fan club

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Strong Bad Email #188
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"All right, deleteheads. It's been a big week for the fan club."

Strong Bad talks about his fan club, "The Deleteheads".

Cast (in order of appearance): Strong Bad, Strong Sad, Strong Mad, The Cheat, Homsar, Senor Cardgage, Homestar Runner, Marzipan (Easter egg), The King of Town (Easter egg)

Places: Computer Room, Strong Sad's Room

Computer: Lappy 486

Date: Monday, January 28, 2008

Running Time:

Page Title: Lappy 486

Contents

Transcript

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STRONG BAD: {singing} The green grass... Pleasant ghost... Strong Bad Email, make us some toast! {brings up the email}

{Strong Bad stutters the word "it''s a little, and pronounces "whose" as spelled (with an S sound).}

STRONG BAD: {typing} Ah, fan clubs. Sweet, innocent, restraining order-inducing fan clubs. Don't get me wrong, fans are great. It's the addition of 'club' that totally roons it. {clears the screen} Which is the opposite of how it usually works. For instance: turkey = {the word is typed in a dull brown colour; other voices accompany him} mrenh, turkey club = {the word appears in a rainbow of colours} mmmMMRENHhhhh! {the other voices cheer "Yay!"} But yes, there is a sbemail fan club. Its members call themselves 'Deleteheads' and in a chocolate-covered bit of Stockholm syndrome-esque irony, their president is brother Strong Sad!

{cut to Strong Sad standing at a table in his room. He is wearing a hat styled after a computer's delete key, which reads "Del" on it}

STRONG SAD: {singing} Population: Tiii-iii-iiire! {sits, producing the Geddup Noise} All right, deleteheads. It's been a big week for the fan club.

{cut to Strong Mad, The Cheat, and the Cinderblock sitting across from him, all wearing the same delete key hat}

STRONG SAD: We finally switched over our web hosting from Geofire {cut back to Strong Sad} to Angelcities.

{screen of the Deleteheads website, called "The Delete-Heads Website", pops up. There is a pixelated picture of Strong Bad dancing, as well as links to "Our friend Scott's website".}

STRONG SAD: And they've upgraded all of our dead links to hyperlinks!

{the website screen drops off again, showing Strong Sad once more}

STRONG SAD: We also had several interesting discussions in the ongoing debate series "Non Sequitur Champion: Cardgage or Homsar".

{scene cuts to one of the following, chosen at random:}

  • SENOR CARDGAGE: {standing next to a bag} Gardenias, monteljohn. Can you detect me to the nearest bus stamp?
  • HOMSAR: {wearing a computer key hat that reads "Thump"} My name's Millions, and I'm the son of a chipwich!

{cut back to Strong Sad}

STRONG SAD: ...Well, debate's over! Oh, and I just confirmation today that Abdi LaRue, {scene switches to the view of Strong Mad and The Cheat} sender of the first Strong Bad Email, {Strong Mad grins} is a lock for this year's FHQWHfest.

{the flier for "FHQWHfest '08" appears}

STRONG SAD: And there's a rumour going around that Stro Bro himself might show up to sign autographs!

{Strong Bad waks by, seen through the doorway, carrying an overly-long submarine sandwich. The sandwich continues to go by the doorway after Strong Bad's line}

STRONG BAD: Yeah... I'm not coming.

STRONG SAD: Don't forget to bombard Strong Bad with emails on Sunday night. {thumps fist for emphasis} I think we should go with asking about Bubs's first wife. Some good potential there. {at this point, The Cheat can be seen through the doorway, carrying the end of Strong Bad's sandwich} She was a real firebrand, that one!

{cut back to the Lappy}

STRONG BAD: {typing} So that's fan clubs, the next worst word you can couple with the word 'fan' is, you guessed it, {ominous, eerie music plays} the word {Strong Bad's voice distorts, and the camera zooms in on the word as he types it} 'fiction.'

