your funeral

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Strong Bad Email #168
watch the movies from work
File:Sbemail168.png
"Shut up, lady! Peaceful is not how I roll!"

Strong Bad makes plans for his funeral.

Cast (in order of appearance): Strong Bad, Strong Sad, Old Lady, Homestar Runner, Marzipan, Taranchula, The Cheat, Strong Mad, Bubs, Coach Z, Pom Pom, The King of Town

Places: Computer Room, Visitation Room, Marzipan's House, The Field

Computer: Lappy 486

Date: March 12, 2007

Running Time: 3:56

Page Title: Lappy 486

Contents

Transcript

STRONG BAD: {singing} Strong Bad, how you gonna check that email? With my boxing gloves, with my boxing gloves!

STRONG BAD: {typing} Oh man, Addendum. My funeral's going to be off all of the following: the hook, the chain, the charts, the grid, and most importantly, the wagon. {clears screen} First, I'll have to deal with the most difficult decision a newlydead faces: what to do with my stinking, rotten remains. I don't want to be just lying there surrounded by sweet-smelling flowers—

{Cut to Strong Bad with his eyes blacked out and paler skin lying surrounded by flowers in a coffin with the word "COUGHIN'" on the side. Organ music is heard. Behind him is a person wearing a ducky shirt.}

STRONG BAD: {voiceover} —and sweat-smelling followers.

OLD LADY: Oh, he looks so peaceful.

STRONG BAD: {turns his head} Shut up, lady! Peaceful is not how I roll.

{Cut back to the Lappy}

STRONG BAD: That's why I'm gonna be taxidoimied! Nothing sums up my life's achievements quite like my stuffed corpse—

{Cut to a white background. Strong Bad is standing on a log that says "Yosemite National Park" and holding a cougar}

STRONG BAD: —suplexing a cougar. {high voice} Mrow! {normally} It'll be kept in a place of honor for {fade to Marzipan's house} all the world to want to make out with.

{Homestar Runner enters from the right with a brown hat and jacket; he hangs them on the Strong Bad statue.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Marzipan, I'm home!

MARZIPAN: {leaning in from the left} Did you find the DNA evidence?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Not yet, but I'm getting close!

{Cut back to the Lappy}

STRONG BAD: Well, maybe I'll just preserve myself fetal pig-style in a mason jar filled with the salty tears—

{Cut to a jar filled with a liquid looking like water with a mostly-preserved Strong Bad inside. The corpse is missing several pieces of flesh and has an exposed ribcage.}

STRONG BAD: —of all the heartbroken private school girls that will pine-uh for me-uh.

{Cut back to the Lappy}

STRONG BAD: That way, there'll be something left to re-animate once the zombie uprising cometh. In 2046. On March 31st. At 2:03 pm. {clears screen} And while I'm a big fan of the classic {sings to the tune of Chopin's funeral march} "dunh-dunh-da-dunh-Dunh-da-dunh-da-dunh-da-dunh," {normally} my funeral dirge would be written and performed by Taranchula!!

{Cut to the Field. Strong Sad is wearing a black tie and carrying the jar containing Strong Bad's remains. Metal music begins to play.}

TARANCHULA: Wo, ho, ho, ho, ho!

{Pan out; Strong Sad and the jar are silhouetted and The Cheat is following behind, whipping Strong Sad with a whip. Strong Mad and Bubs follow.}

TARANCHULA: {singing} Put him in a jar! Put him in a jar! Puthiminajar!

{Cut back to the Lappy}

STRONG BAD: Since I'm not very confident in Strong Mad or The Cheat's public speaking abilities, I'll pre-record my own eulogy and have it played back on 5 boomboxes—

{Cut back to the field: five boomboxes, including the booOOMbox and one made of cardboard, are stacked between two large vases with roses in them.}

STRONG BAD: —stacked on top of each other!

