property of ones

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== Screenshot ==
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:{{about|[[Strong Bad Email]]}} {{for|theorem|Bogus Mathematical Theorems}}
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{{sbenav|39}}
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[[Image:sbemail39.PNG]]
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[[Image:sbemail39.PNG|thumb|A needlepoint moral]]
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== Summary ==
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Strong Bad talks about [[Cold One]]s, with a few tweaks at standard algebra.
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'''Strong Bad Email #39'''
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'''Cast (in order of appearance):''' {{Film|Strong Bad}}
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Strong Bad talks about cold ones.
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'''Places:''' [[Computer Room]]
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'''Features: [[Strong Bad]]'''
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'''Computer:''' [[Tandy 400]]
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'''Date:''' Monday, August 5, 2002
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'''Running Time:''' 1:19
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'''Page Title:''' Tandy 400: Still Bloke.
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{{dvd|strongbad_email.exe Disc One}}
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__FORCETOC__
== Transcript ==
== Transcript ==
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'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{singing}'' Gimme some of this and gimme some of thiiiiis... gimme some of this. ''{stops singing}''  
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'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{singing}'' Gimme some of this and gimme some of thiiiiis... Gimme some of this. ''{stops singing}''  
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<pre>Hey Strong Bad,
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<blockquote class="tandy email">Hey Strong Bad,<br />
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<br />
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How's it hanging? Last weekend I almost drank a one  
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How's it hanging? Last weekend I almost drank a one <br />
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that was not cold. Has this ever happened to you?
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that was not cold. Has this ever happened to you?<br />
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<br />
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Dan Waters
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Dan Waters<br />
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Dallas, TX</pre>
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Dallas, TX</blockquote>
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''{Strong Bad pronounces TX as "Tehas"}''
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''{Strong Bad pronounces TX as "Tejas"}''
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'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{typing}'' Aw, Dan, you dodged a bullet, man. Because lemme tell you...a One that is not cold, is scarcely a One at all. Allow me to demonstrate with one of my bogus mathematical theorems. I call it "The Property of Ones". It goes like this: The ONE<sup>itude</sup> is directly proportional to the COLD<sup>itude</sup> of the ONE. So you got that, Dan? The colder it is, the more of a one it is. Because you don't want to end up with a Cold None. I wouldn't wish that on anybody. But now in foreign lands, they've been known to drink ''{The bottle of "Not So Cold One" appears.}'' Not So Cold Ones, ''{Then, a bottle of "Room Temp-A-Ture One" appears.}'' Room Temperature Ones and even, ''{And finally, a bottle of "Wrm ne" appears.}'' Warm Ones. Whoah! But where I come from, it's CUH-HOLD ONES. Though I have to admit, on certain evenings in late spring, a Cool One can be very refreshing. ''{stops typing}'' Ooh... that's a good one.  
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'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{typing}'' Aw, Dan, you dodged a bullet, man. Because lemme tell you... a One that is not cold, is scarcely a One at all. Allow me to demonstrate with one of my bogus mathematical theorems. ''{stops typing}'' I call it ''{resumes typing}'' "The Property of Ones". ''{stops typing}'' It goes like this: ''{resumes typing}'' The ONE<sup>itude</sup> is directly proportional to the Cold<sup>itude</sup> of the ONE. So you got that, Dan? The colder it is, the more of a one it is. Because you don't want to end up with a Cold None. I wouldn't wish that on anybody. But now in foreign lands, they've been known to drink ''{stops typing}'' Not So Cold Ones ''{a bottle of "Not So Cold One" appears}'', Room Temperature Ones ''{a bottle of "Room Temp-A-Ture One" appears}'', and even Warm Ones ''{a bottle of "Wärm Öne" appears}''. Whoa! ''{clears screen, resumes typing}'' But where I come from, it's ''CUH-HOLD ONES''. Though I have to admit, on certain evenings in late spring, a Cool One can be very refreshing. ''{stops typing}'' Ooh... That's a good One.
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'{A picture of three "Cold One" bottles with the text below saying "A One That Isn't Cold, Is Scarcely A One At All" appears on the screen. [[The Paper]] comes down.}''
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''{A needlepoint picture of three "Cold One" bottles with the caption "A One That Isn't Cold, Is Scarcely A One At All" appears on the screen. [[The Paper]] comes down.}''
== Fun Facts ==
== Fun Facts ==
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===Trivia===
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*This is the last email that has no Easter Eggs until email #133, "[[bottom 10]]".
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*The bottle of Not So Cold One states that they are served at "90 degrees or higher".  This would make them far warmer than Room Temp-a-ture Ones, room temperature being somewhere in the low to mid 70s, but cooler than Warm Ones, which come "straight from the oven".
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*The [[YouTube]] description for this email is: "Strong Bad makes up some bogus mathematic equations about cold ones."
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===Remarks===
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*The needlepoint saying is improperly punctuated; it shouldn't have a comma between "cold" and "is".
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*The back button has been written in needlepoint, but it is on the frame of the picture.
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*Ironically, beer loses its flavor at colder temperatures.
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*When Strong Bad types "the less of a one it is", he doesn't capitalize the word "one".
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===Inside References===
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*Strong Bad refers to the Property of Ones as "one of [his] [[bogus mathematical theorems]]" — the first was the Transitive Butt Property in [[butt IQ]].
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*In the introduction of this email, Strong Bad may be singing to the Falco tune of "Rock me Amadeus".
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===Real-World References===
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*The page title, "Still bloke", may be a reference to the Japanese language pronouncing "l" and "r" the same. When switched, it's "broke", which actually fits contextually.
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**It is possible that this is a double reference, since the "foreign land" where they drink Wärm Önes would be assumed to be England or the British Isles, where a "bloke" is a casual reference to a male, generally equivalent to the vernacular "guy".
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*The screen they show at the end showed a needlepointed picture on a corkboard. A strange animation was later created on that same corkboard out of "knitting- animation" by the Brothers Chaps. It can only be accessed by going to [http://www.homestarrunner.com/needlepoint.html]. Go there, and you'll understand me better. Trust me. It's there.
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===Fast Forward===
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*[[The Brothers Chaps]] later created a [[needlepoint]] animation using the same corkboard and wall background seen at the end of this toon.
== External Links ==
== External Links ==
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*[http://www.homestarrunner.com/sbemail39.html watch "property of ones"]
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{{sbemailextlinks|39|youtube=pqFNLidNxis}}
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*[http://www.homestarrunner.com/sbemail39.swf view the flash file for "property of ones"]
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{{Strong Bad Email}}
{{Strong Bad Email}}
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[[Category:Strong Bad Email]]
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[[Category:Tandy 400 Emails]]

