portrait

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ally rich and money<br />
ally rich and money<br />
s still very valuable.
s still very valuable.
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</blockquote>
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* The right side of the newspaper reads:
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<blockquote class="email" style="background-image:none;border:2px solid black;background:#ffffff;color:#000;width:300px">
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<big><big>G</big>igantic cell phone</big><br />
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making a 4th quart<br />
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comeback as the the "it'<br />
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toy of the Decemberwe<br />
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season. "Who wants to<br />
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put a phone in their poc<br />
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when you can carry aro<br />
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a seperate suitcase just<br />
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for a portable, wireless<br />
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mobile, take-anywhere<br />
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cellular telephone. Ma<br />
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analysts predict all the<br />
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cool kids will be luggi<br />
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these stylish jobbies fr<br />
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prom dance to soccer<br />
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practice in 2006.<br />
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&nbsp;"I want a cell phone<br />
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that is quite large," say<br />
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the sleepy rabbit.<br />
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The technology sector is anticipating<br />
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other woodland creatures to be amon<br />
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early adopters of the new technology
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</blockquote>
</blockquote>
</blockquote>

Revision as of 04:44, 5 December 2005

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Done by a Deutsch Master

Strong Bad tries to make a portrait of himself.

Cast (in order of appearance): Strong Bad, The Cheat, Homestar Runner, Strong Mad

Places: Computer Room, Strong Mad's Room, Strong Bad's Basement

Contents

Transcript

This section is in progress.
Another user is currently adding or changing substantial content. As a courtesy, until this tag is removed please do not edit this section unless absolutely necessary. You are still welcome to edit other parts of the page.
To the person working: This tag is not a claim to the section that you can leave and come back to later. You are expected to be adding or changing content right now. You should save your progress periodically (about every 15 to 30 minutes) or indicate in some way that you are still working, or else the tag should be removed so that other users may edit the section.

STRONG BAD: Hey everybody, it's a musical Strong Bad Email this week! {presses enter} {singing} Doo doo doo Dear Strong Bad, oh I was wondering—{stops singing} I can't keep this up.

STRONG BAD: {typing} Guess what? Nobody calls you Coolio da Fabio (aka quit making up nicknames for yourself.) I'm just gonna call you Dealin' Burgers, which I assume doubles as an accurate job description.

{clears screen}

STRONG BAD: Moving onwardly, I suppose my greatness is worthy of portraiture. Perhaps one done by a Deutsch Master.

{Cut to a portrait.}

STRONG BAD: The kind that are always getting stolen or vandalized by art bandits.

{The Cheat appears from the top and paints on the portrait with spraypaint.}

STRONG BAD: {not typing} Thanks little buddy; now it's worth something.

THE CHEAT: {makes noises like Strong Bad is welcome}

{Cut back to the Lappy.}

STRONG BAD: {resumes typing} Or what about one of those black and white ink portraits you see in all the rich-guy newspapers.

{Cut to a rich-guy newspaper}

STRONG BAD: Well apparently they're not rich enough to afford any color. Or even solid lines... Just a bunch of dots and dashes. I look like Morse Code. {imitates speaking as though in Morse Code} Dah dah dah dee dee dee... I-I a-am h-holding a-a r-re-eal-ly o-old c-cell ph-phone.

{Cut back to the Lappy. The screen has cleared}

STRONG BAD: {typing} Oops. No. Hey, I got it! A painting of such greatness demands only the finest materials. And what could be finer than black velvet in a cheap imitation wood frame? It would be showcased—

{Cut to the velvet painting}

STRONG BAD: —in only the fanciest double-wide trailers. Oh, and look! I finally caught that skunk. I been chasing after that little scamp for—

{The shot suddenly shifts to the right to reveal a poster of a unicorn.}

STRONG BAD: —Whoa! Is that a blacklight poster of a unicorn riding a snowmobile?! Now that is some esteemed company.

{A Cold One flies at the lamp and shatters it.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Thanks for breaking my moose lamp.

{Cut back to the Lappy.}

STRONG BAD: {typing} Unfortunately, I don't know anyone with a useless Master of Fine Arts degree, so I might have to settle for something a bit more, how you say, made by Strong Mad or The Cheat.

{Cut to The Cheat, who is noisily gnawing Strong Bad's face into a log.}

STRONG BAD: Very... uh, slobbery, The Cheat. This isn't quite what I had in mind when you said "sculpture."

{Music starts playing.}

STRONG BAD: You're really just... goin' to town there, aren't ya?

{Strong Bad stares at The Cheat working for a moment.}

STRONG BAD: I'm gonna just {motioning with his glove} leave you two alone.

{Strong Bad backs away. Cut to Strong Mad's room. Strong Mad is sprinkling glitter over a macaroni picture. Strong Bad walks up.}

STRONG BAD: Oh, nice work, Chef Boy-ar-dee.

{Cut to a close-up of the picture.}

STRONG BAD: Like I couldn't have gone down to the kindergarten and hired a five-year-old to make me one of those. ...Except that that sounds pretty creepy and I'd probably go to jail.

{Cut back to the wide shot.}

STRONG MAD: I WENT FOR YOU!!

{Cut back to the Lappy. Strong Bad sits down.}

STRONG BAD: {typing}

Easter Eggs

  • Click the white card by the portrait by the Deutsch Master to see an "Adventures of Strong Badman" comic book.
  • Click the Keyswordtar at the end to see a printable version of the tank stencil the Cheat used to vandalize the painting.
  • Click Lord Quackingstick at the end to see Strong Bad show off his keyswordtar to Homestar.
{Cut to The Field with Homestar and Strong Bad holding the keyswordtar, his head still in the hole, although it has been broken off from the rest of the portrait.}
STRONG BAD: So that's when I realized I don't even need lamaze classes.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Strong Bad, there's something different about you. Did you get a haircut?
STRONG BAD: No, but I did get this new keyswordtar. Maow, maow, maoooooooow. {falsetto} Keyboard, keyboooooard. {normal} Maow, maow, maooooooooow. {falsetto} Fight some brigands!! {Homestar hlods up a SAAB lighter, Strong Bad's voice returns to normal} Maow Maow, Maoooow-ow-ow-ow-ow-ow-owwowwoww-whammy-barrrrruh.

Fun Facts

Trivia

  • The left side of the newspaper reads:
  • The right side of the newspaper reads:

</blockquote>

Remarks

  • The lighter in the keyswordtar Easter egg is a Saab lighter, as opposed to the usual BMW one.
  • The fours in The Cheat's 4rt b4ndit shirt are another example of Leetspeak in the toons.

Inside References

  • Homestar also thanked someone for breaking his lamp in caper, although it was then a cow lamp.
  • A Strong Badman comic appeared in connection with a "Deutschman" in haircut.
  • The velvet painting of Strong Bad holding the skunk was done by Lem Sportsinterviews.
  • The gnawing pose for The Cheat was last used in personal favorites. In the DVD commentary, The Brothers Chaps mention wanting to use that pose again.

Real-World References

  • Mulligatawny is a kind of soup.
  • The head of the robotank resembles that of a Transformer, quite likely Optimus Prime.
  • Chef Boyardee was an Italian chef who is famous for his canned food franchise.

External Links

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Retrieved from "http://www.hrwiki.org/wiki/portrait"
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