up to reveal a seashell-themed wallpaper near the ceiling.}

STRONG BAD: I've put up this delightful ocean-themed border in the laundry room! Oh, and look!

{The screen zooms in on the dials on the washing machine.}

STRONG BAD: I hot-glued some actual shells onto the knobs of the washer and dryer!

{Cut back to show Strong Bad standing next to the washer.}

STRONG BAD: All for under fifty bucks!

{Cut to a close-up.}

STRONG BAD: Well, that's our show. Join us next week when we show you how to knit your own splatter paints!

{Cut back again.}

STRONG BAD: All for under fifty bucks!

{A logo for "redesigning SBEMAILS, JERK FOOT" appears.}

SINGERS: Ba-doo ba! Do Daaaah!

{On "Daaaah!", the words "FOR UNDER 50 BUCKS" appear below. The Paper comes down.}

[edit] Easter Eggs

Stupid Home Edition!

Do Loafing!

• Click on the "No Loafing" sign when Strong Bad is playing color wheel roulette with it to see the box design for Color Wheel Roulette Stupid Home Edition by Boardelectrix.

-50% fewer deaths than Russian variety
-Pant one, pant two!!
-Twice as many deaths as Garden Variety

• When "Do Loafing" starts to scroll by on the sign, click it to see a bumper sticker for Sucky Mountain, Colorado.
• At the end, click on "Jerk" which gives a "conversation" between The Cheat's redesigned No Loafing sign and the redesigned Coach Z emblem.

REDESIGNED NO LOAFING SIGN: {purrs, growls, and then roars}

REDESIGNED COACH Z EMBLEM: {runs away} Yorp, yorp, yorp, yorp, yorp!

[edit] Fun Facts

[edit] Explanations

The "New" No Loafing sign.

• The Lappy was covered in "LELLOWTAPE" because it had been nearly eight weeks (up to 55 days depending on when Strong Bad took the Lappy skydiving) since the last email.
• Green screens are used in film and television in order to have an alternate background behind the live action. The solid color wall is digitally replaced by a chosen background. This technique is called chroma key or color-separation overlay, and can actually be done with any color, though blue and green are the most widely-used since human skin tones do not naturally contain blue or green pigments.
• The No Loafing Scrolling Sign is actually a scrolling LED marquee (pictured).
• A cafetorium is a room used as both a cafeteria and an auditorium and often associated with older school buildings without sufficient room to have two separate areas.

[edit] Trivia

• This marks the first appearance of Monosodium Dreams, (an iMac G5 or iMac Core Duo), replacing the "Tangerine Dreams" iMac G3 The Cheat previously had.
• The floppy disk container reads "sundae drivin", which is the game Strong Bad plays on the greenscreen-painted wall.
• On the dryer, one knob reads, "Start"; the other has three settings: "Dry", "Real Dry", and "High & Dry".

[edit] Remarks

• Strong Bad is able to fluently type the word "redesign" with only his left hand, although it uses letters from both sides of the keyboard.
• Strong Bad's "Squish it, skew it, turn it all around" song has a similar rhythm to the "Email is nice, email is twice" song at the beginning of the email.
• When Strong Bad is playing Color Wheel Roulette, the No Loafing sign only cycles through five color schemes.
• Strong Bad asks The Cheat how he can print when "somebody sliced off the back of [his] monitor", yet his laptop screen is just as thin and he has no trouble printing The Paper out.
• The cartoon shows Strong Bad playing video games on his greenscreen-painted wall. This is actually impossible in real life, since chroma key only replaces green areas after processing the film or video output. (This is why TV weather forecasters have to look at an off-camera monitor to actually see the map they are pointing to.) Strong Bad would only ever see a green wall. The same goes for the battling claymation and being able to frolic through the bread aisle.
• On the scrolling LED No Loafing Sign, it is possible to see that the glowing lights do not line up perfectly, horizontally and vertically, with the dormant lights. Also, the words "No Loafing" slide across as a solid layer, rather than all the lights in each column lighting up one after another.
• None of the No Loafing signs are visible in the greenscreen scenes. In the real world, any of these signs would appear over the video being shown on the greenscreen.
• This email uses an older design of Strong Bad's face.
• Panning is a horizontal turn of the camera, not a vertical one, so panning up is technically impossible. The vertical motion is called tilting.
• Russian Roulette, if played with a six-cylinder revolver, should result in one death per six plays, on average. If the box is to be believed about death rates, then Color Wheel Roulette Stupid Home Edition should result in one death per twelve plays, while Garden Variety Roulette should result in one death per twenty-four plays.
• Although the sign says "no loafing", Strong Bad takes a trip to the bread aisle.

