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Strong Bad Email #175
watch mini-golf hygiene
"And that one guy even had his back to us all night!"

Strong Bad talks about how sloshy became one of his favorite, and then least favourite band.

Cast (in order of appearance): Strong Bad, Trogdor, Larry Palaroncini, Strong Sad, Homestar Runner, Mary Palaroncini, The Poopsmith (Easter Egg), Senor Cardgage (Easter Egg)

Places: Computer Room, Strong Bad's Laundry Room, The Field, Strong Bad's Basement, Bathroom of the Brothers Strong, Mud Baths, The Space Machine (Easter Egg)

Computer: Lappy 486

Date: August 20, 2007

Running Time: 4:26

Page Title: Lappy 486

Contents

Transcript

STRONG BAD: {to a tune I can't identify, someone help me out here} I'm running through a field of emails! Paranoia! Paranoia!

{Strong Bad's speech begins to stress as he reads the signature, becoming ovbiously distressed by something.}

STRONG BAD: {typing} Wipe that smiley face off your the words 'smiley face.' You do not impersonate The Burninator, got it?

{As Strong Bad says that, a Trogdor sprite walks on the Lappy screen and burns the email signature. The Trogdor Arcade Game theme music plays in the background.}

STRONG BAD: {typing} Yeah, I go to concerts. Why else would I own a pair of Hollywood Boulevards?

{Scene cuts to the laundry room, showing a pan-out of Strong Bad wearing a pink leapord-pattern bandanna and unusual shoes than what he normally wears [if someone can ID the shoes, please edit this part of the transcript.]}'

STRONG SAD: Oh, hello, plea-ted boots. What are you all gusseyed up for?

STRONG BAD: Shut up, man! I always dress like this.

{cuts to close-up of Strong Bad}'

STRONG BAD: I'm going to see Limozeen tonight. But I never heard of the opening band, so I'm gonna show up fashionably late. What are you all gusseyed down for?

STRONG SAD: I'm going to see a show tonight too. But I've never heard of the headliner, so I'm gonna leave fashionably early.

STRONG BAD: Well, those two things don't sound at all related. Bye loser!

{Both Strong Bad and Strong Sad walk off-screen, cut back to Lappy}

STRONG BAD: {typing} Hey, guess what? They were related. Apparently, Limozeen was trying to expand their audience into people that {pauses awkwardly} went to college. So, they got this band sloshy to open up for them. But Limozeen ended up cancelling because...

{a paper labelled 'LIMOZEEN Contract Rider' appears on-screen}

LARRY PALARONCINI: {drums in background} Our audience must be 94% hot young females with bangs higher than or equal to our own. {Drums get more intense} And also a deviled egg tray! {The words "Deviled Egg Tray!" appear hand-written on the contract}

{Paper disappears}

STRONG BAD: {typing} So, Limozeen just hung out in their tour bus and watched ESPN Classic all night, while sloshy played both sets. Needless to say, I was perplexed, and intrigued. {Strong Bad types and pronounces "intrigued" as intriguéd}

{Cut to The Field, at night. Strong Bad and Strong Sad are walking back home.}

STRONG BAD: So, help me out here. Were they missing some members? Where was their lead guitarist?

STRONG SAD: Uh, that was the whole band.

STRONG BAD: What?! You're not allowed to have a band with only three people in it! And something epse suspicious. What happened to the bassist's sunglasses? Did the lenses fall out?

STRONG SAD: No, Strong Bad, those were just regular glasses.

STRONG BAD: Shock and horror!

{Cut to The Basement. Strong Bad and Strong Sad are playing what looks like an Atari game}

STRONG BAD: But they must be like, a brand new band, right?

STRONG SAD: No, they've been around for five or six years now...

STRONG BAD: Then why haven't they grown their hair long yet?

STRONG SAD: I think those are just their haircuts, Strong Bad.

STRONG BAD: Really?

{Cut to the bathroom. Strong Sad is brushing his teeth, while Strong Bad is just standing there talking, holding his toothbrush.}

STRONG BAD: So somebody must've stolen their costume trailer, huh? Man, that's rough. They couldn't wear any of their spandex, or latex, or... Tex-mex...

STRONG SAD: {takes toothbrush out of mouth to speak} They don't wear costumes. They were probably just wearing what they've been wearing all day.

STRONG BAD: But... The music rocked.

STRONG SAD: {takes toothbrush out of mouth again to speak} Yes.

STRONG BAD: And they weren't wearing costumes.

STRONG SAD: {takes toothbrush out of mouth again to speak, and shakes his head} No.

STRONG BAD: Huh... Interesting.

{cut to a mud-bath area in the field. Strong Bad and Strong Sad both have towels on their heads and cucumber slices on their eyes. Strong Sad's stomach is sticking out of the top of the mud bath}

STRONG BAD: There were no high leg kicks, no choreographed spin moves... And that one guy even had his back to us all night.

