Editing Where's The Cheat?

{{about|Big Toon}} {{for|DVD game|Where's The Cheat? (game)}}
{{toonnav|Big Toon|whereis|The Luau|Parsnips A-Plenty}}
[[Image:Missing Cheat Poster.png|thumb|"What part of 'Meet us at The Stick' didn't he understand?"]]

Strong Bad and his posse can't find The Cheat. Homestar Runner makes Marzipan a sandwich, which she immediately falls in love with and names [[Homestar Jr.]]

'''Cast (in order of appearance):''' {{Film|Homestar Runner}}, {{Film|Marzipan}}, {{Film|Strong Bad}}, {{Film|Pom Pom}}, {{Film|Strong Mad}}, {{Film|Strong Sad}}, {{Film|Bubs|}}, {{Film|Coach Z}}, {{Film|The Goblin}}, {{Film|Homsar}}, {{Film|The Poopsmith}}, {{Film|The King of Town}}, {{Film|The Cheat}}.

'''Places:''' [[Marzipan's House]], [[The Stick]], [[Strong Sad's Room]], [[Bubs' Concession Stand]], [[Coach Z's Locker Room]], [[Spooky Woods]], [[Strong Badia]], [[King of Town's Castle]], [[The King of Town's Grill]]

'''Date: ''' Monday, February 25, 2002

'''Running Time:''' 6:18

'''Page Title:''' Where is the Cheat?

{{dvd|Everything Else, Volume 2}}

== Transcript ==
''{Scene opens with a sesame seed bun with [[Mayonnaise|mayo]] being spread over it. Each time the knife passes over it, the credits displayed on the mayo change. "This is a Homestar Runner Cartoon" "Mike, Craig and Matt wrote it" "Matt and Mike made it" "Matt and Missy did the voices" "its<!-- [sic]--> called: Where's the Cheat?" Zoom out to see Homestar Runner in Marzipan's kitchen making a veggie burger. He puts green olives on top and sticks them on with toothpicks.}''

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' ''{making sound effects for the olives}'' Dik, doing! Dik, sboing! 

''{The sandwich is finished, Homestar lifts it up to marvel at his creation}''

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:'''  Hmm! ''{walks over to Marzipan, who's taking a nap on her couch}'' Hey, stupid! I brought you this stuff! Oh, I mean, I brought you this veggie burger.

''{Marzipan gets up from the couch and Homestar hands her the burger.}''

'''MARZIPAN:''' Oh, thanks, Homestar! ''{looks at the burger}'' Oh! He's just adorable! He's got a little face.

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' Yeah, I thought that was great, too. The olives, um, kinda look like... he has eyes.

'''MARZIPAN:''' Little green eyes with red pupils and a big leafy smile? Homestar, I don't think I'm gonna eat this. He's just too cute!

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' Umm... yeah. It's cute and all, but, um, it's not ''that'' cute.

'''MARZIPAN:''' Oh, yes he is that cute! Aren't you that cute? Aren't you that cute?

''{The phone begins to ring, and continues during the following dialogue.}''

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' Umm... Marzipan? Um, I think your phone... is ringing. Yeah, definitely your phone's ringing.

'''MARZIPAN:''' ''{simultaneously}'' Yes you are. Yes... you... are! Oh yes you are. Now do a little smile for me. Do a smile, that's it. That's it. Oh, I like your lettuce.

''{Cut to Marzipan's Answering Machine.}''

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' Um... are you gonna get that?

'''MARZIPAN:''' ''{answering machine}'' Hi, this is Marzipan. Please leave me a message. ''{beep}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{leaving a message}'' Oh, hey Marzipan. Have you seen The Cheat? Because we can't find him anywhere. Anyways, this is Strong Bad and— uh, ooh, um... ''{clears throat and starts mimicking Homestar's style of speech, poorly}'' I mean this—this is Homestar... Runner. Oh Marzipan... um... I killed Pom Pom!

