The Homestar Runner

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This article is about the old-timey character. For the storybook world character, see The Homestar Runner (storybook). For Homestar Runner himself, see Homestar Runner.
"Go soak your fat head."

The Homestar Runner is the Old-Timey version of Homestar Runner. His primary interest is in finding something to eat with Old-Timey Marzipan and Fat Dudley during the Great Depression. He is frequently pitted against Old-Timey Strong Bad, who is typically unsuccessful at foiling The Homestar Runner's efforts.

The Homestar Runner can play "a mean worshboard" and appears to have incredible aim when firing a spitball out of a straw; he was able to peg Stinkoman in the eye from a great distance in 20X6 vs. 1936. He has also been kicking an old Can of Water Soup around ever since his dog "worshed" away in the storm of '28. While he seems to like most of the characters he meets, he dislikes Sickly Sam (their "worst friend") and Rumble Red, whom he labels a "Communist fool", and even killed him with the help of Old-Timey Marzipan and an invention.

Head shot straight-on.

The Homestar Runner apparently managed to call Marzipan using an empty soup can and a length of twine in Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 13.2, even though he exists in a different era than modern-day Marzipan.

He is Mike Chapman's favorite character in the entire Homestar Runner body of work. Mike thinks he's a lot smarter and more aware of what's going on than modern-day Homestar. Though this may be true, The Homestar Runner does not seem to be able to either hear or understand others very well, and often responds with a flat "What?" to other characters who try to converse with him. Like his modern day counterpart, he frequently mispronounces words, saying "accumulated" as "acoomalated" and "Communist" as "Commonest".

The Brothers Chaps refer to this character as "Old Timey Homestar," "Kick the Can Homestar," or simply "Homestar". He refers to himself as "The Homestar Runner". The Homestar Runner can make his legs longer. This was revealed in Ballad of The Sneak. He did it again in Sickly Sam's Big Outing.

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