Toikey TV

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Toon Category: Holiday Toon
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"We can finally watch not-football!"

Strong Bad flips through Thanksgiving-themed television programs.

Cast (in order of appearance): Strong Mad, Strong Bad, The Cheat, The King of Town, Saddy Dumpington, Turkey Joe, Marzipan, Gunhaver, Silent Rip, Reinforcements, Fightgar, Crackotage, Reynold, Blue Laser Commander, Blue Laser Minion, Bubs

Places: Strong Bad's Basement, The Field, Folk Tale World, Marzipan's House, Cheat Commandos HQ, Bubs' Concession Stand

Date: Monday, November 19, 2007

Running Time: 2:30

Page Title: Don't be a Jerky...

Contents

Transcript

{open with a pan down to Strong Bad and Strong Mad draped on the couch in the basement. The Cheat lays in the crisper drawer nearby. Nearly empty plates of food are scattered around them. Television noises can be heard, while the trio groans}

TELEVISION ANNOUNCER: Reg has the ball at the top of the twenty... The fifteen... The ten! Touchdown! {whistle blows}

STRONG MAD: {groans} FLUFFY PUFF CASSEROLE... {falls asleep and begins snoring}

STRONG BAD: {turns to The Cheat} All right, The Cheat! Strong Mad's asleep! We can finally watch not-football!

THE CHEAT: {The Cheat noises}

STRONG BAD: What do ya mean, there's nothing else good on? 'Course there is! It's Thanksgiving Day!

{cut to the TV, where the King of Town appears onscreen, standing in the Field, near a pot of some kind}

THE KING OF TOWN: Hello! I'ma King of Town, here with an important message about Thanksgiving safety! Specifically, the dangers of not frying a turkey! Each year—

{a graph comes down, showing three bars for "NOT Fried Turkey Family", "Fried Turkey Family", and "Pile o' Bones", with the heading "1985-2002". The "NOT Fried Turkey Family" bar is the largest}

THE KING OF TOWN: —thousands of families suffer from not fried turkeys. So please, this Thanksgiving {the words come up onscreen as he talks} don't be a jerky, fry that turkey!

{the screen crackles, and the scene changes to Saddy Dumpington and Turkey Joe standing in the woods}

SADDY DUMPINGTON: There's nothing to worry about, Turkey Joe! Even though I'm going to gut you and rip your entrails out with my hand, I'm gonna grind 'em up with some rosemary and sage and shove 'em right back up there! Isn't that great?

{Turkey Joe starts crying. Cut with the screen fizzle to Marzipan in her kitchen, where all manner of food ingredients are laid out before her}

MARZIPAN: All right, all you turkey liberators out there. Here's how we make Marzipan's Famous Thanksgiving Faux-ducken. {as she says this, a piece of paper baring the words appears in the left corner. As she continues, the recipe appears on the paper} Now stuff millet inside of bulgur, inside of meatless veggie nuggets {lifts one}, inside of tempeh, injected into bean curd, wrapped in fakin bacon, and baked inside a pair of hemp toddler pants. {holds up a pair of rough pants, with a small duckie patch sewn on them}

{Cut with screen fizzle to the Cheat Commandos in their headquarters. Aside from Gunhaver, each commando is wearing a pilgrim hat}

GUNHAVER: Well, pilgrims, it looks like all we're getting this year is another lame Thankgiving special!

{Close up on Silent Rip, who is wearing his hat on top of his helmet}

SILENT RIP: At least we didn't get stuck with Secretary Appreciation Day!

{Cut to Reynold}

REYNOLD: I think you mean "Administrative Professionals' Day"!

{cut to an office, where the Blue Laser Commander sits. A minion approaches him with a cup of coffee}

BLUE LASER MINION: Here's your coffee, sir. {he leaves}

BLUE LASER COMMANDER: Nice gams, sweetcheeks!

{screen fizzle cut to Bubs at his concession stand. The word "ATTENTION!!" flashes in big, yellow letters}

BUBS: Attention, holiday shoppers! {cut to a calendar, with "bubs friday" written in for Friday the 23rd. As Bubs speaks, the date is circled, and an arrow is drawn to the day before it} Bubs Friday starts Thursday! {scene shifts to the side of his concession stand, with the heading "$AVINGS $CHEDULE:"} The line forms at 1 AM! {"1:00AM - Line Forms" is added to the schedule} Doors open at 2 AM! {"2:00AM - Doors Open" is added to the schedule} Shoving and trampling starts promptly at 2:05. {"2:05AM - Shovin N' Tramplin'" is added} Followed by tear gas and riot police at 2:15. {"2:15AM - Tear Gas/Cops" appears} {cut back to Bubs} Come on, moms! You know you want to beat each other up over some stupid kids' toy! And if you draw blood, you just might make it onto this year's edition of Mommy Fights! {holds up a VHS cassette case for "Mommy Fights!"}

{fizzle cut back to Strong Bad and The Cheat}

STRONG BAD: Uhh, I guess you were right, The Cheat. There is nothing else good on. Oh, well. Pass me that gravy boat!

{The Cheat picks up a gravy boat and hands it to Strong Bad, who opens his mouth wide and begins to lift the gravy boat to his mouth}

{cut to the front of the TV set, which has the logo for the football game on it}

TELEVISION ANNOUNCER: We now return to the second half of the 2007 Falling Asleep On The Couch Watching Football Bowl! {the gravy boat comes up with the "Back" button, ending the toon}

Fun Facts

Goofs

  • When the King of Town's chart moves away, it can be seen outside the television screen for a single frame.
  • The "Bubs Friday" $chedule is missing apostrophes at the end of "SHOVIN" and before "N'". It should read "SHOVIN' 'N' TRAMPLIN'".

Inside References

  • The Cheat lounges in the crisper drawer.
  • This is another instance of pants.
  • Marzipan's recipe uses fake bacon.
  • There are 3 peas on Strong Mad's plate.
  • "Turkey" is spelled "Toikey" in the toon's title.
  • Saddy Dumpington first appeared in A Folky Tale.
  • When Gunhaver says the Cheat Commandos are in "another lame Thanksgiving special" he is referring to Let Us Give TANKS!.
  • "Reg has the ball" is a reference to Emails autobiography and anything.

Real-World References

  • Bubs Friday is a reference to Black Friday, which falls the day after Thanksgiving and marks heavy discounts and early store opening hours, as well as the start of the Christmas shopping season.
  • There have been many fad toys that debuted at the start of Christmas shopping season that have caused shoppers to trample one another such as Tickle Me Elmo and Cabbage Patch Kids.
  • Marzipan's recipe for Faux-ducken is a parody of turducken, a meal that is a deboned turkey, stuffed with a deboned duck, stuffed with a deboned chicken.
  • Administrative Professionals' Day, formerly known as Secretaries' Day, is an unofficial holiday observed on the third or fourth Wednesday of April to recognize the work of secretaries and other administrative support professionals.
  • The title of the toon refers to Turkey TV, a Canadian sketch comedy from the creator of You Can't Do That On Television.
  • The name of the bowl game, "Falling Asleep on the Couch Watching Football Bowl," could be a reference to some of the more ridiculous non-BCS bowl game names. Such as, "(company name).com Bowl."

External Links

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