Peasant's Quest Walkthrough
From Homestar Runner Wiki
The complete walkthrough for the game Peasant's Quest.
- Spoiler warning: Plot or ending details follow.
- (Click on the numbers above to jump to the walkthrough below.)
- STINK Like A Peasant — Blue Dots
- DRESS Like A Peasant — Gold Dots
- Get ON FIRE Like A Peasant — Green Dots
- Get Your Revenge On Trogdor (maybe) — Red Dots
 The Beginning
Before you do anything, you'll want to talk to the knight. He'll explain the whole quest to you, and give you a few tips on what you're allowed to do. He'll tell you that before you can go up the mountain to challenge Trogdor, you need to STINK like a peasant, DRESS like a peasant, and be ON FIRE like a peasant.
General note: In the true style of the old Sierra games, if you find things too slow, you can bump up the speed by pushing + a few times, and slow it back down by pushing -.
 STINK Like a Peasant
This quest corresponds with the blue dots on the map above.
- It's useful (though not worth any points) to get the map. This is back at your cottage, which can be reached by going W, S, W, W. Walk into your burninated cottage and type "look cottage". You'll discover that there's one piece of unburninated paper. Type "get paper", "get map" or "get unburninated paper" to have Dashing tuck it into his pocket. Dashing uses the paper to record where you've been. You can now access the map at any time simply by typing "map". (While the map can be printed via the "print" icon, the area around the map and down the rest of the page will be entirely black, wasting ink and creating a soggy page if you have an inkjet printer.)
- Go E and walk to the shore. Type "get pebbles" to pick up the small rocks. They'll be useful for step #3.
- Go S and S to get to the well, or just go north twice. Walk up to it and type "turn crank". You'll be told that the crank won't budge. "put pebbles in bucket" in order to make the bucket descend from the weight. "turn crank" to get the bucket back up, which should get you a monster maskus.
- Go S again, walk in front of the counter, and type "talk man" or "talk archer" to learn of the archery teacher's plight, and the secret word, "haldo", you should say to his brother if you ever meet him.
- Go W, W, N to get to the horse. Stand in front of him and "wear mask". You can now go through the fence to the west.
- Here you'll find the archer's brother. Say "haldo" and he'll leave. Walk up to the tree and type "get arrow".
- Go E, N, E, E, E to get to the house surrounded by bushes. Type "open door" to go into the hut and type "talk" to talk to the lady. She'll inform you that the Jhonka has taken her riches, and that she'll give you something special if you get them back for her. Remember that for later. She'll also tell you her baby lost something outside, and if you find it, it's yours. Before you leave, walk over to the shelves and type "get chicken feed". When you get outside, walk up to each of the berry bushes and type "get berries". At the fourth tree (no matter which order you do them in), you should get the super trinket.
- Go back to the archery counter by going W, N, N. Walk up to the archery counter and "talk". Then "give trinket" to be able to play the archery game. Type "play" in order to shoot. This is most likely the trickiest part of the game: you have to aim your bow according to the wind direction indicated by the flag on the right. Try to line up the tip of your arrow with the furthest right or left pixel of the blue circle in strong winds (flag moving due left or right), one pixel inside of the formost part of the blue circle during mild winds (flag diagonal), and directly at the bullseye when the air is still (flag down). To shoot, press space, and then press space again when the indicator reaches the red line. When the second indicator reaches the red line, press space a third time and you should get a bullseye. Get three bullseyes to win the SuperTime FunBow TM. You can now kill Kerrek.
- Go S, S to get to him (if he's not there, walk off and back on the screen a few times) and type "shoot kerrek". It will now start raining because the Kerrek's curse on the land has been lifted. Walk up to his body and type "get belt". Congratulations, you now STINK like a peasant!
 DRESS Like a Peasant
This quest corresponds with the gold dots on the map above.
- To start this quest, you'll need to get the loot back for the peasant woman. To do so, walk N, N, W to the mud puddle (which is now wet since it rained) and walk into the puddle to get covered with mud.
- Go W to get to the haystack, in which you'll need to hide to avoid getting killed by the Jhonka. Type "jump into hay" or "hide" to jump into the pile of hay.
- Waddle S in your new costume, walk up to the pile of loot, and type "get riches" or "get gold". Your costume will blow away and the Jhonka will be very unhappy and ask you if you took his riches. Simply type "no" and you're in the clear.
