candy product

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Strong Bad Email #149
watch disconnected some kinda robot
You got SBLOUNSKCHED!

Strong Bad gets his own candy product.

Cast (in order of appearance): Strong Bad, Senor Cardgage, Coach Z, Marzipan, Strong Sad, Homestar Runner (Easter egg), Marshie (Easter egg)

Places: Computer Room, Bathroom of the Brothers Strong, A Hill, An Alley, The Athletic Field, Marzipan's House, Strong Bad's Basement

Computer: Lappy 486

Date: March 21, 2006

Running Time: 2:58

Page Title: Lappy 486

Contents

Transcript

STRONG BAD: {as if talking into a microphone} Check one, check two. Sibilants. Sibilants. [1] SBEmail.

{While reading, Strong Bad says "Dear Strongbad I was wondering," as one clause, pronounces "dont" with a short O sound (as "daunt"), inserts exaggerated pauses where the ellipses are in the email, and says "somone" as a name.}

STRONG BAD: {typing} Well, of course you're not, Somone. Or else you would've fallen prey to Edgar's Baby's Daddy: my Homestar junkmail filter. {clears screen} So what I don't have a candy product. I betcha I will by the end of this email. I'm famous, popular, and chick-magnet enough to have a candy product. Why is it athletes are the only ones with their own candy bars? Shouldn't they have their own brand of, like, jock-strap or divorce lawyer, instead? {clears screen} For my candy bar, we're gonna need a name that's 50% Strong Bad, 50% tooth rot, and 50% ta-dah!!! How 'bou... SBLOUNSKCHED!

{A brown "SBLOUNSKCHED! bar" smashes onscreen, and then disappears.}

STRONG BAD: 'Cuz that's how you're gonna feel when you eat one...like you got SBLOUNSKCHED! {has trouble pronouncing the end} Now we gotta be sure and represent as many of the different states—

{A candy-based periodic table covers the screen.}

STRONG BAD: —of candy matter as possible. We’ll start with a gaseous cloud of marshmallow vapor—

{While Strong Bad says the second sentence, a pile of marshmallows appears from the left and puffs into a shiny, white vapor.}

STRONG BAD: —encased in a globule of semi-solid licorice colloid.

{As this is said, some black goo comes from behind and encases the vapor in a bubbly black sphere. It shrinks while it and many other identical blobs will the lower part of the screen as the next sentence starts.}

STRONG BAD: A bunch of those will be floating in a channel of liquid nougat—

{A wave of white nougat fills the lower half of the screen, and the licorice spheres are floating in the new stream.}

STRONG BAD: —which I recently found out is the candy equivalent of veal. And we roll all that up inside a solid crispety cookety log—

{At the end of the last sentence, a cookie dough log with chocolate chips wraps around the stream and puts it back to the center. It has a small stump sticking out with a leaf.}

STRONG BAD: —and cover it with rich, creamy... pepperoni.

{Seven slices of pepperoni drop along the top of the candy log.}

STRONG BAD: Then sprinkle that with, not just crispy puffed rice, but whole tiny bowls of crispy puffed rice cereal.

{As this is spoken, twelve tiny bowls of crispy puffed rice cereal drop onto the treat.}

STRONG BAD: And finally, smother that with the ol' BBC: Boring Brown Chocolate.

{Liquid chocolate is poured onto the candy and completely covers it.}

BRITISH-ACCENTED VOICE: I say...

STRONG BAD: Now that is a confection worthy of the SBLOUNSKCHED! name.

{"SBLOUNSKCHED!" appears on the candy.}

STRONG BAD: But I need to think of a better shape than the standard piece-of-crap shape.

{Cut to Strong Bad in the bathroom, reading a newspaper.}

STRONG BAD: I'm talkin' to you, Baby Ruth.

{Cut back to the Periodic Table.}

STRONG BAD: Let's see... shape, shape, shape, shape, shape—

{The candy rapidly morphs through a series of shapes: a chainsaw, a dollar sign, a thumbs-up, a syringe, a campfire, the state of Indiana, a moustache, and the bust of Van Buren.}

STRONG BAD: —ooh, what about my pants? Everybody knows my pants! And they come with a built-in bite out of them {chomp} for security, 'cause who's gonna steal a pair of half-eaten choco-pants?

