Rap Song

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"I said accidentally featuring Peacey P!"

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The Cheat is working on a music video starring Coach Z and accidentally featuring Peacey P.

Cast (in order of appearance): Coach Z, Peacey P, The Cheat

Places: The Cheat's Computer Room

Date: Monday, November 12, 2007

Running Time: 2:40

Page Title: Crample-O Stow Records Present!

Transcript

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{Open to a close-up of a washing machine with clothes tumbling inside. Zoom out to a view of Coach Z in a laundromat, standing next to the washing machines and a basket of clothes.}

COACH Z: Can I borrow some detergent from you, please?

{Peacey P comes over with a basket of clothes, mumbling incoherently.}

COACH Z: Say, wait! Look, it's the rapping man, come to do his landry! I was supposed to ask, can you record on my new album?

PEACEY P: {mumbling}

COACH Z: I can understand well that's a yes! It is one {unintelligible} rap song!

{Cut to a close-up of a boombox, with a tape in it labeled "Mick's Tape". Hip-hop music starts playing. The credits appear:}

Coach Z and Peacey P featuring Peacey P/
featuring Tenerence Love/ feauring Peacey P
"Rap Song"
The Lyricbolical Coach Z
Crample-O Stow Records

COACH Z: Coach Z, R-A-P,
Accidentally featuring Peacey P.

PEACEY P: You biscuithead, you ain't featuring me!

COACH Z: I said accidentally featuring Peacey P!

I'm the lyricbolical Coach Z,
I like my ointments topical mostly,
And if you got the itchy toes than come see me,
I got a rap song featuring Peacey P!

PEACEY P: My name is P, comma, Peacey
I like to eat my bacon all greasy
I'm the best guest rapper in the music biz,
I ain't even know whose song this is!

COACH Z: It's mine! I thought I made that abundantly clear! Here comes the hook!

COACH Z AND PEACEY P: R-A-P-S-O-N-G, yes,
Yes, y'all, and we don't stap,

COACH Z: Coach Z and Peacey P cold rappity-rap!

PEACEY P: Much money, more money, cash money, drop!

COACH Z: I'm the wrong janitor ringing out my mop!

PEACEY P: Stop, fool, you're cramping my style!

COACH Z: I'll sprinkle wack MCs with my sawdust pile!

PEACEY P: Listen up straight, y'all biscuitheads,
I'd like a piece of dry toast with two scrambled eggs!
Order o' hash browns, make 'em extra crisp,
A glass of orange juice and a bowl of cheese grits!

COACH Z: Oh, dag, that man has just ordered breakfast in the middle of my rap song!

COACH Z AND PEACEY P: R-A-P-S-O-N-G, yes,
Yes, y'all, and we don't flake,

COACH Z: Here comes Tenerence Love with an R&B break!

TENERENCE LOVE: My name is Tenerence Love,
Plus my name is Tenerence Love,
Divided by my name is Tenerence Love,
Equals my name is Tenerence Love!
Remainder three!

COACH Z AND PEACEY P: R-A-P-S-O-N-G, yes,
Y'all, and we don't stap,
Coach Z and Peacey P cold rappity-rap!

R-A-P-S-O-N-G, yes,
Y'all, and we don't stap,
Coach Z, Peacey P

{The music and cartoon stop. Zoom out to a view of Coach Z and The Cheat in front of The Cheat's computer.}

COACH Z: The Chort, that was amazing! It's gonna rock it to the bottom of the B.E.T. charts!

THE CHEAT: {The Cheat noises}

COACH Z: Oh, your payment. How's about a nice slice of chin strap pizza? {holds up said pizza slice}

{The Cheat sinks out of view, making sick-sounding The Cheat noises.}

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