Compy Catalog

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Toon Category: Shorts
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"The Roomy-Vac is a real powerHOUSE...get it? Oh, you don't? Well, because it's the size of a... Oh, you were kidding? You do get it? Pretty good, huh? No?"

It's here! It's here! The Compy catalog is finally here! Just in time for Strong Bad, too. And his decision was bound to happen.

Cast (in order of appearance): The Poopsmith, Strong Bad, The Cheat, Strong Sad

Places: The Mailbox, Strong Bad's Room, Basement of the Brothers Strong, Strong Sad's Room, Computer Room

Date: Monday, August 3, 2009

Running Time: 3:48

Page Title: If it doesn't say Compy, it might not be a Computer.


[edit] Transcript

{The Poopsmith opens Strong Bad's mailbox and puts a letter in it. He is wearing a postal uniform with a small picture of The Cheat on the shirt. He closes the mailbox and walks away. Birds can be heard in the background. Cut to Strong Bad's bedroom.}

STRONG BAD: It's here!

{Cut to The Cheat in the crisper drawer.}

STRONG BAD: It's here!

{Cut to Strong Sad's room.}

STRONG BAD: It's finally here!

{Music begins.}

STRONG SAD: It's here!

{Zoom in to Strong Sad.}

STRONG SAD: It's here! It's fina-lully here!

{Zoom out to a full-body shot. A marching fanfare starts. Confetti shoots out from off-screen.}

STRONG SAD: {singing and marching} There's no more time for expecta—

{Strong Bad pokes his head in.}

STRONG BAD: Shut up! {disappears, and the marching fanfare stops}

STRONG SAD: {sadly} That was the happiest I've ever been...

{Cut to the mailbox. Strong Bad runs to it and grabs a slip of paper inside it.}

STRONG BAD: I've been waiting all dang year for this!

{Zoom into a pamphlet that has the Compy logo on it, also saying "NEW PRODUCTS CATALOG". The oval landscape-oriented yellow sticker with the year "2009" on it has been poorly pasted over the year "1989".}

STRONG BAD: The 2009 Compy new products catalog!

{Cut back to Strong Bad.}

STRONG BAD: A new compy catalog is like Decemberween morning,—

{A picture of a present pops up in a thought bubble above him.}

STRONG BAD: —my birthday,—

{A bazooka pops up beside it; in a separate thought bubble (as will the following thought bubbles)}

STRONG BAD: —a candy store,—

{A SBLOUNSKCHED bar pops up.}

STRONG BAD: —and Strong Sad's funeral all wrapped up together in one piece of junk mail!

{A party blower pops up next and blows. The clouds then make a pop sound and poof away.}

STRONG BAD: Now I can finally find a suitable replacement for the Lappy!

{Strong Bad opens the catalog. Six laptops are on the first page, in various shades of tan. The text above the laptops reads "A rainbow of choices!" The text below it says "Fabulous flourescents!"}

STRONG BAD: Ooh, look at this new line of brightly colored Lappies! Neon Tan,—

{A laptop of that color appears on the screen.}

STRONG BAD: —Gray Passion, Rodeo {pronounces like "ro-day-oh"} Beige, Italian Same, Glittery Taupe.

{zoom out to a full body shot of Strong Bad.}

STRONG BAD: Seems like these are more for those stylish ladies and the rat-dogs they— Wait. Did they just try to tell me same is a color?

{Flips the page.}

STRONG BAD: {reading} Our most family-friendly Compy ever,

{Cut to a picture of a very large computer.}

STRONG BAD: The roomy-vac is a computer for the entire household! Whoa! Comes with built-in printer,—

{Cut to a zoom-in of a built-in printer with paper feeding out of it. The text "Built-in!" flashes.}

STRONG BAD: —eight-inch monitor,—

{Cut to a small monitor with a keyboard in front of it still built into the large computer. The text "Eight-in!" flashes.}

STRONG BAD: —three bedroom, two-and-a-half bath!

{A family appears in front of the computer.}

STRONG BAD: And a front door for easy access!

{A front door appears on the computer.}

STRONG BAD: {reading, monotone} The Roomy-Vac is a real powerHOUSE...get it? Oh, you don't? Well, because it's the size of a... Oh, you were kidding? You do get it? Pretty good, huh? No?

