Teen Girl Squad Issue 15

From Homestar Runner Wiki

Revision as of 14:30, 11 May 2009 by OptimisticFool (Talk | contribs)
Jump to: navigation, search
Teen Girl Squad Issue #15
watch Issue 14 Issue 1


Cast (in order of appearance): Cheerleader, So and So, What's Her Face, The Ugly One, Science Fiction Greg, D N'D Greg, Open Source Greg, Japanese Culture Greg, Chizuko, Arrow'd! Guy, Fatty's Big Chance, Band Name Boys, Color Guard Maiden, Tompkins, Short Girl, Cheerleader Brian, Maniosos Ugly One, Gutted Sheep, Peacey P (Easter Egg), Olympic Man (Easter Egg)

Places: The Field, Conference Room C

Date: Monday, May 11, 2009

Running Time: 4:11

Page Title: Light Purple Cummerbund!

Transcript

NARRATOR STRONG BAD: Teen Girl Squad! Cheerleader! {strapless!} So and So! {puffy sleeves!} What's Her Face! {tie and t-shirt!} The Ugly One! {leftover brine?}

{Open to Cheerleader facing the other three girls.}

CHEERLEADER: Oh my grash, gals! Guess who just got a date for the priggity prizom?!

WHAT'S HER FACE: {looking befuddled} I'm a little rusty on my white girl gangsta. Does that mean you're dating a pretty prism?

{Close-up of So and So}

SO AND SO: No no, that's the name of this year's prom. {suddenly looks deranged and her speech bubble appears to be melting} I was on every committee ever. {no longer deranged, her speech bubble is now rectangular} It's called Priggidy Prizom: {the following words are in a different font and a rose appears on each side of them} Thugchantment at the Cloughb.

{Cut back to the four girls.}

CHEERLEADER: So, again I ask, gresh who got a date for the prom?

SO AND SO: Me.

WHAT'S HER FACE: Me.

THE UGLY ONE: Me.

{Cut to a close-up of Cheerleader looking angry.}

CHEERLEADER: Let me rephrase. {face changes to have a big smile and a pig snout} Guess who got a non-Greg date for the prom?

{cut back to the four girls, Cheerleader has beams coming from her face}

SO AND SO: Oh.

WHAT'S HER FACE: Oh.

THE UGLY ONE: Oh.

{cut to a view of the Gregs}

SCIENCE FICTION GREG: So I figure we'll teleport into the prom to make a really grand entrance. {begins to flicker on the last three words} Anyone know where I can get some endurium? {flickers again on the last word}

{Cut to a view of Japanese Culture Greg standing at a distance from the other three Gregs with a shiny-looking girl.}

JAPANESE CULTURE GREG: Come on Chizuko {his head appears animeish on the last word}, we're too cool for the prom anyway.

CHIZUKO: {exaggeratedly moves her arms and legs whilst speaking, her speech bubble is rectangular} Welcome, American investor, to the 2005 Consumer Robotics Show!

SCIENCE FICTION GREG: You'd think I'd be interested in life-size, realistic robots {cut to close-up of Science Fiction Greg}, but that thing makes me wanna barf up my earlier energy drink into the one I'm currently drinking. {holds up a can of energy drink labeled "Greg Fuel"}

{cut to Japanese Culture Greg and Chizuko; Chizuko shoots ray out of her eyes at Japanese Culture Greg, whose limb begin to detach from his body}

NARRATOR STRONG BAD: UNCANNY VALLEY'D!

JAPANESE CULTURE GREG: THIS IS A DREAM COME TRUE!

{Cut back to the four girls}

CHEERLEADER: That's right, I just grot asked to the prom {shows a photograph} by Cheerleader Brian! {on the last two words, cut to closeup of a picture of Cheerleader Brian}

{Cut back to the girls; So and So and What's Her Face look skeptical.}

SO AND SO: Cheerleader Cheerleader, you're going to the prom with Cheerleader Brian?

WHAT'S HER FACE: Isn't that like going to the prom with your dad?

THE UGLY ONE: And we've all been there, right gals?

{The other three look skeptically at The Ugly One. Cut to a close-up of So-and-So, still looking skeptical.}

SO AND SO: Uh... so... {face changes to a goblin-like one} How much did everybody's dress cost?

CHEERLEADER: {entering from the left and yelling and So and So, whose face has reverted to normal} MORE THAN YOURS!

THE UGLY ONE: {entering from the right and yelling at So and So before Cheerleader is finished} LESS THAN YOURS!

{Cut back to the four girls with What's Her Face facing the others; Cheerleader and The Ugly One are still angry; So and So is kneeling on the ground between them.}

WHAT'S HER FACE: Um, what is this... "dress" you speak of? Is a... food?

NARRATOR STRONG BAD: KRAKOW! {the word explodes into existence above What's Her Face's head}

{Cut to the right, where Arrow'd Guy appears out of cloud with rays beaming onto What's Her Face.}

ARROW'D GUY: You do not belong at the junior prom, What's Her Face!

WHAT'S HER FACE: I don't?

ARROW'D GUY: You will come into your own in college, and thrive!

WHAT'S HER FACE: {smiling} I will?