STRONG BAD: {playing off of boom boxes} Greetings, blubbering masses! Pull yourselves together! And turn off the snot works! We are gathered here to di— {electronic noises}

COACH Z: {playing off of boom boxes} I hope I'm not recording over anything important! OK, drap it! {rhythmically} Coach, Z, Coach, Z, 1, 2—

{Cut to Bubs and Coach Z wearing ties and looking sad. While Coach Z's voice continues, Bubs glares at Coach Z, who begins to dance without changing his expression.}

COACH Z: —3, 4, I said Coach, Z, Coach, Z, 1, 2—

{Cut to Homestar Runner in a black suit and propeller cap standing behind a pulpit between two vases of roses.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {sadly} Thank you, Strong Bad. {Coach Z's music is replaced with organ music} And now, a reading from the book of phone. {places and opens a phone book on the pulpit} Chapter 16, {turns page} Pizza Places. Aardvark Pizza. Abraham Lincoln's Pizza Cabin. {turns page} Acupuncture and Pizza: {voice begins to waver} Open late, free delivery! {closes and puts phone book away} And now, Strong Sad will perform an interpretive dance based on his brother's life.

{A gong sounds, followed by drums. Cut to Strong Sad dancing onto the scene wearing a leotard. Strong Sad and the music stop at the sound of shattering glass; some shards of glass fly in from the left. Cut to Strong Bad's corpse, which has broken open the jar. His eyes remain black and his body disfigured. The audience gasps. Strong Bad shakes his head dry.}

STRONG BAD'S CORPSE: {speaking in a distorted voice} Sorry, everybody. Funeral's over. Not even death can stop me from stopping my leotarded brother prancing around in my honor.

{Cut back to Strong Sad}

STRONG SAD: But you never got to see my Chaup au Fan!

{Cut to Strong Bad's corpse}

STRONG BAD'S CORPSE: You keep your chappy thong to yourself, Mister!

{Cut back to the Lappy}

STRONG BAD: Hordes of locusts and famine got nothing on the sight of Strong Sad dancing interpretively. So, in order to spare the world, I guess I can just never die. Okay! Man, I hope the zombies still let me fight on their side. I've got my own tattered jeans and mouthful of grape jelly. Anyone? {softer and with progressively smaller text} Zombies? Jelly? Grapity?

{The Paper comes down.}

Easter Eggs

CHAUP AU FAN!!
  • Click on "Bibendum" to see a picture of Strong Sad as the Michelin Man (aka Bibendum) with a caption that reads "Chaup Au Fan".
  • Click on the phone book after Homestar says "Acupuncture and Pizza" to see an ad for it.
  • At the end of the email, click on the word "zombies" (the first occurrence) to see a clip of Pom Pom and Strong Sad in their 2046 forms.
{Cut to a scene with a future Pom Pom and Strong Sad in a purple room with cardboard boxes and flickering lights. Both are smoking cigars. Pom Pom has a gray buzz cut and is wearing an ammo belt. Strong Sad's arms are muscular and he is covered with scars. The phrase "THE YEAR 2046..." is subtitled onscreen. Heavy metal music is heard in the background.}
FUTURE STRONG SAD: {deep voice} Fall back. The zombies have broken through our defenses!
{Cut to a pale orange room with Strong Bad standing in front of an open door. Strong Bad has stuck part of a brain on the left side of his head and is wearing ripped denim jeans.}
STRONG BAD: BLAUGHRG! {grape jelly oozes out of his mouth}
{Cut back to Strong Sad and Pom Pom.}
FUTURE STRONG SAD: We need to activate the doomsday device. {zoom in on Strong Sad's face} Get the leotard!
{Taranchula is heard singing "Puthiminajar!"}

Fun Facts

Explanations

  • "Off the wagon" is a phrase meaning a recovering alcoholic has started drinking again.
  • A suplex is an offensive move often used in professional, olympic, and collegiate wrestling where a wrestler essentially flips their opponent over their shoulders.
  • Taxidermy is the practice of preserving dead animals (usually sport game shot by a hunter) by stuffing them full of sand or sawdust to retain their natural posture for display as trophies.
  • An addendum is "something added or to be added, especially a supplement to a written work."
  • A leotard is a one-piece dance outfit or a swimsuit.

