Talkin' Strong Bad Plush Doll Recording Sesh
From Homestar Runner Wiki
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Strong Bad records lines for his talking plush doll. Accessed by entering the correct password on strongbadallthetimesogreat.com.
Cast (in order of appearance): Puppet Strong Bad, Puppet Homestar Runner, Puppet The Cheat
Places: Recording booth
Date: Sunday, November 29, 2020
Running time: 4:19
Contents |
Transcript
{Open to Puppet Strong Bad in a recording booth with a microphone. There are two water bottles in the background.}
DIRECTOR: {voiceover} All right, from the top. "I'm Strong Bad from Homestar Runner dot com."
STRONG BAD: I'm Strong Bad from Strong Bad dot gov!
DIRECTOR: {voiceover} That's not the URL, you're not a federal agency.
STRONG BAD: What?
{Beep cut to next shot.}
STRONG BAD: I'm Strong Bad from Strong Bad Logistics Incorporated and Buffet!
{Beep cut to next shot.}
STRONG BAD: I'm Strong Bad from the depths of the ancient Internet!
{Beep cut to next shot.}
STRONG BAD: I'm Strong Bad from Homestrong Badder dot... run.
{Beep cut to next shot.}
STRONG BAD: I'm Greaty from Strong Greaty Great Great!
{Beep cut to next shot.}
DIRECTOR: {voiceover} Homestar Runner dot com.
STRONG BAD: I'm Strong Bad from Strong Bad all the time so great dot com.
DIRECTOR: {voiceover} Again.
STRONG BAD: {hesitantly} I'm Strong Bad from Homest...er... {trembles with frustration}
DIRECTOR: {voiceover} Homestar Runner dot com.
STRONG BAD: I don't wanna say it!
DIRECTOR: {voiceover} Why not?
STRONG BAD: I don't want his name to come out of my plush doll!
{Beep cut to next shot. Puppet Homestar has taken Strong Bad's place.}
HOMESTAR RUNNER: {gruff voice} Wagh, I'm Strong Bad.
{Beep cut to next shot.}
HOMESTAR RUNNER: {gruff voice} Agh, holy crap. I can draw a draw-gon man. Draw-ga-dor.
DIRECTOR: {voiceover} That's— that's pretty good. Uh, we've got that in case he doesn't show up.
{Beep cut to next shot. Strong Bad has returned to take Homestar's place.}
STRONG BAD: If you squeeze me a million times, I barf!
DIRECTOR: {voiceover} Uh, we had to cut that functionality. Too expensive.
STRONG BAD: What? That was the best part!
{Beep cut to next shot.}
DIRECTOR: {voiceover} How 'bout a nice "TROGDOOOR"?
STRONG BAD: Naw, that's too played out. How 'bout I improv somethin' new and fresh? Like... {rapping} Strong Bad plush doll all the time, {a beat begins} squeeze him on his head and he'll give you a rhyme. Take him to the airport, one two three. Security check, for you and for me. It's gonna get great when you get on the plane, why am I talkin' about travellin' so much?
{Beep cut to next shot.}
STRONG BAD: So what are we doin' next?
DIRECTOR: {voiceover} How 'bout something from one of your classic emails?
STRONG BAD: Ooh, like tape-leg!
DIRECTOR: {voiceover} Uh, maybe more classic than tape-leg?
STRONG BAD: No way, that's numba one, top ten!
DIRECTOR: {voiceover} Is it number one or is it top ten?
STRONG BAD: You shut up! {lifts up his foot, which has tape wrapped around it} Tape-leeeg!
{Beep cut to next shot.}
STRONG BAD: You're my best friend. You know, after The Cheat, Strong Mad, and... pretty much everybody else in the world.
{Beep cut to next shot. Once again, Homestar is there instead of Strong Bad.}
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Hey kids, I'm Talkin' Homestar! Spin my buzzer to activate the jetpack, and squeeze my foot to launch the homing missiles! {pause} Man! This is gonna be like, the coolest toy ever!
DIRECTOR: {voiceover} Yeah, we're— we're a little over budget, so why don't you stick with things like, "I wuv you" and "you'we my best fwend"?
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Um... okay, but that doesn't sound anything like me. I don't say {slow, deeper voice} "I wuv you." {normal voice} I say, "I wuv you!" I don't say {slow, deeper voice} "You'we my best fwiend." {normal voice} I say, "You'we my best fwiend!"
DIRECTOR: {voiceover} Oh, yeah, that's great. Whatev— whatever you say.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: That is... whatever I say. That is what I said. Whatever I said was that, and I said it.
{Beep cut to next shot. Homestar has been replaced with Strong Bad.}
STRONG BAD: Reg had the ball at the top of the key.
DIRECTOR: {voiceover} We're not doin' the autobiography, stick to the plush doll.
STRONG BAD: Oh, sorry. I forgot which recording session we were in... or, recording sesh. You guys use seshes or sessions?
DIRECTOR: {voiceover} Um, I'm done talking to you.
{Beep cut to next shot. Music plays as Strong Bad shakes his tape-leg around for a few seconds. The music stops as he faces the camera.}
STRONG BAD: Tape-leg? Anybody?
{Beep cut to next shot.}
STRONG BAD: The "R" in routine stands for...
{Beep cut to next shot.}
STRONG BAD: {holding a crinkling water bottle} Hey kids, I'm Talkin' Strong Bad.
DIRECTOR: {voiceover} Uh, you're crinklin'.
STRONG BAD: No, n—not me. I definitely don't crinkle.
DIRECTOR: {voiceover} Uh, I think it's your water bottle.
STRONG BAD: {looks at his water bottle} Oh, sorry. Hey kids, I'm Talkin' Strong Bad.
DIRECTOR: {voiceover} Uh, it's still crinkling.
STRONG BAD: Well, let's just work that into the re-cord. It could be like I'm crushing the bones of my enemies!
{Beep cut to next shot.}
STRONG BAD: My boat take—
{Beep cut to next shot. The Cheat has taken Strong Bad's place.}
DIRECTOR: {voiceover} Okay, whenever you're ready.
THE CHEAT: {The Cheat noises}
{The Cheat clears his throat.}
THE CHEAT: {Powered by The Cheat Strong Bad's voice} I can do it! I will do it nine times.
{Beep cut to next shot. Strong Bad is recording.}
STRONG BAD: Holy crap!
DIRECTOR: {voiceover} Again.
STRONG BAD: Ho-lee crap!
DIRECTOR: {voiceover} Try again.
STRONG BAD: Hooo-leh crap!
DIRECTOR: {voiceover} Uh, something different.
STRONG BAD: {dejected} Holy craaaap. {with exaggerated pronunciation} Ho-lay craw-awp!
{Beep cut to next shot.}
STRONG BAD: Holay crapolay!
{Beep cut to next shot.}
STRONG BAD: Holistic crap!
{Beep cut to next shot.}
STRONG BAD: Crap-toh... hole-craw. Now you got me thinkin' about it too hard!
{Beep cut to next shot.}
STRONG BAD: {struggling; with a strained voice} Holayyy craaa... {grunt}
{Cut to another shot. The Strong Bad plush doll is in the booth with Puppet Strong Bad.}
STRONG BAD: {tapping the plush doll's diamond on each "boop"} Boop. Boop. {frustratedly} Boopboopboop! This thing doesn't work!
DIRECTOR: {voiceover} You're supposed to be recording the lines for it right now!
STRONG BAD: Oh ho ho, sorry about that. Forgot. {knocks the plush doll over} Boop.
{Cut to black.}
Fun Facts
Inside References
- "I can do it. I will do it nine times." is from Crazy Cartoon.
