Coach Z

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{{charnav|Coach Z|cz|Marzipan|Bubs}}
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{{acharnav|cz}}
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[[Image:coach-z.png|thumb|right|200px|"You can't just rush into the score zone!"]]
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==Biography==
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{{Infobox Main Character|img=Very Newest Coach Z.PNG|imgalt=He has more than two problems.|domicile=Locker Room|voice=[[Matt Chapman]]|debut=Where My Hat Is At?|3Dimg=CoachZ3D.png|3Dalt="Hey, watch where y'er pointin' that 3D!"}}
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'''Coach Z''' is the "[[Wikipedia:Coach (sport)|coach]]" of Homestar Runner and the gang, though it is unclear just which sports he coaches.  He has a strong [[Wikipedia:Upper Midwest|Upper Midwestern]] [[Wikipedia:North Central American English|accent]] which sometimes gets him into trouble. He almost never says anything negative to anyone, and he often offers more encouragement than is needed. When giving advice, he tends to start with the phrase "You can't just rush into the score zone", which by now has pretty much lost its meaning.  He wears a baseball cap and is famous for the large Z emblem around his waist, but nobody knows for sure whether his bright green color is his skin or a body suit. However, [[Middle School Variation#Baby Coach Z|baby Coach Z]] seems to be wearing footy pajamas in the email [[highschool]], and on more than one occasion, Coach Z has mentioned his [[Pants|pants]].
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[[Image:Coach z butt.PNG|thumb|Coach Z talking about his butt.]]
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'''Coach Z''' is the "{{w|Coach (sport)|coach}}" of the residents of [[Free Country, USA]], though it is unclear exactly which sports he coaches. While occasionally tiresome, and burdened with "more than two" socially awkward problems, he is always ready to offer encouragement and is rarely critical of anyone.  
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As Coach Z himself is not afraid to admit, he's got [[Who Said What?|more than two problems]]. Despite being a coach, he doesn't know what a basketball is, as indicated in [[secret recipes]]. It has been implied that he has a crush on [[Marzipan]], and he has on several occasions left inappropriate messages on [[Marzipan's Answering Machine|her answering machine]], including [[Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 5.0#Message 6|one occasion]] where he was drunk. (Further evidence of his drinking problem is his frequent consumption of [[Listerine|mouthwash]], as seen in [[The Best Decemberween Ever]] and [[Decemberween Short Shorts]], among other appearances.) Additionally, he had to apologize to her in the [[Fall Float Parade]] for "inapprapriate" comments. In addition to his frequent mispronunciations, Coach Z also seems to have mental problems, as evidenced by the time he spent "talking to his parents" on a [[Disconnected Telephones|disconnected telephone]], and claiming to be a mother in [[garage sale]]. He has even stated on [[Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 8.0|one occasion]] that he sometimes "forgets what's real, and what's just in his head". He also has trouble managing his money, causing his electricity to be shut off each year. He has an apparent fixation with butts, and he seems to have a habit with [[Butt Patting|butt patting]]. He was told by [[Homestar Runner]] in Decemberween Short Shorts to not tell people about his butt. He works with Homestar Runner and [[Bubs]] as the apparent [[Strong Bad is in Jail Cartoon|local law enforcement]] in [[Free Country, USA]], and he makes frequent jokes and references about pants, whether his own or someone else's.
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[[Image:Babycz.PNG|thumb|left|115px|The craptain of the foortball torm!]]
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==Characterization==
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Coach Z is a fan of hip-hop and rap music, particularly the [[Wikipedia:Wu-Tang Clan|Wu-Tang Clan]].  He fancies himself a rapper as well: He released the single "[[These peoples try to fade me|These Peoples Try to Fade Me]]," which appeared on [[Strong Bad Sings and Other Type Hits]], and his solo album, entitled "The Z Is All Up Ins", features the smash hit "[[Hip Hop Dance]]."
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Coach Z can often be found at the [[gymnasium]] or [[race track]] (indeed, he seems to live in the accompanying [[locker room]]), providing vague coaching or similar involvement with various athletics. When giving advice, he tends to start with the phrase "You can't just rush into the score zone", which has lost its meaning through time. In addition to working as a coach, Coach Z works with [[Homestar Runner]] and [[Bubs]] as the apparent [[Strong Bad is in Jail Cartoon|local law enforcement]] in [[Free Country, USA]].  Coach Z is also the janitor at [[the office]] where Homestar and [[Strong Bad]] work.  He is paid on hourly wage and is clearly jealous that Strong Bad is paid on salary. He has also spent time [[Blubb-O's Commercial|dressed as the Blubb-O's Drive-Thru Whale]] mascot. Coach Z owns four [[Wikipedia:Tony Award|Tony awards]], suggesting that he may have a background in theater. Despite his numerous jobs, Coach Z has trouble managing his money, causing his electricity to be shut off each year.
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Coach Z and Bubs had a falling out at one point, as [[Fall Float Parade]] tells us. But as of the email [[narrator]] it seems they're back to having boring conversations outside [[Bubs' Concession Stand]].  
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Coach Z is a fan of [[hip hop]] and rap music, particularly the {{w|Wu-Tang Clan}}.  He fancies himself a rapper as well: he released the single "[[These Peoples Try to Fade Me]]", which appeared on [[Strong Bad Sings and Other Type Hits]]; his solo album "The Z Is All Up Ins", featuring the smash hit "[[New Boots|Hip Hop Dance]]"; and his own rap song, "[[Rap Song]]" (featuring [[Peacey P]] and [[Tenerence Love]]). Although his usual rapping prowess consists mainly of "count[ing] to two over and over again", as explained in [[nightlife]], he once had a very successful career during his days in the [[Two-O Duo]]. More recent works such as "[[Loading Screens]]" and "[[Fish Eye Lens]]" may indicate that his rap skills are starting to improve.
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Coach Z owns 4 [[Wikipedia:Tony Award|Tony awards]] but it is unknown if he actually won them.
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[[File:Sketchbook 07-23-2009.png|thumb|Over the hill?]]
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Coach Z's [[Ages of Characters|age]] is somewhat ambiguous, though he typically is portrayed as older than characters like Strong Bad and Homestar: he appears to be grown up when Strong Bad was a kid in the email [[stand-up]] as well as appearing as an adult in 1974 in the 'toon [[Decemberween short shorts]]; in [[caffeine]], Strong Sad's slaps provoke him to cry out "I'm just an old man!"; in [[slumber party]], Strong Bad refers to him, [[Bubs]], and [[The King of Town]] as "older kids"; and while narrating an interaction between Coach Z and Bubs in [[narrator]], Strong Bad labels them both as "weird old men".
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*'''Domicile:'''  [[Coach Z's Locker Room]]
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Coach Z and [[Bubs]] [[Bubs and Coach Z's Relationship|had a falling out]] at one point, as [[Fall Float Parade]] shows us; Bubs makes a "Coach Z, you jerk!" float for the parade, and Coach Z retaliates by saying "Serves him right, then" when [[Strong Mad]] steals [[Bubs Concession Stand|his concession stand]]. In the email [[narrator]], it was shown that they had made-up and returned to having boring conversations about [[Bubs's napkins]]. However, in [[Most In The Graveyard]], when it is implied that Coach Z fancies Bubs' sister, Bubs beats him up. In the same toon, it is also revealed that Coach Z and Bubs may actually be very distant cousins, although Bubs finds this hard to believe.
