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Subtitles logo These are the English subtitles for long pants. watch this toon
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<?xml version="1.0" encoding="utf-8"?>
<transcript xml:lang="en-us" file="sbemail127.swf" width="550" height="400">
<line start="16" end="38" speaker="strongbad">And if I email you!</line>
<line start="40" end="72" speaker="strongbad">Girl, woman! Oh would you email me?</line>
<line start="73" end="97" speaker="strongbad">Girl, woman!</line>
<line start="101" end="116" speaker="strongbad">"Dear Strong Bad,"</line>
<line start="117" end="142" speaker="strongbad">"Why doesn't Homestar ever wear pants?"</line>
<line start="144" end="182" speaker="strongbad">"It's kind of creepy how he walks around with no pants on all the time."</line>
<line start="183" end="216" speaker="strongbad">"Anyway, blabbity blah, blah blebbity bloo,"</line>
<line start="220" end="241" speaker="strongbad">"I don't care, just get him some pants!"</line>
<line start="245" end="264" speaker="strongbad">"Toot-less, Clanky."</line>
<line start="267" end="316" speaker="strongbad">Aw, too long Clanky, too looong!</line>
<line start="317" end="338" speaker="strongbad">Good thing you didn't indent, man,</line>
<line start="339" end="376" speaker="strongbad">or this never woulda made it past my 2nd paragraph filter:</line>
<line start="377" end="390" speaker="strongbad">Edga Jr.</line>
<line start="390" end="395">
<strongbad>Edga Jr.</strongbad>
<sfx>computer beeps</sfx>
<line start="395" end="404"><line start="390" end="395"><span style="visibility:hidden">
<strongbad>Edga Jr.</strongbad></span>
<sfx>computer beeps</sfx>
<line start="405" end="473" speaker="strongbad">Aw, look at him. He's one o' them red-haireded rapscalli... wags.</line>
<line start="475" end="510" speaker="strongbad">Well, I think we can salvage this one with a little editing.</line>
<line start="511" end="544" speaker="strongbad">Let me once again call upon the services of my trusty,</line>
<line start="545" end="559" speaker="strongbad">somewhat dusty,</line>
<line start="560" end="603" speaker="strongbad">electronic light-pen input high-tech expensive device!</line>
<line start="607" end="621" speaker="strongbad">Now in HD!</line>
<line start="625" end="685" speaker="strongbad">Just have to shake up the...expensive electrons here...</line>
<line start="689" end="715" speaker="strongbad">All set! So, let's see!</line>
<line start="770" end="800" speaker="strongbad" volume="0.7">Expensive high-tech device...</line>
<line start="802" end="825" speaker="strongbad">There! Now let's see what we got!</line>
<line start="830" end="843" speaker="strongbad">"Dear Strong Bad,"</line>
<line start="845" end="859" speaker="strongbad">"Why wear pants?"</line>
<line start="861" end="890" speaker="strongbad">"Creepy pants all the time get some."</line>
<line start="893" end="922" speaker="strongbad">"Maybe parachute, maybe clown care."</line>
<line start="925" end="940" speaker="strongbad">"Some ants toot!"</line>
<line start="941" end="951" speaker="strongbad">"Clanky."</line>
<line start="958" end="990" speaker="strongbad">Now <em>there's</em> an email worth answering!</line>
<line start="992" end="1022" speaker="strongbad">Some ants toot. Tee-hee!</line>
<line start="1027" end="1050" speaker="strongbad">So, why wear pants?</line>
<line start="1053" end="1110" speaker="strongbad">An age old question. Was it not Adam West who once said, "E—"</line>
<line start="1110" end="1138" speaker="homestar">Hey, Strong Bad, check out my creepy pants!</line>
<line start="1138" end="1147" speaker="strongbad">Ew, Homestar! What're you wearing them Daisy Dukes for?!</line>
<line start="1147" end="1162">
<strongbad>Ew, Homestar! What're you wearing them Daisy Dukes for?!</strongbad>
<line start="1162" end="1185" speaker="strongbad">Ew, Homestar! What're you wearing them Daisy Dukes for?!</line>
<line start="1185" end="1214" speaker="homestar">'Cuz you said, "Creepy pants all the time get some."</line>
<line start="1216" end="1230" speaker="strongbad">Get some what?</line>
<line start="1232" end="1256" speaker="homestar">I dunno. Light globes?</line>
<line start="1262" end="1276" speaker="strongbad">...Light globes.</line>
<line start="1278" end="1308" speaker="homestar">You know, like in a lamp! Light globes!</line>
<line start="1309" end="1322" speaker="sfx">sheen</line>
<line start="1322" end="1374" speaker="strongbad">So... You put on hot pants in the hopes of getting some lightbulbs.</line>
<line start="1375" end="1386">
<line start="1388" end="1420" speaker="strongbad">Well, since you're here, let's talk about your pants.</line>