[edit] Goofs

• When Strong Bad clears the screen, the "I was just thinking how bored I am with your butt, and" line disappears prematurely.
• When the screen shifts to the No Loafing Sign, a second cursor can briefly be seen on the Lappy's screen.
• When Coach Z walks in front of the Green screen, the edge of the carpet can be seen through his ankles. This should not happen, as Coach Z's feet would fully block the view of the carpet whether the green-replacement effect has "removed" Coach Z's feet or not.

[edit] Fixed Glitches

• Due to issues with Ruffle after the post-Flash site update, the claymation monster and the background were not visible as the monster moved; instead, a white screen was displayed.

[edit] Inside References

• Strong Bad says "email is twice".
• "Scroll-a botones" was previously used in one of the Scroll Button Songs.
• The music that plays briefly in the background when Strong Bad starts "Color Wheel Roulette" is from The Show, as heard on Main Page 19.
• The box design for "Color Wheel Roulette Stupid Home Edition" is a reference to The Show! Stupid Home Edition from geddup noise.
• When Strong Bad's game says "Your James Over" at the end, it echoes the Homsar Main Page, where "Games" was pronounced "James".
• The explosion of the sundae looks very similar to the 'poofing' of Strong Bad's pants in senior prom, Pom Pom's smoke bomb in Summer Short Shorts, and the shell explosions in Let us give TANKS!.

[edit] Real-World References

• "Franklin Delano Loafing" is a reference to Franklin Delano Roosevelt, the 32nd President of the United States. It's also another instance of Presidents.
• "Flo-Jo" was a nickname for Florence Griffith Joyner, an American Olympic athlete.
• The famous phrase "No Whammies" comes from the game show Press Your Luck and its 2000s resurrection Whammy!.
• The Color Wheel picture is similar to that of Wheel of Fortune.
• The Color Wheel Roulette's claim of "50% fewer deaths than Russian variety" refers to the practice of Russian roulette, an infamously deadly game of chance where in any given turn, a participant has a one-in-six chance of dying. This implies a one-in-twelve chance of death for each turn of Color Wheel Roulette.
• Strong Bad's remark about dipping the sign in molten plexiglass to "give it that 'children under 3 are sure to choke on it' goodness" is a reference to a common choking hazard warning seen on most plastic products.
• "Redesigning SBemails" at the end is a reference to the many house redesign shows on channels such as HGTV.
  • The tag line "FOR UNDER 50 BUCKS" is a reference to budget redesign shows such as Design on a Dime.
• The "Cherry Get!" graphic that appears when Strong Bad is playing "Sundae Drivin'" is a reference to many Japanese video games, in which "[Object] Get!" is commonly displayed whenever players collect an object.
  • This was first noted in pre-release screenshots of the game Super Mario Sunshine, which showed the phrase "SHINE GET!" which has since reached memetic status.
• The scene with the stop motion cyclops is a mashup of Ray Harryhausen movies, most notably of The 7th Voyage of Sinbad, where Sinbad fights an orange claymation cyclops on the beach (though Harryhausen used his pioneering Dynamation technique instead of greenscreens).
• "Pant one, pant two!!" is a reference to the Pantone color matching systems.
• The "big as hams" reference goes back to before David Letterman made it big. He once lost a job as a weatherman on local news for stating: "... and there are hail stones the size of canned hams out there!"

[edit] Fast Forward

• Strong Bad's echo effect would be imitated later in hremail 3184, which came out after another extensive break from regular updates.
• A pumpkin depicting Coach Z's redesigned logo would appear in Punkin Show. It is called the "2006 Coach Z logo", referring to the year this email came out.
• Cards from the game Color Wheel Roulette would later be featured as secret bonus cards in Trogdor!! The Board Game.

[edit] DVD Version

• Strong Bad's line, "But what greens screens are really for—" is replaced with Strong Bad's previously said line, "Now just when you think you're done..."

• The DVD version features creators' commentary. To access it, switch the DVD player's audio language selection while watching.

[edit] Commentary Transcript

(Commentary by: Mike Chapman, Matt Chapman)

MATT: Oh, it looks like there had been a little, a little respite.

MIKE: I think this was the S to B break.

MATT: Oh, was it? Esteban Powell.

MIKE: Ummm... So, I just recently saw a redesign of... a potential redesign of the Atlanta Hawks logo.

MATT: Uh-oh.

MIKE: It looks terrible!

MATT: Really?

MIKE: Yeah

MATT: Does it follow the rules? Does did get—

MIKE: {interrupts} It does! It totally follows the rules! I mean—

MATT: {interrupts, overlapping} Shiny, and angular?

MIKE: It's already shin—and it's terrible now, and it got worse. And the sad thing is the Atlanta Hawks have probably have the best logo of all time, their '80s logo.

MATT: Yeah.

MIKE: Batman logo.