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*'''Debut:''' "[[Where My Hat Is At?]]"
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*[[:Category:Coach Z Filmography|Complete Filmography]]
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<gallery>Image:coachzs Z.png|Coach Z's emblem
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Image:oldcoach.PNG|Youthful days
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Image:Coach Z- no hat.PNG|Hatless
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Image:ZsNewMedallion.png|His emblem, squished/skewed/turned all around (from [[redesign]])</gallery>
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== Character Video Transcript ==
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==="More than two problems"===
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''{'''Page Title''': Drop Down and Gimme 20!!}'' ''{'''Places:''' [[Coach Z's Locker Room]]}''
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{{seemain|Coach Z's Problems}}
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[[Image:Coach z butt.PNG|thumb|An unshaven Coach Z talking about his butt.]]
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As Coach Z himself is not afraid to admit, he's got [[Who Said What Now?|more than two problems]]. Despite being a coach, he doesn't know what a basketball is, as indicated in [[secret recipes]]. It has been strongly implied that he has a crush on [[Marzipan]], and he has occasionally made inappropriate comments about her; [[Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 5.0#Message 6|one occasion]] [[Marzipan's Answering Machine|on her answering machine]] when he was drunk, and another during the commercial break of the 4Tst annual [[Fall Float Parade]]. In [[diorama]], Coach Z even refers to Marzipan as his "gorgeous girlfriend". Coach Z also seems to have mental and gender confusion problems, as evidenced by the time he spent "talking to his parents" on a [[disconnected telephone]], and claiming to be a mother in [[garage sale]]. He has even stated on [[Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 8.0|one occasion]] that he sometimes "forgets what's real, and what's just in [his] head".  He has an apparent fixation with butts, and he seems to have a habit of [[butt-patting]]. He also has a slight obsession with ointments and body creams, like using 'Blue Star Ointment' to scare people in [[Halloween Fairstival]].  Many characters see him as a nuisance. Even Homestar treated Coach Z with contempt in [[Decemberween Short Shorts]], quickly refusing to allow Coach Z to come to his house for [[Decemberween]].
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'''COACH Z:''' ''{looking slightly offscreen}'' Is that thing on? ''{turns to the camera lens}'' Hey there, ho there! I'm the Coach! The Coach Z, I'd guess you'd call me. Or plain old Coach is fine, seein' as I'm the only one around, so, probably no one else would answer to that. You say "Hey Coach!", and I'd say "Yeah?" or..."That's me!" or..."Hoo-hah!" ''{waves his arms in the air}'' Any one of those. There's rumors flyin' around that I sleep in one of these lockers ''{gestures to the lockers behind him}'', but uh, that's just not true. I usually crash on this bench here. ''{gestures to the bench behind him}'' My back's not in real good condition. ''{rubs his back}'' And now, I'd like to perform my hip-hop single, "These peoples try to fade me." ''{holds up a microphone, begins to sing}'' A one-two, a one-two—!
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===Accent===
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{{seemain|Coach Z's Accent}}
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Coach Z has great difficulty pronouncing certain words, such as "job" (as shown in the "[[A Jorb Well Done]]" cartoon); the most commonly mispronounced sounds are long e (e.g. The Cheat/"The Chort") and the short o (job/"jaerb"), which both come out as an "or" or "aer".
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'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' ''{appears in front of camera}'' I'm Sorry. We're all out of tape.
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Occasionally, toons will imply that Coach Z is either deliberately playing up or entirely faking this manner of speech.
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==Coach Z's Accent==
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==Character Design and Conception==
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The primary factor in his hilarity, Coach Z's Upper Midwestern accent has made him into a very quotable character.
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{{seealso|Coach Z Evolution}}
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[[Image:oldcoach.PNG|thumb|150px|"The 74s was the prime of my datin' year!"]]
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''From [[UMFM Interview - 20 May 2003|a 2003 interview with ''UMFM'']]:''
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<blockquote>'''[[MATT CHAPMAN]]:''' [Coach Z's accent] came from a depressing Midwesterner voice that me and some friends would do in college.<br/>
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'''KEVIN SCOTT:''' With rapper lingo thrown in for good measure.<br/>
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'''MATT:''' We thought that was the funniest part: here's this guy that's just this very white bread, blue-collar sounding dude {{-}} but he's down with old school hip hop, and up on the latest in hip hop.</blockquote>
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===Phonetic Sounds Affected===
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Coach Z's name is derived from a nickname given to [[Craig Zobel]] {{--}} though Zobel was not particularly into sports, [[Giant Magazine Interview|college friend Bill Kramer called him "Coach Z"]]. Around the same time, [[Mike Chapman]] was writing the book ''[[Where My Hat Is At?]]'' and needed a coach character. With Zobel's nickname in mind, the character was dubbed "Coach ''Zee''", though his name was simplified to "Z" after this initial appearance.
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The most commonly mispronounced sounds are long /e/ (i.e. The Cheat) and the short /o/ (job), which both come out as an "or" or "aer" ("The Chort", "jaerb").
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===List of mispronounced words===
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The character's distinctive voice is derived from many regional American accents {{--}} most prominently {{w|North-Central American English|Upper Midwestern}}, {{w|Midland American English|Midland}}, and {{w|Eastern New England English|Eastern New England}} {{--}} and further exaggerated for comedic effect. Inspiration comes from both [[Indiana]] relatives and a funny voice [[Matt Chapman]] would use.
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{| border=1 cellspacing=0 cellpadding=2 width=100% style="border-collapse:collapse;"
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|- bgcolor=#eeeeee
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! Original Word<!-- Please add new words in alphabetical order! --> !! Coach Z's version(s) !! Appears In
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|-
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| '''About''' || Abrat || [[No Hands On Deck!]]
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|-
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| '''Action''' || Airkshin || [[Happy Fireworks]], [[Main Page 23]]
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|-
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| '''Awful''' || Orful || Email [[secret recipes]]
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|-
