Editing retirement

{{sbenav|159}}
[[Image:Top Of Bubs' Concession Stand.png|thumb|"Let's not do anything inappropriate with that magnet..."]]
The Lappy-nappers are revealed! Can Strong Bad save his beloved fold-em-up computer?

'''Cast (in order of appearance):''' {{Film|Strong Bad}}, {{Film|Marshie}}, {{Film|The Sad Kids}}, [[Lappy 486#Female Lappy 486|Female Lappy 486]], [[Tandy 400]], [[Compy 386]], [[The Paper]], {{Film|Homestar Runner}}, {{Film|The King of Town}}, {{film|Marzipan}}, {{film|The Cheat}}, {{film|Strong Sad}}, {{film|Strong Mad}} 

'''Places:''' [[Basement of the Brothers Strong]], [[Bubs' Concession Stand]], [[Computer Room]], [[Carnival Tent]], [[The Field]]

'''Computers:''' [[Tandy 400]], [[Compy 386]], [[Lappy 486]] [[Category:Tandy 400 Emails]] [[Category:Compy 386 Emails]] [[Category:Lappy 486 Emails]]

'''Dates:'''
:''Part A released (as "retirement"; changed to "retirement A" the next day):'' Monday, October 2, 2006
:''Part B released (as "retirement B"):'' Tuesday, October 3, 2006
:''Parts A and B combined released (as "retirement (combined)"):'' Monday, October 9, 2006
:''Name changed to just "retirement":'' Sunday, October 22, 2006

'''Running Time:''' 6:53

'''Page Title:''' Lappy 486

{{dvd|strongbad_email.exe Disc Five}}

==Transcript==
''{Open in Strong Bad's computer room, coming in on  a worried Strong Bad, while suspenseful music plays.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' My computer's been lappynapped!

''{A record scratches and the screen dims, Marshie comes in from the bottom of the screen.}''

'''MARSHIE:''' Hello, Kenneth!

''{Marshie flies across a yellow background.}''

'''MARSHIE:''' Hear me roar!

''{Marshie growls for a moment, then opens his mouth wide, the background turns red, sound lines come out of his mouth, and he meows. Cut to a shot of the Sad Kids standing on top of Marshie.}''

'''MARSHIE:''' That's right, kids!

''{Silhouettes of the main characters scroll across the page, with big question marks over them. As he names the sweepstakes, the name appears on the screen.}''

'''MARSHIE:''' Play the Fluffy Puff Marshmallows ''My Lappy Got Stole!'' Sweepstakes and win big!

''{As Marshie says "big", he grows a large, fat, white body, and his voice deepens. Cut to a shot of a bicycle. Marshie's voice is back to normal.}''

'''MARSHIE:''' First prize,&mdash;

''{A shot of a metal detector}''

'''MARSHIE:''' &mdash;second tries,&mdash;

''{Marshie, in a car, driving along with mountains in the background}''

'''MARSHIE:''' ''{singing}'' Take a trip to the mountains... ''{these words appear above the mountains, written on a musical staff}''

''{The screen dims and Marshie comes down from the top with a top hat and a cane.}''

'''MARSHIE:''' I'm a song and dance man!

''{Cut to a wooden desk, with a note card on it.}''

'''MARSHIE:''' Just email who you think done it on a 3x5 note card,&mdash;

''{"it was the HIPPO!" is written on the note card.}''

'''MARSHIE:''' &mdash;stick a Fluffy Puff on each corner,&mdash;

''{Four marshmallows appear, one stuck on each corner of the card. Cut to Marshie, talking through gritted teeth, in front of a portrait of an older marshmallow-like woman.}''

'''MARSHIE:''' ''{in an irritated and mysterious voice}'' &mdash;AND JUST WALK AWAY, ''MOTHER.''
''{Cut to the ad on the TV in Strong Bad's basement. Marshie is next to a bag of Fluffy Puff Marshmallows.}''

'''MARSHIE:''' Fluffy Puff Marshmallows. Yeah! Still!

''{The words "Yeah! Still!" appear underneath Marshie. Cut to Strong Bad lying on the couch, surrounded by empty chip packets of various descriptions.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' You gotta be kidding me. Man, everybody's trying to make a buck or nine off my heart-drooping loss. <!--Strong Bad does NOT say 'Buck o' nine' so don't change it!-->

''{He feels around in the nearest bag of chips, and finds that it's empty.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Oh, perfect. Now I'm out of my antidepressant. Nothing dulls the pain quite like several dozen half-full bags of ''{as he lists the flavorings, symbols for them appear at the top of the screen}'' Italian-herb-chipotle-buffalo-ranch-guacamole-Thai-peanut-style chippety-chomps. I guess I'll slink off to Bubs' and refill my prescription. Slinnnk...

''{Strong Bad somehow slides up and over the armrest of the couch, and off screen. Cut to Strong Bad at Bubs' Concession Stand. Bubs is nowhere to be seen.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Bubs! Hello? Can I get a witness? Bubs? ''{looks around the stand, and screams}''

''{Pan to the side of the stand, we see the Lappy's power cord hanging off the roof. Tense music plays.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' The Lappy's tail! I'll save you, Lappy-pie... poo... ''{runs back and forth anxiously, making the Homsar walking noise}'' Just keep your pixels on. Strong Bad's got everything under control-alt-delete.

''{Strong Bad picks up a ladder from behind the stand, and climbs up onto the roof.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Who put you up here&mdash; Wha?!?

''{The suspenseful music plays, and reveal the Lappy, with the broken Tandy and the shotgunned Compy. The Tandy is suspending a horseshoe magnet from a fishing rod above the Lappy's keyboard.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' It's my crappier and crappiest computers!

''{Both old computers fizz and spark.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Careful, guys, let's not do anything inappropriate with that magnet... I've got a lot of important text files on that 5 meg hard drive... Now just let the Lappy go, and we can all go out for hushpuppies. You guys still like hushpuppies, don't you?