{Cut back to computer}

STRONG BAD: {typing} Man, with a candy bar like that, you could get away with anything!

{A candy comercial begins. Fade in to a close-up of Strong Bad's feet and pants down a road towards the camera. The words "copyright 2006 Cheap As Free Foodstuffs" appear in the bottom-right corner for the first few seconds.}

STRONG BAD: {voiceover, singing} You’ve got the munch,—

{Cut to the same scene, except now focusing on the right of Strong Bad's upper body. You can see that he is holding a SBLOUNSKCHED! candy bar. When the words "Crisp" and "Crunch" are spoken, they appear on the left.}

STRONG BAD: —the crisp and the crunch,—

{The camera cuts to full shot of Strong Bad walking. You can see that he is going along an odd-looking hill.}

STRONG BAD: —livin’ in the gutter with—

{Senor Cardgage is in an alley, sleeping in a sleeping back and using his Aldi bag as a pillow. Strong Bad's silhouette is seen walking past the edge of the street.}

STRONG BAD: —grandmaaaa...

{Cut to Althetic Field, where Strong Bad is in the foreground watching Coach Z struggle with a basketball arond his head. On the scoreboard, CGNU has "0" points and TECH has "R".}

STRONG BAD: When coach puts you in,—

{Strong Bad turns to face the camera, holds a SBLOUNSKCHED! candy bar up to the camera and smiles.}

STRONG BAD: —you gotta go for the win.

{Cut to Strong Bad facing the Tandy 400. The Tandy says the following.}

STRONG BAD: —Y2K turned out all riiiight!

{When "all right" is sung, Strong Bad turns to face the camera and holds up the candy bar again. He also winks and gives a "thumbs-up" sign with his other hand. Cut to a blue background with the word "SBLOUNSKCHED" written repeated in the background. The candy bar's logo pops onscreen.}

STRONG BAD: {with chorus} SBLOUNSKCHED!

{Strong Bad is facing the camera. Behind him is an angry Marzipan with her art equipment, her easel broken over her head. Strong Bad raises the candy bar to the camera again, making Marzipan happy.}

STRONG BAD: You can do it!

{Cut back to the blue background. The logo pops onscreen again.}

STRONG BAD: {with chorus} SBLOUNSKCHED!

{Cut to Strong Bad in his basement. Strong Sad is hanging in the roof, his lower body seen struggling. Debris is visible on the floor beneath him. Strong Bad holds the candy bar up again and the hanging Strong Sad gives a "thumbs-up" sign.}

STRONG BAD: Crunchy chew it!

{Cut back to Strong Bad standing on the green hill, this time with the path gone. The camera circles around Strong Bad as the sung line appears onscreen and then fades away.}

STRONG BAD: {with chorus} Who’s got the money?!?

{Strong Bad jumps up.}

STRONG BAD: You got SBLOUNSKCHED!

{Strong Bad freezes in midair as the background changes back to the blue one with the logo beneath him. As the TV announcer speaks, two candy bars appear on the left and a yellow oval with the message "Dentist Acknowledged" appears on the right.}

TV ANNOUNCER: {speaking very rapidly} Buy one and you can get one free root canal or cavity search.

{The Paper comes down. Shortly after Strong Bad moves his head to the side to peek around.}

Footnote

  1. This could also be "Sibilance. Sibilance."

Easter Eggs

Egdar's Baby's Daddy
  • Click "Edgar's Baby's Daddy" to see Strong Bad's Homestar junkmail filter.
Edgar´s Baby´s Daddy
H*R Junkmail Filta
Subject Time Sender
Re: Besing Friends
Draw Trogdor again ;)
Re: re: re: resending
Re: PharmBlacy news
Possible caper
Rrrrates so low!!!!
Shemp vs. Curly Joe
It's almost 10:25!!
10:22
10:22
10:23
10:23
10:23
10:24
10:24
10:24
Homestar Runner
Homestar Runner
Homestar Runner
Homestar Runner
Homestar Runner
Homestar Runner
Homestar Runner
Homestar Runner
  • At the end of the e-mail, click the front SBLOUNSKCHED! bar to see a short scene of Homestar (dressed as a robber) preparing to steal a discarded candy product.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Ooh, paydirt! A pair of half-eaten choco-pants!
  • Also click the SBLOUNSKCHED! logo below the candy bars to see a short scene of Marshie's face appearing in the gaseous marshmallow vapor.
MARSHIE: {creepy, distorted voice} You can't destroy me!