{zoom-in to Strong Bad and Strong Sad}

STRONG BAD: It's like they don't even really care about me. Like when they played that song called 'We don't even really care about you'?

{Cut to The Basement. A sloshy CD in SeeDees is playing the just-mentioned song. Zoom out to Homestar and Strong Bad playing with Cheat Commandoes toys.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: And no pyrotechnics?

STRONG BAD: Nope. They just strung a bunch of Christmas lights over their bass drum.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {somewhat perturbed} And they still rocked?

STRONG BAD: Yeah, totally! And they can't be bothered to play solos, so they always leave a space to sing your own! Check out these mow da mows.

{Strong bad imitates an electric guitar solo. Homestar is unsurprizingly, amazed at this feat.}

STRONG SAD: {walking up} Hey, hey! slosh-ay!

STRONG BAD: slosh-ay!

HOMESTAR: You guys are so lame.

{Cut back to the Lappy}

STRONG BAD: {typing} And that's how sloshy became one of my favorite metal bands.

STRONG SAD: Uh, Strong Bad, I wouldn't exactly call sloshy metal.

STRONG BAD: What're you talkin' about? Of course they're metal. Look at the facts.

STRONG BAD: No costume.

{a costume appears on the screen, which is promptly X-ed out}

STRONG BAD: Short hair.

{long yellow hair appears, which promptly morphs into short hair}

STRONG BAD: ...A logo that's not jaggedy or drippety at all...

{a 'jaggedy,' non upside-down rendition of the sloshy logo appears, which then turns upside-down and becomes the normal sloshy logo}

STRONG BAD: And songs that aren't about girls... Los Angeles... or good... times...

{a CD appears with a track listing reading '1. Smokin' fine honey-child; 2. Sunset Strip(pers); 3. Party Patrol' appears, and then changes to read '1. ok fine; 2. unripe; 3. art troll'}

STRONG BAD: {record scratch} Hey, wait a minute! You tricked me! Sloshy's not metal!

STRONG SAD: I didn't trick you, I was just helping you broaden your horizons...

STRONG BAD: I'll broaden your horizons!

{Strong Bad grabs a sloshy record and slams it over Strong Sad's head, shattering it and leaving a piece embedded in the top of Strong Sad's head}

STRONG BAD: {typing} And that's how sloshy became one of my least favorite bands.

{New Paper slides down}

STRONG BAD: Ugh... That sound... It's got no punch. You just kinda slither out, like a boring lizard's tongue. Let's try this.

{Strong Bad pulls out a floppy disk and chucks it into the paper. It sticks at the top of the screen.}

{New Paper prints some more, now saying 'How ya like me now?' A grinding sound can be heard instead of the normal paper sound, and plastic chunks fall from where the floppy disk is}

STRONG BAD: There we go... We're good at least until you've completely shred that disk.

{New Paper retracts slightly. The grinding sound can be heard, and more plastic chunks fall.}

Easter Eggs

  • At the end, click on the word "favorite" to see a short scene with Senor Cardgage.
{Cut to the Field. Senor Cardgage is standing on a lawn mower. A bush is nearby.)
SENOR CARDGAGE: Why, hello, Miss Treta. Check out Senor Cardgage's Intregway.
{The Intregway logo appears beside him, then disappears}
SENOR CARDGAGE: Don't tell no mandy, {the words "Dump Tell No Mandy!" flash at bottom of screen} it's just a land mower turned bankways! If you help me buy it, I'll cut you in!
{Strong Bad eagerly runs over.}
STRONG BAD: I'll help you buy it! I'll help you buy it!
{Senor silently drives the Intregway offscreen.}
  • Click on the word "bands" at the end to see a clip of Limozeen: "but they're in space!".
{Mary sits in the Space Machine watching what sounds like basketball on ESPN Classic. Larry stands, watching as well with a displeased look. A whistle blow is heard.}
MARY: Wow! That Danny Ainge complains about every call! {begins eating what appears to be a basketball}
LARRY: I'm totally mesmerized by Kevin Mchale's armpit haaair! {gestures wildly with his hands} Oooeeuuh! {punches the air with one hand}
  • Click on the reflection of Strong Bad's diamond at the end to see where the mud baths came from.
{Strong Bad and Strong Sad are in their mud baths.}
STRONG BAD: Where did these mud baths come from? These things are awesome!
{The Poopsmith rises out of Strong Sad's bath, wearing a snorkel and goggles. Strong Bad and Strong Sad scream.}

Fun Facts

Remarks

  • Strong Sad claims to have never heard of Limozeen, despite the fact that he watched a cartoon starring them in best thing.
  • This is one of the few times Christmas has been directly mentioned in the Homestar Runner universe instead of Decemberween.
  • This is a rare occasion of Strong Bad being nice to Strong Sad.

Real-World References

External Links

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