''{Both old computers fizz and spark a lot.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Okay, fine. hushpuppies are out. For some reason I... I thought you guys liked hushpuppies.

''{Both old computers keep fizzing and sparking. The Tandy also churns its floppy disk drive.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Sorry, guys, we're getting nowhere. I don't speak extravagantly broken computer.

''{The Paper comes down, reading "'Sup Strong Bad. I'll help with the translation."}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' The Paper! You're just in time! Find out what they want!

''{The Paper goes back up, and the Compy "talks" for a bit. The Paper comes back down with "They want to come out of retirement..."}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Retirement? They didn't retire, I threw them away. Ask them if they mean they want to come out of ''thrown-awayment''.

''{The Paper comes down again, reading "They're not laughing. They each want to check one last email."}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Are they joking? Those guys couldn't check an email with the help of sixty horses dressed up as IT professionals!

''{The Tandy lowers the magnet a little, and the Lappy's screen turns on, showing:}''

<blockquote style="background: #06bfad; padding: 30px; width: 25em; margin: 0; border: none">
{| style="margin-left:auto; margin-right:auto"
|<div style="border: 1px solid black"><p style="border-top: 2px solid white; border-left: 2px solid white; border-bottom: 2px solid #999; border-right: 2px solid #999; background: #CCC; color: black; font-size: 150%; text-align: center; line-height: 125%; margin: 0; padding: 0"><big>Oh, Child!</big><br>It's the Teal Screen<br>&nbsp;of Near Death! (TSoND)&nbsp;</p></div>
|}
</blockquote>

'''STRONG BAD:''' Okay, okay, okay! I'll do my best. If it'll save the orphanage... I mean, my Lappy, I'll do it. Now, let's check emails like it was the deuce double-aught dweice!

''{Both old computers "talk".}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' It just means 2002... I... thought it was slick... slick-rick... way to talk...

''{Fade through black to Strong Bad with the Tandy at the email-checking desk. You hear the old typing effect. The Tandy sparks its screen throughout.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{singing}'' Green lines, green, green lines. It's a Strong Bad Email again.

<blockquote class="tandy email">
dearest strong bad<br>
do you remember the email that you deleted<br>
the hardest<br>
sincerly<br>
josh<br>
oakland
</blockquote>

''{Strong Bad reads "sincerly" as written, and "josh oakland" as "josho kland". He also adds an extra pause between "dearest" and "strong".}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Well, let's just see here... Zero capitalization...

''{The first letters of each of "dearest", "strong", "bad", "do", "sincerly", "josh" and "oakland" are all briefly highlighted}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Misspelling...

''{The word "sincerly" is briefly highlighted}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Lack of punctuation...

''{The blank spaces after "bad", "hardest", "sincerly" and "josh" are all briefly highlighted}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{with a hint of insincerity}'' Looks like a winner to me! ''{typing}'' Dearest Josho, I have some good news for you! I <u>DO</u> remember the email that I deleted the hardest. And I'm still remembering it right now!!! ''{stops typing}'' Homestar! Little help, please.

''{Zooms out to reveal Homestar pouring a bottle of Mountain Dew into the hole in the side of the Tandy}''

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' I'm way ahead of ya, SB.

'''STRONG BAD:''' Then, we'll just add some of the King of Town's fizzy denture tablets.

''{Strong Bad holds up a box of [[Oh No You Dent! Denture Tablets]].}''

'''THE KING OF TOWN:''' ''{offscreen}'' Thems is my after-dinner mints!

''{Strong Bad tips several of the tablets into the hole.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{heavy reverb}'' And now if you'd please turn in your hymnals, and join me in singing number 119, a-deleted.

''{Strong Bad hits the keyboard, and the "DELETED!!" screen comes up, with a gothic font. Organ music plays.}''

'''STRONG BAD & HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' ''{singing}'' Deleted!

''{Strong Bad swings a pickaxe through the keyboard and the desk. The Tandy explodes, and gives off a bad graphics mushroom cloud.}''

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' ''{turns away, falls to his knees and closes his eyes}'' Aaah!

'''STRONG BAD:''' Goodbye, old girl. They'll always say you went out in a blaze of green rectangular glory.

''{Homestar, with one eye still closed, starts pouring Mountain Dew on the carpet. Cut to a closeup of Strong Bad.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' All right! One down, one to go.

''{Cut to a shot of the shotgunned Compy on the desk. The suspenseful music plays. The screen fades to black.''}

''{Strong Bad is in front of the Compy. Despite the hole, he manages to type "strongbad email.exe".}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{singing}'' There's a big ol' hole inside my email, makin' it hard to cheeeeck...

''{He brings up the email. It is formatted around the hole.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Oooh! Automatic hole formatting! ''{starts reading}''

<blockquote class="compy email">
Dear Strong Bad,<br />
I want to see you perform some amazing<br />
feats of<br />
wonder.<br />
<br/>
Very ser- &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; iously,<br />
Luke S.
</blockquote>

''{Strong Bad says "Double Dear Strong Bad" in place of the first line, and after reading "wonder", he comments "You mean, more amazing than checking an email on this computer?!" In place of the name, he says "Luke South".}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{typing}'' Well, I am very serious too. Serious about the most incredible, tantalizing, pants-defying, mind-googling sights in the whole world!! ''{stops typing}'' Lalalalalalaaaa!

''{Cut back to show the whole computer room. A [[Wikipedia:Boater (hat)|boater hat]] falls on his head and a cane into his hand.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Ladies and Luke, I give you...

''{The Computer Room rises, as if it were a theater curtain, revealing a carnival tent.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{as a sideshow caller}'' Strong Bad's Amazing Feats of Wonder! ''{Strong Bad appears in the foreground}'' Gawk and squawk as I walk and talk like an old-timey sideshow caller, and add "Lalalalalaa" to the end of everything I say lalalalalalaaa!

''{Strong Bad ducks down. Cut to inside the tent.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' First, in our gallery of ocular oddities, is a contortionist... with a twist!