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| '''Balloon''' || b'lloon || [[Fall Float Parade]]
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|-
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| '''Bomb''' || Baermb || [[The House That Gave Sucky Treats]],<br>[[These peoples try to fade me]]
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|-
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| '''Captain''' || [[Media:Highschool 6.ogg|Craptain]] || Email [[highschool]]
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|-
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| '''Chips''' || Chorps || [[3 Times Halloween Funjob]]
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|-
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| '''Chocolate''' || Cherclate || [[3 Times Halloween Funjob]]
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|-
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| '''Crickets''' || Crackets || [[Happy Hallow-day]]
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|-
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| '''[[Decemberween]]''' || Decemberwern || [[The Best Decemberween Ever]]
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|-
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| '''[[DELETED]]''' || DELORTED || Email [[replacement]]
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|-
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| '''Did''' || Doird || [[Dangeresque (karaoke)]]
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|-
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| '''[[Fhqwhgads]]''' || Forhorgalingrads || Email [[sibbie]] (Easter Egg)
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|-
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| '''Field''' || Fierld || [[Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 1.0]]
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|-
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| '''Five''' || Farve || [[A Decemberween Pageant]]
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|-
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| '''Football Team''' || Foortball Torm || Email [[highschool]]
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|-
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| '''Gosh''' || Gorsh || Email [[strong badathlon]]
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|-
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| '''Gluten''' and '''Glutton''' || Glorten || [[Weclome Back]]
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|-
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| '''Halloween''' || Halloworn || [[The Best Decemberween Ever]]
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|-
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| '''Happy Hallow&mdash;''' || Horpy Horlow&mdash; || [[Happy Hallow-day]]
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|-
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| '''Happy T''' || Horpy Tor || [[Happy T!]]
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|-
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| '''Hello''' || Hellor || [[Homestar Presents: Presents]]
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|-
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| '''[[Homestar Runner|Homestar]]''' || Hamstray, Hamster, Stramstar,<br>[http://www.stairmaster.com Stairmaster], Homegrown, [[Wikipedia:Ramrod|Ramrod]], Humphel || [[A Jorb Well Done]]
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|-
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| '''Hoot''' || Hort || [[Happy Hallow-day]]
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|-
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| '''I Feel Bad''' || Ir feer borld || Email [[part-time job#Commentary Transcript|part-time job (commentary)]]
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| '''Idea''' || Idear || [[Happy Hallow-day]]
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| '''Inappropriate''' || Inapprapriate || [[Fall Float Parade]]
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|-
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| '''Inoculate''' || Anorculate || [[The Brothers Chaps' Fansite Acknowledgments#Burning Horizon Forum|BHZ Anniversary Message]]
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|-
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| '''Job''' || Jorb, Jaerb, Jarb, Joerghb, Jaeoreorb || [[A Jorb Well Done]],<br>Email [[boring (really)]]
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| '''Jujyfruits''' || Jorjyfruits, Jerjyfrorts, Georgie Frorgie,<br>[[Wikipedia:George Foreman|George Foreman]] || [[The House That Gave Sucky Treats]]
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|-
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| '''[[Coach Z's Locker Room|Locker]]''' || Lacker, Lacquer || Email [[part-time job#Commentary_Transcript|part-time job (commentary)]],<br>Email [[myths & legends]] (Easter Egg)
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|-
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| '''[[Mike Chapman|Mike]]''' || Mork || Email [[part-time job#Commentary Transcript|part-time job (commentary)]]
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|-
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| '''Mother'''|| Mudder|| [[No Hands On Deck!]]
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|-
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| '''Mouthwash''' || Mouthwarsh || [[The Best Decemberween Ever]]
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|-
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| '''Musical''' || Myorsical || [[No Hands On Deck!]]
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|-
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| '''Not''' || Nat || [[Decemberween Short Shorts]]
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|-
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| '''October''' || Orctober || [[The Best Decemberween Ever]]
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|-
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| '''Office''' || Arfice || [[In Search of the Yello Dello New Version|In Search of the Yello Dello]]
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|-
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| '''Party''' || Pratty || Email [[impression]]
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|-
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| '''[[Pom Pom]]''' || Pam Pam || [[Fall Float Parade]]
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|-
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| '''Problem''' || Praeblem || [[In Search of the Yello Dello New Version|In Search of the Yello Dello]]
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|-
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| '''Rock bottom''' || Rack battom || [[Decemberween Short Shorts]]
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|-
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| '''Real''' || Rrrl || [[A Folky Tale]]
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|-
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| '''Revealed''' || Revearled || Email [[cliffhangers]]
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|-
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| '''Secret''' || Sorcret || Email [[cliffhangers]]
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|-
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| '''Situation''' || Sitch'ation || [[A Folky Tale]]
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|-
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| '''Sports''' || Sprots || Email [[part-time job#Commentary Transcript|part-time job (commentary)]]
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|-
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| '''Swedish Fish''' || Swordish Feirsh || [[3 Times Halloween Funjob]]
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|-
