cliffhangers

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Strong Bad Email #158
watch trading cards some kinda robot
"Prepare to be resolved!"

Strong Bad resolves three cliffhangers, and is then confronted by "sweet lady irony."

Cast (in order of appearance): Strong Bad, Homsar, The King of Town, Coach Z, Bubs/The Thnikkaman, The Cheat, Strong Mad, Strong Sad, Homestar Runner

Places: Computer Room, A Cliff, Coach Z's Locker Room, Inside The Proud Anselmo, Strong Sad's Room, Bubs' Concession Stand (Easter egg), The Office (Easter egg)

Computer: Lappy 486

Date: September 18, 2006

Running Time: 3:21

Page Title: Lappy 486

Contents

Transcript

STRONG BAD: {singing} Oooh, it's a e-email, money, money, money. Oooh-ooh. Shut up. {brings up email}

{Strong Bad reads "Jake" as "Little Jakey Pleasenthanks".}

STRONG BAD: {typing} Hmmmmm. The cliffhangers, eh? I never really thought to call them that, but I guess that is what they are. Yeah. Why not? {gets up, accompanied by the geddup noise}

{Cut to a face of a cliff. Homsar and the King of Town are both hanging from separate ropes, which are attached to the top of the cliff.}

HOMSAR: This dinner party is top dollar!

{Strong Bad is seen walking up to the edge of the cliff. Zoom in on him.}

STRONG BAD: Alright, cliffhangers. Prepare to be resolved!

{Strong Bad takes out a knife and slices both the ropes, causing the King of Town and Homsar to fall out of the shot.}

STRONG BAD: Oh, and I brought you some snacks.

{Strong Bad tosses some paper bags labeled "Hom" and "Kot" down the cliff.}

KING OF TOWN: {echoing} You're a good friend, Strong Bad!

{Strong Bad leaves. Cut back to Strong Bad's computer room. Strong Bad sits back down, and the screen has already been cleared.}

STRONG BAD: Alright, alright. I know what you really mean, Jakesy. So, you say you want a resolution, huh?

{Static away to the words "Cliffhanger #1" on a dark grey screen. Then, cut to the Locker Room. The Thnikkaman is crammed into a locker, bound with ropes. Coach Z is facing him.}

COACH Z: And now, Thnikkaman, at long last, the world will discover your secret, sorcret identity!

{Cut to a closeup of Coach Z's face.}

COACH Z: Thereby rendering you useless as a Thnikkaman!

{Cut back to the original view of the locker room.}

THNIKKAMAN: I'll render you toothless!

COACH Z: Now, give me them cool shades!

{Coach Z swipes at the Thnikkaman's "cool shades". Just as he's about to take them off, the frame freezes. Coach Z's arm is blurred. Zoom in, and play the "dun, dun, duuun" sound effect. The screen fades, and "Resolution" appears over the top in yellow text. This goes away, and we return to the scene—Coach Z misses the glasses and falls on his face.}

THNIKKAMAN: Yeah, shut up, Coach.

{The Thnikkaman jumps out of the locker on top of Coach Z, and walks off the left of screen. The usual singers chime in, the words flying across the screen.}

SINGERS: You missed unmasking the Thnikkaman!!! {slight pause} Because you have really bad hand-eye coordination!!!

COACH Z: Enough already, I get it! My secret sorcret has been revereled.

{The words "Cliffhanger #2" appear. Cut to Strong Bad in his Space Captainface outfit inside a cardboard spaceship, talking on a cardboard cell phone, with a little paper umbrella as an antenna.}

STRONG BAD: Yeah I know, Lita Ford... but I'm in orbit, baby! Look, I'll call you back when I'm not—

{Cut to The Cheat, dressed as Strap, who plays an alarm sound on a CD player, and turns a lamp with a red bulb on and off.}

STRONG BAD: Strap! Collision alarm! Bring it up on screen.

{Strong Mad takes away the piece of cardboard representing the screen, revealing a circular silhouette hanging from a piece of string, and holds up a sign reading "Malmsteen's Comet".}

STRONG BAD: We're on a collision course with Malmsteen's Comet! Full power to the forward humbuckers!

THE CHEAT: {anxious The Cheat noises}

{The Cheat points to a screen drawn on the cardboard that reads "The forward humbuckers have never worked!".}

STRONG BAD: Humbuckers are offline? Then strap in, Strap, and prepare for ramming speed! If this is the end, then we can at least make it awesome for the people in...

{Strong Bad looks out a side window labelled "the view" at a desktop globe of the Earth.}

STRONG BAD: Greenland.

{The Cheat plays a rockets firing sound on the CD player, and the ship starts shaking.}

STRONG BAD: Oooohhhh... Shooooooo....

{Everything freezes, and the same "dun, dun, duuun" sound effect plays.}

ANNOUNCER: Will Cap and Strap make it out of this one?

{Cut to the silhouetted comet, with a question mark overlaid, Strong Mad holds up a sign reading "Tune in NEXTime...".}

ANNOUNCER: Tune in next—

STRONG BAD: Nope, none of that, just get to resolving.

ANNOUNCER: Okay!

{Up comes the "Resolution" screen, then cut to Strong Bad and The Cheat holding on to each other as the ship shakes around them.}

STRONG BAD: This is it, Strap!

{The shaking stops, the rocket sound dies away, and the "comet" comes out of the silhouette, revealing it to actally be a moldy cantaloupe, with the label "grodalated cantaloupe".}

STRONG BAD: Wait a minute... that's no comet! We've wandered into the Forgotten Produce belt of Tablature 5!

