underlings

From Homestar Runner Wiki

Revision as of 21:47, 13 February 2020

"Your tiny bathing suit demeans us all!"

Strong Bad explains how to tell others about embarrassing social mistakes.

Cast (in order of appearance): Strong Bad, Strong Sad, Strong Mad, Coach Z, Homestar Runner

Places: Computer Room, Bathroom of the Brothers Strong, Strong Sad's Room, Swimming Pool, The Field, Basement of the Brothers Strong (Easter egg)

Computer: Lappy 486

Date: Monday, May 7, 2007

Running Time: 3:11

Page Title: Lappy 486

DVD: strongbad_email.exe Disc Six

Transcript

STRONG BAD: {singing} My email song! Where would I be without my email song? {brings up the email}

subject: Handling Smelly Underling?

Dear Strong Bad,
I am a manager and I have been told I must talk to one
of my underlings about their stench. As the foremost
expert in dealing with smelly underlings, I ask you, what is
the best way to go about this? I wish to do this with
some tact & professionalism.
Sincerely,
PlasticDiverGuy
Dartmouth, Nova Scotia

{Strong Bad pronounces each word in the greeting separately, with short deliberate pauses between them. He pronounces "Dartmouth" as two separate words, and "Scotia" phonetically as SKO-tee-uh.}

STRONG BAD: {typing} Man, that show Nova is boring, but I'd watch a show called Dartmouth anyday. {clears screen} Now lemme tell ya PastyDeadGuy, you came to the right man. I've got so many underlings, I've had to deal with nearly every awkward social situation under the awkward social sun. I'm an expoit! {clears screen} Firstly, nothing says tact and professionalism like sending a subtle hint with a hilarious novelty t-shirt. So in your situation, you could just start wearing a shirt that has like,

{Cut to a blank T-shirt}

STRONG BAD: {voiceover} —some kinda—

{A scientist holding a test tube appears on the shirt.}

STRONG BAD: {voiceover} —science person on it, with a clothespin—

{A clothespin appears on the scientist's nose.}

STRONG BAD: {voiceover} —on his nose, and underneath it says: "You Reek-A!"

{"You Reek-A!" appears on the shirt. Cut back to the Lappy}

STRONG BAD: {typing} That way, your smelly underling, or smunderling, can get the message from across the room, and you can safely stay out of stink's reach.

{Cut to Strong Bad in the bathroom, reading a newspaper titled "Da News Papes". He looks up.}

STRONG BAD: You know, I think I'd probably watch a TV show called "Stink's Reach", too.

{He looks back down. Cut back to the Lappy.}

STRONG BAD: {typing} Secondly, nothing says tact and professionalism like slowly revealing a sensitive topic to a friend or loved one—

{Cut to Strong Sad, drawing on a piece of paper with a pencil.}

STRONG BAD: {voiceover} —with a clever connect-the-dots puzzle.

{Cut to a closeup of the paper. It's a crocodile wearing sunglasses, holding a sign that reads "WE'RE GOING TO NEED YOU TO FLUSH TWICE!". The connect-the-dots portion is only the rectangular outline of the sign. Strong Sad stops drawing.}

STRONG SAD: What is he trying to say to me with this cryptic message? {taps the pencil twice on "cryptic"}

{Cut back to the Lappy.}

STRONG BAD: {typing} Furthermore, nothing says pact and trofesssionalism like breaking tough news to someone with a reverse sunburn—

{Cut to the pool, slowly zooming in. A sunburned Strong Mad faces away from the pool, which Coach Z is in.}

STRONG BAD: {voiceover} —on your brother's giant, square, billboard-sized back!

{Strong Mad lowers his singlet revealing his back which reads "your tiny bathing suit demeans us ALL!" Cut to a closeup.}

COACH Z: {slowly} Your tiny bathing suit demeans us all.

{Cut to Coach Z.}

COACH Z: Aw, fine then! I'll take it orf!

{He reaches underwater and pulls out a very small pink g-string. The water turns black around him, accompanied by an odd humming noise. Cut back to behind Strong Mad.}

STRONG MAD: PUT IT BACK ON! PUT IT BACK ON!

{Cut back to the Lappy.}

STRONG BAD: {typing} Lastly, nothing says tact and professionalism like a hidden message written in condiments.

