the movies
From Homestar Runner Wiki
| Strong Bad Email #167 |
|
Cast (in order of appearance): Strong Bad, The Cheat, Senor Cardgage, Pom Pom, Coach Z, Strong Sad, The King of Town, The Knight, The Hornblower, The Blacksmith, Homestar Runner
Places: Computer Room, The Movie Theater
Computer: Lappy 486
Date: February 20, 2007
Running Time: 3:51
Page Title: Lappy 486
Contents |
Transcript
STRONG BAD: {singing} Coach Z is not that cool, here comes an email.
subject: movieDear Strong Bad,
I was at the movies last night and this little girl behind me
wouldn't shut up! has that ever happened to you?
Cooper
Franklin TN.
{Strong Bad reads the name an address as "A person called Cooper, from the city Franklin, in the state of Tennessee."}
STRONG BAD: Told you I could do it.
THE CHEAT: {offscreen} {grudging The Cheat noises}
STRONG BAD: {typing} Oh, I feel ya, Coopreme. It's a good thing they make you turn off your bazookas before movies man, or every one of my theater-going experiences would end in smoldering crater fashion.
{Cut to a cinema entrance lobby. Posters for Dangeresque 3 and King Bubsgonzola Supreme hang in the background. Senor Cardgage is an usher, Strong Bad, The Cheat and Pom Pom walk in.}
STRONG BAD: {voiceover} The experience starts out promising enough...
SENOR CARDGAGE: Good evening, Bontilda. {takes Strong Bad's ticket and tears it} Forty-twone will be on your lest.
STRONG BAD: Just you watch, The Cheat. Some day I'm gonna be the one tearing tickets and telling folks that forty-twone will be on their lest.
{Cut inside the cinema. Coach Z is watching the movie screen, fidgeting and thinking hard.}
STRONG BAD: {voiceover} It begins with the genius who can't resist answering the oh-so-challenging film trivia slides they show before the movie.
COACH Z: Oh, I know this one! The Brat Pack! Pan-and-scan! Spencer Tracy!
STRONG BAD: Real impressive, Ebert. We've only seen this slide ten times since we all sat down.
ANNOUNCER: {voiceover} If you answered "B", you're ready for film school.
COACH Z: Ohh, it was ice cold refreshment. I should've known.
{Cut to the screen, which reads:}
MOVIE & REFRESHMENT TRIVIA*
The correct answer was :
B: Ice Cold Refreshment*ACTUALLY JUST REFRESHMENT TRIVIA
{Another slide is shown on the screen, with a picture of a bazooka, labelled "Please Be Considerate. Because no one wants to watch a smoldering crater."}
ANNOUNCER: Be considerate of others. Please turn off your bazookas before the progrum.
STRONG BAD: {voiceover} Then, once the movie starts, don't forget the guy who insists on rattling off the complete filmographies of each of the actors.
{Cut back to the audience, and pan over to Strong Sad.}
MOVIE: {voiceover} —but when I returned, the DNA evidence was gone!
STRONG SAD: Ooh, and he had a cameo as Stevodore #2 in the prequel, and he was in that car commercial with the wisecracking transmission, and he has a Bacon number of 4!
STRONG BAD: {gets up and turns back to face Strong Sad} And this is my fist! {raises said fist} You might remember it from Bloodied Pulp, the amazingly true story of your face in five seconds. {sits back down}
STRONG SAD: He was in Dangeresque 1 and 2.
{Cut to The Cheat, who is sitting next to Strong Bad and eating popcorn.}
STRONG BAD: {voiceover} And if you think the guy sitting next to you munching popcorn is bad, try going to a theatre where people regularly sneak in their own all-you-can-eat fajitas!
{Cut to the King of Town, who is holding a frying pan covered in sizzling food, with a stack of similar pans in the seat beside him.}
THE KING OF TOWN: Hey! This was all in my box of Milk Duds.
{Pan back, behind the King of Town, there are the the Knight (with a guitar), the Hornblower (with a horn) and the Blacksmith (with maracas). The three of them play a brief Latin melody. Cut back to Strong Bad.}
STRONG BAD: {voiceover} And that brings me to the little girl behind me, who wouldn't shut up.
{Pan behind Strong Bad, Homestar Runner is standing there, wearing a viking helmet.}
HOMESTAR RUNNER: {singing} {?}
STRONG BAD: {voiceover} This is the kind of person that likes to talk to the movie. But not in the usual "Don't go in there!" or "Oh no he di'n't!" type of way. He just makes small talk with the characters, and chit-chat.
