From Homestar Runner Wiki

Revision as of 00:17, 6 February 2007 by Lapper (Talk | contribs)
(diff) ← Older revision | Current revision (diff) | Newer revision → (diff)
Jump to: navigation, search
Subtitles logo These are the English subtitles for retirement A. watch this toon
To watch the toon with subtitles, we recommend that you install either the All-In-One Greasemonkey script for Firefox or the Homestar All-In-One extension for Chrome.
It will give you the option to automatically display subtitles when you view toons on and those mirrored locally. Alternatively, you may use our local viewer.

en  de  he  es  fr  nl  fi  pl  pt-br  tr

<?xml version="1.0" encoding="utf-8"?>
<transcript xml:lang="en-us" file="sbemail159a.swf" width="550" height="400">
<line start="16" end="41" speaker="strongbad">My computer's been lappynapped!</line>
<line start="41" end="57">
<sfx>record scratches</sfx>
<marshie>Hello, Kenneth!</marshie>
<line start="59" end="83" speaker="marshie">Hear me roar!</line>
<line start="87" end="90" speaker="sfx">growl</line>
<line start="90" end="99" speaker="sfx">meow</line>
<line start="100" end="110" speaker="marshie">That's right, kids!</line>
<line start="111" end="151" speaker="marshie" voiceover="voiceover">Play the Fluffy Puff Marshmallows My Lappy Got Stole! Sweepstakes and</line>
<line start="152" end="178" speaker="marshie">win <em>big!</em></line>
<line start="184" end="196" speaker="marshie" voiceover="voiceover">First prize,</line>
<line start="198" end="211" speaker="marshie" voiceover="voiceover">second tries,</line>
<line start="212" end="252" speaker="marshie"><em>(singing)</em>Take a trip to the mountains...</line>
<line start="252" end="273" speaker="marshie">I'm a song and dance man!</line>
<line start="276" end="305" speaker="marshie" voiceover="voiceover">Just email who you think done it on a 3x5 notecard,</line>
<line start="306" end="333" speaker="marshie" voiceover="voiceover">stick a Fluffy Puff on each corner,</line>
<line start="334" end="381" speaker="marshie">and just walk away, mother...</line>
<line start="382" end="432" speaker="marshie">Fluffy Puff Marshmallows. Yeah! Still!</line>
<line start="434" end="456" speaker="strongbad">You gotta be kidding me.</line>
<line start="457" end="513" speaker="strongbad">Man, everybody's trying to make a buck or nine off my heart-drooping loss.</line>
<line start="525" end="568" speaker="strongbad">Oh, perfect. Now I'm out of my antidepressant.</line>
<line start="572" end="609" speaker="strongbad">Nothing dulls the pain quite like several dozen half-full bags of</line>
<line start="614" end="618" speaker="strongbad">Italian-<span style="visibility:hidden">herb-chipotle-buffalo-ranch-guacamole-Thai-peanut-style chippety-chumps.</span></line>
<line start="618" end="622" speaker="strongbad">Italian-herb-<span style="visibility:hidden">chipotle-buffalo-ranch-guacamole-Thai-peanut-style chippety-chumps.</span></line>
<line start="622" end="627" speaker="strongbad">Italian-herb-chipotle-<span style="visibility:hidden">buffalo-ranch-guacamole-Thai-peanut-style chippety-chumps.</span></line>
<line start="627" end="632" speaker="strongbad">Italian-herb-chipotle-buffalo-<span style="visibility:hidden">ranch-guacamole-Thai-peanut-style chippety-chumps.</span></line>
<line start="632" end="636" speaker="strongbad">Italian-herb-chipotle-buffalo-ranch-<span style="visibility:hidden">guacamole-Thai-peanut-style chippety-chumps.</span></line>
<line start="636" end="642" speaker="strongbad">Italian-herb-chipotle-buffalo-ranch-guacamole-<span style="visibility:hidden">Thai-peanut-style chippety-chumps.</span></line>
<line start="642" end="645" speaker="strongbad">Italian-herb-chipotle-buffalo-ranch-guacamole-Thai-<span style="visibility:hidden">peanut-style chippety-chumps.</span></line>
<line start="645" end="649" speaker="strongbad">Italian-herb-chipotle-buffalo-ranch-guacamole-Thai-peanut-style<span style="visibility:hidden"> chippety-chumps.</span></line>
<line start="649" end="665" speaker="strongbad">Italian-herb-chipotle-buffalo-ranch-guacamole-Thai-peanut-style chippety-chumps.</line>
<line start="669" end="715" speaker="strongbad">I guess I'll slink off to Bubs' and refill my prescription.</line>
<line start="723" end="745" speaker="strongbad">Slinnnk...</line>
<line start="759" end="770" speaker="strongbad">Bubs!</line>
<line start="774" end="786" speaker="strongbad">Hello?</line>
<line start="793" end="808" speaker="strongbad">Can I get a witness?</line>
<line start="817" end="825" speaker="strongbad">Bubs?</line>
<line start="831" end="838" speaker="strongbad" volume="1.2">Aaaah!</line>
<line start="838" end="859" speaker="strongbad" volume="1.2" voiceover="voiceover">The Lappy's tail!</line>
<line start="860" end="892">
<strongbad voiceover="voiceover">I'll save you, Lappy-pie... poo...</strongbad>
<sfx>suspenseful music plays</sfx>
<line start="898" end="951" speaker="strongbad">Just keep your pixels on. Strong Bad's got everything under control-alt-delete.</line>
<line start="969" end="990" speaker="strongbad">Who put you up here— Wha?!?</line>