{Cut to a picnic. Homestar Runner is sitting at the table. Strong Bad is wearing an oven mitt and holding a plate with a hot dog with his right hand, and holding a bottle of ketchup in his left. Some ketchup has spilled on the ground. More hot dogs can be seen on a grill behind him.}

STRONG BAD: Here ya go, chumpion!

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {taking the hot dog; something small and green is visible in his mouth.} Ooh! Thanks, grillmasta!

{Cut to the picnic table as Homestar puts the hot dog down. It has "you've had that piece" written on it in ketchup.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: You've had that piece—

{The camera pans to another hot dog, with "of cilantro" written on in mustard.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: —of cilantro—

{The camera pans to a hamburger without its upper bun. "stuck between your teeth" is written in ketchup.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: —stuck between your teeth—

{The camera pans yet again to a waffle with "since we ate at that mexican restaurant" with an arrow written in syrup.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: —since we ate at that Mexican restaurant—

{The camera pans again to three pieces of sushi with "2" "wks" and "ago" written on them in wasabi.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: —two weeks ago.

{Cut to a closeup of Homestar, who has a small piece of cilantro stuck in his mouth}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Two weeks?!... TEETH?!

{Cut to the Lappy.}

STRONG BAD: {typing, in a slightly high-pitched voice and in a forced manner} In conclusion, these are just some of the many things that nothing says tact and professionalism like. I hope you have enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it. If elected class president, I can't promise you Coke in the water fountains, but I can promise a hard-worker that will make a difference. And try to get Mrs. Hardmaster fired.

{He quickly clears the screen, while shaking his head.}

STRONG BAD: {typing, speaking normally} Whoa! It's like I regressed back to the fifth grade there. And the golden days of the five-paragraph essay. Well, good luck with your smunderling, PranceyDirtGirl. I gotta get started making those 'You Reek-A' t-shirts. Those things are gonna be awesome!

{The Paper comes down.}

Easter Eggs

Now including every awkward social situation!

• When Strong Bad types "awkward social sun", click that phrase to see an "Awkward Social Sun" CD.
• When Strong Bad first types "smunderling", click that word to see a description of this creature:

SMUNDERLING

All Smundy wants to do is be your
friend. He appears at office
parties & in enchanted caverns
at random. Very vulnerable to
harsh truths and Discs of Healing.

FREQUENCY: Rare
INTELLIGENCE: Low to middlin'
ARMOR CLASS: +8

• At the end, click "awesome!" to see a clip of the Stink's Reach show.

{In Strong Bad's basement, looking at his TV. Music plays, and pull in slowly on a sign reading "You are now entering Stink's Reach", with stink lines drawn above it.}

NARRATOR: In a town called "Stink's Reach", no one's record is clean.

ANNOUNCER 1: Tuesdays at 8:30.

{"Tuesdays @ 8:30" appears at the bottom of the screen, then cut through static to a screen reading "We now return to Dartmouth". The O in "Dartmouth" is a stylized mouth, with darts flying out of it.}

ANNOUNCER 2: We now return to Dartmouth!

{Cut to a shot of Strong Bad sleeping on the couch, with the TV going behind him.}

TV CHARACTER: Dartmouth! He's getting away!

DARTMOUTH: Stand clear. I know what to do.

{Sounds are heard of someone retching, and a dart flying and hitting a piece of wood}

VILLAIN: Ow! Pointy!

STRONG BAD: {incomprehensible mumbles} Lost... Vikings... {more incomprehensible mumbles}

Fun Facts

Explanations

• The five-paragraph essay is composed of an intro paragraph, three body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Essays of this type are commonly used throughout late elementary and middle school. This email roughly follows the five-paragraph essay format, but uses four body paragraphs (T-shirt, Connect-the-Dots, Billboard Back and Condiment Writing) instead of three.
• "Pact and trofessionalism" is a spoonerism. The spoonerism in this case switches the initial letters in two words of a phrase, so "tact and professionalism" becomes "pact and trofesssionalism". The third s is not part of the spoonerism; it was simply a typo.
• Cilantro is the leaf portion of the coriander plant. It is often used in Mexican, Southwestern, Indian, and Southeast Asian dishes, both for flavor and as a garnish.