''{He moves away, revealing a curtain painted with "MARZiPAN - SHE-TYPE! KA-RAZY?"}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Feast your Dust Bowl-ravaged eyes on ''{Curtain lifts, revealing Marzipan with her hair tied up.}'' Marzipan, the Human Woo-man ''{rolls the next "R"}'' Rrrrrotini!

''{A logo for "The Human Woo-man Rotini" appears. Marzipan curls her neck like a spring. The audience makes amazed sounds.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Behold! An ocean of pesto!

''{Green liquid flies in from offscreen and lands on Marzipan.}''

'''MARZIPAN:''' That's not part of my act!

''{Cut to The King of Town, with some of the green liquid dribbling down from his mustache.}''

'''THE KING OF TOWN:''' I know! It's a part of ''mine'' lalalalalalalaaa!

''{He sucks in the liquid. Cut back to Strong Bad.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Now, direct your attention to the Pee Wee Stage...

''{Again, Strong Bad moves aside. Now the curtain shows "THE CHEAT - AND HOW! PART ANVIL?"}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ...where the flea circus has left town, and the inmates are restless!

''{The audience ooohs as the curtain is lifted, showing a manacled The Cheat.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Gather strong at The Cheat's Flea Prison Riot!

''{As the above words appear, a magnifying glass focuses on The Cheat and zooms in on a tiny prison in his fur, where a number of small black dots are rioting and squabbling. The prison has some flames coming out of the windows, and a siren is heard. Cut back to Strong Bad in front of a curtain reading "Strong Sad - DEE PRESS! DO U DARE?" with an elephant styled to look like Strong Sad.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''(perfunctorily)'' And don't forget Strong Sad's feet of wonder.

''{The audience ahhhs as the curtain is moved up, revealing Strong Sad in a blue dress with a beard. A paper reading "stupid's stupid crap that I hate" appears for a moment. Strong Sad lifts the dress, revealing his feet, as the audience gasps.}''

'''STRONG SAD:''' I call them "soolnds".

''{Cut to Strong Bad.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' And lastly, so ghastly, the ate-thh wonder of the world!

''{Cut to curtain showing "Strong Mad - ATE THH! NECK?"}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' House-mouth!!!

''{The curtain lifts, showing Strong Mad in a loincloth. A "HOUSE-MOUTH" logo appears. The audience gasps.}''

'''STRONG MAD:''' DAAAAH!! ''{Opens his mouth very wide, taking up most of his body and creating the shape of a house. The audience gasps.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{popping in from the side of the screen}'' This land-locked leviathan conveniently subsists only on outdated electronics!

''{He ducks away as the Compy is thrown in Strong Mad's mouth. He closes his mouth. A second later, he jumps a bit as a sparking sound is heard. Strong Mad gulps it down.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{popping in again, and throwing his hat and cane}'' ''We did it!!!'' Lalalalalalalaaaa!

''{The scene again rises like a curtain, revealing the Computer Room. The Lappy is in its place at the desk.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' The Lappy! You're back...y! You and I have some unfinished business, little lady!

''{Strong Bad sits down. Cut to the Lappy's screen.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{typing; anywhere that a comma would be appropriate, a dull tapping sound is heard}'' There ya go Jake-ula. Now all the cliffhangers have been for reallysolved. Okay Lappy I hope your battery's charged ''{music starts}'' cuz I'm finally taking you out for those hush-puppies you always wanted!!!

''{He picks up the Lappy and walks off. Fade to black. Cut to a silhouette of Strong Bad holding the Lappy and walking across the sunset. Ghostly images of the Tandy and Compy appear over his head. The music suddenly stops with a record scratch.}''

'''FEMALE LAPPY 486:''' But Strong Bad, I'm hate hushpuppies!

'''STRONG BAD:''' Man, I coulda sworn one of you guys liked hushpuppies.

''{The Paper comes down, reading "It was me. I like hushpuppies." The music starts again. It eventually stops again with a record scratch.}''

'''FEMALE LAPPY 486:''' Can we please find my toe?

''{Strong Bad stops walking and looks up toward the ghostly images, which speed away upwards.}''

==Easter Eggs==
* Click on Strong Bad's diamond when he says he's got a lot of important text files on Lappy's harddrive to see a selection of those files.
<table>
<tr valign="top"><td>
<blockquote style="font-family: monospace">
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;clncknmsfrmyslf.txt<br><br>
Cool nicknames for myself<br>
&#45;-------------------------<br><br>
Mr. Lewd Comment 1965<br>
Giantus<br>
The Fake Frenchman<br>
<del style="color:red"><span style="color:black">Light 'n Fluffy</span></del> <span style="color: red; font-family:sans-serif">NO!</span><br>
[[Heaven]] in Tights<br>
Good Fortunator<br>
Bicep Lad<br>
Lebner<br>
Mighty Legit<br>
Dabney Coleman's Evil Twin<br>
Wisewallace<br>
/got nothin'<br>
The Detroit Locksmith<br>
Prudeacre
</blockquote>
</td><td>
<blockquote style="font-family: monospace">
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;cldshplog.txt<br><br>
&nbsp;Cloud Shape Spotting Log<br>
&#45;------------------------<br><br>
lightswitch w/no cover<br>
baseball headed baby<br>
brown water<br>
michigan w/2 bites out of it<br>
smallish elbow<br>
box of crackers (unopened)<br>
pestilence<br>
2 salamanders giving low-5's<br>
oversized novelty comb<br>
cheap date<br>
strong sad's ghost<br>
uppity maitre d<br>
strong sad's corpse<br>
diet pills
</blockquote>
</td></tr><tr><td>
<blockquote style="font-family: monospace">
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;ltr2bkrythrftstr.txt<br><br>
Letter to Bakery Thrift Store<br>
&#45;------------------------<br><br>
Dear Bakery Thrift Store,<br>
Whom do you think you are<br>
fooling? You sell old baked<br>
goods. The stuff regular<br>
bakeries throw away. So what<br>
if a loaf of bread is only<br>
29 cents? It's old bread.<br>
Should I start collecting<br>
roadkill squirrels, glue<br>
cotton balls to their butts<br>
and open an 'Aftermarket<br>
Rabbit Thrift Store?' Oh,<br>
wait. Yes I should. Thank You<br>
Bakery Thrift Store. Love, SB
</blockquote>
</td><td valign="bottom">[[Image:Dullard sbemail159a.png|thumb|Horses in IT?]]</td></tr>
</table>