''{Cut to the stick; Strong Bad, Pom Pom, and Strong Mad are there. Strong Bad is talking on Pom Pom's cell}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Yeah, we're—we were playing badminton in his yard... and I got mad and I killed him! ''{cut back to the answering machine}'' Oh no, I need your help... burying his body...

''{Strong Bad is snickering, cut back to the field}''

'''STRONG BAD:'''  Uh, bring some towels... and some garbage bags... Uh... this is Homestar... 

''{Strong Bad closes the cell phone and tosses it to Pom Pom.}''

'''STRONG BAD:'''  Pom Pom, cell.

''{Pom Pom's body absorbs the cell phone}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{bursts out laughing}'' Bwa ha ha ha! Oh man, that was so great! You guys shoulda heard that man! I pretended to be Homestar, and I said I killed you, Pom Pom! Like, Marzipan's gonna freak out—

'''STRONG MAD:''' THE CHEEEEEAAAAT! Huh?

'''STRONG BAD:''' Oh, The Cheat. Right, right. Pom Pom, cell again.

''{Pom Pom lowers his eyelids in annoyance, bubbles, and gives him the cell again. Strong Bad makes a call and Strong Sad answers.}''

'''STRONG SAD:''' Hello?

'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey wiener. Is The Cheat over there? Don't you guys play Candy Land sometimes or something?

''{Cut to Strong Sad's room.}''

'''STRONG SAD:''' Oh no. The Cheat and I play Jenga on Tuesdays. Tonight is my night to play—

''{Cut back to The Stick.}''

'''STRONG SAD:''' ''{heard from Pom Pom's cell}'' —Caaardinal Sins.

'''STRONG BAD:''' Okay, so The Cheat is not there. Thanks. Bye. ''{hangs up and tosses the cell back to Pom Pom}'' I mean, where could he be, you know? It's like, what part of "Meet us at The Stick" didn't he understand? Well, I guess we should go look for him. Come on, guys.

''{They all walk off and arrive at Bubs' Concession Stand. Bubs is going over "inventory," handwritten on a piece of paper.}''

'''BUBS:''' ''{mumbling}'' &mdash;see here... twenty-four... seventeen... ''{normal}'' Hey you guys! This isn't another ''{bobs his head sideways and speaks in a groovy tone}'' shake-down, is it?

'''STRONG BAD:''' Naw, man. We're just looking for The Cheat. You seen him?

'''BUBS:''' Well, let's see here. ''{goes through his inventory}'' Candy bars, popcorns, ketchup, catsup... ''{arrives at "cheats... 0"}'' Uh, nope! ''{raises his arms up and shrugs}'' I'm fresh outta Cheats.

''{Cut to Marzipan's living room, using the veggie-burger as a scene change a la Batman logo in the old Batman show. She's talking to the burger, while Homestar is standing there in a daze, slowly tipping over.}''

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' ''{while Marzipan talks}'' Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhh....

'''MARZIPAN:''' Somebody needs a name! Who needs a name? You need a name, that's who! I think I'll call you Homestar Junior. Homestar Junior! ''{Homestar falls over}'' Do a smile for me, Homestar Junior! Who's the cutest, Homestar Junior?

''{Cut to Coach Z's locker room, using the same veggie-burger scene change. Bubs, Strong Bad, Strong Mad, and Pom Pom are facing the Coach.}''

'''COACH Z:''' Sorry, boys, I haven't seen The Chort. Though I have caught him sleepin' in that far locker there from time to time.

''{Strong Bad goes up to the locker and opens it up.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Lessee what we got in there. Nope, he's not here. Though I see he ''has'' been cheating on his New Year's Resolution. ''{pulls out a pack of cigarettes}'' Though I can't really blame him. You know, because he's The Cheat.

''{Strong Mad holds up a signed picture of The Cheat that he gave to Strong Mad. It's signed "To Strong Mad, You are rad! —The Cheat" Strong Mad starts crying.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Don't worry, big guy. We'll cut to a montage. I mean, find The Cheat.