Current revision as of 10:21, 5 December 2018

This article is about the Strong Bad Email. For the theorem, see Bogus Mathematical Theorems.
Strong Bad Email #39
watch helium vacation
A needlepoint moral

Strong Bad talks about Cold Ones, with a few tweaks at standard algebra.

Cast (in order of appearance): Strong Bad

Places: Computer Room

Computer: Tandy 400

Date: Monday, August 5, 2002

Running Time: 1:19

Page Title: Tandy 400: Still Bloke.

DVD: strongbad_email.exe Disc One

Contents

[edit] Transcript

STRONG BAD: {singing} Gimme some of this and gimme some of thiiiiis... Gimme some of this. {stops singing}

{Strong Bad pronounces TX as "Tejas"}

STRONG BAD: {typing} Aw, Dan, you dodged a bullet, man. Because lemme tell you... a One that is not cold, is scarcely a One at all. Allow me to demonstrate with one of my bogus mathematical theorems. {stops typing} I call it {resumes typing} "The Property of Ones". {stops typing} It goes like this: {resumes typing} The ONEitude is directly proportional to the Colditude of the ONE. So you got that, Dan? The colder it is, the more of a one it is. Because you don't want to end up with a Cold None. I wouldn't wish that on anybody. But now in foreign lands, they've been known to drink {stops typing} Not So Cold Ones {a bottle of "Not So Cold One" appears}, Room Temperature Ones {a bottle of "Room Temp-A-Ture One" appears}, and even Warm Ones {a bottle of "Wärm Öne" appears}. Whoa! {clears screen, resumes typing} But where I come from, it's CUH-HOLD ONES. Though I have to admit, on certain evenings in late spring, a Cool One can be very refreshing. {stops typing} Ooh... That's a good One.

{A needlepoint picture of three "Cold One" bottles with the caption "A One That Isn't Cold, Is Scarcely A One At All" appears on the screen. The Paper comes down.}

[edit] Fun Facts

[edit] Trivia

  • This is the last email that has no Easter Eggs until email #133, "bottom 10".
  • The bottle of Not So Cold One states that they are served at "90 degrees or higher". This would make them far warmer than Room Temp-a-ture Ones, room temperature being somewhere in the low to mid 70s, but cooler than Warm Ones, which come "straight from the oven".
  • The YouTube description for this email is: "Strong Bad makes up some bogus mathematic equations about cold ones."

[edit] Remarks

  • The needlepoint saying is improperly punctuated; it shouldn't have a comma between "cold" and "is".
  • The back button has been written in needlepoint, but it is on the frame of the picture.
  • Ironically, beer loses its flavor at colder temperatures.
  • When Strong Bad types "the less of a one it is", he doesn't capitalize the word "one".

[edit] Inside References

[edit] Real-World References

  • The page title, "Still bloke", may be a reference to the Japanese language pronouncing "l" and "r" the same. When switched, it's "broke", which actually fits contextually.
    • It is possible that this is a double reference, since the "foreign land" where they drink Wärm Önes would be assumed to be England or the British Isles, where a "bloke" is a casual reference to a male, generally equivalent to the vernacular "guy".

[edit] Fast Forward

[edit] External Links

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