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| '''Talkin' about''' || Torkin' abort || [[Happy Hallow-day]]
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|-
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| '''Terrible''' || Terbirle || Email [[senior prom]]
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|-
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<!-- Please do not add "Torm" unless a cartoon is released where Coach Z says this by itself.  In "highschool", he says "Foortball Torm", and that is covered further up in this list. -->
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| '''[[The Cheat]]''' || The Chort || ''see [[Nicknames#The Cheat|Nicknames]]''
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| '''Thug''' || Thorg || [[Halloween Fairstival]]
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|-
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| '''Thumb''' || Thermb || [[Some Stupid Turkey]]
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|-
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| '''[[Toilets|Toilet]]''' || Terlet || [[Halloween Fairstival]],<br>[[A Folky Tale]],<br>[[Halloween Potion-ma-jig]] (Bubs, Homestar),<br>Email [[unnatural]]
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|-
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| '''Tomato''' || Tomater, "[[Quote of the Week#QW-2005-12-08|I zader matermorts]]" || [[Fall Float Parade]]
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<!-- Please do not add "Torm" unless a cartoon is released where Coach Z says this by itself. In "highschool", he says "Foortball Torm", and that is covered further up in this list. -->
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|-
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| '''Trick or Treat''' || Track or Trort || [[3 Times Halloween Funjob]]
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|-
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| '''Twenty-Three''' || Tworty-Tree || [[Main Page 23]]
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|-
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| '''Undefeated''' || Undeforted || [[Decemberween Short Shorts]]
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|-
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| '''Yipe''' || Yorp || Email [[redesign]]
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|}
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===Inconsistencies===
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===Appearance===
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Coach Z wears a purple baseball cap with a blue bill. His head is a white sphere with light gray circles for eyes. Coach Z [[Lack of Visible Body Parts#Coach Z's Face|lacks a visible nose and mouth]], but is able to talk, eat, and spit with ease. He wears a large, gold "Z" medallion on his torso. His body is a bright green color, which is ambiguously either his skin or a body suit. His [[shapeshifter|sweatpants waistband]], [[Fish Eye Lens|"mittens"]], and [[Fan Costumes 2017|removing a skin-tight suit]] have been mentioned; alternatively, he has been shown to wear [[underlings|a bathing suit]] or [[Costume Commercial|a Halloween costume]] over the green. He has long arms and large feet, but very short legs.
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Evidence has suggested that Coach Z's accent may be bogus:
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{{Character Video Transcript}}
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*After saying "track or trort" in [[3 Times Halloween Funjob]], Bubs gets on his case and he says it correctly. If given "Swedish Fish," said as "Swordish Forsh," Bubs gets on his case again and Coach Z says "It's a crowd-pleaser."
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*In [[boring (really)]], while Strong Bad is writing his list of three-letter words, Coach Z interrupts him at the word "job", saying that "jorb is a four letters word."
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*Coach Z says "The Cheat" immediately after "The Chort" in [[mascot]], though he speaks as though he's talking about two different people.
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*In the DVD commentary for [[part-time job]], [[Mike Chapman|Mike]] exploits Coach Z's "accent" by implying that not only does Coach Z add the letter R to words, but now also likes to switch letters around sometimes, and in reply Coach Z partially admits to his accent being bogus.
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**Furthermore, Marzipan implies in [[Fall Float Parade]] that Coach Z's way of speaking may just be a made-up language all in itself ("That's Pom Pom Balloon, for those of you who don't speak Coach Z").
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*In [[cliffhangers]], in the process of his attempted unmasking of [[The Thnikkaman]], he says "secret sorcret" twice, referring to Thnikkaman's secret being revealed and his shame in having really bad hand-eye coordination.
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===Featured in===
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==Discography==
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*[[A Jorb Well Done]]
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[[File:sbemail128.png|thumb|"I'm about to have a dope rhyme attack!"]]
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*[[Coach Z Talker]]
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*"[[These Peoples Try To Fade Me]]" (2003)
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*"[[New Boots|Hip Hop Dance]]" (2004)
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*"[[Rap Song]]" featuring [[Peacey P]] and [[Tenerence Love]] (2007)
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*"[[being mean|Coach Z Gets Noice]]" (2008)
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*"[[Loading Screens]]" feat. [[Strong Bad]] and [[Homestar Runner]] (2009)
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*"[[Fish Eye Lens]]" (2014)
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*"[[The Wraparound]]" (2019)
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==Coach Z's "more than two problems"==
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===As a member of Two-O Duo===
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[[Image:BandTwo-ODuo.png|thumb|"One, two, one-one two."]]
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*"Lets's TP The Stick"
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*"Throwing Rocks Through Ol' Man Marzipan's Windows"
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*"Stealin' Stuff From My Own Dang Store"
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*"Kick the Chort"
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*He has admitted that he has [[Wikipedia: athlete's foot|athlete's foot]]. This was further implied as "problems with his feet" in [[rampage]].
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===Features===
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*In [[garage sale]], he is seen gathering up all the "great for baby" items, but is reluctant to explain why. When Strong Bad comments that "garbage sale" is "for moms only", Coach Z responds "Oh, then I'm okay to say it."
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*"[[Strong Badia the Free|Downright Homey]]" by Peacey P (feat. The Traitorous Coach Z)
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*His accent makes his speech almost incapable of comprehension
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*In his characters page, he admitted that he has a bad back. He also admitted this in [[rampage]].
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*He has been drunk multiple times, sometimes even on mouthwash.
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*He has really bad hand-eye coordination, as evidenced in [[cliffhangers]].
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*He has an obsession with butts.
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*He holds the record for the longest time gone without [[Showering|showering]].