''{Cut to a montage. Pom Pom puts up posters of The Cheat, titled "Have You Seen The Cheat???? Ht: 1 ft. 2 in. Wt: 18 lbs." He then bounces off. Strong Mad walks through the Halloween area. He overturns the [[Gremlin]], revealing the Goblin underneath.}''

'''STRONG MAD:''' The Cheat?

''{The Goblin starts dancing. Another logo transition is shown, this time using one of the posters Pom Pom was putting up. Then cut to Strong Sad's room. He's playing Connect Four.}''

'''STRONG SAD:''' Okay, your turn.

''{Cut to the other side of the table, where Homsar is sitting.}''

'''HOMSAR:''' Oh no! You shanked my Jengaship!

'''STRONG SAD:''' ''{slight pause}'' I shanked your Jengaship? We're playing Connect Four!

''{Bubs walks in.}''

'''BUBS:''' Hey you guys. Where The Cheat is at?

'''STRONG SAD:''' Oh, I don't know. It's just us two.

'''HOMSAR:''' AaAaAaAaAaAaA! Hey, Tubbs! I just lost my Jengajam.

'''BUBS:''' ''{stares for a second, then responds}'' Don't you talk to me.

''{Bubs walks off. Cut to Strong Badia. Strong Bad walks in.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' The Cheat? The Cheat! ''{His voice echoes as the wind howls. He groans.}'' How's it going, Tire?

''{Cut to The Poopsmith and Coach Z near The Poopsmith's pile.}''

'''COACH Z:''' So you haven't seen him then? ''{The Poopsmith shakes his head and shrugs his arms}'' Okay. Though I see you still got your pile of whatsit there.

''{The Poopsmith nods.}''

'''THE KING OF TOWN:''' Doo hoo hoo!

''{Coach Z and The Poopsmith turn to look and the camera follows them, cutting to the King of Town approaching his grill with a steak.}''

'''THE KING OF TOWN:''' Doo dee doo doo doo! Doo hoo hoo hoo!

''{He lifts the cover of the grill to find The Cheat sleeping there}''

'''THE KING OF TOWN:''' ''{his crown pops up in surprise}'' Oof! That little yellow thing! Wake up!

''{Cut back to Coach Z.}''

'''COACH Z:''' ''{points his left arm out in alarm)'' Hey look! The King's gone mad with power! He's gonna eat The Chort!! ''{zooms to the rescue}'' YEEEOOOOORRRPS!

''{Coach Z leaps onto the King of Town's back, clinging to his head. The impact sends the King's crown flying, and it lands on Coach Z's head, who continues to cling as the King of Town runs back and forth. Strong Mad steps into view}'' 

'''COACH Z:''' I got him, Strong Mad!

'''THE KING OF TOWN:''' Woo hoo! Woo hoo hoo! I'm absolutely being assaulted! Woo hoo hoo hoo!

''{Strong Mad cocks his fist back and brings it forward, punching the King of Town (with Coach Z still on him), and they both go flying into the wall of the King's castle. Strong Bad approaches.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Hang on, everybody! The King of Town was not going to eat The Cheat.

'''COACH Z:''' Ooh jeez! Sorry about that there, Kingy.

''{Coach Z and the King of Town walk up to the grill, and Pom Pom arrives from the opposite direction}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' No, no, no, no. That's where The Cheat ''lives''. That's his house!

'''COACH Z:''' Wait a minute! The Chort lives in the King of Town's grill, but you didn't think to check there before now?

'''STRONG BAD:''' Uh... Well... yeah. I mean, it's a really complicated story. It all started...

''{Marzipan arrives with the veggie-burger.}''

'''MARZIPAN:''' Hey guys! Homestar Junior's talking now!

'''STRONG BAD:''' Who?

'''MARZIPAN:''' He said, "Put that freakin' sandwich down!"

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' ''{from behind Marzipan, angry}'' No, it was me!

''{Marzipan holds up Homestar Jr. so that it blocks Homestar's head from view, making it look like the sandwich has a body}''

'''MARZIPAN:''' I know it was, sweetie!

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' No, me! Homestar Runner! ''{waggles his body}''

'''MARZIPAN:''' You're Homestar Junior, remember?

