Kick The Cheat Returns!
From Homestar Runner Wiki
| Toon Category: Puppet Stuff |
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A classic returns in this commercial for the Kick The Cheat reissue from Fangamer.
Cast (in order of appearance): Puppet Strong Bad, Puppet Homestar Runner, Puppet The Cheat, Shark-Tooth Bubs
Date: Tuesday, February 25, 2025
Running Time: 1:31
Page Title: The Stinkt of Exbrinction!
Contents |
Transcript
{Fade in. Jungle rhythms play. Text reads "Deep in the darkest backyard..." The leaves part to show Puppet Strong Bad and Puppet Homestar Runner.}
PUPPET HOMESTAR RUNNER: Strong Bad, no one has seen this elusive creature for 18 years. It has to be extinct!
PUPPET STRONG BAD: No way. I know it's out there! We're so close I can smell it!
{A yellow spotted thing whooshes by, spouting The Cheat noises.}
PUPPET HOMESTAR RUNNER: I heard a rustling!
PUPPET STRONG BAD: Shut up!
{The yellow spotted thing whooshes by in the other direction, spouting The Cheat noises.}
{Puppet Strong Bad raises his binoculars. A pair of eyes pop open in the lenses and look around.}
{In binocular view, a Kick the Cheat toy is visible standing behind a log.}
PUPPET STRONG BAD: There he is!
{Zoom in. A logo for Kick the Cheat appears.}
PUPPET STRONG BAD AND HOMESTAR RUNNER: It's Kick The Cheat!
{Wipe to a blue background. The logo spins into the corner. Logos for Cheap as Free and Fangamer appear.}
PUPPET STRONG BAD: That's right! Your favorite kickable yellow cheese-anvil is back!
{The Cheat noise}
{Cut to the outdoors, labeled "Fangamer Kick The Cheat Sanctuary". Several The Cheat toys are mulling about.}
PUPPET HOMESTAR RUNNER: Expert Fangamer zoologists have successfully bred Kick The Cheats in the wild,
{Cut to a line graph labeled "Kick The Cheat Endangerment Chart". There is a rise between 2003 and 2007, and a precipitous decline leading to a flatline until 2025, labeled "The Stink of Exbrinction. A The Cheat tumbles down the graph and down a vertical precipice.}
PUPPET HOMESTAR RUNNER: —bringing this beloved endangered species back from the stinkt of exbrinction!
{The Cheat cheers joyfully as a column of The Cheats sprouts from 2025.}
{Cut to a cross-section of The Cheat's anatomy. A flag reads "Unethical Procedural!" and a second reads "Fangamer". Plus signs jump out of the Fangamer flag into The Cheat's organ.}
PUPPET STRONG BAD: And thanks to unethical genetic techniques, they've made 'im better than ever!
{Cut to the toy standing on the carpet. A logo reads "More Squimp!"}
PUPPET STRONG BAD: Like new additional squimperin' sounds!
{Strong Bad's boxing glove bonks The Cheat over the head. The Cheat makes angry The Cheat noises.}
{Cut to the toy sitting on the couch next to some teddy bears. Homestar's foot kicks The Cheat. The Cheat whimpers.}
PUPPET HOMESTAR RUNNER: {rolling on the floor, crying} I'm sorry, The Cheat! I don't know what I'm doing with my puppet life!
{Cut to The Cheat's back, which has a zipper in it. A logo reading "Zipper'd Pouch!" appears.}
PUPPET STRONG BAD: And a new, zipper'd voice box pouch so you can change batt'ries!
{A purple hand unzips the zipper.}
UNZIPPED OPENING: {Powered By The Cheat voice} You can hide the cash and jewels inside of it... for me.
{Cut to a hand filled with dollar bills and colored plastic gems, making a "ding!" noise of majesty. The hand stuffs the loot inside the unzipped gap with a splat sound. The plastic gems roll out.}
{Cut to Puppet Homestar outdoors.}
PUPPET HOMESTAR RUNNER: It's truly a miracle of nature that this beautiful creature has been saved!
PUPPET STRONG BAD: Now, let's kick the crap out of him!
{Both yell and run towards the camera, and The Cheat lets out a terrified scream off-screen.}
{Cut back to the toy on the blue background.}
PUPPET HOMESTAR RUNNER: Reborn Kick The Cheat plush!
PUPPET STRONG BAD: Only available at fangamer.com!
{Fade to black.}
{Fade in. A hand is holding Shark-Toothed Bubs in front of a toy computer reading "Kick Cheat $500" and "Bid Right Now!".
SHARK-TOOTH BUBS: What about my overpriced online auctions? I gotta make a livin'... somewhat.
Fun Facts
Trivia
- The original run of Kick The Cheat dolls were described as "going extinct" when the doll had nearly sold out in December 2007.
- "The Stinkt of Exbrinction" is a spoonerism for "the brink of extinction".
- The Compy used by Shark-Tooth Bubs is a Tomy Tutor Play Computer.
Remarks
- As the Homestar Runner puppet does not have legs, a Homestar Puppet Plush was presumably used in the scene where Homestar kicks The Cheat.
Inside References
- The Cheat is once again compared to a cheese and an anvil. He was previously compared to both in quick succession in the Strong Bad Email huttah!.
- The cross-section of The Cheat is adapted from an illustration of the bisected Blue Laser Commander seen in Blue Laserdisc Challenge.
- Homestar Runner similarly rolled on the ground and wept "I don't know what I'm doing with my life!" in crying.
- The zippered pouch is labeled "Zipper'd".
- The open zipper talks in the same voice as the incision in Kick The Cheat Voicebox Replacement Surgery.
YouTube Version
- The YouTube version is titled "Kick The Cheat Plush Returns!"
- Its description reads:
Brought back from the stinkt of exbrinction! Fangamer zoologists have done the impossible!
Buy 'em up Dan: https://www.fangamer.com/collections/...- Buy 'em up and Dan are running gags.