- Return to collect your prize by going S, E, E, E to the hut. "open door" gets you inside again, and then "give riches". Here you'll find out that the woman is a complete fraud and is wanted all throughout Peasantry. The riches were probably the Jhonka's to begin with, but the lady runs out leaving you alone with her baby. You can leave her to the knights. Anyway, you can use the baby to get four items.
- Go N and "talk man" to find out about the fishing. He needs a different kind of bait, so go ahead and "throw chicken feed" into the lake (you need to be on the east lake's shore for this to happen). The man will reel in a big catch, and return to work at the inn nearby.
- Go E and "open door" to go into the inn. "give baby" to the innkeeper to get the pills.
- Leave the inn and go W, W to the west side of the lake. Stand at the center near the left (the game is finicky about this, but try standing at the spot where the pebbles used to be) and "throw baby" to get the soda.
- Then go N, N to the well and "put baby in bucket" and "turn crank" to get the meatball sub.
- N, W, W brings you to the mysterious hut without a doorknob, which belongs to Naked Ned by the wavy tree. Walk to the right of the hut and type "move rock". The hole's a little too small for you to fit through, but someone else shouldn't have any problems. Type "deploy baby" to get the door open. The baby then scurries under the fence and you get to read a charming story about his future life. This game gets carried away often, doesn't it? Walk into the now opened hut and go over to the dresser. "open drawer" reveals a peasant robe. Take it with "get robe", put it on with "wear robe", and then just because you're so neat and tidy, close the dresser with "close drawer" to get an extra point. Congratulations, now you DRESS like a peasant!
 Get ON FIRE Like a Peasant
This quest corresponds with the green dots on the map above.
- Go E, E, E, E, N to return to the inn and type "open door" to get inside. "talk man" to learn how to spend the night, which he'll only let you do if you're wearing Naked Ned's robe. Type "get a room". You'll wake up 20 minutes later, at which point you should walk over to the pantry and "look pantry" to learn that the innkeeper seems to like a little something called "Old Man Rub" *ick*. You'll need the pot on the top shelf. Type "get pot", "get grease", or "get horse grease" in order to reach up and grab it. It will fall on your head. With your nouveau headwear, you have to navigate your way out of the inn, which can be a little annoying. The controls don't work correctly because you can't see. To move up, use the right arrow key. To move down, use the left arrow key. Left, use the down key. Right, up key.
- Go S and walk near the lantern. Congratulations, you're now ON FIRE and a true, honest to goodness peasant! (Note that if you go the wrong way for too long it will no longer be night. If it turns daylight and you are not on fire you have to go to sleep again, although you do not have to do the thing with the grease again.)
 Get Your Revenge on Trogdor (maybe)
This quest corresponds with the red dots on the map above.
- You can now go up to Trogdor's lair. Walk N, N to get to the guard and type "talk man" to get him to move. Walk E to get to the cliff, save your game, go up to the cliff, and type "climb" to get into an incredibly annoying Sierra-esque boulder and bird dodge-fest. The ledges and branches on the cliff do nothing, so don't bother with them. You'll have to go up three screens to get to the top.
- You are now outside Trogdor's lair. After the strange "Loading Disk 2" message, save your game again. Somehow, you cannot climb down. Walk into the cave and start heading E until you're accosted by the first keeper. You'll have to answer three questions about the game in order to make it to Trogdor. Alternatively, you can "give sub", "give soda", and "give pills" to skip the questions (either of these options gives you the same number of points). The questions and correct answers are listed below.
- Go E to meet your doom. The beaded curtain you just walked through will close and mysteriously not open. Don't walk too close to Trogdor. All you have to do is type "use sword" to attack the beast. Now you've gotten his attention and must deal with his majesty. Type "talk trogdor" or "talk" to face the burninator, thus completing the game. Or, if you want to complete the game without 150 points, just keep typing things. Eventually he'll just burninate you, but you'll still win.
Questions and Answers
- How many berry bushes are there in the whole kingdom of Peasantry? B. 5
- There are actually six, but apparently the game creators forgot the berry bush by the well. It doesn't respond to typical berry-bush commands, but it is regardless a berry bush.
