death metal
From Homestar Runner Wiki
| Strong Bad Email #141 |
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Strong Bad instructs viewers on how to make an awesome death metal song.
Cast (in order of appearance): Strong Bad, Larry Palaroncini, Brainkrieg, Strong Mad, Taranchula, Homestar Runner (Easter egg), What's Her Face (Easter egg), Cheerleader (Easter egg), No "i" in team boy (Easter Egg), A Troll (Easter Egg)
Places: Computer Room, Basement of the Brothers Strong
Computer: Lappy 486
Date: Monday, January 16, 2006
Running Time: 3:48
Page Title: Lappy 486
DVD: strongbad_email.exe Disc Five
Transcript
STRONG BAD: Email, ah ooh, ooh, ooh ah ooh, email. {reading}
subject: death metalDear Strong Bad,
I'm in this death metal band at my school, and I am in need
of some of your expert lyrical advice: what words sound
really cool when you scream 'em at the top of your lungs?
Dane
Corvallis, OR
{He says "Ding dong, string strong, bing bong" instead of "Dear Strong Bad."}
STRONG BAD: {typing} Whoa! You must go to a pretty cool school. Most schools just have a marching band or maybe a jazz ensemble. But a death metal band? That's extracurriculariffic! {clears screen} Now let's see, first, you'd better be ugly, Dane. Or fat. The gift of death metal does not smile on the good looking. If there's any doubt, go ahead and hot-glue some corn flakes to your face. That'll do the trick. Now, I'm no geographist, but I don't think Oregon is anywhere near Scandinavia, which seems to be the only place left where death metal will get you any chicks. {clears screen} As for lyrics, you've got it all wrong! Screaming words at the top of your lungs is for people with blond hair. Ya know, words like 'tonite,' 'wooh-mon,' and the name of any street in L.A. {types "run 'webcam'"} Check it out! {clears screen. A window with a camera shot of Larry Palaroncini pops up.}
LARRY PALARONCINI: {sings the following lines, which appear below the shot under the screen name "ladeezluvlarry71"} tonight! wooh-mon! we'll be drivin' down Sepulveda with the t-top down?
STRONG BAD: {sarcastically} Thanks, Larry.
LARRY PALARONCINI: {the words continue to appear below Larry's image} no prob, Strong Bad. HEY! i'm gonna b online later on playing an MMORPG if you wanna join my guild!
STRONG BAD: Yeah, maybe.
LARRY PALARONCINI: no wait! {the text "you kicked ladeezluvlarry71 offline" appears in red. The window closes.}
STRONG BAD: {typing} So for death metal, you want to scream from the bowels of your lungs. The bowels! Words like, {in a deep, sinister voice, and with the words in green, spooky letters} 'decay,' 'deranged,' 'decrepit,' and um, 'delouse.' In fact, you really can't go wrong with anything that starts with d-e. 'Cept for maybe
{cut to the auditorium from Teen Girl Squad Issue 8, with a singer, bassist, and drummer on stage}
SINGER: Dentist!
BACK-UP: Jugga jigga wugga!
SINGER: Deli-style!
BACK-UP: Jugga jigga wugga!
{cut back to the Lappy}
STRONG BAD: {typing} {in Teen Girl Squad voice} That was Brainkrieg. They got last place. {in normal voice} So let's recap: ugly, Nordic, bowels, d-e words. Now all you gotta do is—
{cut to Strong Mad in the Basement}
STRONG BAD: — hunch all up on yourself, {Strong Mad gets down on his knee} pretend you're holding a mystical orb in each hand {Strong Mad holds out his hands and a circular outline appears in each} and let the evil flow forth.
{The scene darkens. The circular outlines fade away. A drum beat begins.}
STRONG MAD: {bounces up and down} DeVito. DENIRO! DELUISE!! {cut back to the Lappy}
STRONG BAD:
