Editing Homestar Ruiner Responses (House of Strong)
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:'''STRONG BAD:''' Rhino... Rhino Feeder...''{vigorous head shaking noise}'' wuh oh! I was dreaming about... muffins. | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Rhino... Rhino Feeder...''{vigorous head shaking noise}'' wuh oh! I was dreaming about... muffins. | ||
- | :'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{half singing}'' I wake up every morning feeling awesome. Even though I slept on the remote again last night | + | :'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{half singing}'' I wake up every morning feeling awesome. Even though I slept on the remote again last night— ow! ''{kicks The Cheat into the dryer}'' |
:'''THE CHEAT:''' ''{The Cheat noises}'' | :'''THE CHEAT:''' ''{The Cheat noises}'' | ||
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<blockquote class="lappy email"> | <blockquote class="lappy email"> | ||
- | <div> | + | <div>Subject: Beating Homestar?</div> |
- | Dear Strong Bad, I've got a question: | + | Dear Strong Bad, I've got a question: if you hate Homestar<br> |
- | so much, why dont you | + | so much, why dont you beat the snot out of him? Are<br> |
you chicken or something?<br/> | you chicken or something?<br/> | ||
Confused,<br/> | Confused,<br/> | ||
- | + | Ennie M., Frenchtown, CA.<br/> | |
</blockquote> | </blockquote> | ||
:''{reads "dont" as spelled, reads confused as "Con-fussed"''} | :''{reads "dont" as spelled, reads confused as "Con-fussed"''} | ||
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::'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey, it's that infomercial for the Ab-Abber 2000. It claims you can get a 9-pack in less than 40 scribbles a day! | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey, it's that infomercial for the Ab-Abber 2000. It claims you can get a 9-pack in less than 40 scribbles a day! | ||
::{{short hr}} | ::{{short hr}} | ||
- | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey! It's the Laugh Trackalicious Adventures of Guy and Girlfriend! Oh, this is the one where Guy thinks he kills Girlfriend's hamster and tries to replace it with another hamster but the first hamster had been dead all along so Girlfriend thinks it came back to life and then the hilarity | + | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey! It's the Laugh Trackalicious Adventures of Guy and Girlfriend! Oh, this is the one where Guy thinks he kills Girlfriend's hamster and tries to replace it with another hamster but the first hamster had been dead all along so Girlfriend thinks it came back to life and then the hilarity— and the humor— and the original comedy television writing! |
- | :'''When Homestar is present' | + | :'''When Homestar is present, first time''' |
- | + | ||
::'''STRONG BAD:''' Time for a few hours of retina frying entertainment! | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' Time for a few hours of retina frying entertainment! | ||
- | ::'''HOMESTAR | + | ::'''HOMESTAR:''' Don't touch that dial! |
::'''STRONG BAD:''' Why not? | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' Why not? | ||
- | ::'''HOMESTAR | + | ::'''HOMESTAR:''' Look! |
::'''TELEVISION ANNOUNCER:''' Have you seen this, um, man? He was last seen streaking out of Coach Z's locker room, naked as the day he was born. | ::'''TELEVISION ANNOUNCER:''' Have you seen this, um, man? He was last seen streaking out of Coach Z's locker room, naked as the day he was born. | ||
::'''COACH Z:''' ''{on television}'' It all happened so fast... one minute I was definitely not just standing around by myself, and the next thing I knew there was this high-pitched scream! | ::'''COACH Z:''' ''{on television}'' It all happened so fast... one minute I was definitely not just standing around by myself, and the next thing I knew there was this high-pitched scream! | ||
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::'''TELEVISION ANNOUNCER:''' The King of Town has issued an all-points bulletin for the mysterious nudenik, and sealed the negatives of this incriminating security photo in his castle's Hall of Records for further study. | ::'''TELEVISION ANNOUNCER:''' The King of Town has issued an all-points bulletin for the mysterious nudenik, and sealed the negatives of this incriminating security photo in his castle's Hall of Records for further study. | ||
::'''KING OF TOWN:''' Studying is fun! | ::'''KING OF TOWN:''' Studying is fun! | ||
- | ::'''TELEVISION ANNOUNCER:''' In the meantime | + | ::'''TELEVISION ANNOUNCER:''' In the meantime— ''{Homestar and Strong Bad talk over him}'' if you happen to come across this lewd, nude dude, do not, we repeat, do not approach him, as he may be armed and dangerous. Okay. Maybe not armed. |
- | ::'''HOMESTAR | + | ::'''HOMESTAR:''' See? I'll never be able to show my face in public as long as I've got a criminal record at the King of Town's Hall of Records! |
::'''STRONG BAD:''' Actually, I don't think it's your face you should be worried about showing. | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' Actually, I don't think it's your face you should be worried about showing. | ||
- | ::'''HOMESTAR | + | ::'''HOMESTAR:''' Oh, you mean my feet? Yeah, they are pretty big. |
- | : | + | :'''When Homestar is present, each time thereafter''' |
- | ::'''HOMESTAR | + | ::'''HOMESTAR:''' Don't change the channel! I'm tracking the progress of my very own personal pan-nationwide manhunt! |
::'''STRONG BAD:''' More like nationwide '''''GET OFF MY COUCH!''''' | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' More like nationwide '''''GET OFF MY COUCH!''''' | ||
- | ::'''HOMESTAR | + | ::'''HOMESTAR:''' Yeah, no. |
- | + | ||
- | + | ||
- | + | ||
:'''During Party''' | :'''During Party''' | ||
::'''STRONG BAD:''' I'll never be able to get back to watching scrambled premium cable until I get these annoying party people out of here. | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' I'll never be able to get back to watching scrambled premium cable until I get these annoying party people out of here. | ||
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==== Criminal Record → Homestar ==== | ==== Criminal Record → Homestar ==== | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey, take a look at this! | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey, take a look at this! | ||
- | :'''HOMESTAR | + | :'''HOMESTAR:''' What is it? |
:'''STRONG BAD:''' It's the one and only copy of your criminal record, stolen by awesome Strong Bad out from under the King of Town's butter stained nose. | :'''STRONG BAD:''' It's the one and only copy of your criminal record, stolen by awesome Strong Bad out from under the King of Town's butter stained nose. | ||
- | :'''HOMESTAR | + | :'''HOMESTAR:''' I don't believe it! Awesome Strong Bad could never pull that off! |
:'''STRONG BAD:''' If you don't believe me, then believe the all-knowing wisdom of local television news! ''{turns to watch the television}'' | :'''STRONG BAD:''' If you don't believe me, then believe the all-knowing wisdom of local television news! ''{turns to watch the television}'' | ||
- | :'''NEWS ANCHOR:''' | + | :'''NEWS ANCHOR:''' —cats wearing clown costumes really ''do'' make a difference. Thanks for that important story, Mindi. In other news, citizens were shocked today when the King of Town's Hall of Records was brazenly burglarized by an unknown masked assailant. |
:'''THE KING OF TOWN:''' ''{on television}'' He took everything! Everything! Cleaned the place out! | :'''THE KING OF TOWN:''' ''{on television}'' He took everything! Everything! Cleaned the place out! | ||
:'''NEWS ANCHOR:''' Without the criminal records, the King admits that he has no institutional memory of any crimes being committed... anywhere... ever. | :'''NEWS ANCHOR:''' Without the criminal records, the King admits that he has no institutional memory of any crimes being committed... anywhere... ever. | ||
- | :'''HOMESTAR | + | :'''HOMESTAR:''' Yay! I'm free to show my face in in public again! And maybe the rest of me too! |
:'''STRONG BAD:''' You nasty. ''{Homestar leaves}'' Finally, the TV belongs to its one true master again! | :'''STRONG BAD:''' You nasty. ''{Homestar leaves}'' Finally, the TV belongs to its one true master again! | ||
====Homestar → Television==== | ====Homestar → Television==== | ||
- | :''First time only'' | + | :''{First time only}'' |
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Can we watch something a little less... yokel than local news? | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Can we watch something a little less... yokel than local news? | ||
- | :'''HOMESTAR | + | :'''HOMESTAR:''' No way, man! I need to keep up-to-date on all the details of my scandalous downfall and nationwide manhunt! |
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Dude, it's a public nudity charge. I've done more scandalous things while buying a pair of brown and tan socks. | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Dude, it's a public nudity charge. I've done more scandalous things while buying a pair of brown and tan socks. | ||
- | :'''HOMESTAR | + | :'''HOMESTAR:''' Look, there I am again! Oh the shame! |
:{{short hr}} | :{{short hr}} | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' So, just to be sure, there's no way I'm gonna talk you off of this couch, right? | :'''STRONG BAD:''' So, just to be sure, there's no way I'm gonna talk you off of this couch, right? | ||
- | :'''HOMESTAR | + | :'''HOMESTAR:''' Not until I'm no longer a wanted criminal. |
== Computer Room == | == Computer Room == | ||
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:'''STRONG BAD:''' Ah, my trusty steed. Stooly, I'd ride you into email battle any day. | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Ah, my trusty steed. Stooly, I'd ride you into email battle any day. | ||
=== Calendar === | === Calendar === | ||
- | :''' | + | :'''Start of game''' |
::'''STRONG BAD:''' Today's the day I finally give Homestar his long overdue pummeling. | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' Today's the day I finally give Homestar his long overdue pummeling. | ||
:'''After visiting the Track for the first time''' | :'''After visiting the Track for the first time''' | ||
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:'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{Strong Bad turns the lights off, and then back on}'' Intriguing. | :'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{Strong Bad turns the lights off, and then back on}'' Intriguing. | ||
:{{short hr}} | :{{short hr}} | ||
- | :'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{Strong Bad turns the lights off, and then back on}'' Not so | + | :'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{Strong Bad turns the lights off, and then back on}'' Not so intruguing. |
=== Rave Switch === | === Rave Switch === | ||
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==Homestar Runner== | ==Homestar Runner== | ||
- | |||
===Homestar → Homestar=== | ===Homestar → Homestar=== | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' All right, Homestar, it's time for you to go. There's no room in the House of Strong for crybabies. | :'''STRONG BAD:''' All right, Homestar, it's time for you to go. There's no room in the House of Strong for crybabies. | ||
- | :'''HOMESTAR | + | :'''HOMESTAR:''' What about Strong Sad? |
:'''STRONG SAD:''' I'm not a crybaby, I'm tormented! | :'''STRONG SAD:''' I'm not a crybaby, I'm tormented! | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Okay, there's room for ''one'' crybaby in the House of Strong, and that position's been filled. Out you go! | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Okay, there's room for ''one'' crybaby in the House of Strong, and that position's been filled. Out you go! | ||
- | :'''HOMESTAR | + | :'''HOMESTAR:''' No way. I'm not leaving until my life is back to the wonderful way it used to be. |
:{{short hr}} | :{{short hr}} | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Guess what, Homestar! Everything's all better again! | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Guess what, Homestar! Everything's all better again! | ||
- | :'''HOMESTAR | + | :'''HOMESTAR:''' Prove it. |
=== When all Homestars have left the building === | === When all Homestars have left the building === | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey, do you hear that? That, my hot ladies, was the sweet sound of Homestar's tuchus being surgically removed from my house. Ya hear that, house? It's just you and me. | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey, do you hear that? That, my hot ladies, was the sweet sound of Homestar's tuchus being surgically removed from my house. Ya hear that, house? It's just you and me. | ||
:''{clock wipe to computer room, Strong Bad is sitting at the Lappy}'' | :''{clock wipe to computer room, Strong Bad is sitting at the Lappy}'' | ||
- | :'''STRONG BAD:''' So there you have it, Monsieur Manure: the video ga | + | :'''STRONG BAD:''' So there you have it, Monsieur Manure: the video ga— |
:'''PARTY GOERS:''' Surprise! | :'''PARTY GOERS:''' Surprise! | ||
- | :'''STRONG BAD:''' What the | + | :'''STRONG BAD:''' What the—? |
:''{cut to downstairs, pan across to kitchen showing Marzipan, Homestar, Coach Z, Bubs and The King of Town}'' | :''{cut to downstairs, pan across to kitchen showing Marzipan, Homestar, Coach Z, Bubs and The King of Town}'' | ||
:'''PARTY GOERS:''' Whoopie! ''{singing, out of sync and tune with each other}'' For he's a jolly good fellow, which nobody can deny! | :'''PARTY GOERS:''' Whoopie! ''{singing, out of sync and tune with each other}'' For he's a jolly good fellow, which nobody can deny! | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{coming downstairs}'' I'll deny you oxygen to your lungs if you don't get outta here! | :'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{coming downstairs}'' I'll deny you oxygen to your lungs if you don't get outta here! | ||
===When Strong Bad walks near=== | ===When Strong Bad walks near=== | ||
- | :'''HOMESTAR | + | :'''HOMESTAR:''' Oh the pain... |
:{{short hr}} | :{{short hr}} | ||
- | :'''HOMESTAR | + | :'''HOMESTAR:''' Does despair have one ''G'', or two? |
:{{short hr}} | :{{short hr}} | ||
- | :'''HOMESTAR | + | :'''HOMESTAR:''' Oh hi Strong Bad... ''{sighs}'' |
:{{short hr}} | :{{short hr}} | ||
- | :'''HOMESTAR | + | :'''HOMESTAR:''' ''{sighs}'' |
+ | |||
+ | |||
==Kitchen== | ==Kitchen== | ||
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=== Bubs === | === Bubs === | ||
+ | :'''Only during party''' | ||
==== Bubs → Bubs ==== | ==== Bubs → Bubs ==== | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Wait a minute, if you're here, who's minding the concession stand? | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Wait a minute, if you're here, who's minding the concession stand? | ||
:'''BUBS:''' Oh, I got that covered. | :'''BUBS:''' Oh, I got that covered. | ||
- | :''{cut to the | + | :''{cut to the concession stand, The Poopsmith inside}'' |
:'''THE POOPSMITH:''' ''{holds up a sign reading ''Half off all Whatsit!''}'' | :'''THE POOPSMITH:''' ''{holds up a sign reading ''Half off all Whatsit!''}'' | ||
:''{Strong Bad shakes his head}'' | :''{Strong Bad shakes his head}'' | ||
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::'''BUBS:''' I'm just too naturally Bubsly to dance like that. | ::'''BUBS:''' I'm just too naturally Bubsly to dance like that. | ||
:'''While ''Coach Z's demo'' is playing''' | :'''While ''Coach Z's demo'' is playing''' | ||
- | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey | + | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey— |
::'''BUBS:''' Can't talk now, everybaddy! I'm doin' the broken robot! ''{robotically}'' Malfunction! Vort! Vort! Vort! Vort! | ::'''BUBS:''' Can't talk now, everybaddy! I'm doin' the broken robot! ''{robotically}'' Malfunction! Vort! Vort! Vort! Vort! | ||
:'''While ''Jane's Austentacious Chamber Music Jam'' is playing ''' | :'''While ''Jane's Austentacious Chamber Music Jam'' is playing ''' | ||
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:'''STRONG BAD:''' '''''Get out!''''' | :'''STRONG BAD:''' '''''Get out!''''' | ||
:'''BUBS:''' Mmmmm... nope. | :'''BUBS:''' Mmmmm... nope. | ||
+ | |||
+ | === Candy → Homestar === | ||
+ | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey mopedog! | ||
+ | :'''HOMESTAR:''' What? | ||
+ | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Have some candy! | ||
+ | :'''HOMESTAR:''' Ewww, packing peanuts! That sounds like something Marzipan would like! ''{sighs}'' Marzipan... | ||
+ | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Great, now he's sighing. | ||
+ | |||
+ | === Cell Phone → Homestar === | ||
+ | :'''After having successfully left the Candy for Marzipan''' | ||
+ | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey Homestar! Look who found your cell phone! | ||
+ | :'''HOMESTAR:''' What would I want with a phone? It's not like anyone will ever call me again. | ||
+ | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Anyone? Not even ''{dials voicemail}'' Marzipan? | ||
+ | :'''MARZIPAN:''' ''{recording on phone}'' Homestar? It's Marzipan. I want you to know that while I'm still a little bit sore ''{Homestar saddens more}'' that you burned down most of my backyard, I've accepted your chocolate apology, ''{Homestar brightens}'' and am prepared to be your girlfriend again. Good bye! | ||
+ | :'''HOMESTAR:''' The candy worked? Hooray! Waitaminute... when did I give her candy? | ||
+ | :'''STRONG BAD:''' You don't remember? You sent me over to her house a few hours ago with a big box of chocolate-covered organic packing peanuts. | ||
+ | :'''HOMESTAR:''' Oh yeah, that ''sounds'' like something I'd do. So what am I doing in your kitchen now with all this cooking stuff? | ||
+ | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Beats the crap outta me. | ||
+ | :'''HOMESTAR:''' Well, I'll just go then. | ||
+ | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Yes please. ''{Homestar leaves}'' At last, the kitchen and all its four year old condiments are mine again! Bwah-hah-ha-haaa! | ||
=== Chef's Hat === | === Chef's Hat === | ||
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===Dead Plant=== | ===Dead Plant=== | ||
- | :'' | + | :''{first time}'' |
:'''STRONG BAD:''' This is Charlemagne, Strong Sad's plant. It used to be healthy, but after Strong Sad started talking to it, it decided to kill itself! | :'''STRONG BAD:''' This is Charlemagne, Strong Sad's plant. It used to be healthy, but after Strong Sad started talking to it, it decided to kill itself! | ||
:'''STRONG SAD:''' That's not true! | :'''STRONG SAD:''' That's not true! | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' That's not what the note said! | :'''STRONG BAD:''' That's not what the note said! | ||
:{{short hr}} | :{{short hr}} | ||
+ | :''{each time thereafter}'' | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' It's Strong Sad's suicidal plant. | :'''STRONG BAD:''' It's Strong Sad's suicidal plant. | ||
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::{{short hr}} | ::{{short hr}} | ||
::'''STRONG BAD:''' Eww, that mayonnaise is so ancient, its expiration date is chiseled on a stone tablet. | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' Eww, that mayonnaise is so ancient, its expiration date is chiseled on a stone tablet. | ||
+ | ::{{short hr}} | ||
+ | ::''{not at start of game}'' | ||
+ | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' I think they say that once it turns a light grey, it's safe to eat again. | ||
+ | |||
:'''Only while Homestar is in the kitchen''' | :'''Only while Homestar is in the kitchen''' | ||
::'''STRONG BAD:''' What happened to all the food? | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' What happened to all the food? | ||
- | ::'''HOMESTAR | + | ::'''HOMESTAR:''' What food? The fridge was empty when I got here! |
::'''STRONG BAD:''' Oh. Yeah. | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' Oh. Yeah. | ||
::{{short hr}} | ::{{short hr}} | ||
::'''STRONG BAD:''' You know, you plan on staying here, you'll have to take your turn stocking the fridge. | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' You know, you plan on staying here, you'll have to take your turn stocking the fridge. | ||
- | ::'''HOMESTAR | + | ::'''HOMESTAR:''' No problem, old chum! Whose turn is it now? |
::'''STRONG SAD:''' Strong Bad's! | ::'''STRONG SAD:''' Strong Bad's! | ||
::'''STRONG BAD:''' You shut up! | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' You shut up! | ||
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::'''STRONG BAD:''' Peanut Extract Cola, Eggplant Fritters, Frozen Double Vegan Sundaes... Yeah, this is a Marziparty all right. | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' Peanut Extract Cola, Eggplant Fritters, Frozen Double Vegan Sundaes... Yeah, this is a Marziparty all right. | ||
- | |||
- | |||
=== Fruit & Veggies Pizza === | === Fruit & Veggies Pizza === | ||
+ | :'''Only during party''' | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Normally, I'd be pouncing on these pizzas like The Cheat on a wounded Twinkie, but I draw the line at veggie pizzas. Especially veggie pizzas with olives and extra King of Town slobber. | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Normally, I'd be pouncing on these pizzas like The Cheat on a wounded Twinkie, but I draw the line at veggie pizzas. Especially veggie pizzas with olives and extra King of Town slobber. | ||
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=== Jela-ton™ === | === Jela-ton™ === | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey now, what's this? ''{Strong Bad takes and reads note from crate}'' | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey now, what's this? ''{Strong Bad takes and reads note from crate}'' | ||
:'''COACH Z:''' ''{voiceover}'' Dear Homestar, even though you thoroughly disgraced yourself at the Race to the End of the Race, rules are rules. Please enjoy this lifetime supply of Fluffy-Puff Jela-Ton™, the official second place prize of the F-C-U-T-R-E-R. Yours truly, Coach Z. PS Never show your giant face around my track ever again! | :'''COACH Z:''' ''{voiceover}'' Dear Homestar, even though you thoroughly disgraced yourself at the Race to the End of the Race, rules are rules. Please enjoy this lifetime supply of Fluffy-Puff Jela-Ton™, the official second place prize of the F-C-U-T-R-E-R. Yours truly, Coach Z. PS Never show your giant face around my track ever again! | ||
- | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Hmm. Homestar'll probably feel a lot better if I get rid of this unpleasant reminder of his humiliating defeat. I know ''I'll'' feel a lot better | + | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Hmm. Homestar'll probably feel a lot better if I get rid of this unpleasant reminder of his humiliating defeat. I know ''I'll'' feel a lot better — I ''love'' Jela-Ton. |
=== The King of Town === | === The King of Town === | ||
+ | :'''Only during party''' | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey! | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey! | ||
:'''THE KING OF TOWN:''' ''{eating noises}'' | :'''THE KING OF TOWN:''' ''{eating noises}'' | ||
Line 300: | Line 280: | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey there! | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey there! | ||
:'''THE KING OF TOWN:''' ''{eating noises}'' | :'''THE KING OF TOWN:''' ''{eating noises}'' | ||
+ | |||
+ | === Homestar → Chef's Hat === | ||
+ | :''{first time}'' | ||
+ | :'''STRONG BAD:''' What's with all the cooking? | ||
+ | :'''HOMESTAR:''' The Cheat told me that the way to a woman's heart is through her stomach, so I'm endeavoring to prepare a scrumptious confection to win back Marzipan's a-love. | ||
+ | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Sounds like a plan. How's it going? | ||
+ | :'''HOMESTAR:''' Not so good. Marzipan's vegan and most of the food in here contains meat, milk, milky meat, or ...meaty milk? | ||
+ | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey, don't be dissin' my meaty milk! | ||
+ | :{{short hr}} | ||
+ | :''{each time thereafter}'' | ||
+ | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Any closer to finishing off that make-up candy for Marzipan? | ||
+ | :'''HOMESTAR:''' No. I'm starting to think it's all hopeless. | ||
+ | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Hmm, maybe Dr. Strong Bad can write a prescription to cure Homestar's broken heart. A candy prescription. For Marzipan. To eat. | ||
===Microwave=== | ===Microwave=== | ||
Line 305: | Line 298: | ||
===Outside=== | ===Outside=== | ||
- | : | + | :''During the party only. The same response is received if attempting to leave the area via the map.'' |
:'''STRONG BAD:''' No way, man. I'm not going anywhere until I've kicked everyone whose name doesn't begin with "Strong" out of my house! Except The Cheat. I'm just gonna kick him. | :'''STRONG BAD:''' No way, man. I'm not going anywhere until I've kicked everyone whose name doesn't begin with "Strong" out of my house! Except The Cheat. I'm just gonna kick him. | ||
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==Laundry Room== | ==Laundry Room== | ||
- | ===Washer | + | ===Washer/Dryer=== |
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Only Strong Sad seems to know the secrets to these mysterious mechanical devices. | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Only Strong Sad seems to know the secrets to these mysterious mechanical devices. | ||
- | |||
- | |||
- | |||
- | |||
===The Cheat=== | ===The Cheat=== | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey! Look at that thing, over there. | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey! Look at that thing, over there. | ||
:'''THE CHEAT:''' Mehr me meh me? <!-- nb. in-game subtitles --> | :'''THE CHEAT:''' Mehr me meh me? <!-- nb. in-game subtitles --> | ||
+ | :''{Strong Bad kicks The Cheat into the dryer}'' | ||
:{{short hr}} | :{{short hr}} | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Holy pixelated Trogdor, what's that? | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Holy pixelated Trogdor, what's that? | ||
Line 327: | Line 317: | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey, turn around. | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey, turn around. | ||
:'''THE CHEAT:''' Wii? <!-- nb. in-game subtitles --> | :'''THE CHEAT:''' Wii? <!-- nb. in-game subtitles --> | ||
- | + | ||
- | :'' | + | ===Dryer with The Cheat Inside=== |
+ | :'''STRONG BAD:''' How you doing in there, The Cheat? | ||
+ | :'''THE CHEAT:''' Me-mehr mimimi me mehr mer, me meh! <!-- nb. in-game subtitles --> | ||
+ | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey! Do you kiss your hot mom with that mouth?!? | ||
===Pennants=== | ===Pennants=== | ||
Line 340: | Line 333: | ||
::'''STRONG BAD:''' You know, this is a really dangerous idea. Someone could trip on this poorly-placed banana peel and go flying right out the window. Yup, sure is dangeous... | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' You know, this is a really dangerous idea. Someone could trip on this poorly-placed banana peel and go flying right out the window. Yup, sure is dangeous... | ||
::''{each steps on the banana peel in turn, not slipping}'' | ::''{each steps on the banana peel in turn, not slipping}'' | ||
- | ::'''HOMESTAR | + | ::'''HOMESTAR:''' Whoops! |
::'''MARZIPAN:''' Whooo! | ::'''MARZIPAN:''' Whooo! | ||
::'''BUBS:''' Heeey! | ::'''BUBS:''' Heeey! | ||
Line 355: | Line 348: | ||
::'''BUBS:''' Heeey! | ::'''BUBS:''' Heeey! | ||
::'''MARZIPAN:''' Whooo! | ::'''MARZIPAN:''' Whooo! | ||
- | ::'''HOMESTAR | + | ::'''HOMESTAR:''' Whoops! ''{inadvertantly flings the banana peel, which lands on Strong Bad}'' |
::'''STRONG BAD:''' Arrg! | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' Arrg! | ||
Line 362: | Line 355: | ||
::'''STRONG BAD:''' I love the way I think! | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' I love the way I think! | ||
::''{each slips on the banana peel in turn at falls out the window}'' | ::''{each slips on the banana peel in turn at falls out the window}'' | ||
- | ::'''HOMESTAR | + | ::'''HOMESTAR:''' Whoa! |
::'''MARZIPAN:''' Wh-Whoa! | ::'''MARZIPAN:''' Wh-Whoa! | ||
- | ::'''BUBS:''' Hey | + | ::'''BUBS:''' Hey— awesome! |
::'''COACH Z:''' What the-?! I regret everything! | ::'''COACH Z:''' What the-?! I regret everything! | ||
::'''THE KING OF TOWN:''' Oh, look! A banana! Peeeel! | ::'''THE KING OF TOWN:''' Oh, look! A banana! Peeeel! | ||
::''{The King makes a heavier thud than the others when they fall. All are heard groaning}'' | ::''{The King makes a heavier thud than the others when they fall. All are heard groaning}'' | ||
::''{Strong Bad turns off the See Dee Spinner}'' | ::''{Strong Bad turns off the See Dee Spinner}'' | ||
- | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' That's what happens when you mess with General Flexmypecs! Tha | + | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' That's what happens when you mess with General Flexmypecs! Tha—That's me. I sometimes call myself General William Flexmypecs. Now maybe I can get some freakin' piece of quiet around here... |
- | ::'''HOMESTAR | + | ::'''HOMESTAR:''' ''{off screen}'' Ow, my snot! |
::''{cut to the epilogue}'' | ::''{cut to the epilogue}'' | ||
=== Coach Z === | === Coach Z === | ||
+ | :'''Only during party''' | ||
:'''While ''The Best of Brit-Pout, the Nineties Years'' is playing''' | :'''While ''The Best of Brit-Pout, the Nineties Years'' is playing''' | ||
::'''COACH Z:''' This music really captures the dark empty abyss in my soul! | ::'''COACH Z:''' This music really captures the dark empty abyss in my soul! | ||
:'''While ''Coach Z's demo'' is playing''' | :'''While ''Coach Z's demo'' is playing''' | ||
- | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey | + | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey— |
::'''COACH Z:''' Hey, ho! One, two three. I got this party mad jumpin' cuz I'm Coach Z! | ::'''COACH Z:''' Hey, ho! One, two three. I got this party mad jumpin' cuz I'm Coach Z! | ||
::'''STRONG BAD:''' Stop it. | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' Stop it. | ||
Line 422: | Line 416: | ||
:'''COACH Z:''' Nope. | :'''COACH Z:''' Nope. | ||
- | === Conga Line === | + | ==== Conga Line ==== |
- | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey | + | :'''Only during party''' |
+ | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey— | ||
:'''MARZIPAN:''' Whoo hoo! | :'''MARZIPAN:''' Whoo hoo! | ||
- | :'''HOMESTAR | + | :'''HOMESTAR:''' Choo choo! |
=== Marzipan & Homestar === | === Marzipan & Homestar === | ||
+ | :'''Only during Party''' | ||
+ | |||
:'''If wearing Homestar disguise''' | :'''If wearing Homestar disguise''' | ||
- | |||
::'''STRONG BAD:''' Oh, hewwo, Marzipan. | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' Oh, hewwo, Marzipan. | ||
::'''MARZIPAN:''' Hello Strong Bad. | ::'''MARZIPAN:''' Hello Strong Bad. | ||
::'''STRONG BAD:''' What? How did you know it was me?! | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' What? How did you know it was me?! | ||
::'''MARZIPAN:''' Well, you nearly had me fooled, but then I remembered that the real Homestar is standing right next to me! | ::'''MARZIPAN:''' Well, you nearly had me fooled, but then I remembered that the real Homestar is standing right next to me! | ||
- | ::'''HOMESTAR | + | ::'''HOMESTAR:''' Yeah, he is! |
- | + | ||
- | + | ||
- | + | ||
- | + | ||
- | + | ||
