Nintendo Power Interview - July 2008
From Homestar Runner Wiki
Nintendo Power interviews Strong Bad about the upcoming Strong Bad's Cool Game for Attractive People.
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Transcript
NINTENDO POWER: Strong Bad's Cool Game for Attractive People is kind of a long title. Did you consider any alternate names?
STRONG BAD: "Strong Bad: Great Graphics, Great Gameplay, Great Guy" was the original name, but the marketing people said it sounded too much like "Adventures of Lolo," so we changed it.
NINTENDO POWER: What will happen to people who try to play this game but are unable to handle your style?
STRONG BAD: Temporary loss of vision, spontaneous diaper, cactus tongue.
NINTENDO POWER: Can unattractive people play your game? Will it make them more attractive?
STRONG BAD: Non-attractoids are perfectly welcome to try playing SBCG4AP, but I don't think they'll figure out how to make it past the title screen, and it definitely won't make them any more attractive. I made sure they programmed all that stuff in there.
NINTENDO POWER: How do you feel about potentially millions of players being able to control your actions?
STRONG BAD: I was very against it at first. I wanted it to be a sit-'n'-watch game instead of a point-'n'-click game. But then the programmers told me that's called a cartoon, and I already have one of those.
NINTENDO POWER: Why is your first game coming out on Wii and not other systems?
STRONG BAD: Because you promised me 500 rupees. And a pet Skulltula.
NINTENDO POWER: Do you have a Wii? How hard is it to play Wii with your boxing gloves on? What games do you play on it?
STRONG BAD: How hard is it for you to play Wii with your Power Glove on? Do they still make you wear those around the office? [Editors Note: Yes.] Oh, and the games I play on the Wii are all the free ones you're gonna send me.
NINTENDO POWER: Will that dragon you drew, Trogdor, appear the game?
STRONG BAD: That's a trade secret. All 46 of your readers would have to sign NDAs if I told you that.
NINTENDO POWER: You seem to have a lot in common with Nintendo of America president Reggie Fils-Aime. Are you related, by chance?
STRONG BAD: Look, whatever Reggie fills is his own business. He can fill his grandma's shoes with corn for all I care. Ooh, that's a good idea....
NINTENDO POWER: How would you react if you went to a restaurant for a burger, but they were all out?
STRONG BAD: Temporary loss of vision, spontaneous diaper, cactus tongue.
NINTENDO POWER: Why is your game coming out for WiiWare instead of as a retail game? Would it be cooler if it came with a box and manual?
STRONG BAD: Who was the last person that actually read a video-game manual? Galileo? Anyone who can't figure out how to mash a bunch of buttons on a game pad shouldn't be indulging in video-gamery in the first place. I will miss the eight blank pages for "Notes" in the back of the manual, though.
NINTENDO POWER: We were very excited to play Snake Boxer 5. How does it compare to the rest of the Snake Boxer series? What's your highest score in Snake Boxer 5?
STRONG BAD: Snake Boxer 5 revolutionized the franchise with its introduction of the health meter! It also made waves with its controversial subplot where the boxer falls in love with a Cottonmouth. As for my high score, after getting to round two zillion, my console melted into the carpet and mysteriously broke my camera, so I couldn't take a picture for proof.
NINTENDO POWER: Who is more awesome: Mr. T or Chuck Norris?
STRONG BAD: Strong Bad of America LLC does not comment on lame questions, trendy in-jokes, and played-out internet gags. [Editor's Note: We believe Strong Bad just can't handle Mr. T's style.]
NINTENDO POWER: Will players be able to use any of your awesome wrestling moves in the game?
STRONG BAD: Unfortunately, no. Most of my wrestling moves would require way more teraflops than the Wii can handle. Hey, that's a great name for a wrestling move: The Terror Flop!
NINTENDO POWER: Will there be any They Might Be Giants songs in the game?
STRONG BAD: Only if my nerd-music detector stops working. This is a Strong BAD game, not a Strong SAD game, man!
NINTENDO POWER: I know the game isn't done yet, but what kind of score do you think it will get on a scale of 1 to 10 (10 being the best), and why?
STRONG BAD: Oh wait, one's not the best? Thank you so much for explaining that new concept to me! You Nintendorks are a bunch of rocket scientists over there. Good thing, too. 'Cause it's gonna take a super genius to tabulate the astronomically high score of my game.
Fun Facts
Inside References
Real-World References
- Rupees and Skulltulas are from the Legend of Zelda series, a series made by Nintendo.
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