{Cut through white to some time in the movie. Homestar is sitting on his seat, with the viking helmet on the seat next to him.}
MOVIE: {voiceover} Well I figured out their plan.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Yeah, I figured I'd just cut up some iceberg lettuce, throw some tomatoes on there, maybe a little catalina. Nothing fancy, nothing fancy.
{Cut through white to later in the movie. Homestar is lying on his seat, with his head resting on the helmet.}
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Oh man, have you ever been to a ground-breaking? I mean, what is the point of those things?
{Cut through white again, Homestar is lying upside down on his seat, with his legs in the air.}
HOMESTAR RUNNER: You know where the real money is? Phone books.
{Cut through white yet again, Homestar is sitting up normally.}
HOMESTAR RUNNER: I wonder how you spell "tabasco". Tabasco...
STRONG BAD: What is wrong with you people? Do you not notice the giant movie over here? Were all the local sit-around-and-suck-out-loud places closed?
{Strong Bad picks up a bazooka, holds it beside his head like a cell phone, and imitates a ringtone.}
STRONG BAD: Oh, di-a-lo-do, da-a-lo-do, di-a-lo-do, die!
{Strong Bad lowers the bazooka to point at the camera and fires it. Fade back to the computer room.}
STRONG BAD: {typing} So, that's why I'm not allowed at the movies anymore. But I don't care. I brought my movie viewing into the digital age. And I dig-it-all!!! Check it out!
{Strong Bad runs "karatecar.exe". An ASCII art movie starts. A stick figure man walks along a street, with buildings in the background, and a car drives across. The stick figure jumps and does a somersault over the car just before he gets hit.}
STRONG BAD: {sotto voce} Oh, look out mister slashey-man!
{The movie cuts to a closeup of the car.}
STRONG BAD: {sotto voce} Ooh, something exciting!
{The movie cuts to a closeup of the stick figure man, who says "Now THAT was a sports car!". He then does some karate moves and says "Hi-YA!".}
STRONG BAD: {sotto voce} Aah, I guess I'm talking during the movie! Kind of a hypocrite! Gonna shut up now!
{The Paper comes down.}
Easter Eggs
- Click on the "@" at the end to see a film trivia screen.
- Click on the "Hi-YA" at the end to see Homestar in a smoldering crater:
- HOMESTAR RUNNER: Oh man. This movie has it all. Cinema has never lisped so Wilson.
Fun Facts
Explanations
- Pan and Scan refers to a technique by which film originally shot in widescreen format is transferred into a format compatible with the shape of common TV screens.
- Catalina is a type of salad dressing made from tomato ketchup and sugar.
- ASCII art is an artistic medium that relies primarily on the use of characters to for pictures.
Inside References
- "Coopreme" is a portmanteau of "Cooper" and "supreme".
- The voice(s) heard during the Trivia screens and the movie sound very much like the voice in the SBASAF Orientation video.
- This is the third email in a row that mentions DNA Evidence (heard during the movie).
- This email features another intentional mispronunciation of the word "program" as progrum.
- Two of the movie posters are for King Bubsgonzola Supreme (based on unnatural) and Dangeresque 3: The Criminal Projective (with no predetermined release date). Strong Bad originally said that Dangeresque 3 would come out in June 2004, hence the first crossed out date.
Real-World References
- The song Strong Bad hums before shooting the bazooka is the classic Nokia ringtone, made famous by Nokia commercials and cell phones everywhere, and in reference to a cell phone going off during a movie.
- The Brat Pack refers to a group of actors that rose to fame in the 1980s by starring in several teen-oriented movies.
- Spencer Tracy was a two-time Academy Award-winning film actor.
- Strong Bad's "Ebert" comment refers to Roger Ebert, a Chicago-based movie critic.
- "Bacon number" refers to the number of degrees of separation an actor has from actor Kevin Bacon. This, in turn, stems from the Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon game that was popular in the early 1990s.
- The pans, wooden trays, and tortilla containers that accompany The King of Town's fajitas are the same style as those served at the popular restaurant chain Chili's.
- Milk Duds are a popular candy often sold at movie theaters.
- Luke Wilson is an American film actor.
External Links
- watch "the movies"
- watch "the movies" on the old Flash site
- view the Flash file for "the movies"
- forum thread re: "the movies"