* Click on the roof vent after the Teal Screen of Near Death appears to see a [[Dullard]] comic.
:'''PANEL ONE:'''
::''{Dullard is at his computer, with the boss behind him}''
::'''BOSSYFACE:''' I WANT YOU TO MEET OUR NEW I.T. PROFESSIONAL.<br>
:'''PANEL TWO:'''
::'''BOSSYFACE:''' ''{pointing to a horse-headed person behind him}'' THIS IS RANDY. TREAT HIM NICE NOW.
:'''PANEL THREE:'''
::'''DULLARD:''' I'M A THOUSAND PERCENT SURE THAT'S A HORSE.
:'''PANEL FOUR:'''
::''{Randy pulls out a handful of hay}''
:'''PANEL FIVE:'''
::''{Randy chews the hay}''
:'''PANEL SIX:'''
::'''BOSSYFACE:''' ''{turns back to Dullard}'' YOU MAY BE ON TO SOMETHING.
* Click the electrical socket after the Tandy's explosion to replay the explosion animation.
* Click on the Compy's contrast dial when Strong Bad checks the second email to see some sparks fly.
*When Strong Bad says "Luke South", click on the Compy's exposed gear to see a southward traffic sign.
*At the end, before the old computers fly away, click their contrast knobs for the [[Bad Graphics Ghost]] and a dancing skeleton on the Tandy and Compy, respectively.
*After the spectral computers fly away, click on the Lappy to see an extra scene involving the King of Town.
:''{A curtain is seen with a [[ham]] with the King of Town's head on it reading "The King of Town - ONE DER! MEAT MAN?"}''
:'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' He's half-man, half-cholesterol! Can I get a "ooh-ahh" for Clogdor!
:''{The curtain lifts, revealing the King behind a counter with a frying pan on it. The [[Grabbo Arm]] is holding up a toothpick above the frying pan. "CLOGDOR!!" is written across the top of the screen.}''
:'''AUDIENCE MEMBERS:''' Ewww! Euugh!
:''{The King of Town burps, producing an oddly-colored bubble. As it floats toward the frying pan, the Grabbo Arm juts forward, popping the bubble and creating the innards of an [[egg]], which falls into the frying pan. The audience gasps.}''
:'''THE KING OF TOWN:''' If ya think my burps are impressive, wait'll you see my&mdash;
:'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{Cutting in in front of the scene}'' &mdash;seen enough of that one lalalalalalalaaaaa!

==Fun Facts==
===Changes Between the Two-Part and One-Part Versions===
This email was originally released as a two-parter, and was re-released a week later as a single email called "retirement (combined)". (On October 22, the email was renamed "retirement".) The following were added or changed from the original:
* The Lappy's comma key is now missing throughout the toon. Originally, the key was present in part A when the Compy and Tandy are holding the Lappy hostage but was missing in part B when Strong Bad gets it back.
* The Tandy's screen now intermittently flashes with static while Strong Bad is checking its email.
* Part A ended with the zoom-in on the Compy 386 (as the suspenseful music played). The Paper came down with a message that read, "To Be Continued Tomorrow!". Part B picked up with Strong Bad sitting at the Compy. When the two parts were combined, The Paper was removed, and a transition in and out of black now splices the two halves.
* Also removed were the "back" link at the end of part A and the "loading" screen at the beginning of part B. This is notable because even though the "back" link was on the Compy, it was written in the Lappy's font, and the "loading" screen on part B was written in the Compy's font.
* Clicking on the Compy's contrast dial creates some sparking effects.
* A gear in the Compy now turns as Strong Bad types.
* An extra scene featuring Strong Sad in Strong Bad's carnival tent was added.
* When Strong Bad attempts to type commas in his closing remarks, commas no longer appear and instead a dull tapping sound is heard.
* An Easter egg featuring the King of Town's act in Strong Bad's carnival tent was added.

===Explanations===
[[Image:Tandy400explode.PNG|thumb|"DELETED!"]]
*The explosion following the addition of Mountain Dew and denture tablets to the Tandy 400 is due to the rapid release of carbon dioxide gas from both the carbonated water and the effervescent action of the sodium bicarbonate and citric acid in the tablets, not to be confused with the [[Wikipedia:Mentos eruption|Diet Coke and Mentos]] phenomenon.
*[[Wikipedia:Control-Alt-Delete|Control-Alt-Delete]] is a computer keyboard command on [[Wikipedia:IBM PC compatible|IBM PC compatible]] systems that can be used to close programs or reboot the computer.
*A [[Wikipedia:Hushpuppy|hushpuppy]] is a deep-fried ball of cornmeal commonly eaten in the southern United States, usually with fried fish.
*Putting a magnet too close to a computer can damage the data stored on [[Wikipedia:Magnetic storage|magnetic storage]], such as [[Wikipedia:Hard disk|hard disks]].
*Structures or people are called the [[Wikipedia:Eighth Wonder of the World|Eighth Wonder of the World]] in order to liken their perceived greatness to the [[Wikipedia:Seven Wonders of the World|Seven Wonders of the Ancient World]].
*[[Wikipedia:Leviathan|Leviathan]] is the name of a [http://www.answersingenesis.org/creation/v19/i4/seamonsters.asp sea-monster] mentioned several times in the [[Wikipedia:Old Testament|Old Testament]]. The word "leviathan" is often used to refer to any large monster or creature.
*[[Wikipedia:Pesto|Pesto]] is an Italian sauce frequently served over pasta. While many variations exist, in its classic form it is made of basil, parsley, pignoli [peen-yole-ee] (pine nuts), extra virgin olive oil, and pecorino-romano cheese, and requires no cooking.
* Strong Sad is dressed as a [[Wikipedia:Bearded Lady|Bearded Lady]].