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== Fun Facts ==
== Fun Facts ==
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*Coach Z's accent came from a depressing Midwestern voice that [[Matt Chapman|Matt]] and some friends would do in college.
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[[Image:torn_rubdominal_scrimmage.PNG|thumb|The emblem's a bone?]]
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*It was revealed in issue #21 of Wonkavision magazine that Coach Z is named after [[Craig Zobel]].
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*According to [[trading cards]], Coach Z gave 23 [[Butt-Patting|butt patts]] in 1984 (22 to Homestar, 1 to himself).
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*According to the [[Old Characters Page]], Coach Z wasn't much of a coach at the time, and he just added the title because it sounded "cooler than just Z". He has been seen coaching on numerous occasions since then, though his talent at it is still dubious at best.
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*Coach Z was originally known as "Coach Zee."
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*According to [[trading cards]], Coach Z gave 23 [[Butt-Patting|butt pats]] in 1984 (22 to Homestar, 1 to himself).
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*As said in the commentary for [[part-time job]], Coach Z has a "Lacker Room" to hold his Lacker. It turns out this "Lacker Room" is really a microwave.
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*Strong Bad referred to Coach Z as "Green Bubs" in the email [[road trip]].
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*In [[Date Nite]] he is shown without his hat and wearing hair curlers, despite a lack of visible hair.
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*On Coach Z's emblem, the darker blue shine streak under the gold Z makes a backwards Z formation.
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*Though not very expressive usually, later toons gave Coach Z an "angry eyes" expression (seen in [[Kick-A-Ball]] and [[hremail 3184]]).
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<gallery>
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Image:coachzs Z.png|Coach Z's emblem
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Image:ZsNewMedallion.png|His emblem, squished / skewed / turned all around (from [[redesign]])
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Image:Coach Z- no hat.PNG|A rare hatless appearance
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</gallery>
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== Relationships ==
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:''Main article: [[Character Relationships]]''
 +
*[[Bubs and Coach Z's Relationship]]
 +
*[[Strong Bad and Coach Z's Relationship]]
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*[[Marzipan and Coach Z's Relationship]]
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*[[Homestar Runner and Coach Z's Relationship]]
 +
*[[Strong Sad and Coach Z's Relationship]]
 +
*[[Strong Mad and Coach Z's Relationship]]
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*[[Coach Z and The Cheat's Relationship]]
 +
*[[Coach Z and Pom Pom's Relationship]]
== Variations ==
== Variations ==
-
*[[The Fort Wayne Locomotive]] ([[Old-Timey]])
+
[[File:ZSabre.png|thumb|"You simpleton!"]]
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*[[20X6 Coach Z]] ([[20X6]])
+
*[[Fort Wayne Locomotive]] ([[Old-Timey]])
 +
*[[Z Sabre]] ([[20X6]])
*[[Renaldo]] ([[Dangeresque (film series)|Dangeresque]])
*[[Renaldo]] ([[Dangeresque (film series)|Dangeresque]])
*[[Zubs and Coach B|Coach B or Zubs]]  
*[[Zubs and Coach B|Coach B or Zubs]]  
-
*[[Other Character Variations|Coach Zed]]
+
*[[Coach Zed]]
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*[[Strong Badman Characters#Damp Towel Man|Damp Towel Man]]
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*[[Zoach C]] ([[Xeriouxly Forxe]])
 +
*[[Yonder Website Character Variations#Character 3|Character 3]] ([[Characters from Yonder Website|Yonder Website]])
=== [[Halloween Costumes]] ===
=== [[Halloween Costumes]] ===
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In each Homestar Runner Halloween special, Coach Z has dressed up as a [[Wikipedia:Rapping|rapper]]. (The Noid costume was not released.)
+
In each Homestar Runner Halloween special, Coach Z has dressed up as something rap or [[hip-hop]]-related, or in the case of Theo Huxtable and Malcolm, something he ''believes'' to be hip-hop related. Strong Bad has questioned how much Coach Z actually knows about these artists.
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*[[Wikipedia:Flavor Flav|Flavor Flav]] in [[Homestarloween Party]].
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*{{w|Flavor Flav}} (of {{w|Public Enemy}}) in [[Homestarloween Party]]
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*[[Wikipedia:Shock G|Humpty Hump]] in [[The House That Gave Sucky Treats]].
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*{{w|Shock G|Humpty Hump}} (of {{w|Digital Underground}}) in [[The House That Gave Sucky Treats]]
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*[[Wikipedia:Christopher "Kid" Reid|Kid]] in [[Pumpkin Carve-nival]].
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*{{w|Christopher Reid (rapper)|Kid}} (of {{w|Kid 'n Play}}) in [[Pumpkin Carve-nival]]
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*[[Wikipedia:Kool Moe Dee|Kool Moe Dee]] in [[3 Times Halloween Funjob]].
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*{{w|Kool Moe Dee}} (of The {{w|Treacherous Three}}) in [[3 Times Halloween Funjob]]
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*[[Wikipedia:Tupac Shakur|Tupac]] in [[Halloween Fairstival]].
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*{{w|Tupac Shakur|Tupac}} in [[Halloween Fairstival]]
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*Theo Huxtable (from [[Wikipedia:The Cosby Show|The Cosby Show]]) in [[Halloween Potion-ma-jig]].
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*{{w|Theodore Huxtable|Theo Huxtable}} (from ''[[Bill Cosby|The Cosby Show]]'') in [[Halloween Potion-ma-jig]]
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*[[Wikipedia:Queen_Latifah|Queen Latifah]] in [[Happy Hallow-day]].
+
*{{w|Queen Latifah}} in [[Happy Hallow-day]]
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*{{w|So So Def Recordings}} Logo in [[Jibblies 2]]
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*{{w|Lance Robertson|DJ Lance Rock}} (from ''{{w|Yo Gabba Gabba}}'') in [[Most in the Graveyard]]
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*{{w|MC Skat Kat}} in [[Doomy Tales of the Macabre]]
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*{{w|Loose leaf|Notebook paper}} ("The Rapping Paper") in [[Which Ween Costumes?]]
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*[[A Tribe Called Quest]] (album cover mascot) in [[I Killed Pom Pom]]
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*{{w|André 3000}} (of [[Outkast]]) in [[The House That Gave Sucky Tricks]]
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*{{w|Kwamé}} in [[Later That Night...]]
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*{{w|PaRappa the Rapper}} in [[Haunted Photo Booth]]
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*{{w|Missy Elliott}} (as her head, with Pom Pom as {{w|The Rain (Supa Dupa Fly)|her inflatable suit}}) in [[Mr. Poofers Must Die]]
 +
*{{w|DJ Jazzy Jeff & the Fresh Prince|The Fresh Prince}}'s Mom in [[The Homestar Runner Enters The Spooky Woods]]
 +
*{{w|Del the Funky Homosapien|Del}} (from {{w|Gorillaz}}) in [[Halloween Hijinks]]
 +
*Malcolm (from ''{{w|The Legend of Kyrandia: Malcolm's Revenge}}'') in [[Halloween Hide & Seek]]
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*{{w|Darryl McDaniels|DMC}} (from [[Run-DMC]]) in [[2022 Costume Pack Now Available]]
 +
*A [[Beastie Boy]] (from ''{{w|Intergalactic (song)|Intergalactic}}'') in [[The Show: Ween Edition]]
 +
 
