Coach Z

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{{charnav|Coach Z|cz|Marzipan|Bubs}}
{{charnav|Coach Z|cz|Marzipan|Bubs}}
-
[[Image:coach-z.png|thumb|right|200px|More than two problems]]
+
[[Image:New_Coach_Z_Styles.PNG|thumb|right|200px|He has more than two problems.]]
{{about|main character}} {{for|[[Teen Girl Squad]] character|Olympic Man and Coach}}  
{{about|main character}} {{for|[[Teen Girl Squad]] character|Olympic Man and Coach}}  
==Biography==
==Biography==
-
'''Coach Z''' is the "[[Wikipedia:Coach (sport)|coach]]" of the residents of [[Free Country, USA]], though it is unclear exactly which sports he coaches. He has a strong accent, based on an [[Wikipedia:Upper Midwest|Upper Midwestern]] [[Wikipedia:North Central American English|accent]] (though it is also sometimes simply nonsensical) which is sometimes difficult for other characters to understand. While occasionally tiresome, he is always ready to offer encouragement and is rarely critical of anyone.  When giving advice, he tends to start with the phrase "You can't just rush into the score zone", which has lost its meaning through time.   
+
'''Coach Z''' is the "[[Wikipedia:Coach (sport)|coach]]" of the residents of [[Free Country, USA]], though it is unclear exactly which sports he coaches. He has a strong accent, based on an [[Wikipedia:Upper Midwest|Upper Midwestern]] [[Wikipedia:North Central American English|accent]] (though it is also sometimes simply nonsensical) which is sometimes difficult for other characters to understand. While occasionally tiresome, he is always ready to offer encouragement and is rarely critical of anyone.  When giving advice, he tends to start with the phrase "You can't just rush into the score zone", which has lost its meaning through time.   
-
Coach Z wears a blue and purple baseball cap and a large gold Z emblem around his waist. Nobody knows for sure whether his bright green color is his skin or a body suit. However, [[Middle School Variation#Baby Coach Z|baby Coach Z]] seems to be wearing footy pajamas in the email [[highschool]], and on more than one occasion, Coach Z has mentioned his [[pants]]. In [[shapeshifter]], Coach Z referred to his outfit as his "sweaty sweat-sweats", which was seen to have at least one pocket.  His head is a white sphere with light gray circles for eyes.   Coach Z [[Lack of Visible Body Parts#Coach Z's Face|lacks a visible nose and mouth]], but is able to talk, eat and spit with ease. He has long arms and large feet, but very short legs.
+
Coach Z wears a blue and purple baseball cap and a large gold Z emblem around his waist. Nobody knows for sure whether his bright green color is his skin or a body suit. However, [[Middle School Variation#Baby Coach Z|baby Coach Z]] seems to be wearing footy pajamas in the email [[highschool]], and on more than one occasion, Coach Z has mentioned his [[pants]]. In [[shapeshifter]], Coach Z referred to his outfit as his "sweaty sweat-sweats", which was seen to have at least one pocket, and in [[Fan Costumes 2017]] he is implied to have undressed.  His head is a white sphere with light gray circles for eyes. Coach Z [[Lack of Visible Body Parts#Coach Z's Face|lacks a visible nose and mouth]], but is able to talk, eat, and spit with ease. He has long arms and large feet, but very short legs.
[[Image:Coach z butt.PNG|thumb|An unshaven Coach Z talking about his butt.]]
[[Image:Coach z butt.PNG|thumb|An unshaven Coach Z talking about his butt.]]
-
As Coach Z himself is not afraid to admit, he's got [[Who Said What Now?|more than two problems]]. Despite being a coach, he doesn't know what a basketball is, as indicated in [[secret recipes]]. It has been strongly implied that he has a crush on [[Marzipan]], and he has occasionally made inappropriate comments about her; [[Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 5.0#Message 6|one occasion]] [[Marzipan's Answering Machine|on her answering machine]] when he was drunk, and another during the commercial break of the 4Tst annual [[Fall Float Parade]]. In [[diorama]], Coach Z even refers to Marzipan as his "gorgeous girlfriend". He also has difficulty pronouncing certain words, such as "job" (as shown in the "[[A Jorb Well Done]]" cartoon), instead pronouncing it as "jorb", "jaerb", or "jorearb".  In addition to his frequent mispronunciations, Coach Z also seems to have mental and gender confusion problems, as evidenced by the time he spent "talking to his parents" on a [[disconnected telephone]], and claiming to be a mother in [[garage sale]]. He has even stated on [[Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 8.0|one occasion]] that he sometimes "forgets what's real, and what's just in [his] head".  He has an apparent fixation with butts, and he seems to have a habit of [[butt-patting]]. Many characters see him as a nuisance. Even Homestar treated Coach Z with contempt in [[Decemberween Short Shorts]], quickly refusing to allow Coach Z to come to his house for [[Decemberween]].