:'''While ''The Best of Brit-Pout, the Nineties Years'' is playing, both speak slowly and sadly''' | :'''While ''The Best of Brit-Pout, the Nineties Years'' is playing, both speak slowly and sadly''' | ||
::'''MARZIPAN:''' I'm too depressed to talk... | ::'''MARZIPAN:''' I'm too depressed to talk... | ||
- | ::'''HOMESTAR | + | ::'''HOMESTAR:''' Yeah, me too. I just can't stop gazing at my shoes. |
::'''MARZIPAN:''' I wish my hair was black. | ::'''MARZIPAN:''' I wish my hair was black. | ||
:'''While ''Coach Z's demo'' is playing''' | :'''While ''Coach Z's demo'' is playing''' | ||
::'''MARZIPAN:''' ''{crossly}'' Hip-hop objectifies women. | ::'''MARZIPAN:''' ''{crossly}'' Hip-hop objectifies women. | ||
- | ::'''HOMESTAR | + | ::'''HOMESTAR:''' ''{breakdancing}'' Word. |
:'''While ''Jane's Austentacious Chamber Music Jam'' is playing ''' | :'''While ''Jane's Austentacious Chamber Music Jam'' is playing ''' | ||
- | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey | + | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey— |
::'''MARZIPAN:''' I do believe that dreary Mr. Bad is attempting to interrupt our dance, Mr. Homestar. | ::'''MARZIPAN:''' I do believe that dreary Mr. Bad is attempting to interrupt our dance, Mr. Homestar. | ||
- | ::'''HOMESTAR | + | ::'''HOMESTAR:''' I should say, what an appalling breach of common civility. |
::'''MARZIPAN:''' I concur. | ::'''MARZIPAN:''' I concur. | ||
Line 459: | Line 450: | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' I thought the Homestar Victory Party supposed to be in your backyard? | :'''STRONG BAD:''' I thought the Homestar Victory Party supposed to be in your backyard? | ||
:'''MARZIPAN:''' It was, but then some not-very-nice person torched most of my very nice decorations. | :'''MARZIPAN:''' It was, but then some not-very-nice person torched most of my very nice decorations. | ||
- | :'''HOMESTAR | + | :'''HOMESTAR:''' Booooo! |
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Oh yeah. Sorry 'bout that. It was for the greater good. The greatest good, in fact. You know, mine. | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Oh yeah. Sorry 'bout that. It was for the greater good. The greatest good, in fact. You know, mine. | ||
:{{short hr}} | :{{short hr}} | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' What would it take to get you to move this dorkfest someplace that isn't my house? | :'''STRONG BAD:''' What would it take to get you to move this dorkfest someplace that isn't my house? | ||
- | :'''HOMESTAR | + | :'''HOMESTAR:''' Twenty-three dollars. |
:'''MARZIPAN:''' We're not going anywhere until we've sufficiently busted moves and/or grooves! | :'''MARZIPAN:''' We're not going anywhere until we've sufficiently busted moves and/or grooves! | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Hmm, that's not good. It usually takes Marzipan at least eight hours to fully bust moves, and as for Homestar... | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Hmm, that's not good. It usually takes Marzipan at least eight hours to fully bust moves, and as for Homestar... | ||
- | :'''HOMESTAR | + | :'''HOMESTAR:''' Shake it loose, shake it tight, gimme the juice, it's Saturday night! |
:'''STRONG BAD:''' He's busting something, all right. Or maybe he's just plain busted. | :'''STRONG BAD:''' He's busting something, all right. Or maybe he's just plain busted. | ||
:{{short hr}} | :{{short hr}} | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' '''''GET OUT!''''' | :'''STRONG BAD:''' '''''GET OUT!''''' | ||
- | :'''HOMESTAR | + | :'''HOMESTAR:''' No way, man. I gotta keep shakin' this here thang. |
==== Marzipan & Homestar → Trophy ==== | ==== Marzipan & Homestar → Trophy ==== | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' You know, Homestar didn't ''really'' win the ''{fanfare}'' Race to the End of the Race. | :'''STRONG BAD:''' You know, Homestar didn't ''really'' win the ''{fanfare}'' Race to the End of the Race. | ||
- | :'''HOMESTAR | + | :'''HOMESTAR:''' I didn't? |
:'''STRONG BAD:''' No! It was me, in a totally-not-the-head-from-Marzipan's-float Homestar mask! | :'''STRONG BAD:''' No! It was me, in a totally-not-the-head-from-Marzipan's-float Homestar mask! | ||
- | :'''HOMESTAR | + | :'''HOMESTAR:''' Bwhaa-ha-ha-ha. |
:'''MARZIPAN:''' Hee hee hee! | :'''MARZIPAN:''' Hee hee hee! | ||
- | :'''HOMESTAR | + | :'''HOMESTAR:''' Oh, that's rich, Strong Bad. |
:{{short hr}} | :{{short hr}} | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' No, really! It was me all along! | :'''STRONG BAD:''' No, really! It was me all along! | ||
Line 483: | Line 474: | ||
===Melonade=== | ===Melonade=== | ||
- | :'''STRONG BAD:''' You've gotta see it when Strong Mad shotguns one of these things. | + | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' You've gotta see it when Strong Mad shotguns one of these things. |
:'''During the party''' | :'''During the party''' | ||
::'''STRONG BAD:''' Strong Mad's gonna be seriously miffed off when he finds out they've tapped his melonade keg! | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' Strong Mad's gonna be seriously miffed off when he finds out they've tapped his melonade keg! | ||
Line 489: | Line 480: | ||
===See Dee Spinner=== | ===See Dee Spinner=== | ||
:'''Before party''' | :'''Before party''' | ||
- | ::''{ | + | ::''{music playing}'' |
::'''STRONG BAD:''' Let's see what's in the ol' See Dee Spinner. ''{changes music}'' Uh. It's Strong Sad's copy of ''The Best of Brit-Pout, the Nineties Years.'' | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' Let's see what's in the ol' See Dee Spinner. ''{changes music}'' Uh. It's Strong Sad's copy of ''The Best of Brit-Pout, the Nineties Years.'' | ||
::{{short hr}} | ::{{short hr}} | ||
::'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{changes music}'' Sounds like Coach Z has forced another one of his demos unto the world. | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{changes music}'' Sounds like Coach Z has forced another one of his demos unto the world. | ||
::{{short hr}} | ::{{short hr}} | ||
- | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' I've had just about enough of that. Let's see what else is in there | + | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' I've had just about enough of that. Let's see what else is in there— ''{changes music}'' Oh joy, it's that copy of ''Jane's Austentacious Chamber Music Jam.'' I'd like to use this CD as a chamber ''pot''. |
::'''STRONG MAD:''' MISTER DARCY!!! ''{sniff}'' | ::'''STRONG MAD:''' MISTER DARCY!!! ''{sniff}'' | ||
::{{short hr}} | ::{{short hr}} | ||
Line 500: | Line 491: | ||
::{{short hr}} | ::{{short hr}} | ||
::'''STRONG BAD:''' Enough with the music already! ''{changes back to original music}'' | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' Enough with the music already! ''{changes back to original music}'' | ||
- | :'''During Party | + | :'''During Party''' |
- | ::'''HOMESTAR | + | ::''When switching to ''The Cheat's Assorted Latin Rhythms''.'' |
- | ::''{ | + | ::'''HOMESTAR:''' All right! Conga line everybody! Adoot-doot-doot doot-doot doo-''doo''! |
+ | ::''{party goers form a conga line}'' | ||
===Smoke Detector=== | ===Smoke Detector=== | ||
Line 508: | Line 500: | ||
===Window=== | ===Window=== | ||
- | |||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Sometimes I like to stand in front of my window and start flexing in case a girls' volleyball team is walking by. | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Sometimes I like to stand in front of my window and start flexing in case a girls' volleyball team is walking by. | ||
- | : | + | :{{short hr}} |
:'''STRONG BAD:''' I know it's hard to tell from this angle, but the view from here is awesome! | :'''STRONG BAD:''' I know it's hard to tell from this angle, but the view from here is awesome! | ||
- | : | + | :{{short hr}} |