ARROW'D GUY: Heh. No. Sparrow'd. {Sparrows fly out of his mouth and into What's Her Face.}

WHAT'S HER FACE: A new twist on an old classic!

{Cut to a shot of a man's face, his mustache reads "AT THE PROM". Cut to a room with Cheerleader Brian, Cheerleader and So and So, the girls are dressed for the prom.}

CHEERLEADER: Conference room C at the Sheraton! It's even more magical than I ever dreamed!

SO-AND-SO: I can't believe we got a cardboard cutout of Tenerence Love to play our Junior Prom!

{Cut to a scene of the prom which pans to the right as Tenerence Love sings. As the scene pans, we see Fatty's Big Chance, the Band Name Boys, the Color Guard Maiden embracing Tompkins, and the Short Girl before finally the cardboard cutout of Tenerence Love appears.}

TENERENCE LOVE: {singing throughout the scene above} Light purple cummerbund, you know you're my only one, don't need no date to the prom, 'cause I got a light purple cummerbund on. {the cardboard cutout of Tenerence Love falls over}

{Cut to Cheerleader and Cheerleader Brian}

CHEERLEADER BRIAN: This place has SPIRIT!

CHEERLEADER: {slaps Cheerleader Brian} Oh, shut it off, will ya?

{Cut to So and So standing to the right of Science Fiction Greg, who is wearing a suit.}

SCIENCE FICTION GREG: So, So and So, I'm so sorry Open Source Greg stood you up so. {in a separate, smaller speech bubble} Oh.

SO AND SO: {looking angry} Oh, he didn't. He just sent his avatar {cut to the right, where a robot holding a pike and with the text "xxUBUNTFAN91xx" above its head is standing} "in his stead".

OPEN SOURCE GREG: {voiceover} Here, let me help you with that corsage. {; the text lifts So and So slightly into the air} It doubles as a thumb drive. {this text appears, lifting So and So slightly higher} I make them myself! {this text appears and lifts So and So higher still}

NARRATOR STRONG BAD: BETRAYAL! {the robot attacks So and So with the pike and splits her in two}

OPEN SOURCE GREG: {voiceover} All her save data! Lost! {the text he speaks again appears below So and So after the text "xxUBUNTUFAN91xx says:>"}

{Cut to D n' D Greg with The Ugly One, both of whom are dressed for the prom.}

THE UGLY ONE: Thanks for dinner, D n' D Greg. So exotic. I mean, southwestern eggrolls? {Throughout her second sentence, a hand begins reaching in from the left.}

NARRATOR STRONG BAD: DADGRASP! {The hand grasps D n' D Greg and pulls him to the left.}

{Cut to Manolios Ugly One standing to the left of D n' D Greg}

MANOLIOS UGLY ONE: So okay, Romeo {pronounced "roh-MAY-oh"}. You think you're so great? Captain of the basketball force? You lay one finger on my daughter,

{cut to a scene of a sheep with a hole in its torso and visible entrails}

SHEEP: It's not so bad!

MANOLIOS UGLY ONE: No, I'm a joke. Gonna marry my little girl? {hanging from above} I gut you like sheep. {from the right} How much you make? {back on the left, a little lower than before} I gut you like sheep. {hanging from above and to the right} Got good knees? {in his original spot} I gut you like sheep. {from the lower right, a half of stereo appears to D n' D Greg's left} Half stereo, two seventy-five... {hanging from above} ...like sheep.

D N' D GREG: I can assure you, Mr. Gly-One, I have never played a single bounce of basketball in my life.

MANOLIOS UGLY ONE: {holding a knife, D n' D Greg has a hole in his torso and visble ribs and entrails} I gut you like sheep.

D N' D GREG: Owww! Sheep, you lied!

{Cut to Cheerleader dancing with Cheerleader Brian.}

CHEERLEADER: Feel free to get slightly less appropriate with those hands, Cheerleader Brian.

CHEERLEADER BRIAN: {throwing his arms up in the air, Cheerleader falls back in surprise} Oh, you mean like awesome prom SPIRIT!! {cut to Cheerleader Brian holding Cheerleader above his head} And rip a cupie into a cradle catch!}

CHEERLEADER: {still in the air, near the spinning disco ball} PUT ME DOWN! I'M OFF DUTY!

NARRATOR STRONG BAD: PRETTY PRISM! {the disco ball shoots a ray of light at Cheerleader}

{Cut to Cheerleader Brian looking at Cheerleader's intact lower body and the charred remains of her upper body lying on the floor.}

THE UGLY ONE: {jumping in from the right} Come on girls! Memories! Memories! {The previous two words appear in the speech bubble as she says them and move up and down, then disappear when she moves to the next sentence.} We gotta hurry up and get our pictures taken before...

NARRATOR STRONG BAD: IT'S OVER! {Cut to the "It's over" screen.} Chi-click!

{The final scene fades in. The Ugly One is standing in the center of a room with balloons on either side and a banner reading "Priggidy Prizom 2009" across the room. Cheerleader's half-charred remains are to the left of The Ugly One, What's Her Face is sitting down with sparrows sticking into her on the right of The Ugly One. So and So's lower half is upside-down to the far left, her upper half is to the extreme right.}

Fun Facts

External Links

Personal tools
Subtitles