Fun Facts

Explanations

  • Although the word colloids has several meanings, in this situation it refers to small particles that are suspended within the substance that contains them.
  • Sibilants (or "sibilance") is a word commonly used when testing microphones to make sure that sibilant sounds ("s", "sh", "z", and "zh") are picked up properly.
  • The date shown on the Tandy 400 is Friday, December 31, 1999. It is possible that Strong Bad was changing the date to avoid the year 2000 problem.

Trivia

Da NewsPapes
Da NewsPapes
World events continued for the 43rd
consecutive day. This is just 3 shy of
the all-time record of 46. Many believe
this to be a sign of things to come. Ed
Bache concurs. "This is a sign of
things to come."

Back Pape
Famous couples were spotted eating,
walking around, and on movie screens
across the country.

Remarks

  • Strong Bad's candy bar comes packaged in two different rectangular shapes — the first resembling the old Choco-Lite bar or a Nestlé Crunch with Caramel, and the second resembling a Kit Kat — in spite of the fact that the bar itself is supposed to be shaped like a pair of pants.
  • During the SBLOUNSKCHED! commercial, you can't adjust the contrast knobs on the Tandy 400 as you normally could.
  • This email is false, Strongbad refered to Strongbad gum in 2 emails.

Goofs

  • There used to be no back button at the end of the e-mail. It was fixed within a day of the email's release.

Inside References

  • "Re: re: re: resending" is a possible reference to bottom 10, where Strong Bad explains that he hates emails that have more than one Fwd:, or Re: in the subject line.
  • "Draw Trogdor again ;)" is a reference to dragon.
  • This is another example of characters peeking from behind objects in the foreground.
  • One of the rejected forms for the candy bar is the bust of Van Buren.
  • At the beginning of the commercial, small print at the bottom reveals that it is a production of Cheap As Free Foodstuffs.
  • Marshie's creepy voice in the Easter egg is similar to an Easter egg in Pumpkin Carve-nival.
  • During the SBLOUNSKCHED! jingle, the scoreboard behind Coach Z reads CGNU, the initialism of Crazy Go Nuts University.
    • The team "playing" against CGNU is "TECH", a reference to mascot's match between CGNU and Homestar's Knee's Tech.
  • "Edgar's Baby's Daddy" is another instance of Edgar based computer protection software, first seen in virus (as Edgar) as an anti-virus program, and also in long pants (as Edgar Jr.) as a paragraph filter.
  • "Possible caper" refers to caper.
  • "Da NewsPapes" is a reference to the newspapers in stunt double and dangeresque 3, which were called "The Local Newspapes".
  • We previously saw Senor Cardgage sleeping in the Back Alley in Senorial Day.
  • The camera rotating around Strong bad while he's standing on the hill is a possible reference to Old Intro 2.

Real-World References

  • The "SBLOUNSKCHED!" commercial refers to ads for candies like Mentos where it is suggested that consumers of the product can do anything at all.
  • Baby Ruth is a popular candy bar 2 oz. in size in a log-shaped form. Strong Bad's allusion to its scatological appearance is most likely a reference to a like-minded gag in the film Caddyshack.
  • BBC actually stands for British Broadcasting Corporation, which may explain why the English voice is offended by Strong Bad's interpretation.
  • "Sibilance," a word describing the "s" sound, was used by Tom Hanks in a Wayne's World sketch on Saturday Night Live in a soundcheck for Aerosmith.
  • The "built-in bite" shape of SBLOUNSKCHED! may refer to Grizzly Chomps, a Hostess-brand treat introduced in 1992. The package included two chocolate cupcakes with a bite-mark shape cut out of them, and the package bore a cartoon bear saying, "I start 'em, you finish 'em."
  • "Crispity" is a made-up word used in advertisements, along with "crunchity" and "peanut-buttery," to describe the Butterfinger candy bar.
  • Shemp Howard and "Curly Joe" DeRita served the role as the third of the Three Stooges at various points in the act's history.

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