autobiography

From Homestar Runner Wiki

Revision as of 01:05, 9 September 2005

"...Milk and cookies shot out my nose!"

Strong Bad Email #67

Dan from PA asks Strong Bad if he will write a autobiography on his life.

Cast (in order of appearance): Strong Bad, The King of Town (Easter egg), Coach Z (Easter egg)

Places: Computer Room, Race Track (Easter egg)

Computer: Compy 386

Date: March 24, 2003

Running Time: 2:43

Transcript

STRONG BAD: This email is brought to you by a grant from The Cheat {a logo appears of The Cheat, captioned "The Cheat since 1983"} and the support of Viewers Like You. {"Viewers Like You" appears}

{reading}

Hey Strong Bad!
Have you ever considered writing a
biography on your life? I think it
would be a very cool idea since
everyone likes you anyway. I mean,
no one wants to read about a boring
person, like Strong Sad, or anything
like that.

Dan, PA

{Strong Bad temporarily stops and says "That's true!" after reading "everyone likes you anyway," and reads "Dan, PA" as "Dan from Pennsylvania"}

STRONG BAD: Wait a minute... lemme check something... {runs spellchecka.exe, it says "0 spelling errors found!"} No way! {typing} No misspellings, a good idea, made fun of Strong Sad ... don't get me wrong, Dan, I mean, I wanna make fun of you but, uh, you've put together a solid email! {while saying this, he types "No misspellings + good idea + made fun of dumpus = SOLID!!"} I'm gonna print this thing out and save it for posterity. Maybe a little prosperity. {He runs print_of_it.exe and the email prints out via the paper. He tears it off and starts typing.} Well, Dan, you big, dumb moron. I've actually already begun work on my memoirs. It's a new books-on-tape series called "Words I Probably Said" by Strong Bad. {stops typing} Let's take a listen.

{Cut to the booOOMbox, Strong Bad plays the tape that's in there}

STRONG BAD ON TAPE: —and Reg had the ball at the top of the key, and I was all like, "I'm open! I'm open!" But somebody musta slipped him some drugs or something before the game because he didn't see me and he passed it to the Deke instead and the Deke SLAM-DUNKED IT! Oh, it was my greatest moment on the court! I was trying to high-five everyone in sight but there was a lot of commotion and excitement and...the Deke accidentally shoved me to the ground and called me a—

{Strong Bad hits fast-forward)

STRONG BAD: Oop! We'll skip on ahead here.

{Strong Bad lets go of the fast forward button, and the tape continues}

STRONG BAD ON TAPE: —and she was a very, very special lady. And she loved me so much and had skinny blonde hair and was always hanging out at the beach, gazing at a photo of me... Too bad when she had to go to another planet for reasons too complex to elaborate on. I'll probably never see her again. And neither will any of you.

STRONG BAD: That was a true part! Let's skip ahead again.

{Strong Bad hits fast-forward again for a minute, then stops}

STRONG BAD ON TAPE: —but the Cheat couldn't stop laughing and I didn't know what the big deal was until I saw the piece of paper...I just about lost it! {a piece of notebook paper is shown which is a poor attempt at a counterfeit $1,000 bill} Milk and cookies shot out of my nose! Oh! It was a great idea. And it just might work!

{Strong Bad cuts in}

STRONG BAD: And it did work! All right, that's enough. You heard enough... of my secrets.

{Strong Bad seats himself back in front of the Compy}

STRONG BAD: {typing} So, you get the picture. I mean it's gonna be great. People will listen to it when they go on roadtrips. Maybe play it on their Walkman when they go jogging in the park. I mean, I bet it'll make people wanna run faster because of how good it is. That thing could double as one of those weightloss tapes. {stops typing} Okay. Take it away, The Paper! Preeeeeeeeowwwww... Come on. Preeeeeeowwwwweeee. What's the d—?

{The Paper comes down}

STRONG BAD: Oh. Musta been a paper jam.

Easter Eggs

• When you see Strong Bad's tapes come up, you can click on them to show the tapes inside. You can then click again to see the back of the box, mostly showing what Ike had to say.

Here's what they're
probably saying about
"Words I Probably Said"

"Hootie Hoo!"
-Ike Turner

"Hootie Hoo!"
-Ike Turner

"A nice, smooooth
drive."
-Ike Turner

"Hootie Hoo!"
-Tex Arcana

• When you hear Strong Bad talk about "Deke," you can click on the speaker to see a Deke trading card.
• When the sketch of the Strong Brothers' big idea comes up, you can click on it to see further details.
• At the very end you can click on "weightloss tapes" to see how effective the tapes just might be!

{Cut to what appears to be a track in the field. Coach Z is standing nearby looking at a stopwatch, while The King of Town slowly jogs by wearing a jogging suit, headband, and a Walkman. We can faintly hear Strong Bad's voice from the tape in the background.}

THE KING OF TOWN: Keep movin'! Work off the weight! This is a new beginning for the KoT! Oof!

COACH Z: This is a dark day for track and field.

Fun Facts

Remarks

• Oddly enough, two of the three tapes in the box and the one in the player are all labeled tape one. The other is labeled Tape 3.
• The tape he presumably took out of the boom box to exchange with his autobiographical tape was put into the case. It's labeled "SHAQ-FU."
• "print_of_it.exe" is the first of Strong Bad programs other than "strongbad_email.exe" that incorporate an underscore.
• This is the first time in a real email where The Paper prints something other than the "email Strong Bad" message.
• The King of Town's tapeplayer says "Sports Use."
• At the end of the email, there is not an "a>" and the back link extends a considerable distance to the left of the word "back."

Inside References

• The girl with skinny blonde hair is possibly a reference to the song "Circles", which features a skinny blonde girl, and to theme party (which is where "Circles" originated).
• The radio that plays the autobiography looks like the radio Strong Bad is listening to at the pool in A Jumping Jack Contest.

Real-World References

• The only thing that was probably said that Ike didn't say (see Easter Eggs) was by Tex Arcana. This is probably a play off the town of Texarkana, a town divided by the Texas/Arkansas border.
• Ike Turner was a bandleader for the sixties best known for his work with his wife, Tina Turner.

Fast Forward

• "Preeow" would be used again many times later as the onomatopoeia for The Paper's sound effect.

DVD Version

• All Easter eggs are accessible by using your DVD player's angle button.

External Links

• watch "autobiography"
• view the Flash file for "autobiography"