keep cool

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Strong Bad Email #154
watch redesign some kinda robot
Strong Bad explains how he keeps cool in the summer.
"Pool Time!"

Cast (in order of appearance): Strong Bad, Bubs, Strong Mad, Homestar Runner, Strong Sad, Marzipan, Coach Z, Pom Pom, The Poopsmith, The Cheat, The King of Town

Places: Computer Room, Strong Badia, Bubs Concession Stand, The Stick, The Brick Wall, Marzipan's House, Swimming Pool

Computer: Lappy 486

Date: July 31, 2006

Running Time: 3:33

Page Title: Lappy 486

Contents

Transcript

STRONG BAD: {rapping} I'll take you back to a time when e-mail was king! {brings up the email}

{After "Strongbadia", a record scratches, the screen dims and another Strong Bad appears.}

SECOND STRONG BAD: Note to viewers:

{Screen cuts to Strongbadia. A cutout in the shape of Strong Bad labeled "SB" is shown.}

STRONG BAD: {voiceover} This is Strongbadia.

{Screen cuts to Bubs' Concession Stand, with a similar cutout for Bubs labeled "bubs".}

STRONG BAD: {voiceover} Not this...

{Screen cuts to Strong Bad's basement, with a cutout of Strong Mad labeled "graw mad".}

STRONG BAD: {voiceover} ... this...

{Screen cuts to The Stick, with a cutout of Homestar labeled "ds".}

STRONG BAD: {voiceover} ... or this.

{Cut back to Strongbadia.}

STRONG BAD: {voiceover} Just this.

{Cut back to the still-dimmed Lappy.}

SECOND STRONG BAD: We clear? Now gimme five.

{The second Strong Bad holds up his left hand, and then disappears as the rest of the screen returns to normal and the original Strong Bad finishes reading the email. He reads "CA" as "Cactus Area."}

STRONG BAD: {typing} I'm not exactly sure how hot it is round here, Tomby. But we do have an old-timey, made-uppy, no-worky way of finding out.

{Cut to Strong Sad, sleeping on a brick wall. A book labeled "Mr. Chekhov" is next to him.}

STRONG BAD: {voiceover} We carefully place a spoonful...

{Strong Bad and Strong Mad rise from behind Strong Sad, and Strong Bad places a spoon of sauce on Strong Sad's head.}

STRONG BAD: {voiceover} ... of hoisin sauce on Strong Sad's disturbing soft-serve flip. And then we just... ask him.

STRONG BAD: Hey!

{Strong Bad hits Strong Sad, who wakes up.}

STRONG BAD: Trundle bed, how hot it is right now?

STRONG SAD: Current temperature: ninety-seven, ninety-eight degrees. Humidity: twenty-five percent. {Strong Bad and Strong Mad slowly start to leave, making a tapping noise as they do.} Barometric pressure: thirty point oh five inches mercury. I'm gonna eat this spoonful of hoisin sauce.

{Strong Sad grabs the spoon from off his head and eats the sauce. Cut to the edge of the wall, where Strong Bad and Strong Mad are standing.}

STRONG BAD: You hear that?! The high nineties!

{Strong Bad pulls out a paper titled "Monkey D's Summer Tips". The screen cuts to a closeup of the paper.}

Monkey D's
Summer Tips

95°-100°=COOL TIME, POOL TIME!!!
90°-95°=Grip n' Glide time,
                              Slide n' Slide time
80°-95°=Tinkler time, Sprinkler time
95°-100°=Nose time, Hose time

STRONG BAD: You know what that means!

{Cut to Strong Bad and Strong Mad. Music starts.}

STRONG BAD AND STRONG MAD: COOL TIME, POOL TIME!!!

STRONG BAD: It's the pool that we've always had... that we use all the time... and the school has always had an elevator!

{Cut to Marzipan's couch. Marzipan is sitting on it. Homestar Runner pops up in the foreground.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Cool time!

MARZIPAN: Pool time!

{Cut to Bubs' Concession Stand, where Coach Z is leaning on the counter.}

COACH Z: Cool time?

BUBS: Pool time!

{Cut to the Field, where Pom Pom and The Poopsmith are standing.}

POM POM: {bubbles}

{The Poopsmith gives him the thumbs-up. Cut to the Pool. Strong Bad is sitting in the lifeguard's chair. Coach Z walks past in the background with a barrel over him. Bubs floats with inflatable toys on his arms. The Cheat skims across the surface of the water quickly twice. Cut to a closeup on Strong Bad.}

STRONG BAD: All right, ya little sacks of crap, just so I never have to use this weird foamy thing, {He kicks a floatation device hanging from his perch.} lemme 'splain the pool rules.

{A paper reading "POOL RULES" appears. Strong Bad reads along.}

STRONG BAD: Welcome to our 'ool. (Notice there is no "Take a crap in it" in it. Please keep it that way.

{Cut to The Poopsmith, wearing a Nebulon flotation device and testing the water with his foot.}

STRONG BAD: Poopsmith, don't even try it.

{A Nebulon-esque sound is heard as The Poopsmith hangs his head. Cut back to Strong Bad. The Pool Rules sheet returns, and the following rules get added with illustrations as Strong Bad mentions them.}

STRONG BAD: Also, no rough-horsing, no house-rousing, no butt-patting.

COACH Z: {offscreen} Aw, nuts!

STRONG BAD: And no running, no diving, no swimming.

{Cut back to Strong Bad.}

STRONG BAD: But that last one is not very widely enforced. But most importantly, after you eat, wait three full days, get a complete physical, have an ear candling, and press UP, A and START before re-entering the pool.

MARZIPAN: Strong Bad, what did you put in this pool water?