:'''STRONG BAD:''' You wouldn't think, since we're on the first floor and everything, but the drop-off from this window's like, 20 feet or something. | :'''STRONG BAD:''' You wouldn't think, since we're on the first floor and everything, but the drop-off from this window's like, 20 feet or something. | ||
Line 527: | Line 518: | ||
===Plaque (horse)=== | ===Plaque (horse)=== | ||
- | :'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{reading plaque}'' "The loneliest goat sees the last sunset last" | + | :'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{reading plaque}'' "The loneliest goat sees the last sunset last" — that's a horse. |
===Plaque (dog)=== | ===Plaque (dog)=== | ||
Line 536: | Line 527: | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Checkin' my snail mail, checkin' my snail mail! Hmmm, what's this? ''{finds a ski cap}'' I'm ready for the big heist! Those smoky red laser beams don't stand a chance when I'm in this get up! | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Checkin' my snail mail, checkin' my snail mail! Hmmm, what's this? ''{finds a ski cap}'' I'm ready for the big heist! Those smoky red laser beams don't stand a chance when I'm in this get up! | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Hmm, I think I'll put it in my fancy schmancy transdimensional photo-booth wardrobe. | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Hmm, I think I'll put it in my fancy schmancy transdimensional photo-booth wardrobe. | ||
- | + | ||
- | + | ===Mail Box (empty)=== | |
+ | :'''STRONG BAD:''' It's empty now. On account of all the emptyin' I did earlier. | ||
===Pile of Dirt=== | ===Pile of Dirt=== | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Oh nophers, we've got gophers. | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Oh nophers, we've got gophers. | ||
- | :'''STRONG SAD:''' ''{pops out of the bushes}'' Actually, true gopher holes are more elliptical in nature, and | + | :'''STRONG SAD:''' ''{pops out of the bushes}'' Actually, true gopher holes are more elliptical in nature, and— |
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Yeah, it's gophers... | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Yeah, it's gophers... | ||
:'''STRONG SAD:''' (Sigh)... ''{leaves scene}'' | :'''STRONG SAD:''' (Sigh)... ''{leaves scene}'' | ||
===Treasure Marker=== | ===Treasure Marker=== | ||
+ | ====Treasure Marker==== | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Whoa, there's buried treasure just outside my front door! I hope it's a bubblin' crude. | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Whoa, there's buried treasure just outside my front door! I hope it's a bubblin' crude. | ||
====Shovel → Treasure Marker==== | ====Shovel → Treasure Marker==== | ||
- | :'''STRONG BAD:''' All right, front yard, hit me with your best shot! ''{digs}'' What the | + | :'''STRONG BAD:''' All right, front yard, hit me with your best shot! ''{digs}'' What the—!? ''{finds a page of the Snake Boxer 5 manual}'' |
== Strong Bad Emails == | == Strong Bad Emails == | ||
- | === | + | ===Sitting Down=== |
- | : | + | :''{During game intro only}'' |
- | + | ||
- | + | ||
- | + | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{singing}'' I'm gonna check my email, my email, my email. I'm gonna check my whaat? | :'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{singing}'' I'm gonna check my email, my email, my email. I'm gonna check my whaat? | ||
:{{short hr}} | :{{short hr}} | ||
Line 565: | Line 555: | ||
:{{short hr}} | :{{short hr}} | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' I kick you in the head with my e-mail boot! | :'''STRONG BAD:''' I kick you in the head with my e-mail boot! | ||
- | |||
- | |||
- | === | + | === Beat Homestar? === |
- | :'' | + | :''{E-mail only appears in game intro}'' |
- | + | ||
- | + | ||
- | + | ||
- | + | ||
- | + | ||
- | + | ||
- | :' | + | <blockquote class="lappy email"> |
+ | <div>subject: Beat Homestar?</div> | ||
+ | Dear Strong Bad, I've got a question: If you hate Homestar<br/> | ||
+ | so much, why dont you just beat the snot out of him? Are<br/> | ||
+ | you chicken or something?<br/> | ||
+ | Confused,<br/> | ||
+ | Eddie M., Frenchtown, CA. | ||
+ | </blockquote> | ||
+ | :''{Strong Bad pronounces "dont" as "dahnt", and "Confused" as "Confussed"}'' | ||
- | + | :'''STRONG BAD:''' First of all, I don't think a Frenchy like yourself is in any position to be calling anyone "chicken", comprende-vous cordon bleu? ''{when typing Strong Bad omits the word "in" from the phrase "in any position"}'' | |
- | :'''STRONG BAD:''' | + | |
- | + | :''{Clears screen}'' | |
- | + | ||
- | + | ||
- | :'' | + | |
- | + | ||
- | + | ||
- | :'' | + | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Secondly, I'm pretty sure I don't want to beat the ''snot'' out of Homestar... I mean, have you ever listened to the guy? He's ''obviously'' got a '''lot''' of gunk up there. I could probably handle beating the tar, the stuffing, or the... into next-week out of him though. |
- | + | :''{Strong Bad steps away from the Lappy}'' | |
- | :'' | + | |
- | === | + | :'''STRONG BAD:''' I bet I could find Homestar down at Coach Z's track, running in place or something. |
+ | === Pummelling? === | ||
<blockquote class="lappy email"> | <blockquote class="lappy email"> | ||
<div>subject: Pummelling?</div> | <div>subject: Pummelling?</div> | ||
Line 603: | Line 588: | ||
:''{Strong Bad pronounces the last name "Oooh Meeeera", and says "Country Crock" instead of "County Cork"}'' | :''{Strong Bad pronounces the last name "Oooh Meeeera", and says "Country Crock" instead of "County Cork"}'' | ||
:{{short hr}} | :{{short hr}} | ||
- | :'' | + | :''{when checking the email a second time}'' |
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Oh yeah, beating the snot out of Homestar. I should probably get back to that someday. | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Oh yeah, beating the snot out of Homestar. I should probably get back to that someday. | ||
- | === | + | === Got Bulk? === |
<blockquote class="lappy email"> | <blockquote class="lappy email"> | ||
<div>subject: Got Bulk?</div> | <div>subject: Got Bulk?</div> | ||
Line 623: | Line 608: | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{typing as he speaks}'' Dear Total Load Peoples, Although I personally am endowed with bulging biceps that have been described as "bad boys," "pipes," and "thunder bludgeons," it never hurts to get a heroically chiseled leg up on the competition. Please send me a free sample of your wonderful product immediately. Grape flavor. Yours truly, Strong Bad. | :'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{typing as he speaks}'' Dear Total Load Peoples, Although I personally am endowed with bulging biceps that have been described as "bad boys," "pipes," and "thunder bludgeons," it never hurts to get a heroically chiseled leg up on the competition. Please send me a free sample of your wonderful product immediately. Grape flavor. Yours truly, Strong Bad. | ||
:{{short hr}} | :{{short hr}} | ||
- | :'' | + | :''{when checking the email a second time}'' |
:'''STRONG BAD:''' I probably can't get another free sample. | :'''STRONG BAD:''' I probably can't get another free sample. | ||
- | === | + | === Your Head === |
<blockquote class="lappy email"> | <blockquote class="lappy email"> | ||
<div>subject: Your Head</div> | <div>subject: Your Head</div> | ||
Line 633: | Line 618: | ||
Quizzically, Jay and Jim Rosen, Brookyln, NY. | Quizzically, Jay and Jim Rosen, Brookyln, NY. | ||
</blockquote> | </blockquote> | ||
- | :''{ | + | :''{shouts the capitalized part}'' |
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Hmm, that's a good question. I should go do some field research. | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Hmm, that's a good question. I should go do some field research. | ||
:{{short hr}} | :{{short hr}} | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Hmm. | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Hmm. | ||