{The price "$240,999.99" is below it but not read. Cut back to Strong Bad.}

STRONG BAD: Why would they print that whole exchange? Anyway, what else they got?

{flips the page.}

STRONG BAD: {reading} Do you have problems opening up digital pictures of your grandkids or taking four consecutive steps? Then have we got a Compy for you!

{Cut to a computer. It appears to have a needlepoint screen. The border of the screen is stylized in a wood finish, making the computer similar to a framed needlepoint. "Grampy Aught-Six" appears in a fantasy-font. There is a green power light on the bottom-left of the screen, and it has a stand similar to the Compy 386.}

STRONG BAD: The Grampy Aught-Six utilizes easy to read 400-point type!

{As Strong Bad speaks, the letters "Dear Oldie," appear on the screen two letters at a time, scrolling with a clang sound.}

STRONG BAD: Turning even the shortest email into an unforgettable all-day affair! And you'll never lose track of our new—

{A very large arrow-shaped cursor appears on the screen.}

STRONG BAD: —meat-loaf sized cursor.

{The cursor transforms into a pixelly meat loaf.}

STRONG BAD: It's shaped like meat loaf too!

{Cut to a mouse.}

STRONG BAD: Optional mouse, that is an—

{The mouse transforms into an actual mouse.}

STRONG BAD:actual mouse that will pre-chew your food for you, sold separately. {cut back to the Grampy Aught-Six} The Grampy Aught-Six.

{Zoom out to Strong Bad.}

STRONG BAD: Because Piccadilly's not open 24 hours.

{Flips the page, followed by a record scratch.}

STRONG BAD: Oh, my goodness, graphics. I like the looks of {high-pitched} thiis!

{Cut to a picture of the Compé in the catalog.}

STRONG BAD: The Compé, because flat-panel sophistication demands made-up words.

{Further zoom on the Compé in the catalog. As Strong Bad talks, the camera goes across the top of the computer, starting at the right side and moving left. The screen is now blue, but no content is seen.}

STRONG BAD: The Compy Compé delivers European-sounding flair,—

{Europe flies on the screen with the text "FLAIR" in it. There is then a popping sound and it reveals the computer again. It is now revealed that "compé" is on the screen.}

STRONG BAD: —with southeast-Asian-sounding prices.

{Southeast Asia flies in with a dollar sign in it.}

STRONG BAD: My two most favorites!

{Europe and Southeast Asia collide and explode with a boom, which eventually takes up the entire screen. Cut back to Strong Bad who tosses the catalog in the air, which lands page-down and open.}

STRONG BAD: Sooold! I'm gonna put my eighty thousand pennies in the mail right now!

{Strong Bad tosses a very large bag onto the mailbox with the word "compé" written on it. Due to the weight of the bag, the mailbox gets crushed. There is a single stamp on the right corner. Some pennies fly out of the bag.}

{The following title screen is displayed:}

2-4 weeks later...

{Cut to Strong Bad sitting at the desk with the Compé sitting on it.}

STRONG BAD: All right, Compé, that accent mark better not let me down!

{He then turns it on by nudging his left boxing glove where the power light is located. The (pixelated) word "compé" fades in and slowly pops-out along with a white "spotlight". The computer sighs. "com" now appears in gold, with a pixelated shine, and the "pé" still appears in silver, but again with a pixelated shine. The accent on the é is shown to shimmers, which is also pixelated. The spotlights fades-out, while at one point "compé" is frozen on the screen.}

STRONG BAD: So sleek. So-phisticated. So, Compé.

{The logo shines left to right with the sound of a harp. Abruptly the Compé pulls up a system error, accompanied by the Compy 386 startup music, that reads the following:}

STRONG BAD: What the—{screams and stammers with frustration, accompanied by an increasingly loud buzzing sound}

{The computer laughs, and the words "i joké" appear on-screen, in the same manner as before. "i jo" appears in gold in the same way as earlier, and "ké" appears in silver as earlier. This time the logo slowly pops-in and fades-out. This continues as Strong Bad talks.}

STRONG BAD: Oh-ho-ho-ho. A wise guy, eh? I think you and me are gonna get along just fine, Compé.

