Dullard

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This article is about the comic strip. For the Strong Bad Email, see dullard.

Dullard is a comic strip by Levert Burtmore. It first appeared as an easter egg in the Strong Bad Email of the same name. It is a parody of the Dilbert comic strip by Scott Adams. It later appeared in the Puppet toon Biz Cas Fri 1, retirement, 4 branches and from work. Three additional comic strips that can be found only on the strongbad_email.exe DVD appear below.

Contents

[edit] Dullard 1 from Strong Bad Email #37

It's five.
PANEL ONE:
BALD MAN: {giving Dullard a piece of paper} I NEED THIS ON MY DESK BY FIVE.
PANEL TWO:
DULLARD: {giving the piece of paper to co-worker} I NEED THIS ON MY DESK BY FIVE.
PANEL THREE:
CO-WORKER: {giving the piece of paper to woman} I NEED THIS ON MY DESK BY FIVE.
PANEL FOUR:
WOMAN: {giving the piece of paper to comb-over man} I NEED THIS ON MY DESK BY FIVE.
PANEL FIVE:
COMB-OVER MAN: {dropping the piece of paper on bald man's desk} I NEED THIS ON MY DESK BY FIVE.
PANEL SIX:
ANIMAL WEARING TIE: IT'S FIVE.

[edit] Dullard (DVD version, method #2)

Yer job sucks.
PANEL ONE:
{Dullard is typing on his computer.}
PANEL TWO:
COMPUTER: BAD COMMAND OR FILENAME!
PANEL THREE:
{An irritated Dullard continues typing on his computer.}
PANEL FOUR:
TAKE-OUT GUY: TAKE OUT GUY!
DULLARD: MONEY'S ON THE FAX MACHINE.
PANEL FIVE:
COMPUTER: SUPER SYSTEM CRASH!
PANEL SIX:
{Dullard bangs his head on his computer.}
TAKE-OUT GUY: YER JOB SUCKS.
COMPUTER: TELL HIM ABOUT IT.

[edit] Dullard (DVD version, method #3)

You're a suck up.
PANEL ONE:
{The boss is pointing to a picture of a pie chart.}
BALD MAN: AND THAT'S WHY EVERYTHING IS AWESOME.
PANEL TWO:
DULLARD: I HATE OUR BOSS. HE CAN BOSS-OFF I SAY!
PANEL THREE:
CO-WORKER: OOH! I'M TELLIN'.
PANEL FOUR:
CO-WORKER: HEY BOSSYFACE, DULLARD HERE WAS JUST SAYIN..
{Dullard looks horrified}
PANEL FIVE:
CO-WORKER: ...HOW YOU'RE THE BEST BOSS IN THE WHOLE WHIRLED.
{Dullard looks relieved}
PANEL SIX:
BALD MAN: YOU'RE A SUCK UP.

[edit] Dullard (DVD version, method #4)

...then we made out on her desk.
PANEL ONE:
WOMAN: THERE'S A GOOD CHANCE I HATE DULLARD.
PANEL TWO:
COMB-OVER MAN: NOT ME. HE'S A GOOD VIDEO GOLF PARTNER.
PANEL THREE:
WOMAN: YOU MEN ARE ALL THE SAME. HONESTLY.
PANEL FOUR:
COMB-OVER MAN: WELL I HONESTLY THINK YOU'RE A HIDEOUS BAG.
PANEL FIVE:
WOMAN: HMPH!
PANEL SIX:
{Dullard is playing video golf.}
COMB-OVER MAN: ...THEN WE MADE OUT ON HER DESK.

[edit] Dullard 2 from puppet toon "Biz Cas Fri 1"

A meet n' greet?
PANEL ONE:
{Dullard is working at his computer. A woman is standing nearby}
WOMAN: MISSED YOU AT THE OFF SITE MEET N' GREET
PANEL TWO:
DULLARD: {irritated} THAT'S FUNNY. I DIDN'T MISS YOU AT THE MY HOUSE SIT N' DRINK.
PANEL THREE:
WOMAN: {storming off} HMPH!
PANEL FOUR:
{Dullard looks more irritated.}
CO-WORKER: MISSED YOU AT THE OFF SITE MEET N' GREET
PANEL FIVE:
BALD MAN: {holding pieces of paper} MISSED YOU AT THE OFF SITE MEET N' GREET
{Dullard bangs his head on his computer.}
PANEL SIX:
COMB-OVER MAN: WHAT'S THIS I HEAR ABOUT A SIT N' DRINK AT YOUR PLACE?

[edit] Dullard 3 from Strong Bad Email #159

You may be on to something.
PANEL ONE:
{Dullard is at his computer, with the boss behind him}
BALD MAN: I WANT YOU TO MEET OUR NEW I.T. PROFESSIONAL.
PANEL TWO:
BALD MAN: {pointing to a horse-headed person behind him} THIS IS RANDY. TREAT HIM NICE NOW.
PANEL THREE:
DULLARD: I'M A THOUSAND PERCENT SURE THAT'S A HORSE.
PANEL FOUR:
{Randy pulls out a handful of hay}
PANEL FIVE:
{Randy chews the hay}
PANEL SIX:
BALD MAN: {turns back to Dullard} YOU MAY BE ON TO SOMETHING.

[edit] Dullard 4 from Strong Bad Email #161

cL0Bb3R!
PANEL ONE:
{Dullard is at his computer, with the woman behind him}
WOMAN: I FORGOT MY PASSWORD AGAIN, DULLARD.
PANEL TWO:
WOMAN: THEY SAY YOU'RE S'POSED TO CHANGE IT EVERY NINETY DAYS...
PANEL THREE:
WOMAN: AND NOW YOU'RE S'POSED TO USE SYMBOLS AND UPPERCASE LETTERS...
PANEL FOUR:
{Dullard begins to get angry}
WOMAN: NO MORE BIRTHDAYS OR PET'S NAMES OR ANYTHING...
PANEL FIVE:
WOMAN: SOOOOO, WHAT'S YOURS?
{Dullard grabs his monitor}
PANEL SIX:
{Dullard clobbers the woman with his monitor, with the sound effect "cL0Bb3R!"}

[edit] Dullard 5 from Strong Bad Email #169

Whatever will become of the Breakroom Bruisers?
PANEL ONE:
COMB-OVER MAN: SO CORPORATE HAD A NEW NETWORK WIDE FIREWALL INSTALLED...
PANEL TWO:
DULLARD: IS IT OKAY THAT I TOTALLY DON'T CARE?
PANEL THREE:
COMB-OVER MAN: {walking away} I GUESS, BUT THAT MEANS NO MORE FANTASY FOOSBALL.
{Dullard looks surprised}
PANEL FOUR:
DULLARD: WHATEVER WILL BECOME OF THE BREAKROOM BRUISERS?
PANEL FIVE:
WOMAN: THIS NEW FIREMAN WON'T LET ME SEND YOU INSTANT MESSAGERS!
PANEL SIX:
{Dullard types rapidly with glee. Woman looks annoyed.}
DULLARD: I FIT TO LOVE THE NEW FIREWALL!

[edit] Characters

Most characters in the strip correspond with different Dilbert characters.

Dullard Character Dilbert Character
Dullard Dilbert
Bald Boss Pointy-Haired Boss
Generic Guy Ted, the Generic Guy
Female Alice/Carol
Short Comb-over Guy Wally
Rabbit wearing tie Dogbert, Catbert, and/or Ratbert
Randy the I.T. Horse Various animal coworkers

[edit] Fun Facts

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