Teen Girl Squad Issue 9
From Homestar Runner Wiki
When Cheerleader dies, the girls, along with an old man named Mr. Pitters, attempt to re-make themselves as the "Best Friends Squad."
Cast (in order of appearance): Cheerleader, So and So, What's Her Face, The Ugly One, Mr. Pitters, Learner's Permit Girl, Science Fiction Greg, Port-O-John, The Man with the Huge Mouth, Strong Bad, Tompkins (Easter Egg), Science Fiction Greg's Friends (Easter Egg), D'N'D Greg (Easter Egg)
Date: June 20, 2005
Running Time: 2:05
Page Title: Summatime Style!
Contents |
Transcript
NARRATOR STRONG BAD: Teen Girl Squad! Cheerleader! {screen shows Cheerleader, with "backyard pool!" next to her} So and So! {library!} What's Her Face! {24 hour diner!} The Ugly One! {parking deck?}
CHEERLEADER: Okay my spanish galleons, this summer's gonna be different! Say guh-bye to hanging out next to this old person!
{Mr. Pitters appears on the left hand side of the screen.}
THE UGLY ONE AND MR. PITTERS: Bye old person...
CHEERLEADER: Cuz now I'm best friends with an olda girl what has her LEARNER'S PERMIT!!!
SO AND SO & THE UGLY ONE: LEARNER'S PERMIT!!!
MR. PITTERS: {simultaneously} LEARNER'S OINTMENT!!!
WHAT'S HER FACE: I've had my license for a year-
CHEERLEADER: Stop saying words. here she comes now!
{Learner's permit girl appears and is driving really fast.}
LEARNER'S PERMIT GIRL: 10 o'clock and 2 o'clock!
{The Learner's Permit girl runs over Cheerleader. She dies.}
NARRATOR STRONG BAD: DRIVER'S ED'ED...DEAD
CHEERLEADER: Owww, my entire life!
SO AND SO: Whoa, Cheerleader's gone.
ALL 3 GIRLS: WE'RE FREE!
MR. PITTERS: We're ointment!
THE UGLY ONE: The tyranny is over!!
{So and So reappears in her opening frame...}
SO AND SO: I can overachieve like a bandit!
{...as does What's Her Face, who is thinking of Science-Fiction Greg...}
WHAT'S HER FACE: I can date science-fiction Greg again!
{...as well as the ugly one...who looks like a mess.}
THE UGLY ONE: I can stop showering!!!!
{...as well as Mr. Pitters...who looks like an old person teen girl, and wears a shirt with "boy toy" on the front.}
MR. PITTERS: I can be a teen girl!
{Two vultures appear over him.}
FIRST VULTURE: Ain't no teen girl.
{Cut to a dining room table where the vultures are seen eating Mr. Pitters.}
NARRATOR STRONG BAD: Chomp chomp chomp chomp...
SECOND VULTURE: Quite good, quite good.
NARRATOR STRONG BAD: ...chomp chomp...
{Cut back to the remaining girls}
SO AND SO: You guys, I think this might be the start of a kinder, gentler squad of teen girls.
{Cut to the intro to "Best Friends Squad." The normal music is switched for the Best Friends Squad theme, as sung by Strong Bad.}
STRONG BAD:
A glue stick, some glitta paint, {a "GLOO STICK" is seen on the first part, some "GLITTA PAINT" on the second}
Words cut out from a magazine, {Cut-out words are placed to read "Scrap BOOKS R Scrap TASTIC"}
BFF carved in a tree, {A heart with "BFF" is seen on a tree}
That stands for BAOW! FOM! FROOSH! {We see that The Ugly One carved it with the Big Knife, and the tree breaks, falls on her, and spontaneously combusts.}
A port-o-john came to life, {Which is exactly what happens}
Put on a play with So and So. {The port-o-john and So and So are seen on stage. The port-o-john wears a crown and holds a scepter. So and So wears a hat.}
Unfortunately, they didn't {So and So pretends to faint, and the port-o-john catches her. They stand up, and The Man with the Huge Mouth appears in the audience.}
Get very good reviews. {The Man throws a spear, which goes through So and So and hits the port-o-john in the face.}
What's Her Face ate Staple Sauce, {What's Her Face is seen next to a giant bottle of "STAPLE SAUCE"}
A heaping bowl of Staple Sauce. {She eats a bowl of it, and keels over, dead.}
Then crazy Learner's-Permit-Girl {We see her in her car.}
Gave-me-a-ride to Babbage's. {Strong Bad appears on the hood of her car, and then they're seen at Babbage's.}
STRONG BAD: What?! They don't got no Turbografx games?!
