Bogus Mathematical Theorems
From Homestar Runner Wiki
(reworded a little bit) |
(forcing PNG rendering over HTML for consistency; still unhappy with the apostrophes...) |
||
Line 8: | Line 8: | ||
Symbolically, this can be written as | Symbolically, this can be written as | ||
- | <center><math>\mbox{ stupid(butt)}\geq\mbox{ stupid(head)}</math></center> | + | <center><math>\!\,\mbox{ stupid(butt)}\geq\mbox{ stupid(head)}</math></center> |
==The Property of Ones== | ==The Property of Ones== | ||
Line 15: | Line 15: | ||
We consider a One with the following properties: | We consider a One with the following properties: | ||
- | * <math>\!{\mathcal O}^{\mathrm{itude}}</math> is a measure of the Oneness of the One. | + | * <math>\!\,{\mathcal O}^{\mathrm{itude}}</math> is a measure of the Oneness of the One. |
- | * <math>\!T</math> is the temperature of the One. | + | * <math>\!\,T</math> is the temperature of the One. |
- | * <math>\!c^{\mathrm{itude}}</math> is the coldness of the One. | + | * <math>\!\,c^{\mathrm{itude}}</math> is the coldness of the One. |
The Oneness of the One can be determined by the following simple formula: | The Oneness of the One can be determined by the following simple formula: | ||
<center><math>{\mathcal O}^{\mathrm{itude}}\propto c^{\mathrm{itude}}</math> .</center> | <center><math>{\mathcal O}^{\mathrm{itude}}\propto c^{\mathrm{itude}}</math> .</center> | ||
Line 28: | Line 28: | ||
As a result, we can rewrite our expression for Oneness in terms of temperature: | As a result, we can rewrite our expression for Oneness in terms of temperature: | ||
<center><math>{\mathcal O}^{\mathrm{itude}}=\frac{k}T</math> ,</center> | <center><math>{\mathcal O}^{\mathrm{itude}}=\frac{k}T</math> ,</center> | ||
- | so that <math>k</math> is a proportionality constant (in units of Oneness times [[Wikipedia:Kelvin|kelvins]]) that uniquely determines the Oneitude of a One given its temperature. If a One is not so cold, the temperature will be higher, thus minimizing its Oneness. In Strong Bad's own words, this can be simply stated: | + | so that <math>\!\,k</math> is a proportionality constant (in units of Oneness times [[Wikipedia:Kelvin|kelvins]]) that uniquely determines the Oneitude of a One given its temperature. If a One is not so cold, the temperature will be higher, thus minimizing its Oneness. In Strong Bad's own words, this can be simply stated: |
- | <center><math>\mbox{ A One that isn}'\mbox{t cold is scarcely a One at all.}</math></center> | + | <center><math>\!\,\mbox{ A One that isn}'\mbox{t cold is scarcely a One at all.}</math></center> |
The inverse is also true: | The inverse is also true: | ||
- | <center><math>\mbox{ The colder it is, the more of a One it is.}</math></center> | + | <center><math>\!\,\mbox{ The colder it is, the more of a One it is.}</math></center> |
==Coolguy's Law== | ==Coolguy's Law== |
Revision as of 02:04, 4 October 2007
Strong Bad periodically invents bogus mathematical theorems to illustrate his responses to fans on his Strong Bad Email show.
The Transitive Butt Property
When the sender of email butt IQ is skeptical that any sort of IQ test exists to determine whether or not someone's butt is stupid, Strong Bad quickly refutes his ignorance with the following property:
Symbolically, this can be written as
The Property of Ones
When a fan asks Strong Bad if he's ever had a one that was not cold, he responds by stating the Property of Ones: "The ONEitude is directly proportional to the Colditude of the ONE." Here follows a brief analysis of this statement.
We consider a One with the following properties:
- is a measure of the Oneness of the One.
- is the temperature of the One.
- is the coldness of the One.
The Oneness of the One can be determined by the following simple formula:
Naturally, a One has less coldness as its temperature increases, and it approaches having no coldness at all as its temperature approaches infinity; likewise, a One approaches having infinite coldness as its temperature approaches absolute zero:
Thus, a One's coldness is inversely related to its temperature:
As a result, we can rewrite our expression for Oneness in terms of temperature:
so that is a proportionality constant (in units of Oneness times kelvins) that uniquely determines the Oneitude of a One given its temperature. If a One is not so cold, the temperature will be higher, thus minimizing its Oneness. In Strong Bad's own words, this can be simply stated:
The inverse is also true:
Coolguy's Law
In order to assist an email sender who was having difficulty determining which slumber parties are worth attending, Strong Bad stated an important relation between the popularity of a potential party host and the amount of fun available to be had:
This law is illustrated symbolically by the following equation: