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strongbad_email.exe Bonus Email #3

Wilbur asks Strong Bad's opinion on the effects of video games on children. This email takes place in the Compy 386 era.

Cast (in order of appearance): Strong Bad, Wilbur

Transcript

STRONG BAD: {singing} There comes a time, when you read a certain email. {reads email}

Dear Strong Bad,
What is your opinion of the effects
of in video games on children? Are
video games harmful to the
development of the human brain?

sincerely,
Wilbur, Seattle, WA

{Strong Bad sings "WA" as a high note (prounounced "wa")}

STRONG BAD: Ohh, Wilbur. Sounds an awful lot like a little video game programming version of The Cheat.

{A balding creature with a human head, long hair, glasses, a beard, and a The Cheat body appears on the screen momentarily}

STRONG BAD: {typing} No way, Wilbur. Video games actually teach you all kindsa new stuff. Think of all the words we've learned from video games. {clears screen} There's "strafe." Who ever used strafe before they started putting it in video games? They used to just say, "walk sideways and shoot." Then there's "toggle." Y'know, you gotta toggle between the missles and the lasers. {clears screen} And who could forget "melee." Which I can only assume means, "a buncha peoples fighting, like, all at the same time." Plus, most video games provide a veritable what-not-to-do of spelling and grammar. {stops typing} Just give a kid a video game instruction booklet

{The cover of the instruction manual for "Strong Sad's Strafing/Toggling Challenge!!" appears on the screen}

STRONG BAD: {continuing} and play "Find the complete sentence." That's plenty educational!

{The manual turns to Page One, which reads as follows}

Play for best!!
- top score wins choice
- d+pad UP for combo
- remember alert!
Always to stop scoring. Challenge again!

{The manual disappears, and Strong Bad resumes responding}

STRONG BAD: {typing} And who doesn't remember staying up all night to beat an end boss only to be rewarded with a hearty {typed in big, bold, golden letters} CONGRATURATION! {resumes typing normally} They didn't even bother giving you multiple ones. Just a single congraturation they had lying around the video game make place.

{cut to an office setting. A balding creature with short hair, glasses, and a moustache and a The Cheat body is standing by a computer, while Wilbur is standing near a box of "congraturations!", which look like muffins. A Broderbund Software and Jumpman poster are in the background. Text in the corner reads "AT THE VIDEO GAME PLACE"}

BALD GUY: Hey man, you gonna eat that last Congraturation?

WILBUR: Naw, man. I'm puttin' it in the game if you beat the end boss.

{Cut back to Strong Bad at the Compy 386}

STRONG BAD: {angrily} Big cheap stupid waste of my time! They're being jerks!

{The Paper comes down}

Fun Facts

• The font on the instruction manual for "Challenge!!" is the same as the font used for Axesome Cross.
• The controller cartoon Strong Sad is holding in the instruction manual is very similar to the oldschool NES controllers.
• Broderbund Software is a now-defunct game development house, most well known for making Lode Runner.
• Jumpman was the original name of Mario.
• The text reading "AT THE VIDEO GAME PLACE" is a reference to comic book text boxes that served the same purpose.
• "CONGRATURATION" might be a sly reference to the NES game 1942, known for being almost unbearably hard and only having the word "CONGRATULATION" as its ending screen.
• The bad english throughout the email is a reference to the poor Japanese/English translation that often happened in old video games.

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