===Trivia===
*This is another instance of [[Strong Bad checking more than one email]].
*At 6:53, this is the second longest toon on the site. It beats the previous longest email, [[alternate universe]], by nearly one minute, and the third longest toon, [[In Search of the Yello Dello New Version]], by 8 seconds.The longest toon is [[Hooked on Decemberween]] at 6:58.
*The [[Hanging Objects|portrait]] of Marshie's mother is hung in the same frame as the painting by the Deutsch Master in [[portrait]].
*For the first email, the floppy disk container reads "[[Floppy Disk Container#mastertype|mastertype]]". For the second, it reads "[[Floppy Disk Container#silpheed|silpheed]]".
*This is the first Strong Bad Email to feature each of Strong Bad's first three computers.
*This is the first time [[soolnds]] are mentioned out loud to refer to Strong Sad's [[elephant]]-like feet.

===Remarks===
[[Image:extra outlet and Lappy plug.png|thumb|120px|The Lappy's tail!]]
*When Strong Bad says that his "antidepressant" has run out, some of the bags lying around the couch are partially filled.
*In Marshie's Whodunnit? scene, every main character is visible silhouetted except for [[The Cheat]], [[The Poopsmith]], [[Homsar]], and [[Strong Bad]] himself.
*Strong Bad says that the Lappy's hard drive holds five "[[Wikipedia:Megabyte|megs]]". However, in [[animal]], the Lappy has a "2 MB Hard Drive!".
*During Strong Bad's confrontation with the Tandy and Compy, there are clickable areas on the Lappy's screen, but clicking on them has no effect. This is because the Tandy's contrast buttons are behind the Lappy, and they are disabled in this scene.
*The word "contrast" on Strong Bad's Tandy is in a different font than it was before the Tandy was thrown out. This change was also made for the redone Tandy-era e-mails in [[do over]].
*If you view the Flash file, during the [[Mountain Dew|Mountain Dew]] scene there is an extra electrical outlet outside the black, complete with the Lappy's cord plugged in. It is also there when Strong Bad says "All right, one down, one to go!"
**The cord is also seen on the Flash file of the second part right before the feats of wonder tent appears. 
*The three sounds that play on the Tandy when Strong Bad highlights portions of the email come from [[Wikipedia:MacOS|MacOS]]: "Purr", "Sosumi", and "Temple", respectively.
*This is the first time an email has been [[deleted]] in the Lappy era (even though it was not deleted on the Lappy itself).
*The Tandy and Compy were sold by Bubs to the King of Town ([[King of Town Email]]) and Homestar ([[Broken Compy Menu]]), respectively. Oddly, both denied kidnapping the Lappy in [[cliffhangers]] (Homestar) and [[Lappynapped!]] (King of Town).
<!-- Please do not note anything about the existence of the Lappy sbemail menu. If it goes anywhere, it goes on the Strong Bad Email page. -->
[[Image:End 159.PNG|thumb|Slightly less shotgunned]]
*The hole in the Compy is smaller here than it was at the end of [[virus]], making it possible to fit a token amount of legible text onto the screen.
*In the start of the second part, the Compy applies "automatic hole formatting" to the email, but when Strong Bad starts typing his reply, some of the written text does not appear on the Compy's screen.
*Strong Mad appears to have no tongue or tonsils.
*Apparently, the cog inside the Compy processes text, yet it was shown spinning while broken at the end of [[virus]].
*The sounds of the fleas on The Cheat sound a lot like The King of Town and Strong Bad's voices sped up when they are saying "Lalalalalala".
*The Paper doesn't have a link to Strong Bad's email address.
*[[The Virus|The viruses]] in the Compy, which affected the outside world in [[virus]], do not return for this email. It seems the shotgun was effective in removing the viruses.
*The email checked with the Tandy uses the animation style that was used in emails prior to [[brianrietta]], where Strong Bad's mouth moves as opposed to his head.
**The sound effect of the keyboard is also the same as that used in those emails.
*Despite the green monochrome features of the Tandy, Strong Bad highlights the spelling and grammatical mistakes in Josh's email in yellow.
*Neither the plug socket or the Compy's cord appear during the Compy email.
*The Lappy's wall adapter is beige here, but it is black in [[isp]].
*Despite having only a 5 minute (advertised in [[animal]] as half of ten minutes) battery life and weighing 42 pounds, Strong Bad is able to take it for hushpuppies, which would take much longer.
*The Compy displays text, even though the shotgunned hole reveals no [[Wikipedia:Electron_gun|electron gun]], which would be necessary for a [[Wikipedia:Cathode_ray_tube|CRT]] monitor.
*During the Compy email, the part of wall inside the hole is somewhat brighter than the part outside the Compy area. This might be due to the fact that there is a terrible fade in the paint when a computer is not visible, as evidenced in [[animal]].
*Based on the behavior, it appears that the comma key itself is missing (as opposed to simply the key cap missing).

===Goofs===
*When the camera zooms in on the box of the King of Town's fizzy denture tablets, the green lines on the Tandy aren't moving.
*Right after Strong Bad deletes the Tandy email, and is about to swing the pickaxe into the keyboard, for a split second, you can hear Homestar saying "deleted", but his mouth doesn't appear to move.
*There is no electrical outlet under the table while Strong Bad is using the Compy.
*While zoomed in on the Compy, Strong Bad's reflection appears over some of the cracks in the Compy's screen.
*For about two frames, around when Strong Bad swings the pickaxe into the keyboard, the green on the Tandy's screen is out of position.
*While the Tandy and Compy are holding the magnet over the Lappy, the Tandy's green lines aren't visible.