{Cut to the ghosts of the girls.}
CHEERLEADER'S GHOST: Okay, my art galleries, let's get ready to be...
ALL GHOST GIRLS: {Cheerleader says this with her usual enthusiasm; the rest look downhearted.} SO DEAD!!!!
MR. PITTERS' GHOST: I look so good.
NARRATOR STRONG BAD: IT'S OVER!
Easter Eggs
- At the end, click the "o" to see Sci-Fi Greg brag about how the ladies and Valkyries are all over his experience points.
- SCI-FI GREG: I knew she'd come back to me. Ever since my experience points went into triple digits I've had to keep the ladies and valkyries off with a 2 handed plus 3 broad sword.
- D N'D GREG: (leaning in from the left) Hey! Quit bitin my style!
- Also at the end, click the "!" to see the "Over Achiever" strike Tompkins' homework.
- TOMPKINS: (holding a piece of paper with mathematical symbols on it, graded "A+++++") Who did the rest of my pre-algebra homework?
- SO AND SO: (leaning in from the right, wearing a Lone Ranger mask and a hankerchief over her mouth) The over-achiever bandit strikes again!!!
Fun Facts
Explanations
- Although Strong Bad says BFF stands for BAOW! FOM! FROOSH!, the acronym is usually an abbreviation for "Best Friends Forever."
- Sci-fi Greg's speech in the Easter Egg uses terminology from Dungeons and Dragons, or "D&D", which is why D'N'D Greg accuses him of "bitin' my style."
- In America, a learner's permit is granted by some states to drivers as young as fourteen and once you have the permit, that driver must be accompanied by a licensed driver.
- A galleon was a large, multi-decked sailing ship used primarily by the nations of Europe from the 16th to 18th centuries.
Remarks
- Sci-fi Greg's bragging about his three-digit experience total is misplaced - assuming he plays Dungeons and Dragons like his namesake, he could get almost 100 experience points from a single encounter, and would need at least a four-digit total to reach level 2.
- This is the first TGS cartoon (not counting Issue 8½)that has neither an "Again" or "Back" link at the end.
Inside References
- Mr. Pitters's last line, "I look so good," is Cheerleader's last line in Teen Girl Squad Issue 1.
- Inside Babbage's is a sign that appears to offer Cheap as Free software (it is partially obstructed).
- This is the first Teen Girl Squad comic in which Strong Bad appears outside of an easter egg.
Real-World References
- Babbage's used to be a somewhat popular chain of software stores. It is now known as GameStop.
- The TurboGrafx 16 was a video game console released by NEC in 1989, for the North American market.
External Links
- watch "Teen Girl Squad Issue 9"
- view the Flash file for "Teen Girl Squad Issue 9"
- forum thread re: "Teen Girl Squad Issue 9"
Teen Girl Squad | |
---|---|
Characters | Main: Cheerleader, So and So, What's Her Face, The Ugly One Gregs: Sci-Fi Greg, D n' D Greg, Open Source Greg, Japanese Culture Greg Minor: Arrow'd Guy, The Birds, Brainkrieg, Fighting Growlbacks, Manolios, Mr. Pitters, Mrs. Commanderson, Olympic Man and Coach, Peacey P, Quarterman, she likes cloth, Thomas, Tompkins |
Issues | Main: Issue 1, Issue 2, Issue 3, Issue 4, Issue 5, Issue 6, Issue 7, Issue 8, Issue 8½, Issue 9, Issue 10, Issue 11, Issue 12, Issue 13, Issue 14, Issue 15 SBCG4AP: Homestar Ruiner, Cave Girl Squad, Teen Girl Squad Meets Limozeen Toons: 4 Gregs, Decomposing Pumpkins |
Miscellaneous | Locations, Costumes, Theme Song, Fangs, -'d, Ow! My X!, Captioned Transitions |
Other | Teen Girl Squad Deaths, 404'd, Neon 404'd, Teen Girl Squadcast |