 +
[[Rejected costumes]] of Coach Z as {{w|The Noid}} and [[Bob & Doug McKenzie|Doug McKenzie]] have been shared; notably, these unused costumes have no connection to hip-hop.
==Quotes of the Week==
==Quotes of the Week==
{{qotwstart}}
{{qotwstart}}
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*{{qotw|"What kinda wood ya use there, Strong Bad? Cause y'know I knew a guy up in Paughkeegan who could work wonders with a piece of..."|[[The Luau]] extended take |Mirror:cz_wood.mp3}}
 +
*{{qotw|"I think there's a Blubb-O's Li'l Lubber's meal rattlin around up there somewhere."|[[On Break]] outtake|Mirror:cz_lillubbers.mp3}}
 +
*{{qotw|"You don't need no consummate V's to be my bride."|[[Trogday 08]] Easter egg|Mirror:cz_bemybride.mp3}}
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*{{qotw|"Mmmmm! Drink in that bun!"|[[environment]]|Mirror:cz_drinkin.mp3}}
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*{{qotw|"Coach Z, R-A-P. Accidentally featuring Peacey P..." ''{entire "Rap Song"}''|[[Rap Song]]|Mirror:rapsong.mp3}}
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*{{qotw|"I feel like that school child on the first day of Christmas!"|QotW exclusive|Mirror:cz schoolchild.mp3}}
 +
*{{qotw|"Oh. I guess I forgort to port. Oh! I guess I forgat to prat! OH! Gorka fa pork!"|[[mini-golf]]|Mirror:cz forgortport.mp3}}
*{{qotw|"You say tomater, I zader madermorts."|[[Fall Float Parade]]|Mirror:cz tomater.mp3}}
*{{qotw|"You say tomater, I zader madermorts."|[[Fall Float Parade]]|Mirror:cz tomater.mp3}}
*{{qotw|"IT'S DAZZLE-MAZING!!"|[[Happy Fireworks]]|Mirror:cz dazzlemaze.mp3}}
*{{qotw|"IT'S DAZZLE-MAZING!!"|[[Happy Fireworks]]|Mirror:cz dazzlemaze.mp3}}
Line 225: Line 148:
*[[Coach Z Other Costumes|Other Costumes]]
*[[Coach Z Other Costumes|Other Costumes]]
*[[Nicknames#Coach Z|Nicknames]]
*[[Nicknames#Coach Z|Nicknames]]
 +
*[[Coach Z Talker]]
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*[[Coach Z's 110%]]
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*[[Coach Z pukes in dude's toupee]]
== External Links ==
== External Links ==
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* [[HR:vcr_cz.html|watch Coach Z's character video]]
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{{nextlinks|vcr-cz|old=vcr_cz|title=Coach Z's character video|noquotes=true}}
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* [[HR:vcr_cz.swf|view the Flash file for Coach Z's character video]]
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{{Characters|Coach Z}}
{{Characters|Coach Z}}
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-
{{subtitlesLinks|vcr_cz}}
 