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' ''Will you put that freakin' sandwich down?!''

'''MARZIPAN:''' There, he said it again! I'm so proud of you! Who's the best, Homestar Junior?

''{She continues to baby-talk Homestar Junior under Homestar's dialogue as the scene cuts to a silhouetted wide shot. The screen slowly fades to black.}''

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' Somebody, can I get some help here? Strong Bad? ''{Strong Bad shrugs.}'' Would someone talk some sense into this woman? 

''{Fade to black.}''

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' King, you wanna eat that sandwich? ''{music cuts out}'' Somebody eat that sandwich...

''{After a pause, fade into a commercial for "The Homestar Jr."}''

'''ANNOUNCER:''' Introducing the Homestar Junior. For a limited time only, certain children get prizes. Pay 99 cents.

== Fun Facts ==
===Explanations===
*To be shanked is prison-speak for being stabbed, usually with a homemade weapon.

===Trivia===
*This was the first big 'toon on the site featuring [[The Brothers Chaps]]' then-new style of animation.
*The cookie jar in Marzipan's kitchen is modeled after [[Trivia Time]], Pom Pom's dog that never saw the light of day in any cartoons.
*This toon marks the beginning of Strong Sad's more or less fully developed "delicate" voice. There were still some remnants of his "tired" voice in [[The Best Decemberween Ever]].  
*This is the first time Homsar is acknowledged by a character other than Strong Bad.
*This cartoon marks the debut of [[The Stick]].
*The ring of Marzipan's phone is default ringin.wav file in Microsoft Windows (until Windows XP, when it was replaced by an electronic ringing sound rather than a bell).
*This is the first regular toon to feature every main character.
*The announcer who says, "Introducing the Homestar Junior..." was [[Mike Chapman|Mike]].
*The following is hidden in the code if one views the source:<blockquote style="font-family: monospace">"A Jorb HOME VISITORS Well Done" written, directed, drawn and animated by the Brothers Chaps all voices by Matt Chapman 0 1 2 3 4 Job vs. JAERB "A" "E" "O" JOERGHB! the businessman's  job  is giving the business JOB the construction worker's job  is to smash things the poopsmith's  job is obvious "job" - 285,194 times ghetto blastro "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times "job" - 285,194 times the end</blockquote>
**This was automatically generated by Flash, which automatically puts all the text from a movie into the HTML file for the search engines. This text is from [[A Jorb Well Done]], which suggests they simply edited the HTML file for that cartoon for this one. Strangely, though, the A Jorb Well Done HTML file doesn't have this text.
*This is the first appearance of The Goblin outside of a Halloween cartoon; indeed, it is his only non-Halloween appearance to date, with the possible exception of the graveyard-themed [[Main Page 7]].
*According to the credits, this cartoon was co-written by [[Craig Zobel]].
*Strong Bad's line "We'll cut to a montage" is another instance of [[Breaking The Fourth Wall|breaking the fourth wall]].
*In the last scene, the King of Town's crown comes off his head near the grill, but it disappears later.

===Remarks===
[[Image:cheat.jpg|thumb|?taehc eht serehW]]
*In the beginning, Homestar Junior's toothpicks appear from [[hammerspace|nowhere]].
*When the The King of Town is walking toward his grill, a flyer for The Cheat is seen stapled to his stone castle wall, which is impossible, since staples could never go through stone. However, it's possible that the castle may not be made of stone.
*The old pop-up menu appears on this cartoon (at the bottom). All the buttons still work.  Only this toon, [[A Jorb Well Done]], [[Chinese Food Toons Menu]], [[Broken Tandy Menu]], the [[Strong Bad Email#Strong Bad Email Menus|Strong Bad Email Vacation Menu]], and the [[Yearbook Character Page]] seem to still have it.
*Bubs's "fresh outta Cheats" is a rare use of The Cheat's name without an [[integral article]].
*The Cheat apparently prefers "[[Trophy Lights]]" brand [[cigarettes]].
*Marzipan apparently doesn't have any legs. This was previously revealed in [[The House That Gave Sucky Treats]].
*Bubs' Stand has a different design in this toon.
*The [[Wikipedia:Connect Four|Connect Four]] board seen in this cartoon is only 4-by-5. A real Connect Four board is 6-by-7.
*Apparently, although The Cheat can't speak English, he can still write in it.
*When Strong Mad picks up the photograph of The Cheat, tears fall out of both of his eyes at the same time, the one falling out of his left eye <!-- the viewer's right --> seems to steer around his mouth.
*If viewed in the Flash file, a backwards "Where's the Cheat?" sign is seen "behind the black" when the King of Town is walking up to his grill.   

