Crystal Fortress

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"Unicorns?! Who-who are you?"

In this partially-Powered by The Cheat music video, Davey attempts to call Strong Bad from his crystal fortress - but the Rambling Wreck of E-Mail Check has got some countermeasures!

Cast (in order of appearance): Davey, Other Guy/Guitarist, Strong Bad, Unicorn, Multi-ethnic kids

Date: Monday, September 28, 2009

Running Time: 2:09

Page Title: Davey Gets His Due!

Contents

Transcript

DAVEY: Mmm. French fries.
OTHER GUY: Mmm. Yeah, they're good. Gee, Davey, Strong Bad always seems so hostile. I bet he doesn't even know how much everybody loves him.
DAVEY: Nope, nope. I don't think so either.
OTHER GUY: Nope.
DAVEY: I've written a song I think'll make Strong Bad understand.
OTHER GUY: Oh?
DAVEY: I'm gonna sing it.

DAVEY: Uhh Huh
STRONG BAD: {spoken} I already don't like the sound of this one. Ohh, vomit-inducing! My favorite!
DAVEY: {singing throughout} Come down from your crystal fortress, oh Strong Bad,
STRONG BAD: What?
DAVEY: A unicorn awaits at a rainbow bridge,
STRONG BAD: Unicorns?! Wh-who are you?
DAVEY: Her head is bowed and a tiny tear traces these words in the dew.
STRONG BAD: All right, you whiny weasels.

DAVEY: Please come down from your crystal fortress
OTHER GUY: {singing back up vocals throughout} Strong Bad
DAVEY: Please come down from your crystal fortress,
STRONG BAD: {singing} Shut up.
OTHER GUY: {simultaneously} Strong Bad
DAVEY: Please come down from your crystal fortress.

STRONG BAD: {screamed} Throw me a squeedley guitar!
STRONG BAD: Let me tell ya,
STRONG BAD: You get French fries, and you get French fries, but you don't get French fries,
STRONG BAD: That's right! You get French fries, and you get French fries, but you don't get no French fries,
OTHER SINGER: {simultaneously, heavy metal style screaming} You don't get french friiies. You get french friiiiies! They Might be Giiiants, gets no french friiies! Yeeah-ah yeah-ah yeah ah!
STRONG BAD: You get the French fries, and you get the French fries, but you don't get French fries!
STRONG BAD: Ohh!
STRONG BAD: Ahh!

DAVEY: Unchain your trembling hopes and dreams, oh Strong Bad,
STRONG BAD: Awwwwwwww! I thought you were done.
DAVEY: The love you deny is the key that will melt the lock,
STRONG BAD: I'll melt your face!
DAVEY: Our golden shining spirits,
STRONG BAD: Eww!
DAVEY: will all join hands and sing.

DAVEY: Please come down from your crystal fortress
OTHER GUY: Strong Bad
STRONG BAD: No.
DAVEY: Please come down from your crystal fortress
OTHER GUY: Strong Bad
STRONG BAD: I'm not coming down from no place.
DAVEY: Please come down from your crystal fortress.
OTHER GUY: Strong Bad.
DAVEY: Strong Bad.
STRONG BAD: Shut up... you stupid hippie.

STRONG BAD: {spoken} I'm-a gonna throw a brick at your cellist.

{A crash is heard, with the sound of a piano being broken}

Fun Facts

Explanations

Remarks

  • Although Strong Bad says he's "gonna throw a brick at [their] cellist", the instrument that we hear breaking is a piano.

Goofs

  • The girl is the only one of the Haddi-Man kids that does not have a shadow.

Inside References

  • French fries are commonly seen and mentioned throughout the music video.
  • At the end of the email virus Strong Bad says that he doesn't even remembers Davey's name.
  • The guitarist first appeared in for kids, as did the three children.
  • Strong Bad mentions vomit inducing.
  • Strong Bad's comments throughout the song are reminiscent of those in Sensitive to Bees. In both songs, he responds to the first sung line with "What?".
  • Strong Bad says he'll melt the guitarist's face off, something he attempted to do in coloring to Limozeen with his crayons.
  • When Strong Bad is seen on the mountaintop, he is depicted as being really muscular.
  • The pixellated lightning bolts at the beginning of Strong Bad's metal segment are directly imported from the Peasant's Quest title screen.
  • Strong Bad stylized as a "haddiman" kid has ears.
  • Strong Bad threatens to throw a brick, something he also did in Sketchbook (video) and the process.
  • At the beginning of Strong Bad's metal segment, the picture shown in the background is the Unicorn in Paradise poster (sans unicorn), which was also seen in his bedroom.

Real-World References

  • Davey's costume before Strong Bad appears on the mountaintop is based on that of Brunnhilde from Wagner's "Ring" cycle. It is considered an iconic and stereotypical operatic costume.
  • The scene with Strong Bad on the mountaintop spoofs the "Night On Bald Mountain" sequence of the Disney movie, Fantasia, with Strong Bad as Chernabog.
    • It may also be a reference to the introduction of Quest for Glory II: Trial By Fire, since the "Sierra Presents" logo also has a purple colored djinni appearing out from behind a mountain.

See Also

External Links

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