{The cantaloupe is joined by a bunch of overripe bananas and an overripe avocado.}

STRONG BAD: It's guacamole and banana bread time, Strap!

{Some upbeat music plays, and Strong Bad and The Cheat dance to it. "Cliffhanger #3". Strong Sad and Homestar are standing around a table.}

STRONG SAD: Look, you can tell me.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: I can't!

STRONG SAD: Oh, come on, what is it?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: I'm... pregnant!

{Slow zoom in on Homestar, "dun, dun, duuun". Up comes the "Resolution" screen.}

STRONG SAD: No... no, you're Homestar. Runner. The male.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Oohhhh, phew. Thought I was a pregnant woman for a second there.

STRONG SAD: Yeah... uh... I think I'd like my money back now.

{Cut through static to Strong Bad walking back to the computer desk.}

STRONG BAD: And there you go, Jakenstein. All the cliffhangers have been re— Aah!

{The Lappy isn't on the desk; it has been replaced by a ransom note, which reads "i got your Lappy", and has a blood-splattered comma key from the keyboard.}

STRONG BAD: My computer's been Lappy-napped! And they cut off her little toe! Oh, sweet lady irony! Why do you mock me?

{"Dun, dun, duuun". The Paper comes down, reading "Tune in next time for the cliff hanging conclusion!!"}

Easter Eggs

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Yeah, yeah, you know who I think done it? Homestar Runner, think about it, think about it. He's got the history, he's got the motive...
STRONG BAD: Homestar, are you admitting that you stole my computer?
HOMESTAR RUNNER: What? No! I was just making watercooler conversation, trying to sound up with the times, uh, um, sports team?
  • Click on the power plug at the end to see a scene with Coach Z and Bubs at the concession stand:
COACH Z: Nah, I bet if you take away them cool shades and rip that "TH" {pronounced as the "th" in "three"} off his chest, underneath, you'd find a thin green man with a big ol' "Z" hanging from his—
BUBS: Coach, are you accusing yourself of being the Thnikkaman?
COACH Z: Yeah, I, uh— no! I, wuh, da, rumble-dumble sports team?!

Fun Facts

Explanations

  • An actual cliffhanger is a plot device where the end of a movie or TV show sees the story come to an end quite abruptly, without resolving some key issues, so that if the viewer wants to know how the story finishes, they will have to tune in to the next episode, or watch the next movie.
  • A humbucker is a type of guitar pick-up that uses two coils.
  • Tablature is a specialized type of sheet music for stringed instruments, such as guitar.
  • Homestar's line "I'm Pregnant" with a close up is a spoof of stereotypical soap operas in which an episode would end with such a cliffhanger.

Trivia

  • The floppy disk container reads "cake walk".
  • Below "the view" in the cardboard spaceship, there is a switch. Both positions of the switch are labelled "off".
  • Homestar's and Strong Bad's shirts in the Easter egg read "Just Disks" and "Data Boys" respectively.

Remarks

  • The Thnikkaman already took his shades off in monument without his secret identity being revealed.

Goofs

Strap in, Strap!
  • During most of the spaceship scene, the green ground is slightly cut off on the left side of the screen, so that a strip of white is visible along the black edge of the frame.

Inside References

  • Strong Bad first appeared as Space Captainface in space program.
  • When The Thnikkaman waddles away, he makes Homsar's walking noise.
  • The sticker on the cantaloupe says "grodalated", a word that first appeared in bedtime story.
  • This email marks another spoken reference to "Cool Shades."
  • Strong Bad wields a Big Knife in this email.
  • A cantaloupe also appears as Doreauxgard in lackey.
  • Strong Sad's stressing of Homestar's first and last name separately is similar to Homestar's introduction in his character video.
  • This is the second time Strong Bad has anthropomorphized an abstract concept as a "sweet lady", the first being "sweet lady freedom" in Strong Bad is in Jail Cartoon.
  • The King of Town is first shown hanging in a position like the one he's in on the cliff in Weclome Back, where he's stuck in a tire hanging from a tree; the rope is wrapped around him three times, perhaps to match the width of the tire.

Real-World References

  • "So you say you want a resolution, huh?" is a reference to the Beatles song "Revolution", specifically its hook "You say you want a revolution."
  • Malmsteen's Comet is a reference to Swedish guitar player Yngwie Malmsteen and Ace Frehley, lead guitarist for Kiss, and his solo album Frehley's Comet.
  • The bloody comma key on the ransom note that Strong Bad calls a "little toe" refers to the movie The Big Lebowski, in which a ransom note appears for a kidnapped woman along with a severed little toe.
  • The cover of Little Jakey Pleasenthanks (by Crazy Prof. Sportsinterviews) is drawn in the style of Dr. Seuss.
  • The left-hand "screen" picture in the cardboard spaceship and center "eye" when Space Captainface is on screen are from 2001: A Space Odyssey.
  • Lita Ford is a female glam metal rocker who became popular in the 80's.
  • Homestar's purple polo shirt in the Easter Egg is somewhat reminiscent of the character in the Big Lebowski played by John Turturro.
  • The Announcer in the second cliffhanger, also heard in fingers and alternate universe, is a reference to the original Batman TV series.
  • The "Y" in the word "Lappy" of the ransom note is similar to the YMCA logo.

External Links

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