{Strong Bad looks at Marzipan, whose ponytail has a green tinge and the very tip of it is burning away. The burning is slowly making its way up her ponytail, burning it off during the whole scene.}

STRONG BAD: I dunno... chemicals, whatever was under the sink.

{Cut to a pile of chemical containers and a bottle of Awesome Sauce.}

STRONG BAD: You gotta put chemicals in the pool, right? That's what they say. {Pause} And that is all that they say.

MARZIPAN: {suddenly smiling} Well, whatever it is, it's doing wonders for my hair. I can feel it tingling.

{Cut to stormy clouds, faint flashes of lightning, and the sound of thunder. Cut back to Strong Bad.}

STRONG BAD: {in sing-song voice} Lightning. {in a normal voice} You guys know the drill.

{Cut to Bubs, Strong Mad, and The Cheat leaving the pool}

STRONG MAD and THE CHEAT: {groans and The Cheat noises}

BUBS: Man!

{Homestar Runner, Coach Z, and The King of Town walk through the pool carrying a TV antenna, a barrel and golf clubs, and an umbrella, respectively. They stop in the middle of the pool.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER, COACH Z and THE KING OF TOWN: {sighs and groans}

{Cut to Strong Bad talking with Bubs at the lifeguard chair}

STRONG BAD: So later on anybody wanna get together a game of "Sharks and Minnows"? "Einstein and Kreskin"? "Pregnant and seventeen"?

BUBS: {points toward the diving board} Uh-oh! Looks like we should have been playin' "Keep Strong Mad off the freakin' high dive for Pete's sake, man!"

{Strong Mad jumps off of a high-dive}

STRONG MAD: MAD-ONBALL!

{Strong Mad takes the shape of a circle and splashes into the water. There is a short pause. Suddenly, all of the water is splashed out of the pool. Cut back to Strong Bad's computer. Strong Bad crashes in through the ceiling. Water splashes down on him. He looks up}

STRONG BAD: I should really just stop patching that hole. {typing} Well, it looks like pool season's over. Guess I have to start Back2School shopping. Get some new pencilholders... {Homestar can be heard in the background} stencil folders...

{Homestar lands on top of Strong Bad}

HOMESTAR: Uh, Strong Bad, I think that total wave ruined your 'ool.

STRONG BAD: {groaning} Ah... breaky... spiney...

{The Paper comes down.}

Easter Eggs

  • Click on CA when Strong Bad says "Sunnyvale, Cactus Area" to see a menu:
Cactus Area
"The most boring Mexican restaurant on Earth"
(Yes, we know what salsa is now!)
  • Click on the Lappy's screen at the end to see Strong Sad continuing his weather forecast:
STRONG SAD: Wind south-southwest at 10 miles per hour. Sunset at 8:45 PM. {the King of Town slowly comes up behind him} Baseball games at two and, uh, three. {King of Town puts a cherry on Strong Sad's head and pulls out a can of "Lard Wipt"}

Fun Facts

Explanations

  • Strong Bad's explanation that Strong Badia consists only of the vacant lot he claimed as his own is probably for the benefit of emailers and others who mistakenly think that "Strong Badia", rather than Free Country, USA, is the name for the region where he and the rest of the gang live.
  • A Trundle bed is a low bed on wheels that can be rolled under another bed for storage.
  • Ear candling, also known as ear coning, is a folk remedy performed by using the heat from a lit candle to melt accumulated ear wax and debris.
  • Hoisin sauce is a type of Chinese dipping sauce made from soybeans, garlic and spices.

Remarks

  • Surprisingly, at the end, Strong Bad does not complain about his "clavicus majorus", which is where he must have felt the most pain.

Goofs

  • The 'ool rules sign dosen't have a closing parenthesis.

Inside References

  • The "ds" on the Homestar Runner cutout probably stands for "Duckshirt" or "Dumbstar", two nicknames Strong Bad has used for Homestar in the past. However, it seems mostly implied that it is a poor phonetic spelling of the word "this", which Strong Bad says as he presents the examples of what Strong Badia is not.
  • The Poopsmith uses a Nebulon floating tube; when Strong Bad tells him that he can't get in the pool, the Nebulon sound effect ensues.
  • Strong Bad previously fell through the roof in pom pom.
  • Graw Mad is a reference to the facts.
  • The disk in the floppy disk container is the same one found in disconnected.
  • Strong Bad's tan lines were first seen in lures & jigs.
  • The Cheat looks inflated while in the pool, which may be a reference to helium.
  • In the pile of chemicals we can see some "Roach Killa" from bedtime story and some "Awesome Sauce" mentioned in funny (though this is "Awesome Sauce for her").

Real-World References

  • This email was released during an actual heat wave in the United States, Canada and much of Europe.
  • Strong Sad's book reads "Mr. Chekhov", a reference to the Russian writer and physician Anton Chekhov, as well as Pavel Chekov, a character from Star Trek who was regularly referred to as "Mr. Chekov" by other crew members.
  • The second item on "Monkey D's Summer tips" is a reference to the Slip 'N Slide water toy.
  • Strong Bad's advice to "press UP, A and START before reentering the pool" is a reference to the NES games Metroid, The Legend of Zelda, and Zelda II: The Adventure of Link, in which the game's progress can be saved or a game progress password would be brought up by pausing (pressing "START") on the first controller and simultaneously pressing "UP" and "A" on the second controller. It is also a reference to the code from Kirby's Dream Land for the Game Boy in which you enter Up+A+Select on the title screen to play the game in "Extra Mode" where enemy sprites are different and it's harder.
  • Einstein and Kreskin refer to Albert Einstein (world-famous physicist) and The Amazing Kreskin (sort-of-famous mentalist).

External Links

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