===Goofs===
[[Image:Strongbadweirdeyes.PNG|thumb|Look closely...]]
[[Image:3armedz.png|thumb|Coach Z has more than two probl-arms.]]
*Right before The King of Town comes up when Coach Z is talking to The Poopsmith, Coach Z quickly changes his hand gesture. Apparently, The Brothers Chaps accidentally left the graphic for his other gesture there for a couple frames.
*Bubs's legs are missing when he is talking with Homsar and Strong Sad.
*During certain parts of the cartoon, one of Strong Bad's eyes is significantly larger than the other.  This is likely an artifact from the shots where Strong Bad's head is tilted away from the camera, making one eye (correctly) appear larger than the other.
*When Strong Sad and Homsar are playing Connect Four, the piece that Strong Sad puts in is not seen later.
*When Homestar mentions that the olives on Homestar Junior do in fact look like eyes, his eyes are reversed from the previous shot.
*The title has the phrase "its called" which should actually be "it's called".
*The first time Strong Bad returns the cell phone to Pom Pom, the orange creases in Pom Pom's surface where the cell phone is absorbed don't completely disappear; they fade to almost nothing, but are still visible for the remainder of the shot.
*As Homestar is walking out of Marzipan's kitchen, his shirt changes to the old magenta color. It stays this color up to the close-up of Homestar Junior, and remains the newer bright red for the remainder of the toon.
*The last frame shows that Homestar Junior is available at "parcipitating" locations (though this may be intentional).
*After Strong Mad punches the King of Town and Coach Z towards the wall, the King's crown falls off. However, it is not there when they return to that shot.
*The color of the [[whatsit]] on The Poopsmith's gloves does not match the color of the pile of whatsit.
*When Coach Z and the Poopsmith turn to face The King of Town, Coach Z's first lower arm position fails to disappear when the new one appears, and even flies off of him when the camera shifts. This is easier to see when watched frame-by-frame. The goof lasts 7 frames.

===Inside References===
*"Where The Cheat is at?" is a reference to "[[Where My Hat Is At?]]", an old Homestar "book" that was "Homestar's World Wide Web Debut".
*Strong Bad leaving prank calls on [[Marzipan's Answering Machine]] is a running gag.
*Coach Z thinks The King of Town is going to [[Characters Being Eaten|eat]] The Cheat.

===Real-World References=== 
*[[Wikipedia:Candy Land|Candy Land]] is a real board game.
*Strong Sad and Homsar play [[Wikipedia:Connect Four|Connect Four]].
*"You shanked my Jengaship" is a reference to the games [[Wikipedia:Jenga|Jenga]] and [[Wikipedia:Battleship (game)|Battleship]].

===Fast Forward===
*The music used in the montage was later used in the email [[little animal]].
*Strong Bad said the title "Where's The Cheat" later in the email [[for kids]].
**[[Where's The Cheat? (game)|Where's The Cheat?]] also becomes a game on the [[Everything Else, Volume 3]] DVD.
*Coach Z's pose grabbing The King of Town was used later in the email [[virus]].

== DVD Version ==
*The title card has the phrase "it's called 'Where's The Cheat?'" spelled correctly.

== External Links ==
*[[HR:whereis.html|watch "Where's The Cheat?"]]
*[[HR:whereis.swf|view the Flash file for "Where's The Cheat?"]]

[[Category:Toons]]