Subtitles:sbemail144/en
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<?xml version="1.0" encoding="utf-8"?> <transcript xml:lang="en-us" file="sbemail144.swf" width="550" height="400"> <line start="16" end="55" speaker="strongbad"><em>(singing)</em> I met this email on a north-bound train.</line> <line start="56" end="99" speaker="strongbad"><em>(singing)</em> We had some dinner, then we danced in the rain.</line> <line start="100" end="133" speaker="strongbad">"Have you ever been the narrator for a movie?"</line> <line start="134" end="165" speaker="strongbad">"Grant Gossman from Minnesota."</line> <line start="166" end="194" speaker="strongbad">No Grossman, I have not.</line> <line start="195" end="234" speaker="strongbad">But you know what's way better than narrating movies?</line> <line start="235" end="289" speaker="strongbad">Narrating peoples' pathetic everyday lives like they're movie trailers.</line> <line start="290" end="314" speaker="strongbad">Ready? Let's try it!</line> <line start="332" end="357" speaker="strongbad">Meet Strong Sad.</line> <line start="358" end="384" speaker="strongsad">What? Who are you talking to?</line> <line start="385" end="447" speaker="strongbad">All he ever wanted was to eat his grody ethnic food in peace.</line> <line start="448" end="491" speaker="strongsad">Hey man, this a rogan josh pot pie!</line> <line start="492" end="543" speaker="strongbad">Until one day, fate threw him a curveball.</line> <line start="546" end="553" speaker="strongsad">OW!</line> <line start="554" end="593" speaker="strongbad">Lump of Dump Pictures proudly presents:</line> <line start="594" end="603" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">"Whined<span style="visibility:hidden"> and Dined".</span></line> <line start="604" end="609" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">"Whined and<span style="visibility:hidden"> Dined".</span></line> <line start="610" end="629" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">"Whined and Dined".</line> <line start="631" end="672" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">In the game of life, may the best man<span style="visibility:hidden"> whine.</span></line> <line start="673" end="709" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">In the game of life, may the best man whine.</line> <line start="712" end="792" speaker="strongbad">In a post-apocalyptic world where weird old men survive on boring conversations...</line> <line start="793" end="847" speaker="bubs">I suppose we could talk about my napkin friend for another couple hours.</line> <line start="848" end="876" speaker="strongbad">...a line will be drawn.</line> <line start="877" end="922" speaker="coachz">YOUR napkin?! Well, it's got my snot balls on it!</line> <line start="923" end="955" speaker="strongbad">A hero will rise.</line> <line start="956" end="983" speaker="bubs">Man, you don't even have a nose!</line> <line start="984" end="1019" speaker="strongbad">And an empire will fall.</line> <line start="1034" end="1065" speaker="strongbad">Factor Z!</line> <line start="1069" end="1097" speaker="strongbad">They were a couple in love.</line> <line start="1098" end="1128" speaker="marzipan">Homestar, you look like a dork with that on.</line> <line start="1129" end="1178" speaker="strongbad">Until a dorky chef's hat threatened to tear them apart.</line> <line start="1179" end="1223" speaker="homestar">Oh, yeah? Well maybe you look like some type of enormous...<span style="visibility:hidden"> alien... cow!</span></line> <line start="1224" end="1234" speaker="homestar">Oh, yeah? Well maybe you look like some type of enormous... alien...<span style="visibility:hidden"> cow!</span></line> <line start="1235" end="1244" speaker="homestar">Oh, yeah? Well maybe you look like some type of enormous... alien... cow!</line> <line start="1245" end="1256" speaker="marzipan" sfx="sfx">gasps</line> <line start="1257" end="1273" speaker="strongbad">This summer,—</line> <line start="1274" end="1298" speaker="strongbad">—this holiday season,—</line> <line start="1299" end="1319" speaker="strongbad">—this Arbor Day,</line> <line start="1320" end="1418" speaker="strongbad">Some smelly French studio invites YOU to sit through a four hour film with no dialogue and no plot.</line> <line start="1419" end="1430" speaker="strongbad">"Whatsit<span style="visibility:hidden"> All About"</span></line> <line start="1431" end="1453" speaker="strongbad">"Whatsit All About"</line> <line start="1457" end="1488" speaker="strongbad">Two unlikely partners...</line> <line start="1489" end="1521" speaker="strongmad">I ATE MY BATTLESHIP!</line> <line start="1522" end="1549" speaker="strongbad">...one brain between them.</line> <line start="1550" end="1564" speaker="thecheat">sighs</line> <line start="1565" end="1621" speaker="strongbad">From the creators of "I'm Surprised Strong Mad Hasn't Eaten The Cheat by Now"</line> <line start="1622" end="1628" speaker="strongmad">Awww!</line> <line start="1629" end="1646" speaker="strongbad">get ready to—</line> <line start="1647" end="1661" speaker="strongbad">LUG...<span style="visibility:hidden"> IT... AROUND.</span></line> <line start="1662" end="1673" speaker="strongbad">LUG... IT...<span style="visibility:hidden"> AROUND.</span></line> <line start="1674" end="1692" speaker="strongbad">LUG... IT... AROUND.</line> <line start="1693" end="1717" speaker="strongbad">"Lugnut and Squeak"</line> <line start="1718" end="1728" speaker="thecheat">The Cheat noise</line> <line start="1731" end="1785" speaker="strongbad">For hundreds of years it has haunted mankind.</line> <line start="1786" end="1837" speaker="strongbad">From the master of teenagers-on-a-camping-trip-esque horror.</line> <line start="1838" end="1880" speaker="strongsad">Are you gonna throw a dead goose at me or something?</line> <line start="1881" end="1930" speaker="strongbad">Comes the remake no one has been waiting for:</line> <line start="1931" end="1981" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">"Things That Go Dump in The Night".</line> <line start="1996" end="2001" speaker="strongsad" sfx="sfx">screams</line> <line start="2026" end="2043" speaker="strongbad">The critics agree!</line> <line start="2044" end="2059" speaker="strongbad">"A triumph!"</line> <line start="2060" end="2101" speaker="strongbad">"A cinematic breakfast snack of some kind!"</line> <line start="2102" end="2123" speaker="strongbad">"It sure was a movie."</line> <line start="2124" end="2139" speaker="strongbad"><em>(rapidly)</em> Now playing in select cities.</line> <line start="2140" end="2189" speaker="strongbad"><em>(rapidly)</em> This Strong Bad Email has been rated P for The Poopsmith and a graphic scene of The Paper.</line> <line start="2195" end="2258" speaker="strongsad">Look, all I'm saying is it felt more like a change-up than a curveball.</line> <line start="2259" end="2284" speaker="strongbad">What are you, the SBEmail police now?</line> <line start="2285" end="2313" speaker="strongbad">This is like three weeks in a row!</line> <line start="2320" end="2378" speaker="pbtcmarzipan">You know, Nebulon, I've always admired your styles.</line> <line start="2379" end="2408" speaker="sfx">space sound effect</line> </transcript>
