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<?xml version="1.0" encoding="utf-8"?>
 <transcript xml:lang="en-us" width="550" height="400">
   <line start="15" end="74" speaker="strongbad">Gimme some of this and gimme some of thiiiiis... Gimme some of this.</line>
   <line start="77" end="136" speaker="strongbad">"Hey Strong Bad, How's it hanging? Last weekend I almost drank a one that was not cold."</line>
   <line start="138" end="189" speaker="strongbad">"Has this ever happened to you? Dan Waters Dallas, Tejas"</line>
   <line start="198" end="250" speaker="strongbad">Aw, Dan, you dodged a bullet, man. Because lemme tell you...</line>
   <line start="251" end="300" speaker="strongbad">a One that is not cold, is scarcely a One at all.</line>
   <line start="306" end="352" speaker="strongbad">Allow me to demonstrate with one of my bogus mathematical theorems.</line>
   <line start="355" end="409" speaker="strongbad">I call it "The Property of Ones." It goes like this:</line>
   <line start="410" end="478" speaker="strongbad">The ONE<sup>itude</sup> is directly proportional to the Cold<sup>itude</sup> of the ONE. </line>
   <line start="483" end="540" speaker="strongbad">So you got that, Dan? The colder it is, the more of a one it is.</line>
   <line start="542" end="595" speaker="strongbad">Because you don't want to end up with a Cold None. I wouldn't wish that on anybody.</line>
   <line start="605" end="666" speaker="strongbad">But now in foreign lands, they've been known to drink Not So Cold Ones,</line>
   <line start="670" end="717" speaker="strongbad">Room Temperature Ones, and even Warm Ones.</line>
   <line start="718" end="784" speaker="strongbad">Whoah! But where I come from, it's CUH-HOLD ONES.</line>
   <line start="790" end="865" speaker="strongbad">Though I have to admit, on certain evenings in late spring, a Cool One can be very refreshing.</line>
   <line start="872" end="899" speaker="strongbad">Ooh... That's a good one.</line>
   <line start="945" end="960" speaker="thepaper">Preeeeow!</line>
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