- | === | + | === Hey There! === |
<blockquote class="lappy email"> | <blockquote class="lappy email"> | ||
<div>subject: Hey There!</div> | <div>subject: Hey There!</div> | ||
Line 654: | Line 639: | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' I never should've signed up for Bubs' Free Weekly Spamvertisements. Come to think of it, I'm pretty sure I never did. | :'''STRONG BAD:''' I never should've signed up for Bubs' Free Weekly Spamvertisements. Come to think of it, I'm pretty sure I never did. | ||
- | === | + | === Tie-Things === |
<blockquote class="lappy email"> | <blockquote class="lappy email"> | ||
<div>subject: Tie-Things</div> | <div>subject: Tie-Things</div> | ||
Line 662: | Line 647: | ||
-Christine B | -Christine B | ||
</blockquote> | </blockquote> | ||
- | :''{ | + | :''{Pronounces "Strtong" as "Stir-tong"}'' |
:'''STRONG BAD:''' More like Christine D+, as in you get one, in life! Y'know, I was gonna ask you something similar, Christine. What's the deal with that giant nose-thing on the ''front of your face?!'' | :'''STRONG BAD:''' More like Christine D+, as in you get one, in life! Y'know, I was gonna ask you something similar, Christine. What's the deal with that giant nose-thing on the ''front of your face?!'' | ||
- | === | + | === Total Load Confirmation === |
<blockquote class="lappy email"> | <blockquote class="lappy email"> | ||
<div>subject: Total Load Confirmation</div> | <div>subject: Total Load Confirmation</div> | ||
Line 678: | Line 663: | ||
TOTAL LOAD TOTAL etc., INC.<br/> | TOTAL LOAD TOTAL etc., INC.<br/> | ||
</blockquote> | </blockquote> | ||
- | :''{ | + | :''{Stresses the incorrectly plural word "Thanks"}'' |
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Bubs distributes Total Load? Man, he carries everything! | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Bubs distributes Total Load? Man, he carries everything! | ||
- | === | + | === Total Load Arrival === |
<blockquote class="lappy email"> | <blockquote class="lappy email"> | ||
<div>subject: Total Load Arrival</div> | <div>subject: Total Load Arrival</div> | ||
Line 693: | Line 678: | ||
</blockquote> | </blockquote> | ||
:''{Strong Bad ignores the extraneous word "arrived" on the third line, as well as the misspelled word "distirbutor"; He says "etc." twice and adds "whatever" at the end of the email, but makes no further comments}'' | :''{Strong Bad ignores the extraneous word "arrived" on the third line, as well as the misspelled word "distirbutor"; He says "etc." twice and adds "whatever" at the end of the email, but makes no further comments}'' | ||
+ | |||
+ | === Deleted === | ||
+ | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Survey Says! — Deleted. | ||
+ | :{{short hr}} | ||
+ | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Dee! Lee! Ted! | ||
+ | :{{short hr}} | ||
+ | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Deleted! | ||
+ | :{{short hr}} | ||
+ | :'''STRONG BAD:''' El Deleto Grande! | ||
+ | |||
+ | === Undeleted === | ||
+ | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Deteled! That's... deleted backwards. | ||
+ | :{{short hr}} | ||
+ | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Deleted no more! | ||
+ | :{{short hr}} | ||
+ | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Delete, meet un! | ||
+ | :{{short hr}} | ||
+ | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Undeleted! | ||
==Strong Bad's Room== | ==Strong Bad's Room== | ||
Line 701: | Line 704: | ||
===Drawing Table=== | ===Drawing Table=== | ||
:'''At the start of the game''' | :'''At the start of the game''' | ||
- | ::''First time only'' | + | ::''{First time only}'' |
::'''STRONG BAD:''' You know what I need to add some much-needed ''hooah!'' to my day? A little thing I like to call Teen Girl Squad! | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' You know what I need to add some much-needed ''hooah!'' to my day? A little thing I like to call Teen Girl Squad! | ||
- | ::''{[[Homestar Ruiner Teen Girl Squad|Teen Girl Squad]] mini-game starts. | + | ::''{[[Homestar Ruiner Teen Girl Squad|Teen Girl Squad]] mini-game starts. After the mini-game}'' |
- | + | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' Man, I can never get enough of that Sassy, Injury-Prone Teen Girl Squad! The only thing that could possibly make their adventures even more unfortunate would be if I used those Really Cool Teen Girl Ideas I jotted down last night after a fried chicken pizza bender— | |
- | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' Man, I can never get enough of that Sassy, Injury-Prone Teen Girl Squad! The only thing that could possibly make their adventures even more unfortunate would be if I used those Really Cool Teen Girl Ideas I jotted down last night after a fried chicken pizza bender | + | |
::''{looks around the table}'' | ::''{looks around the table}'' | ||
::'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey, what happened to all my Really Cool Teen Girl Squad Ideas? | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey, what happened to all my Really Cool Teen Girl Squad Ideas? | ||
- | |||
- | |||
- | |||
- | |||
- | |||
- | |||
- | |||
- | |||
- | |||
- | |||
- | |||
- | |||
- | |||
:'''While Homestar is still in the house, but not standing at the table, or during the party''' | :'''While Homestar is still in the house, but not standing at the table, or during the party''' | ||
Line 729: | Line 718: | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Nothing like a little snake fisticuffs to clear the mind... ''{picks up controller}'' Ok, show me that logo! ''{singing}'' ''Do do dooo doo... DIII!'' Awesome, Snake Boxer 5! So much better than the unfortunate Snake Boxer 4: Lady Snake Parade. | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Nothing like a little snake fisticuffs to clear the mind... ''{picks up controller}'' Ok, show me that logo! ''{singing}'' ''Do do dooo doo... DIII!'' Awesome, Snake Boxer 5! So much better than the unfortunate Snake Boxer 4: Lady Snake Parade. | ||
:''{after the mini-game}'' | :''{after the mini-game}'' | ||
- | :'''STRONG BAD:''' That was awesome! The only thing that could make Snake Boxer 5 even cooler is using that secret code to unlock the game's controversial ''hidden mode.'' It's a good thing I wrote down the code in the manual right | + | :'''STRONG BAD:''' That was awesome! The only thing that could make Snake Boxer 5 even cooler is using that secret code to unlock the game's controversial ''hidden mode.'' It's a good thing I wrote down the code in the manual right— over— ''{looks around}'' Hey! who took my Snake Boxer 5 manual? |
:{{short hr}} | :{{short hr}} | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Must. Punch. Snakes. | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Must. Punch. Snakes. | ||
Line 832: | Line 821: | ||
=== Homestar → Teen Girl Squad === | === Homestar → Teen Girl Squad === | ||
- | :'' | + | :''{first time}'' |
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Put your hands up, and back away from the Teen Girl Squad, Homestar. We don't want this situation to escalate. | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Put your hands up, and back away from the Teen Girl Squad, Homestar. We don't want this situation to escalate. | ||
- | :'''HOMESTAR | + | :'''HOMESTAR:''' Not yet, Strong Bad. I've got to finish my 23-Volume Epic Graphic Novel Zine about a Really Cool Guy who wins the ''{fanfare}'' Race to the End of the Race, and slays a dragon, and starts dating a supermodel and makes his old boring girlfriend jealous, and— |
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Yeah, yeah, I get it. How long will it be before I can use my drawing table again? | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Yeah, yeah, I get it. How long will it be before I can use my drawing table again? | ||