===Inside References===
*This email follows directly from [[cliffhangers]], where Strong Bad's computer was kidnapped at the end of the email. The dramatic "cliffhanger resolution" music is reused from that email as well. Strong Bad's closing remarks are directed toward Jake, who sent the email featured in cliffhangers.
**Marshie saying "who you think done it" is a reference to an Easter egg in cliffhangers, in which Homestar says "You know who I think done it?"
*This is another appearance of [[index cards]] on the site.
*The phrase "Slink off to Bubs'" is a reference to the spamvertisement Easter egg at the end of [[unused emails]], which stated, "Slink on over to Bubs' Concession Stand..."
*"Now, let's check emails like it was the deuce double-aught dweice!" most likely refers to the fact that in 2002 Strong Bad last checked an email with the Tandy and first checked an email with the Compy.
*"Number 119, a-deleted" may be a reference to Email #119 ([[animal]]) in which Strong Bad first got the Lappy. It could also mean the number of emails that have passed since the Tandy's previous role in checking an email in Email #40 ([[vacation]]).
*Two of the items on Strong Bad's Cloud Shape Spotting Log ("strong sad's ghost" and "strong sad's corpse") refer to [[Death#Strong Sad|Strong Sad's imagined death]].
*Homestar pouring [[Mountain Dew]] into the Tandy is a reference to [[anything]], in which he poured Mountain Dew onto the Compy.
*Strong Bad makes Homsar's walking noise and skitters around like him when he notices the Lappy's cord and is frantically pacing around.
*The Cheat was previously compared with an anvil in [[huttah!]].
*The skeleton image on the Compy's computer is from [[Peasant's Quest]].
*Marzipan's curtain contains another case of [[Lowercase i's]].
*The picture on Strong Mad's curtain resembles the [[Strong Man]]. Interestingly, although the figure in the picture is wearing the Strong Man's outfit, Strong Mad's costume consists of only a loincloth.
*The word "[[soolnds]]", the name that Strong Sad has given his feet, was previously used in [[Strong Sad's Lament]].
*The King of Town's stage name "Clogdor" is a play on "[[Trogdor]]" and is written in the same [[font]] as Trogdor's name on the official T-shirts.
*Strong Sad dressed as the Bearded Lady is another instance of [[cross-dressing]].
*Strong Mad [[Eating Non-Food Items|eats]] the Compy 386.
*The King of Town appears to have [[puking|puked]] during the act with Marzipan.

===Real-World References===
*The way Strong Bad says "buck or nine", it sounds similar to the ska punk band [[Wikipedia:Buck-O-Nine|Buck-O-Nine]].
*When Strong Bad is on the couch, there is a brand of chips called "Flavored Triangles". This could be a reference to [[Wikipedia:Doritos|Doritos]] or other tortilla corn chips which are triangle-shaped.
*The winged buffalo references the [[Wikipedia:Buffalo Wild Wings|Buffalo Wild Wings]] mascot.
*The [[Wikipedia:Teal (color)|Teal]] Screen of Near Death is a reference to the various colored [[Wikipedia:Category:Screens of death|Screens of death]] used by computer operating systems to indicate serious system errors. The [[Compy 386]] has been seen to have its own [[Wikipedia:Blue Screen of Death|Blue Screen of Death]] (the [[Strong Bad's Computer Malfunctioning|Flagrant System Error]]) on more than one occasion.
*[[Wikipedia:Dabney Coleman|Dabney Coleman]] is an actor most known for his role in the films ''[[Wikipedia:Nine to Five|Nine to Five]]'' and ''[[Wikipedia:Tootsie|Tootsie]]''.
*[[Wikipedia:Slick Rick|Slick Rick]] was a popular hip-hop artist of the late 1980s and early 1990s.
*"/got nothin'" in the text files is a reference to [[Wikipedia:Fark.com|Fark.com]], where people often end their posts with that remark.
*Homestar pouring Mountain Dew onto the carpet after the destruction of the Tandy may be a reference to the practice of pouring [[Wikipedia:libation|libations]] on the ground to honor the dead.  In Strong Bad's case, it can also be used to honor those [[video games|sent up the river]].
*"If it'll save the orphanage..." is most likely a reference to ''[[Wikipedia:The Blues Brothers|The Blues Brothers]]'', in which the brothers put their old band back together in order to save the orphanage in which they were raised.
*Strong Bad's contracted naming of files refers to names often given to files due to [[Wikipedia:8.3|8.3]] naming restrictions present in older [[Wikipedia:File Allocation Table|FAT]] filesystems, although his file names would be too long for these rules.
*"Just walk away, mother" is a reference to the movie ''[[Wikipedia: Psycho (1960 film)|Psycho]]''. Also, the painting seen when Marshie delivers this line is drawn similarly to the caricature of [[Alfred Hitchcock]] seen at the start of his television program, ''[[Wikipedia:Alfred Hitchcock Presents|Alfred Hitchcock Presents]]''.
*The [[Wikipedia:Dust Bowl|Dust Bowl]] was a series of dust storms caused by poor farming techniques that ravaged the central United States and Canada from 1934 to 1939.  Hundreds of thousands of people were displaced.
*The graphics for the Fluffy Puff Marshmallows My Lappy Got Stole! Sweepstakes resemble those used for the 1995 [[The Simpsons|Simpsons]] episode [[Wikipedia:Who Shot Mr. Burns?|Who Shot Mr. Burns?]] contest sponsored by 1-800-COLLECT. That contest also featured silhouettes of the main characters with big question marks over each one, while a voiceover told viewers where to send in their guesses of the guilty party's identity in order to win the grand prize (being animated into an upcoming episode).
*The "horses in IT" joke could be a reference to the British comedy series [[Wikipedia:Little Britain|Little Britain]], which contained a sketch set in a computer shop featuring a [[Wikipedia:horse whisperer|horse whisperer]] asking a horse how to fix a problem with installing Windows XP.
<!-- Please do not add "Can I get a witness?" as a song reference, there are many songs with that line and title. -->
<!-- LOTS of things are called the "eighth wonder of the world." This is already noted in Explanations. -->

===Fast Forward===
*Strong Bad would pronounce Ls in a similar way in [[hygiene]].
*There would be a second two-part toon in the [[Cheat Commandos]] episodes; [[2 Part Episode: Part 1]] and [[2 Part Episode: Part 2]].
*The destruction of the two computers is featured and Strong Sad says "Oh, child!" in [[hremail3184]].
*The Mountain Dew pouring bit would later be reused in [[email thunder]].

