Homestarmy

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Homestarmy
Homestarmy
The Few, The Proud, The Homestarmy!
Active ca. January 5, 2004—Present
Allegiance Free Country, USA
Headquarters The Stick
Motto Do You Has?
Membership Cost $5
Members
Duties
Equipment
Major Battles
Enemies

The Homestarmy (a portmanteau of "Homestar" and "army") is a "no-armed fighting force" led by Colonel Homestar Runner (pronounced "col-o-nel" by Homestar, as opposed to its normal pronunciation "ker-nel"). The Homestarmy was initially founded to invade and conquer Strong Badia as a means for Homestar to take revenge on Strong Bad's increasing popularity, encouraging "draft dodgers" to "serve their country". After invading Strong Badia, the Homestarmy plans to "paint that fence some other cool color and put a fake beard on that tire".

Homestar attempts to recruit "the most elite team of crack commandos", claiming that members should have guts, determination, and a deposit of five dollars. He also encourages recruits to bring him a sack lunch and some orange slices. But in reality, the Homestarmy is a rag-tag group of Free Country, USA's more disenfranchised citizens united by Homestar's friendly influence and their shared dislike of Strong Bad. Regardless, Homestar is very confident in this meager army and often tries to get the said five dollars from his soldiers. The army is known to surrender easily, as Homestar orders his soldiers to retreat and says they're "in over their heads" when Strong Bad simply calls off the invasion to play badminton.

It appears that orange Tupperware bowls are the Homestarmy uniform, as all members except Frank Bennedetto wear one as a helmet. Homestar sometimes advertises the army as wearing "cool camos", but they have never been seen wearing any. Other than the Painting of a Guy with a Big Knife's big knife and Homestar's wooden spoon, they carry no weapons, though Homestar claims that any who oppose them will feel their "fluoride sting".

History

"Don't you die on me!"

Their enthusiastic invasion of Strong Badia in January 2004 resulted in the awkward military fiasco known as The Battle of Strong Badia. The only casualty was Third-Style Private Bennedetto, a popcorn air-popper, wounded by a kick from Strong Bad. There are conflicting accounts on his death, and it is left ambiguous as to whether he really died.

In September 2004, Frank Bennedetto (alive and well in puppet-form) and Colonel Homestar returned to their duties in an effort to ensure that "nobody or their brother does any type of work at all" on Labor Day, with each person who works apparently owing Homestar five bucks.

Homestar tried to recruit new members for the Homestarmy at the Vaguely Military Career Fair, saying that he was looking for people that came from "a long line of five bucks-havers".

Later, the Homestarmy banded together again to overthrow the oppressive The Of Town and prevent an invasion, with new members Strong Bad (their former rival), The Cheat, Pom Pom, Strong Mad, and Coach Z. The final member, Coach Z, was drafted in using a "Peace Draft" wheel in Marzipan's backyard. The Painting of a Guy with a Big Knife was absent, as he does not appear in this game. The Invasion of the King of Town's castle ended up lasting five minutes. After that, everyone quit except for Strong Mad, Strong Sad, and Homestar. The Cheat, Coach Z, and Homsar defected to the Municipality.

Members

Battle of Strong Badia

Invasion of the King of Town's Castle

Appearances

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