MATT: With all the retro, you know, with retro being so, so in, for the last twenty years.

MIKE: Yeah, the def... they wear those uniforms maybe once or twice a year, but, I don't know why, they just don't go back to it.

{pause}

MATT: Who is beat boxing, Mike? {At the "squish it, skew it, and turn it all around" part of the email} Was that you, or was that me? I don't remember.

MIKE: {overlapping} Probably you.

MATT: Oh. I'm not a very good beat box—

MIKE: Me neither! {laughs}

MIKE: I don't think I would have volunteered.

MATT: Uh, I know you got it.

MIKE: {laughs} Bids his beat into there!

MATT: Oh, what's that show called, no whammy show? {Mike says quietly "Umm... um..."} Press Your Luck?

MATT: Yeah.

MIKE: That little whammy's guy, it's a little gremlin, right?

MATT: Yeah, that came bac— Press Your Luck came back with like a terrible CG... {Mike can be faintly heard saying "Oh"} no whammy guy.

{short pause}

MATT: {At around the part when the fangs are added.} That is a slick logo!

MATT: It looks like it would go smooth, Mike.

MIKE: Hmmmhmm... a lozenge.

MATT: He's got a new, a new computer.

MIKE: The Tangerine Dream is gone.

MATT: It is. What is this called?

MIKE: {quietly} Umm... {giggles} Monosodium Dreams?

MATT: Yeah.

MIKE: That's what I called it.

MATT: {chuckles}

MIKE: {while Matt is chuckling} I don—I don't know.

MATT: Umm... Look, look this is gonna tell you what's for lunch today!

MIKE: I changed... we never put it up, I did another version where instead of the cartwheel guy—

MATT: Uh-huh.

MIKE: I did some hightops that are moonwalking.

MATT: Ha, ha, yeah! Why didn't we put those in?

MIKE: I don't know maybe we'll throw those in as an Easter egg here.

MATT: Steg? {short pause} Sometimes {Mike can be heard saying "Steg?" in the background} I call them stegs.

MIKE: Yeah? I've never heard you call him that.

MATT: Well, maybe that you're not around. When I, when I do that.

MIKE: I guess, I guess not. I'm kinda glad.

MATT: Mmm-hmmm.

{brief pause}

MIKE: So, here's a postcard, that our friend Ryan, sent us.

MATT: You probably don't wanna read that out loud.

MIKE: Oh, it just says "We got to see these mountains and the park around sunset time. It was beautiful and had a pink hue to the whole range." This is from the Guadalupe Mountains National Park.

MATT: Wow. I can't believe Ryan was so poetic.

MIKE: Mmm-hmmm.

MATT: {Strong Bad leans on the wall during the "Bread Isle" background.} Look at all that bread.

MIKE: From the Giant Foods upstairs.

MATT: Supa, supa giant. His a—what's wrong with his eyes, Mike?

MIKE: Well, Matt, let me explain to you about green screen technology! {Matt is heard faintly chuckling in the background.}

MATT: Uh, why haven't we made this game yet?

MATT: {In response to the words "CHERRY GET!" at the top of the screen} Cherry get! Look out for the wet—Oh, wet walnuts.

MIKE: That's a nice explosion, for a game of that caliber. {Matt chuckles}

MATT: Yeah, it's the Cheat Commandos explosion—Well, remember how good the Pole Position explosion was? That was like, photo real! I remember thinking it was photo-real. Pho-real! Do you think that—People saying "fo' real" comes from?

MIKE: Fo' real?

MATT: It's short for photo real?

MIKE: I do.

{pause}

MIKE: {Strong Bad is now in the laundry room.} Umm... So—

MATT: {overlapping} Our mom likes to watch shows like this.

MIKE: {laughs} Yeah!

MATT: I that that, I think somewhere in our—Mom's house there's a—a border like that.

MIKE: She may have hot glued some shells some uh...

MATT: {interrupts} Uh, no! No. That's a nice looking nautilus though. {Mike can be heard doing a short "chuckle"} I have to say that nautilus shell? I would put that in my bathroom.

MIKE: I'd put a Nautilus weight machine in my bathroom.

MATT: Oh, yeah?

MIKE: Yeah.

MATT: {As if he was trying to insult Mike} Jerk foot!

[edit] Fun Facts

• Super Giant Foods is a small chain of grocery stores in the Atlanta area.
• Pole Position was a racing video game released first in 1982 by Namco (licensed by Atari in the US).
• Nautilus is a manufacturer of fitness and exercise equipment, including the Bowflex and Stairmaster brands.
• Ryan sent a card from Guadalupe Mountains National Park.

[edit] External Links

• watch "redesign"
• watch "redesign" on the old Flash site
• view the Flash file for "redesign"
• forum thread re: "redesign"