specially marked
From Homestar Runner Wiki
| Strong Bad Email #194 |
|
Strong Bad educates us on the free toys found in cereal boxes.
Cast (in order of appearance): Strong Bad, The Cheat, Homestar Runner
Places: Computer Room, Strong Badia, Marzipan's House
Computer: Lappy 486
Date: April 21, 2008
Running Time: 3:08
Page Title: Lappy 486
Contents |
Transcript
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STRONG BAD: {singing} If everybody in the world checked their email, the internet would probably break.
subject: cerial box toysHey ho, Strongbad.
What kind of free toys would you put in specially marked
cerial boxes?
PB
Over the hills
{Strong Bad reads 'cerial' as 'keh-ree-al'.}
STRONG BAD: {typing} Ooh, I'm glad you asked, Problem Brian. I've been wanting to give specially marked boxes of cereal a specially marked piece of my mind for some time now.
{A dotted-line circle appears near the top of Strong Bad's head. Two lines appear, going from the circle to a new circle, this time larger and in front of Strong Bad's head. In the bigger circle, there is a picture of Strong Bad's brain.}
STRONG BAD: I pick...this one.
{An arrow points to a spot on the left side of Strong Bad's brain. He clears the screen, and the circles dissapear.}
STRONG BAD: {typing} Well before you get the toys inside, you first have to navigate the treacherous, jaggedy rock filled class 5 rapids of specially marked cereal box fake outs! Luckily, I'm a lame sandal wearing hippie with a ponytail hat's been down these rapids with groups of tourists many times!
{Cuts to Strong Badia, where Strong Bad and The Cheat, wearing a ponytail and a helmet, respectively, are in the 'Riverquest Safariventure' box, with a hose running in front of it.}
STRONG BAD: Ok, gang, now im gonna need everyone to lean hard to the right! (Strong Bad pulls out some sort of microphone and makes a click noise}
{Cut to Marzipan's kitchen. Strong Bad walks in from the right.}
STRONG BAD: One of the hazards you have to watch out for is cereals with anything grown in Iowa in the name. You know...
{As Strong Bad says the items, boxes of Corn Flakes, Wheat Chaff, Oh T'meel, Crispy Hog Crunchies, and Fundament-o's appear, in that order.}
STRONG BAD: ...corn, wheat, oats, hogs, fundamentally-sound college basketball players. Please, do stay away from these. Those cereals only put fitness-related crap in specially marked boxes.
{A picture of a step counter appears against a blue background. In flashing letters on the bottom, it says 'One Free TakesteppaTM Step Take Monitor!}
STRONG BAD: {Voiceover} Oh, great! I can count how many steps I took today!
{A picture of a defibrillator appears on-screen. At the top of the screen, it reads 'Clear?! One FreeTM Defib Kit Inside!}
STRONG BAD: {Voiceover} Fantastic! I can restart my heart if it stops!
{Cut back to Marzipan's kitchen, where Strong Bad's face is on a box of 'Hypothetic-O's'.}
STRONG BAD: What you do want to look for are cereals with sound effects in the name.
{The box flies off-screen. When Strong Bad names the sound effects, boxes for Fruit Smacks, Chocolate Breakfast Candy Bar Pops, Soundy Puffs, Blue Laser Blasts, and Sugar Rittled Gunshots in a Crowded Mall.}
STRONG BAD: {Voiceover} Smacks, pops, puffs, blasts, and, um, gunshots in a crowded mall.
{Cut to Strong Bad standing in the kitchen.}
STRONG BAD: You know, the kind with the squarey, sugared pieces of styrofoam that they claim are marshmallows. These are guarranteed to have a nice, big, {Cut to a dirty Strong Bad hand reaching in the box of Cheat Commandos O's} reach your nasty, unwashed hand straight to the bottom of the box toy in it. {Cut to Strong Bad standing in the kitchen.} Next up are the three most useless letters in the specially marked alphabet. {Zoom to Strong Bad's mouth} U...P...C. {Cut back to Strong Bad standing.} If you spot these wastes of seriff on a cereal box, {Cut to a bar code} turn and run as fast as you can. {Cut back to Strong Bad standing.} This means not only are they going to make you buy several more boxes that you have to cut the bar codes off of, {cut to a cereal box} but you're also going to have to involve your mom to write a check for the shipping and handling if she's back from Vegas! {Cut back to Strong Bad standing, talking angrily} The nerve of those cereals! You leave my mom out of this! {Screen changes, there is now a box of cereal on the desk.} Some cereals can't even be bothered with a toy at all. {Cut to box} They try and pass off the back of the box {Box flips, revealing a cutout of Crack Stuntman's head.} as some kind of prize. That dotted line you expect me to cut along is like a toyless slap in my face! Masks, mazes, word searches, PAH! {Throws box, cut back to Strong Bad standing} I know the kind of kids that enjoyed these funtivities on the backs of cereal boxes, and let me tell you, they were real easy to beat up.
{Homestar Runner walks in wearing a Crack Stuntman mask.}
HOMESTAR: Blah, Strong Bad, Blah! I'm a crappy Stuntman!
STRONG BAD: You know what kind of toys I'd put in specially marked boxes?
HOMESTAR: Yes.
{Zoom in on Strong Bad}
STRONG BAD: The kind that are {Reaches into a cereal box} heavy and pointy enough {Zoom in on box} to cause lasting damage to the face.
{Strong Bad takes out a chainsaw-car and throws it at Homestar.}
HOMESTAR: Strong Bad, while I'm down here, can you help me solve this word search? I can't find 'dextrose-flavoroids'.
{New Paper comes down}
Easter Eggs
- Click the words "Problem Brian" to see the book by Bev Sportsinterviews.
- Click on Homestar's foot at the end to see a printable Crack Stuntman mask.
- Click on Strong Bad's head at the end to see all the cereal boxes shown in the email.
Fun Facts
Explanations
- Class 5 rapids have rocks, waves and possibly a steep drop, requiring advanced rafting experience. It is the second highest of the six whitewater classifications.
Goofs
- The Problem Brian easter egg is still clickable when hidden by the closeup of Strong Bad's brain.
- The Email Strong Bad and Back buttons at the end of the email are still clickable when hidden by the Crack Stuntman mask's background in the easter egg.
- UPC codes and the numbers beneath them are actually sans-serif.
Inside References
- The chainsaw car is from what I want.
- Strong Bad's ponytail was first seen in bike thief as part of his college student persona.
- The walking man on the step counter is from 50K Racewalker.
- Corn Crunch was previously seen in death metal, where it contained a full-size alto saxophone (contradicting Strong Bad's claims in this email).
- The "riverquest safariventure" ride was first seen in theme park. The running hose next to it is also from said email.
Real World References
- The opening of the email, "Hey, ho, Strong Bad," is said in a way reminiscent of Blitzkrieg Bop by the Ramones. The song's chant was previously parodied in The House That Gave Sucky Treats, in which Marzipan dressed up as Joey Ramone.
- Strong Bad's brain is based off the one of the bosses in the Super Nintendo game Contra III: The Alien Wars.
- The Fundament-O's box resembles cereal brands like Wheaties, in which they put a popular athlete on the front of every box.
- The 'One Free Takesteppa Step Take Monitor!' is a reference to the free pedometers which have actually come free in boxes of certain healthy cereals.
External Links
- watch "specially marked"
- watch "specially marked" on the old Flash site
- view the Flash file for "specially marked"
- forum thread re: "specially marked"