- To whom did the robe you're wearing originally belong? C. Naked Ned
- What color are the leaves on the tree that grows by the well? A. Orange
- What did you win from the Archery game? B. SuperTime FunBow TM
- What does Mendelev have you tell Dongolev? A. Haldo
- What is the only creature the Jhonka fears? C. The Kerrek
- What was the Innkeeper's pantry full of? C. Old Man Rub
- Which one of these letters is the letter C? B. C
- Which way does the river that runs through Peasantry flow? C. Northeast to Southwest
Final score: 150 out of 150.
 Points Guide
Points ... Action
- 1......get pebbles
- 2......put rocks in bucket
- 2......talk to Mendelev at archery
- 2......scare Poor Gary
- 3......say haldo to Dongolev at the hidden glen
- 2......get arrow out of the tree in hidden glen, first attempt only
- 1......get chicken feed
- 2......get berries
- 2......throw chicken feed into lake
- 2......give super trinket to Mendelev
- 3......win SuperTime FunBowTM
- 5......use bow to kill the Kerrek
- 10.....get belt from Kerrek
- 2......jump into mud puddle
- 3......jump into hay
- 7......get riches at Jhonka's cave
- 5......give riches to Baby Lady
- 5......throw baby into lake*
- 3......put baby in bucket at the well*
- 2......get baby out of the well* (Note: while not required to beat the game, this must be done if you put the baby in the bucket, or you die somehow.)
- 5......give baby to the inn-keeper*
- 2......move rock on side of doorknobless cottage
- 5......put baby into the hole at the doorknobless cottage
- 10.....get robe in aforementioned cottage, AFTER opening drawer
- 1......close drawer AFTER removing robe in doorknobless cottage*
- 3......wear robe after getting it
- 3......get room in inn
- 2......get pot in inn
- 3......exiting inn with pot on head
- 10.....walking under candle in burninated trees
- 7......talk to knight, at Mountain Pass
- 3......successfully climbing the cliff without dying
- 5......answering the first question right in the inner sanctum/handing over the sub
- 5......answering the second question right in the inner sanctum/handing over the soda
- 5......answering the third question right in the inner sanctum/handing over the pills
- 7......use sword on trogdor
- 10.....talk trogdor*
*- denotes an action not required to beat the game but earns you extra points.
 Ways to Die
- Typing "die".
- Due to a glitch, you will also die if you press Enter or Return twice at the "Click anywhere to play", the save game screen after dying or at the game over screen.
- Attempting to harm/kill Poor Gary the horse by typing "kill horse", "kick horse", etc.
- Walking too close to the Kerrek.
- Typing TRY outside the Mysterious Cottage.
- It makes more sense if you first type CRAWL IN HOLE then CUT OFF ARMS LEGS AND HEAD, but works without those.
- Typing "quit".
- You don't actually die, you just return to the games menu.
- Walking in front of Dongolev's bow.
- Trying to TAKE ARROW before Dongolev leaves.
- Admitting to the Jhonka that you took his riches when he asks you.
- Dropping the baby in the well's bucket, then exiting the screen.
- Getting knocked off the cliff near Trogdor's lair.
- Failing the Trog-Trivia questions of any of the Three Keepers of Trogdor (a different message and animation for each).
- Technically, you don't die on all of them, but you lose anyways.
- 1st. Turn into Ron Cumberdale... impossible to kill Trogdor because the game won't let you for some reason.
- 2nd. Turn into an Old Guy Musician... also impossible.
- 3rd. Turn into a skeleton and perish.
- Technically, you don't die on all of them, but you lose anyways.
- Sneaking too close to sleeping Trogdor.
- Waiting too long before talking to Trogdor after he is awake.
This is the map of Peasantry. Move your mouse over an acre to see its name, or match it to the coordinates below.
|1A. Poor Gary's glen||1B. Kerrek tracks 1||1C. Old well||1D. Yellow tree||1E. Waterfall|
|2A. That hay bale||2B. That mud puddle||2C. Archery range||2D. River and stone||2E. Mountain pass|
|3A. Jhonka's cave||3B. Your burninated cottage||3C. Pebble lake west||3D. Pebble lake east||3E. Outside giant inn|
|4A. Outside mysterious cottage||4B. Wavy tree||4C. Kerrek tracks 2||4D. Outside baby lady cottage||4E. Burninated trees|
 See also
|Walkthrough | Items | Responses | Peasant's Quest Preview | Peasant's Quest Movie Trailer | Peasant's Quest Animatic | Peasant's Quest Outtakes | Your Hair is Messed Up | Here's How We Made It | Snowglobe | Characters | Peasantry|