Strong Bad's Ladies

From Homestar Runner Wiki

Revision as of 04:40, 31 December 2019

"Ladies" redirects here. For Pom Pom's ladies, see Pom Pom's girls.

Ali from "sisters", one of Strong Bad's "ladies".

Over and over again, Strong Bad claims to be popular with the ladies. However, little evidence of this is actually seen, and it would appear he's simply making it up.

Appearances

Strong Bad Emails

• Email making out — Strong Bad calls himself "the master of make-out rock", but his best romantic song is titled "You're Really Ugly (But There's Nobody Cute Around)".
• Email i she be — Strong Bad says that he gets a large number of love letters daily from women with proper grammar.
• Email studying — Strong Bad says he's going to go to the emailer (Roy)'s girlfriend's house, but then realizes that he doesn't know where Roy's girlfriend lives. So, for good measure, he adds that "she still loves [Strong Bad]".
• Email super powers — Strong Bad claims that his "powers" are a huge hit with the ladies.
• Email sugarbob — Strong Bad, at the emailer (Daniel)'s request, tells Daniel's girlfriend that he is taken by women way hotter than her. He also types in alternate colors and fonts to make it seem as though women are typing.
• Email sisters — Strong Bad's luck finally seems to take a turn when Ali and her sister seem to have taken an interest in him, but his broken Tandy promptly deletes all trace of their email, so he never gets a chance to reply.
• Email lures & jigs — Strong Bad actually admits to not knowing much about women in a moment of weakness.
• Email theme party — Strong Bad doesn't want to go to a frat party, until he realizes that skinny blonde girls might be there.
• Email current status — Strong Bad insists that the ladies "all still want [him]", and that he's a "chick magnet", a "babe conductor", and a "logarithm for the ladies".
• Email marzipan — Strong Bad insists that Marzipan is in love with him, despite her insistence that she really doesn't like him at all.
• Email autobiography — In his very likely made-up autobiography, Strong Bad meets a girl with "skinny blonde hair" that falls in love with him and then has to go to another planet for "reasons too complex to elaborate on." Strong Bad insists that that was a true part.
• Email caper (Easter egg) — One of the objectives listed in Strong Bad's caper plan is "Say 'hi' to any ladies encountered."
• Email 2 emails — Strong Bad throws a party called the "2003 Ladies' Choice Awards", where "around 70 or 50 fine women" will allegedly vote to see who will dance with him. No women show up.
• Email suntan — Strong Bad says that "one thing the ladies love more than a regular Strong Bad is a lightly toasted Strong Bad", but when his one-sided suntan fails to accentuate any abs, he draws them in with a marker he calls the Ab-Abber 2000. Strong Sad says that this does not help him become popular with the ladies.
• Email couch patch — Li'l Strong Bad thinks that Carl Lewis is a hot girl named Carla.
• Email video games — Strong Bad claims that his image in StrongBadZone will make women want to make out with the screen.
• Email time capsule — Strong Bad thinks his time capsule will cause people of the future to send royalties and groupies back in time to him. They never show.
• Email extra plug — After envisioning himself as the balding guy on the cover of the box for the 'Lectric Boots, Strong Bad envisions the "hot girl" on the box as The Cheat for a moment before catching himself. No hot women arrive when he wears the boots.
• Email different town — Strong Bad imagines Homsar as a modestly hot girl.
• Email lunch special — Strong Bad starts to hit on a bad drawing of a Brontosaurus before realizing what he's doing.
• Email replacement — Strong Bad imagines his epitaph reading "buried with his hundred girlfriends".
• Email montage — Strong Bad imagines a montage of himself falling in love with a Wagon Fulla Pancakes.
• Email animal — Strong Bad imagines himself as a "Deep Sea Fanglyfish" with a deck for dinner and dancing... but abandons that idea when he realizes that he can't dance with the women on the deck if he's the fanglyfish.
• Email dreamail — Strong Bad's dream email is written from "128 Hot Katies", but even in his dream-world, Homestar is still more popular with the ladies.
• Email rock opera — The lyrics include "Famous ladies always like SBEmail".
• Email do over — Strong Bad imagines how he'd do the Ali and Ali's sister email over, but he can't think of what he'd do at Ali's house. He then tries to serenade them with a terrible song (at Homestar Runner's suggestion) but then finds himself imagining that Homestar falls in love with him.
• Email space program — Strong Bad imagines hot 60s-looking girls arriving when he "blasts off" in his cardboard space ship, but the closest he gets is The King of Town, who is in his 60s.
• Email lady...ing — Strong Bad's early incarnation has nothing but bad advice to give for wooing women.
• Email Family Resemblence — Strong Bad thinks that Stella Do, Pom Pom's hypothetical sister (who looks like a pair of headphones with arms, legs, and a floaty face) looks hot. He abandons her when he realizes that she's only hypothetical, and that the hypothetical make-out session is "not gonna cut it." In an Easter egg, he speaks as though it would be romantic to plug her into his record player.
• Email portrait — Strong Bad attempts to hit on a wooden cutout of a mermaid, with Lord Quackingstick as its head.
• Email lady fan — Strong Bad imagines the writer's "lady fan" would fall for himself if he were to impress her.
• Email candy product — Strong Bad agrees with the emailer that he's a "chick-magnet".
• Email alternate universe — Stinkoman sings "I hope it's from a girl", referring to the "last" email.
• Email senior prom — Strong Bad insists that he received a message from one "Delilelia" on his "answering machine" saying she can't make it, hence his need to crash the prom.
• Email coloring — Strong Bad replaces a drawing of Larry Palaroncini serenading an "of-age lady" with himself.
• Email what I want — One of the things Strong Bad wants for Decemberween is a "hot stepsister".
• Email strong badathlon — Strong Bad claims his best event is "Probably Something with Guitars, lasers, Robots, and Hot Girls". Unlike all the other events, no characters are actually seen participating in this event outside of a Powered by The Cheat segment.
• Email your funeral — Strong Bad claims that his body will be taxidermied and "kept in a place of honor for all the world to want to make out with", but the scene resulting from this situation only shows him being used as a coat rack in Marzipan's house. He also considers preserving himself with "the salty tears of all the heartbroken private school girls that will [pine] for [him]."
• Email hygiene — Strong Bad complains about receiving an email from a fifth-grade boy, and wonders what happened to the hot college girls that used to email him.
• Email bike thief — Strong Bad claims that asking people to sign fake petitions has allowed him to steal people's girlfriends.
• Email pizza joint — Strong Bad tries to open a pizza joint in order to get emailer Daphne to show up. Instead, he gets Homestar and the King of Town. He then opens an official website for The Pizz, hoping to chat with college girls. Again, all he gets are Homestar and the King of Town. Ironically, in the same email the Cheat manages to turn the King of Town's grill into a rival business and actually manages to get several girls to come.
• Email nightlife — Strong Bad claims he's doing his "matin' dance" when Homestar sleep-talks to him in Club Technochocolate.
• Email love poems — Strong Bad calls himself the "Rub Doctor" (said as though the first word is "love") and gives advice on wooing women. Homestar interrupts to say that "it's funny when [Strong Bad] tr[ies] to play grown-up" and that he is "the only character with any no-arms-on experience with the ladies."
• Email magic trick — Strong Bad says he'll have to marry Agnes, the girl who wrote the email, and later directly refers to her as his wife.