- | :'''HOMESTAR | + | :'''HOMESTAR:''' Oh it might be a while. I still haven't figured out what to call my Really Cool lead character. |
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Grr... | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Grr... | ||
:{{short hr}} | :{{short hr}} | ||
- | :'' | + | :''{second time}'' |
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Are you done with your moron opus yet? | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Are you done with your moron opus yet? | ||
- | :'''HOMESTAR | + | :'''HOMESTAR:''' I'm almost ready to start... what do you like better, "Goldstar Stunner" or "Dash Bigstar"? |
:{{short hr}} | :{{short hr}} | ||
- | :'' | + | :''{each time thereafter}'' |
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Finish your comic already! | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Finish your comic already! | ||
- | :'''HOMESTAR | + | :'''HOMESTAR:''' I'm trying, but the words keep coming out all misspelled and unintentionally humorous! Oh, if only I knew what it was like to be a winner! |
===Homestar's comic=== | ===Homestar's comic=== | ||
Line 861: | Line 850: | ||
=== Trophy → Homestar === | === Trophy → Homestar === | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{talking to camera}'' Hmm, this will require some stra''ter''gery... <!-- sic --> ''{talking to Homestar}'' Hey, look at that, thing... over there. | :'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{talking to camera}'' Hmm, this will require some stra''ter''gery... <!-- sic --> ''{talking to Homestar}'' Hey, look at that, thing... over there. | ||
- | :'''HOMESTAR | + | :'''HOMESTAR:''' A thing? Where?! ''{looks around, Strong Bad hits him over the head with the trophy, he collapses}'' |
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey, dumpwad, wake up! | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey, dumpwad, wake up! | ||
- | :'''HOMESTAR | + | :'''HOMESTAR:''' ''{gets up}'' Who? What? Why? Oh, crap! I just had a wonderful dream where I won the Race to the End of the Race! ''{fanfare}'' |
:'''STRONG BAD:''' But Homestar, it wasn't a dream, see? ''{gestures to trophy, now sitting on the table}'' You really did win the Race to the End of the Whatchamacallit! | :'''STRONG BAD:''' But Homestar, it wasn't a dream, see? ''{gestures to trophy, now sitting on the table}'' You really did win the Race to the End of the Whatchamacallit! | ||
- | :'''HOMESTAR | + | :'''HOMESTAR:''' I did? But how? |
:'''STRONG BAD:''' How should I know? Maybe you were... sleep-running or something. | :'''STRONG BAD:''' How should I know? Maybe you were... sleep-running or something. | ||
- | :'''HOMESTAR | + | :'''HOMESTAR:''' Yesss... that makes perfect sense. Well, looks like my 23-part graphic novel can wait for another day. ''{leaves, with trophy}'' |
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Finally, I was thinking I'd never get to maim another badly drawn teen girl ever again! | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Finally, I was thinking I'd never get to maim another badly drawn teen girl ever again! | ||
===Videlectrix Poster=== | ===Videlectrix Poster=== | ||
- | :'' | + | :'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{first time only}'' That's my Videlectrix Poster that I got for sending in ten bucks to become a member of the Videlectrix Good Graphicketeers! |
- | :''' | + | |
:{{short hr}} | :{{short hr}} | ||
- | :'''STRONG BAD:''' "Videlectrix | + | :'''STRONG BAD:''' "Videlectrix — We Use Computers... to Make Video Games!" I don't know why no one else has thought of that... |
=== When entering the room === | === When entering the room === | ||
:'''Only if Homestar is present''' | :'''Only if Homestar is present''' | ||
::''{music}'' | ::''{music}'' | ||
- | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' What? How? Huh? You were just | + | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' What? How? Huh? You were just— |
- | ::'''HOMESTAR | + | ::'''HOMESTAR:''' ''{sighs} (if in kitchen)'' Siiiiigh... |
== Strong Sad's Room == | == Strong Sad's Room == | ||
=== Strong Sad's Door === | === Strong Sad's Door === | ||
- | :'' | + | :''{first time}'' |
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey Strong Sad! You in there? | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey Strong Sad! You in there? | ||
:'''STRONG SAD:''' Yes! | :'''STRONG SAD:''' Yes! | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' C'mon, lemme in! I just wanna punch you a few hundred times! | :'''STRONG BAD:''' C'mon, lemme in! I just wanna punch you a few hundred times! | ||
:'''STRONG SAD:''' Not interested. | :'''STRONG SAD:''' Not interested. | ||
- | :'' | + | :{{short hr}} |
+ | :''{second time}'' | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' C'mon Strong Sad, I've got your favorite food, some nasty ethnic food! | :'''STRONG BAD:''' C'mon Strong Sad, I've got your favorite food, some nasty ethnic food! | ||
:'''STRONG SAD:''' I don't believe in favoring one food over another. | :'''STRONG SAD:''' I don't believe in favoring one food over another. | ||
- | :'' | + | :{{short hr}} |
- | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Strong Sad Raymond Jenkins, you open this door right now or I'll | + | :''{each time thereafter}'' |
+ | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Strong Sad Raymond Jenkins, you open this door right now or I'll— I'll— I'll— | ||
:'''STRONG SAD:''' You'll what? | :'''STRONG SAD:''' You'll what? | ||
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Oh, we'll just wait until your father gets home and see what he says! | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Oh, we'll just wait until your father gets home and see what he says! | ||
Line 909: | Line 899: | ||
::'''STRONG BAD:''' So there you have it Monsieur Manure: the video game adaptation of how I finally beat the snot out of Homestar, in the most direct and least convoluted way. Man I'm awesome. Eat snail, Strong Bad. | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' So there you have it Monsieur Manure: the video game adaptation of how I finally beat the snot out of Homestar, in the most direct and least convoluted way. Man I'm awesome. Eat snail, Strong Bad. | ||
::''{camera pulls back, Strong Bad turns around and stands up on Stooly}'' | ::''{camera pulls back, Strong Bad turns around and stands up on Stooly}'' | ||
- | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{half singing}'' So you see people, that's why you can't, no you can't, uhn, handle my style, because it's hot, ''{jumps off Stooly, and lands on the washer (in the basement), hops down and walks to the couch}'' ''{very quickly}'' so please allow 10 to 15 minutes for it to properly cool before you try to handle my styyyyle! ''{lies down and closes his eyes, camera pans up and left, cutting through the wall and to the lappy. Ominous music is heard. The Municipality logo is seen on the Lappy's screen. Slow zoom in and fade}'' ''{Credit roll b/w dimmed out scene of Strong Bad sleeping on the couch}'' ''{Following credits, a preview for [[ | + | ::'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{half singing}'' So you see people, that's why you can't, no you can't, uhn, handle my style, because it's hot, ''{jumps off Stooly, and lands on the washer (in the basement), hops down and walks to the couch}'' ''{very quickly}'' so please allow 10 to 15 minutes for it to properly cool before you try to handle my styyyyle! ''{lies down and closes his eyes, camera pans up and left, cutting through the wall and to the lappy. Ominous music is heard. The Municipality logo is seen on the Lappy's screen. Slow zoom in and fade}'' ''{Credit roll b/w dimmed out scene of Strong Bad sleeping on the couch}'' ''{Following credits, a preview for [[Strong_Badia_the_Free#Preview_Transcript|Strong Badia the Free]] is seen before returning to the game menu}'' |
+ | {{SBCG4AP}} | ||
- | + | [[Category:Video Game Responses]] |