Trivia

  • This email was actually available several hours before the official "New Strong Bad Email" button appeared. It was accessible by clicking on the "email soon" button or by typing in the URL.
  • This email originally did not have a visible loading screen at the beginning or the Bibendum Easter egg. Both were added several hours after the email was released.
  • The tape in the booOOMbox reads "my COOLogy."
  • "Chaup Au Fan" is intended to sound like French, but doesn't really mean anything. It probably refers to the French names for many ballet dance steps.

Remarks

A reading from the book of phone.
  • Since P is the 16th letter in the English alphabet, it makes sense for pizza places to be in chapter 16 of the phone book.
  • The Easter Egg is the first time we see Strong Sad with visible teeth. Or at least in one incarnation of his.
  • When Strong Sad carries the jar, the liquid inside disobeys the laws of physics: it ought to be level with the horizon, but is at the same angle as the jar.

Goofs

  • When Strong Sad is carrying the jar before the funeral, the image of Strong Bad as a corpse has been reversed (the ribs on Strong Bad's right side are exposed rather than the ones on his left side) compared to the other two times he's shown like that (on the table and when he breaks out of the jar).
  • When Strong Sad is carrying the jar, Strong Bad's leg bones are visible through the rips at his knees, but when he breaks out, there is skin on both legs.
  • The first shot in Strong Sad's Easter egg shows 2046 Strong Sad with scars on his body and no belly button. However, his body in the close-up shot has a belly button and no scars.
  • One pixel's worth of Homestar's eyes is visible when he closes his eyes as he reads his eulogy, at the bottom of where his left eye is when it is open. The pixel blinks at the normal Homestar rate.

Inside References

  • This is the fourth email in a row mentioning DNA Evidence.
  • This is another mention of Strong Bad typing with boxing gloves on.
  • The fat man at Strong Bad's funeral is wearing a duckie shirt.
  • The lady commenting on Strong Bad's peacefulness and Strong Bad saying, "Shut up, lady!" is a reference to bottom 10, when a lady with a similar voice commented on the "desserts with dangerous names", with the same response by Strong Bad.
  • Strong Bad performing a suplex on the cougar is another example of a professional wrestling move.
  • This is another reference to Prancing.
  • The cigar in 2046 Strong Sad's mouth is another reference to Smoking. Strong Sad also appears with a cigar in the Bibendum Easter egg.
  • Abraham Lincoln's Pizza Cabin is another mention of both pizza and Presidents.
  • Strong Sad has the same carefully arranged dinner plate in the Bibendum Easter egg as in looking old.
  • Strong Bad's comment about his party being "off the wagon" is another reference to alcohol.
  • This email heavily involves death.
  • The 2046 version of Pom Pom has the same style of hair as he did in Halloween Potion-ma-jig.
  • Strong Bad's desire to record his own Eulogy alludes to his previously expressed doubts regarding the coherency of The Cheat's and Strong Mad's speech in cheat talk.

Real-World References

  • The Bibendum Easter egg is a direct reference to the classic ad in which Michelin introduced Bibendum, later to become the company's mascot.
  • Yosemite is a national park located in California.
  • The classic funeral march Strong Bad sings is from the third movement of Frédéric Chopin's Piano Sonata No. 2 in B flat minor, op. 35.
  • Abraham Lincoln is known to have grown up in a one-room log cabin.
  • Coach Z's dance and facial expression are reminiscent of Michael Jackson's music video for Thriller, which also featured Zombies.
  • Strong Bad recording his own Eulogy is similar to an episode of the popular podcast series, Ask a Ninja, in the episode "Last Words", because he asks people to pre-record their final words.

External Links

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