== DVD Version ==
{{commentary|email=true}}
=== Commentary Transcript ===
('''Commentary by:''' [[Mike Chapman]], [[Strong Bad]], [[Ryan Sterritt]], Powered By The Cheat Strong Bad)

'''MIKE:''' All right.

'''STRONG BAD:''' Strap yourselves in, boys.

'''MIKE:''' This is a really long email, so we're gonna have to do it in shifts, all right?

'''STRONG BAD:''' Okay. I'll, I'll take sh...

'''MIKE:''' You take the first shift. Go, Strong Bad.

'''STRONG BAD:''' First!? Okay. Uhh, man. That's disgusting! ''{Ryan and Mike laugh}'' That's the nastiest thing I've ever seen. Although I would love to win one of those metal detectors. I always wanted to win one of those, from the video game shows.

'''RYAN:''' That was every kid's dream.

'''STRONG BAD:''' Yeah. A metal detector would make you rich. ''{pause}'' You think Marshie's got some issues...

'''MIKE:''' With his mom?

'''STRONG BAD:''' Yeah. Like, every time we see him, we&mdash; we see he has more issues than before. ''{pause}'' Uh... this was... this was great, you guys. I felt... uh, you know, it was a good way to wallow in your own sorrows.

'''MIKE:''' Did you really eat all this?

'''STRONG BAD:''' Yeah, empties. Dead soldiers, I call 'em. ''{Ryan and Mike laugh}'' ''{pause}'' So, I had to mix up my own batch to get all those flavors in one&mdash; in one chip.

'''MIKE:''' I've always thought they should have a mixed bag of, uh, chips. Doritos.

'''STRONG BAD:''' Yeah, a trail mix! A suicide!

'''MIKE:''' Exactly. A kamikaze.

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{simultaneously}'' A chips suicide! Yeah. ''{pause}'' Um, so this, yeah, I was freaked out, you guys.

'''MIKE:''' I can tell by your dance right there.

'''STRONG BAD:''' Yeah, look at that. I don't do that very often. I'm usually pretty poised, I, like... uh, I got a swagger about me. ''{pause}'' So can magnets still really do damage to computers, and hard drives, guys?

'''MIKE:''' I hope not.

'''STRONG BAD:''' If I take a 5¼-inch disc and put a magnet on it, is it gonna erase the data? Like all of 'em, remember, they had those pictures that told you not to do it.  There'd be, like, a sad disk that's like, "No! Don't do it, magnet!" And the magnet would be erasing all your files.

'''MIKE:''' So was this awkward, Strong Bad? Is it like hanging out with ex-girlfriend... your current girlfriend and your ex-girlfriend at the same time?

'''STRONG BAD:''' Absolutely. It was... it was weird.

'''MIKE:''' Like you were afraid one of the other computers was gonna ''say'' something?

'''RYAN:''' They'd all become friends.

'''MIKE:''' ''{laughing}'' Yeah.

'''STRONG BAD:''' Yeah. It was a good thing The Paper showed up 'cause it was gonna get&mdash; it was about to get weird, you know? Where it'd be like, "Oh, you remember that time Lappy, we went to a movie?" and then the Compy'd be like, "No that was ME. WE went to that movie." And I&mdash; "Oh, crap, I totally..." you know...

'''MIKE:''' Best just keep your mouth shut in that situation.

'''STRONG BAD:''' Yeah, yeah.

'''MIKE:''' Don't risk it.

''{In the email, the Tandy lowers the magnet}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' OH, CHILD! ''{Mike laughs}'' Um, so th&mdash; this was even worse. ''{stutters}'' You guys have no idea what it's like to work&mdash; have to work with broken computers. Especially one that has a big hole through it. ''{slight pause}'' Yeah, those guys don't know anything about my slang. I have a good slang.

'''MIKE:''' So is it, uh...

'''STRONG BAD:''' Whose shift is it now, guys? C'mon...

'''MIKE:''' Ryan, step up! Ryan, step up!

'''RYAN:''' All right. It's good seeing this can still, uh&mdash; this computer still works.

'''MIKE:''' Surprising.

'''STRONG BAD:''' I thought it was in the garbage.

'''MIKE:''' That was the last time we saw it, I think.

'''STRONG BAD:''' The King of Town tried to use it one time.

'''MIKE:''' Seems like the only thing that's really happened is that the, uh, text kinda flickers a little bit every once in a while now.

'''RYAN:''' Which isn't so bad.

'''STRONG BAD:''' It's better than Mike's computer was for a long time! ''{Mike and Ryan laugh}''

'''MIKE:''' I used to have to stuff paper in the ram drive... the ram slot.

'''STRONG BAD:''' Oh, they totally sold out, these guys. To Mountain Dew.

'''MIKE:''' To Oh No You Dent! ''{laughs}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Oh NO You Dent! ''{slight pause}'' Now I turned on my auto reverb on my voice. I can project like the old Romans. ''{In the email, Strong Bad swings the pickaxe into the keyboard and the computer explodes.}'' Where did I put that pickaxe? I need that thing. That thing's awesome.

'''MIKE:''' You didn't even hit the deleted key with it.

'''STRONG BAD:''' Uh, you don't know where it is. You have to hold a couple of buttons down...