Trivia

• This email was sent by wiki user PlasticDiverGuy.
• The newspaper reads:

• This email is the first email since looking old to not mention DNA evidence.
• After typing "And try to get Mrs. Hardmaster fired", Strong Bad originally typed "for child abuse" just before clearing the screen. This was later removed for unknown reasons.
• This is the last fully functional appearance of The Paper, discounting Strong Bad's Cool Game for Attractive People.
• The summary for the Podstar Runner RSS feed reads, "Strong Bad describes how to deal with awkward social situations."

Remarks

A cryptic message

• Homestar seems to be surprised at the prospect of having teeth, even though they were clearly visible in theme song.
• Although Strong Bad appeared to dislike long emails in long pants, this email contains 59 words—3 words longer than that email—and is one line longer.
• Although Strong Mad is revealed to have underwear in strong badathlon, it seems to be absent when he takes off his singlet to reveal the message to Coach Z.
• In the Easter egg, the left post of the "Stink's Reach" sign is in the middle of the road.
• The scientist on the "You Reek-A!" t-shirt has eyes that are similar to Strong Sad's right eye.
• Some of the dots on Strong Sad's connect-the-dots puzzle are separated by the crocodile's mouth and hands. Strong Sad doesn't connect the dots that are separated, and simply skips over them.
• In the Toons menu, the clip that appears on the TV when rolling the mouse over "Underlings" in New Stuff shows Homestar accepting a hot dog from Strong Bad without cilantro hanging from his "teeth".
• The static on the TV in the Easter egg seems to show that the channel was changed, but Strong Bad was sleeping.
• Coach Z is shown with his tiny bathing suit, but in keep cool, he is seen wearing a barrel.
• Dartmouth is actually supposed to be pronounced "DART-muth".

Goofs

• Strong Bad spells "trofesssionalism" with three S's.

Fixed Glitches

• When the email was first released, at the end, the "I" at the beginning of "I gotta get started..." was clickable, but did not do anything. This was fixed a few hours after the email was released.

Inside References

• Strong Bad read Da NewsPapes while in the bathroom in candy product.
• Strong Bad is holding a Quite Fancy 'Chup bottle (the label is obscured by his glove).
• Strong Bad refers to the emailer as "PranceyDirtGirl".
• This is another instance of Strong Bad's couch mumbling.
• The smunderling's fact sheet in general is very similar to Jhonka's from impression.
• This is another appearance of oven mitts.
• The Smunderling's intelligence quotient is Low to Middlin', which are ways that the Longrels, Hongrels, and Mongrels are attacked in Thy Dungeonman 2.
• "Smunderling" and "chumpion" are both portmanteaus.
• Strong Bad saying "expoit" is another example of "Er" pronounced as "Oi".

Real-World References

• NOVA is a PBS television series about science topics which premiered in 1974 and is still running to this day.
• The Lost Vikings is a side-scrolling puzzle/platform video game developed and released by Silicon & Synapse (now Blizzard Entertainment) in 1992.
• The information about the smunderling's frequency, intelligence and armor class refers to the way that Advanced Dungeons & Dragons monsters are described, like that previously used for the Jhonka.
• The "Awkward Social Sun" CD and particularly the hairstyle on its cover are a reference to emo culture.
• The "Stink's Reach" promo is a parody of the ABC drama series Twin Peaks.
• Coke is a nickname of Coca-Cola, a soft drink. It is also a term used in many regions to refer to soft drinks in general.

Fast Forward

• The "You Reek-A!" T-shirt was later made available for purchase in the Store.

DVD Version

• The DVD version features hidden creators' commentary. To access it, switch the DVD player's audio language selection while watching.

Commentary Transcript

(Commentary by: Matt Chapman, Mike Chapman)

MATT: {in an airy, mock-serious voice} Welcome to another edition of extremely insightful commentary... {Mike snickers} with Mike and Matt.

MIKE: {also in an overdone commentary-style voice} So, I think I probably animated—see how Strong Bad's head moves back and forth at this part?

MATT: Yes, yes I do.

MIKE: And see how the text is animated as he types?

MATT: Yes!

MIKE: I—I usually animate that part.

MATT: {unintelligible sound of agreement}

MIKE: Can you see the...craftsmanship?

MATT: Yeah. {his airy voice fades away} Why don't you let me do it more often, so I can get something done?

MIKE: {normal voice} Well, I usually do that while you're recording the rest.

MATT: I know.

MIKE: You record these lines first...and then I do the head waggling, as we call it.