{cut to a sheet of paper. The words appear typed on the paper as Strong Sad says them}

STRONG SAD: {voice-over} A Grade A Gray Day, a sbemail fanfic by S.Sad

{pan down to show the Lappy from the back. Strong Sad's words appear above the scene now}

STRONG SAD: {voice-over} The Lappy hummed quietly to itself.

{the scene changes to show Strong Bad rubbing his chin and puzzling over the Lappy. Strong Bad mouths the dialogue Strong Sad gives him.}

STRONG SAD: {voice-over} "Curious," said Strong Bad, "Very curious indeed."

STRONG BAD: Since that's totally the way I talk.

{cut to a shot of the Lappy's screen, showing the message "Your inbox has 0 new messages".}

STRONG SAD: {voice-over} His inbox flickered "0 new messages" back at him.

{cut back to a long shot of Strong Bad and the Lappy, with empty space on the left side}

STRONG BAD: Oh, this is definitely fiction.

{Homestar walks in, also mouthing the dialogue Strong Sad narrates. After the word "striding", the words no longer appear at the top of the scene.}

STRONG SAD: {voice-over} "Ahoy, Strong Bad," said Homestar Runner striding casually into the room. "You'll never have to answer another email again!" "Grandiose," replied Strong Bad, eyelids lowered. {Strong Bad lowers his eyelids} "What did you do this time?"

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Hey, Strong Bad. Check out my Strong Sad impression. Ahem.

STRONG SAD: "I turned them all over to Twelve-Times-A-Day Man!"

{Twelve-Times-A-Day Man, who is Strong Sad dressed in a yellow mask and cape, with a logo reading "12X" on his chest, flies down from the top of the screen and lands behind Homestar}

TWELVE-TIMES-A-DAY MAN: I can do it! I can do it twelve times!

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Hey, Strong Sad.

{cut to Strong Bad}

STRONG BAD: Twelve-Times-A-Day Man? You can't just start making up terrible new characters!

STRONG SAD: {voice-over} ...he said, putting on a bonnet, {a bonnet appears on Strong Bad's head} and giving Homestar a deep-tissue massage. {the Lappy flies up out of Strong Bad's way, as he raises his arms and approaches Homestar unwillingly}

STRONG BAD: Wah! No!!

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Oh, this gon' be good! {turns away so Strong Bad can rub his back}

STRONG BAD: That's it. Two can play at this extremely nerdy game!

{a piece of notebook paper comes down instead. His words also appear as he says them, while dialogue appears in word balloons}

STRONG BAD: {voice-over} INTO the MORONOSPHERE!! A deleteheads fan fiction, {the following does not appear} because I have plenty of time to say both syllables. By Strong Bad.

{cut to a rough drawing of Strong Sad sitting at a table, with a poorly drawn The Cheat and an angry rectangle}

Easter Eggs

  • Click on "deleteheads" to see a Deletehead's member card.
  • At the end, click on the first "grandiose" to see a scene with Vector Strong Bad.
    VECTOR STRONG BAD: YOUR HEAD ENGSMSPLODE.
  • At the end, click on the first "fan fiction" to see a scene with Marzipan.
    MARZIPAN: {playing a paddleball game until she misses} Aww, shootie-kahootie. I could only do it eleven times today.
    {Twelve-Times-A-Day Man flies down from the top of the screen}
    TWELVE-TIMES-A-DAY MAN: I can do it! I can do it twelve times!
  • At the end, click on "dabble" to see a picture of Homsar's Parents: a photo of a mug of coffee and a chipwich cookie.
  • At the end, click on "King of Town" to see Strong Bad's King of Town fan fiction.
    {a roughly drawn cartoon of The King of Town with a puddle in front of him, and an unknown substance splashed around his mouth}
    STRONG BAD as THE KING OF TOWN: I can't believe I ate that whole pile of whatsit!
    STRONG BAD: ...Said the King of Town.
    THE KING OF TOWN: I wish that were fiction...

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