<line start="1001" end="1034" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">It's my crappier and crappiest computers!</line>
<line start="1038" end="1052" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">Careful guys,</line>
<line start="1052" end="1091" speaker="strongbad">let's not do anything inappropriate with that magnet...</line>
<line start="1091" end="1136" speaker="strongbad">I've got a lot of important text files on that 5 meg hard drive...</line>
<line start="1141" end="1193" speaker="strongbad">Now just let the Lappy go, and we can all go out for Hushpuppies.</line>
<line start="1195" end="1221" speaker="strongbad">You guys still like Hushpuppies, don't you?</line>
<line start="1227" end="1244" speaker="sfx">pops and fizzes</line>
<line start="1245" end="1272" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">Okay, fine. Hushpuppies are out.</line>
<line start="1275" end="1311" speaker="strongbad">For some reason I... I thought you guys liked Hushpuppies.</line>
<line start="1311" end="1337" speaker="sfx">lots of sparks and fizzes</line>
<line start="1338" end="1361" speaker="strongbad">Sorry guys, we're getting nowhere.</line>
<line start="1362" end="1398" speaker="strongbad">I don't speak extravagantly broken computer.</line>
<line start="1400" end="1412" speaker="sfx">Preeeeeow!</line>
<line start="1412" end="1454" speaker="strongbad">The Paper! You're just in time! Find out what they want!</line>
<line start="1454" end="1474" speaker="sfx">Compy 386 clicks and fizzes</line>
<line start="1475" end="1485" speaker="sfx">Preeeeow!</line>
<line start="1485" end="1530" speaker="strongbad">Retirement? They didn't retire, I threw them away.</line>
<line start="1532" end="1569" speaker="strongbad">Ask them if they mean they want to come out of thrown-awayment.</line>
<line start="1572" end="1586" speaker="sfx">Preeeeow!</line>
<line start="1596" end="1611" speaker="strongbad">Are they joking?</line>
<line start="1611" end="1683" speaker="strongbad">Those guys couldn't check an email with the help of sixty horses dressed up as IT professionals!</line>
<line start="1692" end="1704" speaker="sfx">buzzer</line>
<line start="1706" end="1741" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">Okay, okay, okay! I'll do my best.</line>
<line start="1744" end="1794" speaker="strongbad">If it'll save the orphanage... I mean, my Lappy, I'll do it.</line>
<line start="1796" end="1842" speaker="strongbad">Now, let's check emails like it was the deuce double-ought dweice!</line>
<line start="1849" end="1862" speaker="sfx">old computers spark and fizz</line>
<line start="1864" end="1937" speaker="strongbad">It just means 2002... I... thought it was slick... slick-rick... way to talk...</line>
<line start="1956" end="2033" speaker="strongbad"><em>(singing)</em> Green lines, green, green lines. It's a Strong Bad Email again.</line>
<line start="2037" end="2056" speaker="strongbad">"Dearest Strong Bad,"</line>
<line start="2059" end="2095" speaker="strongbad">"Do you remember the email that you deleted the hardest?"</line>
<line start="2098" end="2107" speaker="strongbad">"Sincerly,"</line>
<line start="2111" end="2125" speaker="strongbad">"Joshoakland"</line>
<line start="2126" end="2149" speaker="strongbad">Well, let's just see here...</line>
<line start="2150" end="2173" speaker="strongbad">Zero capitalization...</line>
<line start="2176" end="2186" speaker="strongbad">Misspelling...</line>
<line start="2192" end="2211" speaker="strongbad">Lack of punctuation...</line>
<line start="2217" end="2240" speaker="strongbad">Looks like a winner to me!</line>
<line start="2245" end="2282" speaker="strongbad">Dearest Josho, I have some good news for you!</line>
<line start="2284" end="2323" speaker="strongbad">I DO remember the email that I deleted the hardest.</line>
<line start="2325" end="2355" speaker="strongbad">And I'm still remembering it right now!!!</line>
<line start="2361" end="2387" speaker="strongbad">Homestar! Little help please.</line>
<line start="2390" end="2420" speaker="homestar">I'm way ahead of ya, SB.</line>
<line start="2424" end="2470" speaker="strongbad">Then, we'll just add some of the King of Town's fizzy denture tablets.</line>
<line start="2471" end="2500" speaker="kingoftown" voiceover="voiceover">Thems is my after-dinner mints!</line>
<line start="2514" end="2576" speaker="strongbad" volume="1.2">And now if you'd please turn in your hymnals, and join me in singing number 119,</line>
<line start="2577" end="2592" speaker="strongbad" volume="1.2">a-deleted.</line>
<line start="2595" end="2639">
<strongbad voiceover="voiceover">Deleted!</strongbad>
<homestar voiceover="voiceover">Deleted!</homestar>
<line start="2645" end="2671">
<line start="2671" end="2755" speaker="strongbad">Goodbye, old girl. They'll always say you went out in a blaze of green rectangular glory.</line>
<line start="2758" end="2790" speaker="strongbad">Alright. One down, one to go.</line>
<line start="2791" end="2830" speaker="sfx">suspenseful music plays</line>
<line start="2830" end="2846" speaker="sfx">Preeeeeow!</line>
Personal tools