'''MIKE:''' Oh, it doesn't just have a&mdash;

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{simultaneously}'' ...to make "Deleted" happen.

'''MIKE:''' Oh, okay.

'''STRONG BAD:''' Gee, Mike.

'''MIKE:''' Control alt... two?

'''STRONG BAD:''' Maybe. Control alt wherever I hit with the pickaxe. So this is the second half, right? These were released two days in a row!

'''MIKE:''' That's right.

'''RYAN:''' I like that the words... finish on the other side.

'''MIKE:''' Auto hole formatting.

'''STRONG BAD:''' Yeah. There's a lot of auto formatting that goes on in my universe.

'''MIKE:''' These computers are pretty smart for giant... giant gaping holes. ''{Ryan laughs}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' That's true. ''{pause}'' I am a no-joke. I am very serious. Right? ''{In the email, the curtain opens to reveal the Amazing Feats of Wonder}'' So this, uh, this operation was pretty good. We made a lot of money...

'''MIKE:''' Oh, the Amazing Feats of Wonder?

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{simultaneously}'' ...and two friends.

'''MIKE:''' Who'd you make friends with?

'''STRONG BAD:''' Um, Roman?

'''MIKE:''' ''{laughing}'' Roman?

'''STRONG BAD:''' There's a guy named Roman.

'''MIKE:''' Okay.

'''STRONG BAD:''' And Rink.

'''MIKE:''' Roman and Rink.

'''RYAN:''' Rink?

'''MIKE:''' Were they friends with each other?

'''STRONG BAD:''' Rink was a ferret. ''{Mike and Ryan laugh}'' It was Roman's ferret. ''{In the email, Marzipan twists her head}'' OHH! That, I, oh, that's disgusting. And that's even more disgusting.

'''MIKE:''' What happened there?

'''STRONG BAD:''' You&mdash; You don't wanna see the King of Town's act. ''{Mike laughs}'' He does some questionable things. It's like that sideshow that went on tour with the Lollapaloozas.

'''MIKE:''' Jim Rose?

'''RYAN:''' Jim Rose?

'''STRONG BAD:''' Jim Rome's sideshow&mdash;

'''MIKE:''' ''{laughing}'' Jim Rome.

'''STRONG BAD:''' &mdash;sports talk sideshow. Look at that. Who needs a flea ''circus''? ''{slight pause}'' That's disgusting. This makes me question a lot of things, looking at that guy. And this is pretty disturbing, too, those leopard panties he's wearing.

'''MIKE:''' Yeah, I don't like Strong Mad without his, uh, singlet on.

'''STRONG BAD:''' Yeah. ''{pause}'' That's pretty amazing, he can do that with his mouth though. That's pretty cool. ''{In the email, the curtain opens up to reveal the Lappy}'' Say, whose shift? Mike's shift.

'''MIKE:''' ''{simultaneously}'' All right, my shift, my shift. All right. I'm gonna take it down, I'm the, doing the&mdash; what to they call the last leg?

'''STRONG BAD:''' The shift is on.

'''MIKE:''' The anchor. I'm the anchor. All right. Uh, so I hope your battery's charged, cuz I'm finally taking you out for those...

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{simultaneously}'' Don't just read it!

'''MIKE:''' ''{rapidly}'' I can't think of anything else to say, I'm just going on adrenaline here.

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{unintelligible}''

'''MIKE:''' Look at that background. I started doing these kinda different backgrounds a few months ago, Strong Bad&mdash;

'''STRONG BAD:''' They're beautiful.

'''MIKE:''' &mdash;for the silhouette scenes, instead of just the usual yellow.

'''STRONG BAD:''' They boot-iful.

'''POWERED BY THE CHEAT STRONG BAD:''' They boot-iful. I'm gonna do my Strong Bad impression now, Strong Bad. What do you think of that?

'''STRONG BAD:''' Great, Mike.

'''POWERED BY THE CHEAT STRONG BAD:''' Now, listen to me, you little man. Wrestleman.

'''STRONG BAD:''' That sounded great, Mike.

'''POWERED BY THE CHEAT STRONG BAD:''' Thanks, man.

'''STRONG BAD:''' You're doing really good.

'''POWERED BY THE CHEAT STRONG BAD:''' I know.

'''STRONG BAD:''' Why don't you take over.

'''POWERED BY THE CHEAT STRONG BAD:''' I'll do it.

'''STRONG BAD:''' From now on.

'''POWERED BY THE CHEAT STRONG BAD:''' I can do it.

''{In the email, the Lappy says, "...find my toe?"}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Mitosis.

===Fun Facts===
*The King of Town used the Tandy 400 in the April Fool's special [[King of Town Email]].
*"I am-a very serious. I am no joke" is a reference to [[Wikipedia:Roberto Benigni|Roberto Benigni's]] character in the [[Wikipedia:Jim Jarmusch|Jim Jarmusch]] film [[Wikipedia:Down By Law (film)|Down By Law]].
*Strong Bad would later mention winning metal detectors in game shows in [[buried]].
*[[Wikipedia:Jim Rome|Jim Rome]] is a nationally-syndicated sports radio talk show host, noted for his "smack"-talking style.  Listener emails play a large part in Rome's show, and he disposes of emails he doesn't like by audibly balling up the printouts and throwing them out, an analog type of "deletion".
*Strong Bad's mention of the Romans projecting their voice is a reference to Roman amphitheaters, which would be constructed specifically to have a certain place that would greatly amplify sound for the other listeners.

==External Links==
{{sbemailextlinks|159|9999}}
*[[Mirror:sbemail159a.html|watch "retirement A"]] (mirror)
*[[Mirror:sbemail159a.swf|view the Flash file for "retirement A"]] (mirror)
*[[Mirror:sbemail159b.html|watch "retirement B"]] (mirror)
*[[Mirror:sbemail159b.swf|view the Flash file for "retirement B"]] (mirror)

{{Strong Bad Email}}
[[Category:Emails With DVD Commentary]]