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[[Category:Word running gags]]
 

Current revision as of 19:03, 26 November 2024

Character: Coach Z
watch Coach Z's character video ← Marzipan Bubs →
Coach Z
He has more than two problems.
Domicile Locker Room
Voiced by Matt Chapman
Debut Where My Hat Is At?
Complete Filmography
Related Articles
Character Video
Character Relationships
Character Evolution
Other Costumes
Nicknames
3D Variation
"Hey, watch where y'er pointin' that 3D!"

Coach Z is the "coach" of the residents of Free Country, USA, though it is unclear exactly which sports he coaches. While occasionally tiresome, and burdened with "more than two" socially awkward problems, he is always ready to offer encouragement and is rarely critical of anyone.

Contents

[edit] Characterization

Coach Z can often be found at the gymnasium or race track (indeed, he seems to live in the accompanying locker room), providing vague coaching or similar involvement with various athletics. When giving advice, he tends to start with the phrase "You can't just rush into the score zone", which has lost its meaning through time. In addition to working as a coach, Coach Z works with Homestar Runner and Bubs as the apparent local law enforcement in Free Country, USA. Coach Z is also the janitor at the office where Homestar and Strong Bad work. He is paid on hourly wage and is clearly jealous that Strong Bad is paid on salary. He has also spent time dressed as the Blubb-O's Drive-Thru Whale mascot. Coach Z owns four Tony awards, suggesting that he may have a background in theater. Despite his numerous jobs, Coach Z has trouble managing his money, causing his electricity to be shut off each year.

Coach Z is a fan of hip hop and rap music, particularly the Wu-Tang Clan. He fancies himself a rapper as well: he released the single "These Peoples Try to Fade Me", which appeared on Strong Bad Sings and Other Type Hits; his solo album "The Z Is All Up Ins", featuring the smash hit "Hip Hop Dance"; and his own rap song, "Rap Song" (featuring Peacey P and Tenerence Love). Although his usual rapping prowess consists mainly of "count[ing] to two over and over again", as explained in nightlife, he once had a very successful career during his days in the Two-O Duo. More recent works such as "Loading Screens" and "Fish Eye Lens" may indicate that his rap skills are starting to improve.

Over the hill?

Coach Z's age is somewhat ambiguous, though he typically is portrayed as older than characters like Strong Bad and Homestar: he appears to be grown up when Strong Bad was a kid in the email stand-up as well as appearing as an adult in 1974 in the 'toon Decemberween short shorts; in caffeine, Strong Sad's slaps provoke him to cry out "I'm just an old man!"; in slumber party, Strong Bad refers to him, Bubs, and The King of Town as "older kids"; and while narrating an interaction between Coach Z and Bubs in narrator, Strong Bad labels them both as "weird old men".

Coach Z and Bubs had a falling out at one point, as Fall Float Parade shows us; Bubs makes a "Coach Z, you jerk!" float for the parade, and Coach Z retaliates by saying "Serves him right, then" when Strong Mad steals his concession stand. In the email narrator, it was shown that they had made-up and returned to having boring conversations about Bubs's napkins. However, in Most In The Graveyard, when it is implied that Coach Z fancies Bubs' sister, Bubs beats him up. In the same toon, it is also revealed that Coach Z and Bubs may actually be very distant cousins, although Bubs finds this hard to believe.

[edit] "More than two problems"

See main article: Coach Z's Problems
An unshaven Coach Z talking about his butt.

As Coach Z himself is not afraid to admit, he's got more than two problems. Despite being a coach, he doesn't know what a basketball is, as indicated in secret recipes. It has been strongly implied that he has a crush on Marzipan, and he has occasionally made inappropriate comments about her; one occasion on her answering machine when he was drunk, and another during the commercial break of the 4Tst annual Fall Float Parade. In diorama, Coach Z even refers to Marzipan as his "gorgeous girlfriend". Coach Z also seems to have mental and gender confusion problems, as evidenced by the time he spent "talking to his parents" on a disconnected telephone, and claiming to be a mother in garage sale. He has even stated on one occasion that he sometimes "forgets what's real, and what's just in [his] head". He has an apparent fixation with butts, and he seems to have a habit of butt-patting. He also has a slight obsession with ointments and body creams, like using 'Blue Star Ointment' to scare people in Halloween Fairstival. Many characters see him as a nuisance. Even Homestar treated Coach Z with contempt in Decemberween Short Shorts, quickly refusing to allow Coach Z to come to his house for Decemberween.