In email songs

• Email little questions — "All the ladies want to know, who's checkin' that email? Was it Strong Bad?"
• Email 50 emails — "Oh, girl... I want to email you so nice."
• Email dragon — "Here I go once again with the email! Every week I hope that it's from a female!"
• Email the show — "Email, women, email, girls! Email, women, email, girls!"
• Email suntan — "I met her in the summertime. Her name was...{clear voice} email."
• Email flashback — "One, two, three, four! Email is awesome! Email is weird! Email is awesome, and email is weird! And I'll never forget the way it was, grrrl!"
• Email part-time job — "A lot of ladies and a lot of girls... some healthy ladies and some healthy girls!"
• Email long pants — "And if I email you, girl! Woman! Oh, would you email me, girl? Woman?"
• Email space program — "Email is the sound that we make when a young girl cries..."

Other Appearances

• Strong Bad's Character Video — Ladies are instructed to form a line for make outs.
• The King of Town DVD — In the commentary, Strong Bad introduces himself as "America's number one son and sweetheart to all the ladies".
• Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 6.0 — Strong Bad asks Marzipan what present to get for his girlfriend. He overly and continually asserts that this girlfriend is real and not made up.
• Scroll Button Song in early 2004 — "I keep my buttons on scroll and all the ladies in check, did you find the spare key to my apartment yet? Wha'."
• Strong Bad is in Jail Cartoon — Strong Bad encourages "sweet lady freedom" to make out with him, and gets angry when The Cheat apparently repeats what he says.
• TrogdorCon '97 — Strong Bad is incredulous that "ladies in skimpy sci-fi costumes" attend the comic book convention with geeks and nerds, and says the ladies should be hanging out with him, "and to a lesser degree, football players and rappers".
• Teen Girl Squad Issue 10 — Strong Bad is caught "first basin' it with that piece of loose leaf" upon which he has drawn The Ugly One looking very makey-outy at her sweet someteenth birthday party.
• Halloween Awards Show — Similar to in autobiography, Strong Bad claims that his hot girlfriend was recently sucked into a wormhole.
• SBCG4AP Dev Blog — Strong Bad edits several pictures from Strong Bad's Cool Game for Attractive People. In one picture, he draws a woman in a bikini and claims he "attracts high class bikini ladies (or maybe Kate Pierson from the B-52's)".
• Strong Badia the Free — While pretending to be disappointed in the King of Town's victory, Strong Bad says he's going home to play video games with "pajamaed-up co-eds".
• Quote of the Week — The October 16, 2008 quote (an outtake from email thunder) has Strong Bad cheering about the fact that he apparently got an email inviting him to a dorm to hang out and have pillow fights with a bunch of college-age girls, until he notices that the email was actually addressed to Homestar.
• 8-Bit Is Enough — Strong Bad says he doesn't want Homestar interrupting all his scheduled make-out sessions. Homestar points out that he has access to Strong Bad's calendar, and that Strong Bad doesn't have any make-out sessions scheduled.
• Behind The Bad Chapter 3: The Last Straw — Strong Bad is labeled as a "Girlfriend Have-er".
• 79 Seconds Left — Strong Sad refers to Strong Bad as an "alleged ladies' man."
• Poker Night at the Inventory — When Tycho Brahe asks Strong Bad what he would do if he ever got a lady, Strong Bad becomes very upset, and says he "had to cancel, like, five dates with nine supermodels" just to be there, and that their bras just fly off when they enter his "natural musk fog".

See Also

• Allegedly Real Things
• Blatant Lies
• Making Out
• Cheerleader's Boys
• Pom Pom's Girls