Subtitles:sbemail157/en

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Current revision as of 04:53, 14 July 2007

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These are the English subtitles for trading cards. watch this toon To watch the toon with subtitles, we recommend that you install either the All-In-One Greasemonkey script for Firefox or the Homestar All-In-One extension for Chrome. It will give you the option to automatically display subtitles when you view toons on homestarrunner.com and those mirrored locally. Alternatively, you may use our local viewer.

<?xml version="1.0" encoding="utf-8" ?>
  <transcript xml:lang="en-us" file="sbemail157.swf" width="550" height="400">
    <line start="18" end="55" speaker="strongbad"><em>(singing) A-when you dribble down the court with an email,</em></line>
    <line start="56" end="95" speaker="strongbad"><em>you leave your dreams at the top of the keeeey.</em></line>
    <line start="99" end="132" speaker="strongbad">"Hey, Strong Bad. You should have trading cards."</line>
    <line start="138" end="157" speaker="strongbad">"With a stick of gum in them."</line>
    <line start="158" end="204" speaker="strongbad">"Nerdly yours, another freakin' guy named Daniel."</line>
    <line start="205" end="226" speaker="strongbad">"Not safe in Canada."</line>
    <line start="229" end="253" speaker="strongbad" volume=".8">Oh! Thanks for the tip, Daniel.</line>
    <line start="254" end="303" speaker="strongbad" volume=".8">I'll lay low here in the states for a while until things cool off.</line>
    <line start="309" end="370" speaker="strongbad">Daniel, trading cards are the biggest waste of not a video game on the planet!</line>
    <line start="371" end="437" speaker="strongbad">In fact, I thought trading cards were outlawed the day they invented good graphics.</line>
    <line start="440" end="484" speaker="strongbad">As for that "gum" that comes with them, I'm pretty sure they replaced that</line>
    <line start="485" end="543" speaker="strongbad">with a pink piece of balsa wood back in the early '80s and nobody ever noticed.</line>
    <line start="546" end="585" speaker="strongbad">So, no, I shouldn't have trading cards.</line>
    <line start="588" end="643" speaker="strongbad">But most of the other idiots round here have engaged in some form of trading cardery.</line>
    <line start="644" end="666" speaker="strongbad">Let's rag on them, shall we?</line>
    <line start="675" end="736" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">First up is Coach Z's line of vaguely sportsish managerial cards.</line>
    <line start="737" end="822" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">What self-respecting twelve-year-old doesn't want to collect pictures of the smelly old men behind their favorite sports teams?</line>
    <line start="823" end="873" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">And who could resist memorizing all these fabulous stats?</line>
    <line start="874" end="918" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">Ooh, a record high twenty-three butt pats in '84.</line>
    <line start="919" end="981" speaker="homestar">And who do you think what the lucky recipient of all those butt pats 'cept a one?</line>
    <line start="982" end="996" speaker="strongbad">Let me guess, it--</line>
    <line start="997" end="1041" speaker="homestar">No, it was me! It was like I was made to hustle that season.</line>
    <line start="1042" end="1065" speaker="strongbad">So, who got that last butt pat?</line>
    <line start="1066" end="1129" speaker="homestar">Oh. I think he gave himself that one. He's re-known for his self-butt pats.</line>
    <line start="1130" end="1164" speaker="strongbad">Yeah, known in seven states.</line>
    <line start="1165" end="1172" speaker="homestar" voiceover="voiceover">What?</line>
    <line start="1178" end="1211" speaker="strongbad">Next up, we got The Cheat's trading card game,</line>
    <line start="1212" end="1280" speaker="strongbad">which is really more like a trading card activity or trading card goings-on,</line>
    <line start="1281" end="1314" speaker="strongbad">because the word "game" implies fun and enjoyment.</line>
    <line start="1315" end="1339" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">And you won't find none of that here.</line>
    <line start="1356" end="1390" speaker="stinkoman">CHEATBALL POISON RAIN VORNADO!!!</line>
    <line start="1401" end="1411" speaker="cheatball">Cheatball!</line>
    <line start="1412" end="1426" speaker="sfx">poof!</line>
    <line start="1435" end="1444" speaker="sfx">music plays</line>
    <line start="1445" end="1505">
      <sfx>music plays</sfx>
      <stinkoman>Um, so, did I win? Does anyone know how this game works?</stinkoman>
    </line>
    <line start="1520" end="1587" speaker="homestar" voiceover="voiceover">I'll trade you your Cheatball card for my Deathly Pallor Lonely Lurker Attack card.</line>
    <line start="1588" end="1646" speaker="strongbad">Homestar, those aren't even from the same lame game. Or SLG.</line>
    <line start="1647" end="1701" speaker="strongbad">Your game is for musky nerds to play in the basement of the freshman dorms.</line>
    <line start="1702" end="1750" speaker="strongbad">This cutesy Japanesey game is for little kids to play during recess,</line>
    <line start="1751" end="1782" speaker="strongbad">to make sure they don't get any real exercise.</line>
    <line start="1783" end="1826" speaker="homestar">Well how are them kids gonna earn any butt pats if they don't hustle it out?</line>
    <line start="1827" end="1888" speaker="strongbad">I don't think butt pats are part of the approved curriculum in elementary schools these days.</line>
    <line start="1889" end="1919" speaker="homestar">Well, that's just sad.</line>
    <line start="1926" end="1997" speaker="strongbad">The only trading cards I really gave a toot about were the Poopsmith's line of gross-out cards for kids.</line>
    <line start="2003" end="2057" speaker="homestar" voiceover="voiceover">I'll trade you that Petey POOPsmith for this Marzi-PANCAKE.</line>
    <line start="2059" end="2080" speaker="strongbad">You just keep showing up, don't ya?</line>
    <line start="2081" end="2138" speaker="homestar">Okay, okay, I'll throw in this rare STING of Town, too.</line>
    <line start="2139" end="2183" speaker="strongbad">How 'bout I trade you a "get outta my face" for this...</line>
    <line start="2184" end="2205" speaker="strongbad">uhh...</line>
    <line start="2206" end="2255" speaker="strongbad">...one of a kind Strong Bad Bench Pressing Dinosaurs collector's card?</line>
    <line start="2256" end="2269" speaker="homestar" voiceover="voiceover">Hooo-ray!</line>
    <line start="2270" end="2291" speaker="homestar">My collection is complete!</line>
    <line start="2294" end="2339" speaker="homestar">And <em>here,</em> my good man, is your "get outta your face".</line>
    <line start="2374" end="2387" speaker="thepaper">preeeeow</line>
    <line start="2434" end="2470" speaker="strongbad">How many times have we had that conversation?</line>
    <line start="2471" end="2487" speaker="homestar">Thirty-five!</line>
  </transcript>