An Important Rap Song

From Homestar Runner Wiki

Revision as of 00:57, 27 March 2007

Crack Stuntman has an important message.

Cast (in order of appearance): Gunhaver, Fightgar, Firebert, Blue Laser Commander,Blue Laser Minion, Silent Rip, Crackotage, Flashfight, Reynold, Ripberger, Crack Stuntman, Reynold's Brother, Foxface

Places: Cheat Commandos HQ, Blue Laser Cottage, Beach

Date: Monday, March 26, 2007

Running Time: 2:01

Page Title: We now return to the REAL Cheat Commandos!

Transcript

{Scene opens to a video camera-like opening screen with static at the top and "PLAY" and a timer going up from "0:20:14"}

GUNHAVER: {standing next to Fightgar and Firebert} —pants back on, Blue Laser!

{Cut to Blue Laser putting his pants on}

BLUE LASER: How could you possibly refer to these as pants?

{cut back to Commandos}

GUNHAVER: Ahhahaha! {turns to other Commandos} Cheat Commandos...riggidy-roll!

{The other Commandos look confused and surprised...cuts to Silent Rip}

SILENT RIP: Uh...that's not what we usually say!

{Cut back to Gunhaver}

GUNHAVER: Whatever, it's riggidy-roll from now on.

{Cut to usual end screen, "Buy All Our Playsets and Toys!!" appears on the screen and is sung to music. The text "created by A. Chimendez" appears at the bottom.}

{Cut to pink screen with a guy with a green shirt with "CRACK" on his shirt pocket}

CRACK STUNTMAN: Hi kids. {plunges at screen} BLAAAAH—I'm Crack Stuntman. {places hand on chest.} I'm the voice of the {removes hand from chest} gun-shaver on Cheat Commandos! Here with an important rap song about safety {holds up 1 finger} and spring break. {holds up another finger} {points offscreen} Bust it! {music starts playing, Crack's head bobs to the beat}

CRACK STUNTMAN:Well you're a rich kid, living in the suburbs and there's not a whole lot to do.

{shows Reynold's brother walking near a counter}

CRACK STUNTMAN:You're strolling to the kitchen and what do you find? A bunch of knives

{3 knives fall from the top of the frame}  

CRACK STUNTMAN: —cold staring at you. So,

{cuts to a white background and as the words are said, the words appear}

CRACK STUNTMAN:Kids {spelled as "KIDZ" on screen} don't play with {spelled as "wit'"} too {spelled as "2"} many knives.

CRACK STUNTMAN: C'mon, c'mon. {The words "C'mon C'mon" appear at the top in red, and two while silhouettes of Crack raise their arms on each "C'mon" spoken at the bottom.}

CRACK STUNTMAN: {A small are with Crack singing behind a pink background enlargen to fill the screen.} ,Crack Stuntman, gonna' save some lives. Awwww {The text "AWWW" runs across the screen in white.}

CRACK STUNTMAN:{Cut to a beach. Crack is wearing gold necklaces, and a Pistols For Pandas visor. His arms are crossed, and his index fingers are pointed.}...it's spring break. {The camera zooms in to a larger view of Crack, as he waves his fingers towards the screen.} Girlies running wild

CRACK STUNTMAN:{Tank tops stack on top of each other, all saying 'Fresh!'}Chests to the beach wearin' the freshest styles. {cuts to blue background, Alabama's background is outlined, then Gunhaver's face, hat and arms fill it} Meet a bunch of kids from Alabama!

CRACK STUNTMAN: {cuts to Commandos playing volleyball on the beach against Blue Laser...Silent Rip spikes the ball on Blue Laser's head} Beach volleyball slammajamma!

CRACK STUNTMAN:{cuts to a parking lot where two golf clubs aappear, and two of Cracks heads nod at the bottom corners.} putt-putt, go carts {A steering wheel appears over the clubs.}, bunjee-jumpin'!

CRACK STUNTMAN: {cuts to Crack Stuntman nodding in front of a wall that reads "LOUD BASS" in gray} Crack stuntman keeps the base bumpin'!

CRACK STUNTMAN: {cuts to him in gold necklaces and viso front of the words SPRING BREAK} Poo-ha-huh-ha-huh, poo-ha-huh-ha-huh. {cuts to five of him in a row on a tiled background} Poo-ha-huh-ha-huh, {cuts to pink background where these words appear on the screen: Poo ha huh ha huh } poo-ha-huh-ha-huh. {those words go across the screen, masking Stuntman singing} Poo-ha-huh-ha-huh. {his arm is scratching a disk to the beat} Poo-poo-ha-ha-ha-huh-haha-huh. {A stylized dollar bill goes on the screen reading at the top "Holler for a Dollar", and with Crack in the space where a president usually is} Holler for a dollar! Shout for some claps, somebody say holler for a dollar, let's turn this party out! Bon-fire on the beach (cuts to commandos and Blue Laser on the beach dancing near a bonfire, Foxface walks by}

Fun Facts

Explanations

• This toon is a parody of various public service announcements in which prominent media figures (celebrities, politicians, etc) attempt to give advice to children in the form of catchy songs, rap, etc. Common examples include campaigns against smoking and drug use.

Trivia

• This is the first toon in which Foxface has been animated.
• The sound quailty is much higher in this cartoon, similar to Homestar Presents: Presents.

Remarks

• The golf clubs displayed are not putters.

Goofs

• The Shorts section of the Toons Menu incorrectly displays the running time as 2:19, though the time is correct in the What's New section.

Inside References

• The visor Crack Stuntman is wearing has a Pistols For Pandas logo on it.
• The scene where an outline of Alabama is drawn is a reference to the "Brain Sister" segment of Summer Short Shorts, in which an outline of Texas is drawn.
• This is the second time Crack Stuntman has mispronounced Gunhaver's name.
• This is another reference to beach volleyball, which was first mentioned in Shopping for Danger.
• This toon makes reference to Pants

Real-World References

• In the page title, "the REAL Cheat Commandos" is a reference to the Ghostbusters cartoon The Real Ghostbusters.

External Links

• watch "An Important Rap Song"
• view the Flash file for "An Important Rap Song"
• download the song "An Important Rap Song"
• forum thread re: "An Important Rap Song"