boring (really)

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A little less than two fifty.

Strong Bad Email #131

Callie asks if it ever gets boring where Strong Bad lives, and he answers it a bit too well.

Cast (in order of appearance): Strong Bad, Bubs, Homestar Runner, Strong Sad, Coach Z, Pom Pom (Easter egg), The King of Town (Easter Egg), Homsar (Easter egg), The Poopsmith (Easter egg), Pom Pom's girls (Easter Egg)

Places: Computer Room, Bubs' Concession Stand, The Stick, King of Town's Castle (Easter egg)

Computer: Lappy 486

Date: June 06, 2005

Running Time: 4:44

Contents

Transcript

STRONG BAD: {rapping} E-mail theme song! 1-2-3! A da-da-checka e-mail wit' me, SB, y'all! {loads the email}

{Strong Bad says "Strobah" in place of "Strongbad," "groan" in place of "crap," and pronounces "TX" as "Tejas".}

STRONG BAD: {typing} So, you're bored out of your mind, eh? Well, you've come to the right place. Let's see what I...can do...about...that. {really draws "that" out, like "thaaaaaahhht"}

{Strong Bad exits stage left, and the screen zooms out on the Lappy. It then shows Bubs' face from very close up, and zooms out to show Bubs looking at the side of his concession stand while Strong Bad joins him. All the dialogue until Strong Sad's line is said at an exaggeratedly slow pace.}

STRONG BAD: Bubs! What craziness...is going on... over here?

{short pause}

BUBS: Oh! Strong Bad! {Strong Bad begins to slowly look towards Bubs} You startled me! I was just counting the bricks on this side of the building! I'm up to two hundred forty-eight!

STRONG BAD: Two hundred and forty-eight! That's just a little less than two fifty!

BUBS: Yep! I remember learning that in school!

STRONG BAD: Well, take care... Bubs. I'm gonna take real, {camera zooms in on Strong Bad's mouth} real {camera moves back} tiny steps on over to The Stick. {exits stage right — very slowly}

{another short pause}

BUBS: Be's careful!

{The screen cuts to a closeup behind Bubs, then cuts with Bubs slightly further across on the wall, counting bricks. Cut to Strong Bad, still walking in tiny steps, approaching Homestar Runner standing by the Stick. Homestar isn't blinking, and his mouth is open.}

STRONG BAD: What are you... um... doing?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: I'm practicing... closing... my eyes. I'm not very... good... at it... though.

STRONG BAD: I see.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: More like... I see.

{Close up on Homestar closing his eyes slowly, with a tremble when they're nearly closed, eventually closing them completely}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Ooh! There we go! Now I see what all the fuss is about! {opens eyes} Oops, I lost it. {Bubs enters from stage left}

BUBS: Two hundred and ninety-six!

STRONG BAD: Wow. 1
HOMESTAR RUNNER: {almost simultaneously} Wow!

HOMESTAR RUNNER: That's just a little less... than three hundred!

ALL: I remember learning that in school!

{Strong Sad suddenly jumps in under the influence of caffeine, accompanied by the background music of the "Da Sturge" radio station, interrupting "school" as flames burst on the sides of the screen for a split second.}

STRONG SAD: Wah-wah-wah-wait! You guys! You guys! I struck gold on the alien spaceship—I think it gave me super powers! There were wood-davers everywhere!

{record scratching noise cuts back to Strong Bad at the Lappy}

STRONG BAD: {typing} So, Jackson, as you can plainly see, things move a mile a minute 'round her'. Except for that Strong Sad. That guy's a real bore. And quite a fan of Danish physicist Niels Bohr. The most aptly named of all Danish physicists. So, I hope I bored you back into your mind. And I don't mean 'bored into your mind' like REEER! Pssh pssh! {typed as "(awesome drilling some brains sound)"}. That's gross. But if you're still bored, sit back, relax, and prepare to experience the fury of... me naming all the three letter words I can think of. {Strong Bad makes an imitation of a walkie-talkie click, then clears his throat and brings up new screen} Cat. The. Lob. Irk. Try. Wet. Cod. For. Her. Ebb. Egg. Goo. Elk. Ilk. {The Paper comes down.} Dog. Fat. Pat. Spy. Get. Sat. Sit. {screen dims} Wow. Man. {After a few seconds, the screen comes back up with many more words typed as Strong Bad continues to list words} Huh. Not. Sty. Eye. Pie. Tug. Gut. Gun. Sap. Asp. Pus. Job —

COACH Z: {record scratching noise, then from offscreen:} I gotta stop you there, Strong Bad. I'm pretty sure "jorb" is a four letters word.

Footnotes

  1. This could be "Whoa."

Easter Eggs

  • Click on "Niels Bohr" to see a signed picture of him addressed to Strong Sad.
    • The autograph reads
      yo yo, S²
      you're not
      BOHRN yet!
      ha ha!! —Nilly `16
  • At the end, click on "try, wet, cod" for a pencil drawing of a fish on notebook paper, with the text "Try wet cod!!! (Please, oh, please)".
  • Click on "err" for a comic book drawing of Strong Bad and The Cheat.
    • The comic book drawing is a reference to Groo the Wanderer, written and drawn by Sergio Aragonés. Groo, a stupid barbarian who often makes mistakes, has the catch phrase "Did I err?".
  • Click on "old, bag" to see a short scene at a party thrown by the King of Town.
    {Pom Pom, the King of Town, the Poopsmith, and Homsar are standing in the King's castle with two of Pom Pom's girls. Two bags marked "PORK RAMBLINS" and "PORK SNAGGLINS" can be seen in the foreground. "It's the Weekend" (from montage) can be heard in the background, as the party guests make a poor and somewhat unintelligible attempt at singing along.}

Fun Facts

Strong Bad's list of 3-letter words

  • Note that "man" is listed twice (On the second line, third word from the right, and on the sixth line, second word from the right).
  • The word "use" is also listed twice (On the third line, seventh word from the left, and on the seventh line, third word from the right).
    • Perhaps he listed it once for "use" as in "I use this" and once as in "I have a use for this."
  • There is no comma after "dew" (last word on second line).

Inside References

  • One of the three-letter words Strong Bad types is "sbu" (fifth line, sixth word from the left), which is a reference to lunch special.
  • Strong Bad says "Prepare to experience the fury of... me naming all the three letter words I can think of." in his tour guide voice from theme park, from which the first half of said line was taken. He ends with the sound of the microphone clicking off, also heard in theme park.
  • Strong Sad's hyperactivity, twitching eye and mention of wood-davers are references to caffeine.
    • This scene also re-uses the Deathly Pallor music from radio.
  • Coach Z's comment on "jorb" being a four-letter word is a reference to A Jorb Well Done.
  • "A four letters word" may be a nod to Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 11.2, in which said phrase was used by Homestar.
  • The way Strong Bad runs when taking "real tiny steps" is similar to how his past self ran the Ten-Step Footrace in flashback.

External Links

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