[edit] Accent

See main article: Coach Z's Accent

Coach Z has great difficulty pronouncing certain words, such as "job" (as shown in the "A Jorb Well Done" cartoon); the most commonly mispronounced sounds are long e (e.g. The Cheat/"The Chort") and the short o (job/"jaerb"), which both come out as an "or" or "aer".

Occasionally, toons will imply that Coach Z is either deliberately playing up or entirely faking this manner of speech.

[edit] Character Design and Conception

See also Coach Z Evolution
"The 74s was the prime of my datin' year!"

From a 2003 interview with UMFM:

MATT CHAPMAN: [Coach Z's accent] came from a depressing Midwesterner voice that me and some friends would do in college.
KEVIN SCOTT: With rapper lingo thrown in for good measure.
MATT: We thought that was the funniest part: here's this guy that's just this very white bread, blue-collar sounding dude – but he's down with old school hip hop, and up on the latest in hip hop.

Coach Z's name is derived from a nickname given to Craig Zobel — though Zobel was not particularly into sports, college friend Bill Kramer called him "Coach Z". Around the same time, Mike Chapman was writing the book Where My Hat Is At? and needed a coach character. With Zobel's nickname in mind, the character was dubbed "Coach Zee", though his name was simplified to "Z" after this initial appearance.

The character's distinctive voice is derived from many regional American accents — most prominently Upper Midwestern, Midland, and Eastern New England — and further exaggerated for comedic effect. Inspiration comes from both Indiana relatives and a funny voice Matt Chapman would use.

[edit] Appearance

Coach Z wears a purple baseball cap with a blue bill. His head is a white sphere with light gray circles for eyes. Coach Z lacks a visible nose and mouth, but is able to talk, eat, and spit with ease. He wears a large, gold "Z" medallion on his torso. His body is a bright green color, which is ambiguously either his skin or a body suit. His sweatpants waistband, "mittens", and removing a skin-tight suit have been mentioned; alternatively, he has been shown to wear a bathing suit or a Halloween costume over the green. He has long arms and large feet, but very short legs.

[edit] Character Video Transcript

See main article: Coach Z's Character Video

COACH Z: {looking slightly offscreen} Is that thing on? {turns to the camera lens} Hey there, ho there! I'm the Coach! The Coach Z, I'd guess you'd call me. Or plain old Coach is fine, seein' as I'm the only one around, so, probably no one else would answer to that. You say "Hey Coach!", and I'd say "Yeah?" or... "That's me!" or... "Hoo-hah!" {waves his arms in the air} Any one of those. There's rumors flyin' around that I sleep in one of these lockers, {gestures to the lockers behind him} but uh, that's just not true. I usually crash on this bench here. {gestures to the bench behind him} My back's not in real good condition. {rubs his back} And now, I'd like to perform my hip-hop single, "These peoples try to fade me". {holds up a microphone, begins to sing} A one-two, a one-two—!

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {appears in front of camera} Sorry. We're all out of tape.

[edit] Discography

"I'm about to have a dope rhyme attack!"

[edit] As a member of Two-O Duo

"One, two, one-one two."
  • "Lets's TP The Stick"
  • "Throwing Rocks Through Ol' Man Marzipan's Windows"
  • "Stealin' Stuff From My Own Dang Store"
  • "Kick the Chort"

[edit] Features

[edit] Fun Facts

The emblem's a bone?
  • According to the Old Characters Page, Coach Z wasn't much of a coach at the time, and he just added the title because it sounded "cooler than just Z". He has been seen coaching on numerous occasions since then, though his talent at it is still dubious at best.
  • According to trading cards, Coach Z gave 23 butt pats in 1984 (22 to Homestar, 1 to himself).
  • Strong Bad referred to Coach Z as "Green Bubs" in the email road trip.
  • In Date Nite he is shown without his hat and wearing hair curlers, despite a lack of visible hair.
  • On Coach Z's emblem, the darker blue shine streak under the gold Z makes a backwards Z formation.
  • Though not very expressive usually, later toons gave Coach Z an "angry eyes" expression (seen in Kick-A-Ball and hremail 3184).

Coach Z's emblem

His emblem, squished / skewed / turned all around (from redesign)

A rare hatless appearance

[edit] Relationships

Main article: Character Relationships

[edit] Variations

"You simpleton!"

[edit] Halloween Costumes

In each Homestar Runner Halloween special, Coach Z has dressed up as something rap or hip-hop-related, or in the case of Theo Huxtable and Malcolm, something he believes to be hip-hop related. Strong Bad has questioned how much Coach Z actually knows about these artists.

Rejected costumes of Coach Z as The Noid and Doug McKenzie have been shared; notably, these unused costumes have no connection to hip-hop.

[edit] Quotes of the Week

Coach Z's Quotes of the Week

[edit] See Also

[edit] External Links

Main Characters

Homestar Runner | Strong Bad | The Cheat | Strong Mad | Strong Sad | Pom Pom | Marzipan | Coach Z | Bubs | The King of Town | The Poopsmith | Homsar

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