<line start="1421" end="1456" speaker="strongbad">Or your lack thereof... Daisy Dukes aside.</line>
<line start="1456" end="1480" speaker="homestar">What are you talking about, Strong Bad?</line>
<line start="1482" end="1501" speaker="homestar">I wear long pants.</line>
<line start="1503" end="1545" speaker="strongbad">Um... no, from what I can tell, you wear</line>
<line start="1546" end="1594" speaker="strongbad"><em>no</em> pants and have blue soles glued to the bottoms of your feet.</line>
<line start="1595" end="1618" speaker="homestar">Well, that's simply not true!</line>
<line start="1618" end="1664" speaker="homestar">I have long pants, I wear long pants. I'm a long pants man, long pants, long pants!</line>
<line start="1665" end="1689" speaker="strongbad">Okay, calm down... I didn't mean to—</line>
<line start="1689" end="1701" speaker="homestar">Long pants, Strong Bad!</line>
<line start="1703" end="1730" speaker="homestar">The longest pants! Everybody everybody! Longest pants!</line>
  <line start="1730" end="1732" speaker="homestar">
    <span style="visibility:hidden">long-------long-------long-------long-------long-------</span>Long<br />
  <line start="1732" end="1734" speaker="homestar">
    <span style="visibility:hidden">long-------long-------long-------long-------</span>long<span style="visibility:hidden">-------</span>Long<br />
  <line start="1734" end="1736" speaker="homestar">
    long<span style="visibility:hidden">-------long-------long-------long-------</span>long<span style="visibility:hidden">-------</span>Long<br />
  <line start="1736" end="1738" speaker="homestar">
    long<span style="visibility:hidden">-------long-------long-------</span>long<span style="visibility:hidden">-------</span>long<span style="visibility:hidden">-------</span>Long<br />
  <line start="1738" end="1740" speaker="homestar">
    long<span style="visibility:hidden">-------</span>long<span style="visibility:hidden">-------long-------</span>long<span style="visibility:hidden">-------</span>long<span style="visibility:hidden">-------</span>Long<br />
  <line start="1740" end="1743" speaker="homestar">
    long<span style="visibility:hidden">-------</span>long<span style="visibility:hidden">-------</span>long<span style="visibility:hidden">-------</span>long<span style="visibility:hidden">-------</span>long<span style="visibility:hidden">-------</span>Long<br />
<line start="1743" end="1749" speaker="homestar">long<span style="visibility:hidden">-------</span>long<span style="visibility:hidden">-------</span>long<span style="visibility:hidden">-------</span>long<span style="visibility:hidden">-------</span>long<span style="visibility:hidden">-------</span>Long<br />pants!</line>
<line start="1749" end="1791" speaker="strongbad">Oight! Ah! That's it! We need to get you some serious clown care, man!</line>
<line start="1793" end="1808" speaker="homestar">But I was told long pants!</line>
<line start="1809" end="1833" speaker="homestar">Long pants! They said long pants!</line>
<line start="1834" end="1846" speaker="homestar">Always long pants!</line>
<line start="1847" end="1856" speaker="homestar">Long, my pants!</line>
<line start="1857" end="1867" speaker="homestar" volume="1.2">Gleaming pants!</line>
<line start="1868" end="1883" speaker="homestar" volume="1.4">Glorious pants!</line>
<line start="1920" end="1945" speaker="strongbad">Bleh! Egh! BLEEEGGEHHEGH!</line>
<line start="1952" end="1955" speaker="thecheat">The Cheat noises</line>
<line start="1955" end="1968">
<thecheat>The Cheat noises</thecheat>
<line start="1976" end="1997" speaker="strongbad">Noice work, Clanky.</line>
<line start="2000" end="2045" speaker="strongbad">You made Homestar go nuts and you've seriously creeped me out.</line>
<line start="2052" end="2083" speaker="strongbad">And how am I supposed to get <em>this</em> crap offa here?</line>
<line start="2088" end="2157" speaker="strongbad" volume="0.8">Stupid... made-up technology... that I made up... paint pen...</line>
<line start="2160" end="2219" speaker="strongbad">The Cheat! Call tech support and tell 'em you broke the Lappy again!</line>
<line start="2221" end="2237" speaker="thepaper">Preeeeeow!</line>
<line start="2245" end="2299" speaker="homestar">Loooonnng paaaannnts!</line>
<line start="2300" end="2349" speaker="marzipan">Awww, there there, Homestar. It's not so bad.</line>
<line start="2349" end="2372" speaker="marzipan">Everybody thinks I'm a broom.</line>
<line start="2375" end="2393" speaker="homestar">You're not a broom?!</line>
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