Teen Girl Squad Deaths

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"Everybody died 'cept me!"

The comic "Teen Girl Squad", written by Strong Bad, often has its characters die (or get injured) in each episode, due to being subjected to Strong Bad's overimaginative (and hilarious) cruelty.

[edit] Injuries and Deaths in Main Teen Girl Squad Episodes

Issue Cheerleader So and So What's Her Face The Ugly One Other
1N/A"Voip" by Visor Robot"Punt!" by dinosaur"Arrowed!" by Arrow'd GuyN/A
2"Grasp!" (Carried away by a large bat, survived)N/A"Bat! Bat! Bat! Bat! Bat! Bat! Bat!" by Thomas (survived)"Swoop!" (Carried away by a large buzzard, survived)No "I" in Team Boy squashed by "Children!" truck
3N/AN/A"possums..." (survived)"MSG'd!"(survived)N/A
4"Cerebellum'd!"Fell down a bottomless pitSquashed by "NO pounds" (survived)Squashed by "YOU'RE NOT" potatoes (survived)N/A
5"Sailing mishap!"Punted by Cheerleader (survived)N/A"Perch!" (survived)N/A
6"Double Double Whipless Mochaccino Half Caf!!" Decemberween Gift Exchange Lion (survived)"Triple Salchow!" Decemberween Gift Exchange Lion (survived)Wave of Babies (survived)"Cannonball!!" Decemberween Gift Exchange Lion (survived)N/A
7"Squished."Mrs. Commanderson (survived)Mrs. Commanderson (survived)Mrs. Commanderson (survived)Tompkins "died...somehow" (torso takes silver)
8Eaten by shark"Twelve sided died!!" (by a twenty-sided die)Eaten by shark"Floor tommed!!!! Step-mommed!!! Pom-Pommed??"N/A
9"Driver's Ed'ed Dead" (run over by Learner's Permit Girl)Put on a play with port-a-john, didn't get very good reviews (impaled by a spear by Arrow'd Guy)Ate a bowl of Staple SauceBFF-Baow! Fom! Froosh! (Punched by a tree, which then fell on top of her and spontaneously combusted)Mr. Pitters eaten by vultures
10"Caber tossed!!"p0wned! by Tompkins's video game"Lathe'd!" by A Mighty Warrior "ARROWED II!" (saved by Strong Bad)N/A
10 (Easter egg)Body parts rearrangedCrushed by giant golf ballLampshade covers headEaten by carnivorous plantN/A
11"Blinding Voip!" by Sci-Fi Greg's shirtless torsoIncarcerated after shoplifting (survived)"MANIAC IN A SPEEDO'D""MANIAC IN A SPEEDO'D"Camp counselor Shortshorts got "MANIAC IN A SPEEDO'D"
12Killed by flying USB dongle goblinRun over by TINES racing carN/A"Bad Juju!!"Class Prez killed by flying USB dongle goblin
13"Eau de Toilette!"Garbage disposal (Oh, what a way to go)The Snack mix, in Tompkins' parlor, with the PRETZEL STICK!"Dangled off a hotel balcony'd!!" "Then dropped from said balcony'd!" into a bayonet tailgate partyTompkins: "BABYSAT!"
14"Towel Boy'd!! Team Manager'd!!"So & So (as Scantron)'s Dixon Ticonderoga Laser Blade Attack vs. MimeogWrath's Hyper Turbo Fill in the Blank BarrageRevenge of the Cross Country Booster Club Bakesale!!N/ASeniors: "Come uppence!" with garbage cans dumped on them (survived)
15"Pretty Prism!!""Betrayal!!" by UbuntuFan91 (Open-Source Greg's Avatar)"Sparrow'd." (A new twist on an old classic!)N/AD n' D Greg: Gutted like sheep by Manolios Ugly One
Japanese Culture Greg: "Uncanny Valley'd!!!"
Tompkins: "Tenerrow'd!!"
HRTurned into stone by Medusa"Cliff Noted!" (eaten by Moby Dick)"A Splode!" (had her car blown up by gangsters)"GuesswhatVOIPed!" by a robotic penguinAny of the girls can also be killed by:
"Triple Doubled!" (getting dunked through a basketball hoop)
Mustard gas caused by perfume stank plus athletic stonk
"Alternative Energy Source'd!" (getting fried by sunlight reflected off a mirror while wearing suntan lotion)
"Fundamentals!" (getting her hairspray ignited by a flaming basketball)
"RATS LIKE METAL! ...Apparently" (trampled by rats after receiving a TXT MSG with the Brainkrieg Ringtone)
Getting stomped after METAMORPHOSING into a roach monster.
Robotic Penguin: Dies after choking on The Ugly One's chocolate bar
SBtFNo Unique Deaths"THE OPPOSITE OF RE-ENTRY'D!" (burned up in the atmosphere after flying a car into space)No Unique DeathsNo Unique DeathsAny of the girls can also be killed by:
"Di-GESTED WHOLE!" (eaten by an anaconda)
"BRAIN OUT OF NOSE WITH A HOOK!" (having brain removed while wrapped up like a mummy)
"GORE'D!!!" (during a mammoth stampede)
"SPEARROWED! (killed by a hunter after being mistaken for a sickly mammoth
"CROSS-FYAH!" (caught in crossfire between storekeeper and shopper with machine gun)
"SABER-TOOTH'D! TIGER... in case that wasn't obvious" (eaten by a saber-tooth tiger)
"CURSE OF THE GODS! THE NEW ALBUM FROM A-NOOB-IS!" (killed by scarab beetles sent by Anubis as punishment for insolence)
"Dead... Dead... Dead... Dead-dead!" (crushed by a monolith)
"METEOR'D!" (all mammals go extinct after a meteor causes global climate change, to which a Teen Girl reacts)
Lizard Teen Girl Squad: "SURVIVAL OF THE PHATTEST!" (killed by Charles Darwin's music)
BotB"Two Hand and One Foot Tapping Solo!" (Gary playing a guitar solo)"Roadie Miscommunication Breakdown!" (run over by Limozeen tour bus)"P-P-Punt!" by Perry, then "Arena Rocked!" (Cut in half by a helicopter propeller)"English Lit!" (Larry breathing fire)N/A

[edit] Injuries and Deaths in other Teen Girl Squad appearances

[edit] Analysis

Character Survived, Uninjured Survived, Injured Survived (Total) Survived Alone
Cheerleader3 (TGS 1, 2, 3)1 (TGS 6)4 (TGS 1, 2, 3, 6)1 (TGS 1)
So and So2 (TGS 2, 3)3 (TGS 5, 6, 11)5 (TGS 2, 3, 5, 6, 11)1 (TGS 11)
What's Her Face2 (TGS 5, 12)4 (TGS 2, 3, 4, 6)6 (TGS 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 12)1 (TGS 12)
The Ugly One4 (TGS 2, 10, 14, 15)3 (TGS 3, 4, 6)7 (2, 3, 4, 6, 10, 14, 15)3 (TGS 10, 14, 15)
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