MATT: And then I end up doin' thirty seconds of the email and you do four-and-a-half minutes of it.

MIKE: Yeah, but my four-and-a-half minutes is...you know, about four key frames, and yours is...you know, you animate some...lavish scenes. {both laugh}

MATT: Uhhh...so what is this one about?

MIKE: Uhh...

MATT: Underlings.

MIKE: Underlings.

MATT: Smunderlings?

MIKE: Talking to your...

MATT: He's tryin' to tell somebody they suck?

MIKE: Yeah.

MATT: Someth—tell 'em they stink?

{the beginning of the "You Reek-A!" shirt comes up}

MIKE: We made that shirt.

MATT: Yeah, we did.

MIKE: Gubby wears it.

MATT: {slight laugh} Does she? Nice!

MIKE: {laughing, overlapping} I've seen Gubby wear it pretty recently.

MATT: Ohh. I don't think I have one.

MIKE: I don't have one.

MATT: I always think of that—that that scientist looks like Stephen Colbert. {Mike laughs aloud}

MIKE: {pause until Strong Bad looks up from Da NewsPapes; Mike chuckles} Wasn't there another time where Strong Bad—{laughs}

MATT: {underneath} Yeah, he goes "I'm talkin' to you"—

MIKE: —talks to the viewer...on the toilet?

MATT: Well, he's talkin' to Baby Ruth.

MIKE: Oh, he's tal—oh, "I'm talkin' to you, Baby Ruth."

MATT: That was the...standard piece-of-crap shape {Mike laughs} candy bar. {pause until cut away from Strong Sad's connect-the-dots} That's a good-lookin'...alligator, Mike. It was a pretty gross...message, man.

MIKE: What was it, I was...

MATT: {overlapping} It was potty humor.

MIKE: I couldn't figure—I couldn't figure it out. {laughs}

MATT: It was literally potty humor. Whoa, look at the...{laughing} sensual way Strong Mad stripped down into his...{Mike laughs} half-skivvies.

MIKE: {cut to Coach Z; laughing} Speaking of sensual...

MATT: {breaking up in laughter} Yeah. That was the most disgusting...{Mike laughs} wow, this is a pretty vile email! Lotta gross things.

MIKE: {overlapping} Yeah, that little—why were those little spikies on that—

MATT: {underneath, sounding slightly creeped out} I don't know, Mike.

MIKE: —thong that Coach Z was wearing?

MATT: {simultaneously} I think it was like, really—it was supposed to be it was like, ratty.

MIKE: Oh, okay.

MATT: {overlapping} It was, like, really old and crappy. {Strong Bad serves Homestar a hot dog} Look at that—ooh! I wanna—let's—I wanna grill out! That's a good-lookin' set o' hot dogs on that...{Mike laughs} grill.

MIKE: That hamburger was lookin' a little grey, though.

MATT: Yeah, that hamburger looked under...overcooked, rather. Piece of cilantro? Is that what it said?

MIKE: I th—

MATT: Did it specifically say that?

MIKE: I think so.

MATT: {quietly, underneath} Yeah, that's good.

MIKE: I think it was cilantro. Could've maybe been...

MATT: {overlapping} Um...

MIKE: —parsley?

MATT: No, I think it maybe said...{trails off} cilan...

MIKE: {overlapping} No, I know, I'm just sayin' it...could've been.

MATT: Oh, right.

MIKE: {overlapping} Visually! {Matt laughs}

MATT: Um... {Strong Bad is typing his five-paragraph essay} Oh, look, he turns into a fifth-grade {Mike laughs} student council... uh... running... mate.

MIKE: Speech.

MATT: Maker. {both laughing} Mrs. Hardmaster?! Is that really the teacher he just said?

MIKE: {mumbling} I think he—

MATT: We gotta start payin' attention!

MIKE: I know, this is—

MATT: We're tryin' so hard to be insightful I don't remember— this is, a, um... period of emails where I maybe have watched these once.

MIKE: I— I don't think I've watched this since the... {The Paper comes down, he trails off} the day we put it up.

Fun Facts

• Matt refers to Stephen Colbert (silent 't'), best known from his Comedy Central show The Colbert Report (both silent "t"s).

External Links

• watch "underlings"
• watch "underlings" on the old Flash site
• view the Flash file for "underlings"
• forum thread re: "underlings"