King Castlefunny Pencil Moistener
From Homestar Runner Wiki
King Castlefunny Pencil Moistener is an item that moistens pencils. The failed comic strip Castlefunnies tried to creep back into the mainstream with this tool. It was created for the Dry Pencil Scare of '47. According to the quote on the box, President Truman believed that everyone was going to need one. However, this scare only lasted three days. They didn't sell too many.