{Cut to the picture of the Compé in the catalog.}

STRONG SAD: {quietly} It's here! It's here! It's fina-lully here!

{The party blower appears and blows.}

[edit] Fun Facts

[edit] Explanations

  • The Compé's error message, "Fragrant System Error. Your brand new computer is bloke." is an example of R/L confusion that often characterizes Engrish.
  • Strong Bad's remark about the Compé being delivered with "southeast-Asian-sounding prices" is a reference to the relatively low market cost of goods exported from southeast-Asian countries such as Indonesia because of the cheaper labor offered there.

[edit] Trivia

  • The RSS description of this toon reads "Unsolicited mail order catalogs are the best way to do ANYTHING."
  • The description for the YouTube version reads: "The 2009 Compy new products catalog has finally arrived!"
  • 80,000 pennies is 800 United States dollars.
    • Eighty thousand pennies would also weigh roughly 450 pounds (204.12 kg).
    • Shipping 450 pounds (204.12 kg) of pennies would cost approximately 320 US Dollars postage.
  • When zoomed in, the card on the Decemberween present in Strong Bad's imagination reads:
  • The background music when Strong Bad is browsing through the catalog is a techno remix of the theme heard in animal when he describes the features of the Lappy, and again when he describes the Steaky Steaky 6 Millennium Edition sandwich in hremail 3184.
  • The name "Grampy Aught-Six" may be a reference to the .30-06 (pronounced "thirty-aught-six") ammunition used in some semi-automatic rifles including the M1 Garand.
  • The Compé's error screen heavily resembles the Blue Screen of Death on older versions of Windows from around the time this toon was made.

[edit] Remarks

  • Assuming the laptop's screen hinges are facing upward, when opened, the Compy logo would be upside down. This may be a reference to older laptops, which always put the logo facing the user when closed. The practice of placing the logo upside-down to the user, to advertise the brand when the machine is open and in use, is a somewhat recent development.
  • The catalog showed six different colored laptops on one page, but five are shown individually.
  • Big parts of Europe are missing in the schematic "FLAIR" map, namely those parts east of Germany, Austria, the Czech Republic, and Italy; also missing are Scandinavia (except the Denmark section of Jutland) as well as several bigger islands (with Ireland, Great Britain, and Sicily the only islands represented). Much of the Malay Archipelago is also missing from Southeast Asia, with Borneo, Sumatra, and Celebes being the only parts of the archipelago shown, though Hainan, an island of China generally not considered part of Southeast Asia, is included in the map.
  • In shots of the Compé advertisement, the base and keyboard are not reflected.
  • The green light on the Compé in the catalog is noticeably larger than it is when Strong Bad uses it.
  • Although the catalog is officially listed as "1989", the Compé appears to be quite a modern computer.
  • Strong Bad appears to enjoy the Compé despite his usual preference for dated technology.

[edit] Goofs

  • Strong Bad's right arm is missing the second and third times he turns the page.
  • When Strong Bad's thought bubbles come up, the Decemberween present overlaps Strong Bad's "Birthday Bubble".

[edit] Fixed Goofs

  • "Fluorescent" was misspelled in the first page of the catalog.

[edit] Inside References

[edit] Real-World References

Poopsmith dressed as the Postman.
  • The Poopsmith is dressed as the Postman from The Legend of Zelda series, except with images of The Cheat on the hat and belt, instead of a bunny head.
  • Piccadilly is a cafeteria chain.
  • The Roomy-Vac is a take off on the UNIVAC, the first commercial computer. Early computers would usually occupy entire rooms or even buildings.
  • The current tech support smugness level is a reference to the United States' color-coded terrorism alert system (the highest level of which was red). It was introduced following the 9/11 attacks, but was abandoned in 2011, two years following this email.
  • The name "Compé" reflects a then-recent McDonald's ad campaign for its McCafé. In the ads, every noun is accented like the word "café".
    • It may also be a reference to the SAM Coupé line of European computers by Miles Gordon Technology.
  • Strong Bad's exclamation of "Oh, a wise guy, eh?" is a catchphrase frequently used by Moe of The Three Stooges.
  • The Compé's sigh upon booting up may be a reference to The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, imitating the doors on the Heart of Gold.

[edit] External Links

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