+
As Coach Z himself is not afraid to admit, he's got [[Who Said What Now?|more than two problems]]. Despite being a coach, he doesn't know what a basketball is, as indicated in [[secret recipes]]. It has been strongly implied that he has a crush on [[Marzipan]], and he has occasionally made inappropriate comments about her; [[Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 5.0#Message 6|one occasion]] [[Marzipan's Answering Machine|on her answering machine]] when he was drunk, and another during the commercial break of the 4Tst annual [[Fall Float Parade]]. In [[diorama]], Coach Z even refers to Marzipan as his "gorgeous girlfriend". He also has difficulty pronouncing certain words, such as "job" (as shown in the "[[A Jorb Well Done]]" cartoon), instead pronouncing it as "jorb", "jaerb", or "jorearb".  In addition to his frequent mispronunciations, Coach Z also seems to have mental and gender confusion problems, as evidenced by the time he spent "talking to his parents" on a [[disconnected telephone]], and claiming to be a mother in [[garage sale]]. He has even stated on [[Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 8.0|one occasion]] that he sometimes "forgets what's real, and what's just in [his] head".  He has an apparent fixation with butts, and he seems to have a habit of [[butt-patting]]. He also has a slight obsession with ointments and body creams, like using 'Blue Star Ointment' to scare people in [[Halloween Fairstival]].  Many characters see him as a nuisance. Even Homestar treated Coach Z with contempt in [[Decemberween Short Shorts]], quickly refusing to allow Coach Z to come to his house for [[Decemberween]].
When not working as a coach, Coach Z works with [[Homestar Runner]] and [[Bubs]] as the apparent [[Strong Bad is in Jail Cartoon|local law enforcement]] in [[Free Country, USA]].  Coach Z is also the janitor at [[the office]] where Homestar and [[Strong Bad]] work.  He is paid on hourly wage and is clearly jealous that Strong Bad is paid on salary. He has also spent time [[Blubb-O's Commercial|dressed as the Blubb-O's Drive-Thru Whale]] mascot. Coach Z owns four [[Wikipedia:Tony Award|Tony awards]], suggesting that he may have a background in theatre. Despite his numerous jobs, Coach Z has trouble managing his money, causing his electricity to be shut off each year.
When not working as a coach, Coach Z works with [[Homestar Runner]] and [[Bubs]] as the apparent [[Strong Bad is in Jail Cartoon|local law enforcement]] in [[Free Country, USA]].  Coach Z is also the janitor at [[the office]] where Homestar and [[Strong Bad]] work.  He is paid on hourly wage and is clearly jealous that Strong Bad is paid on salary. He has also spent time [[Blubb-O's Commercial|dressed as the Blubb-O's Drive-Thru Whale]] mascot. Coach Z owns four [[Wikipedia:Tony Award|Tony awards]], suggesting that he may have a background in theatre. Despite his numerous jobs, Coach Z has trouble managing his money, causing his electricity to be shut off each year.
[[Image:Babycz.PNG|thumb|left|115px|The craptain of the foortball torm!]]
[[Image:Babycz.PNG|thumb|left|115px|The craptain of the foortball torm!]]
-
Coach Z is a fan of hip-hop and rap music, particularly the [[Wikipedia:Wu-Tang Clan|Wu-Tang Clan]].  He fancies himself a rapper as well: He released the single "[[These Peoples Try to Fade Me]]," which appeared on [[Strong Bad Sings and Other Type Hits]], his solo album, entitled "The Z Is All Up Ins", features the smash hit "[[New Boots|Hip Hop Dance]]", and his own rap song, "[[Rap Song]]" (featuring [[Peacey P]] and [[Tenerence Love]]).  Although his usual rapping prowess consists mainly of "count[ing] to two over and over again," as explained in [[nightlife]], he once had a very successful career during his days in the [[Two-o Duo]].
+
Coach Z is a fan of hip-hop and rap music, particularly the [[Wikipedia:Wu-Tang Clan|Wu-Tang Clan]].  He fancies himself a rapper as well: He released the single "[[These Peoples Try to Fade Me]]", which appeared on [[Strong Bad Sings and Other Type Hits]], his solo album, entitled "The Z Is All Up Ins", features the smash hit "[[New Boots|Hip Hop Dance]]", and his own rap song, "[[Rap Song]]" (featuring [[Peacey P]] and [[Tenerence Love]]).  Although his usual rapping prowess consists mainly of "count[ing] to two over and over again", as explained in [[nightlife]], he once had a very successful career during his days in the [[Two-o Duo]]. More recent works such as "[[Loading Screens]]" and "[[Fish Eye Lens]]" may indicate that his rap skills are starting to improve.
[[Image:CoachZ3D.png|thumb|"Hey, watch where y'er pointin' that 3D!"]]
[[Image:CoachZ3D.png|thumb|"Hey, watch where y'er pointin' that 3D!"]]
-
Coach Z's [[Ages of Characters|age]] is ambiguous, as he appears to be grown up when Strong Bad was a kid in the email [[stand-up]], while they both appeared to be babies in the email [[highschool]] (although this may simply be a product of Strong Bad's [[History According to Strong Bad|"doodle memory"]]). He is likely to be one of the older characters, since in [[caffiene]], Strong Sad's slaps provoke him to cry out "I'm just an old man!" and in [[slumber party]], Strong Bad refers to him, [[Bubs]], and [[The King of Town]] as "older kids."
+
Coach Z's [[Ages of Characters|age]] is ambiguous, as he appears to be grown up when Strong Bad was a kid in the email [[stand-up]] as well as appearing as an adult in 1974 in the 'toon [[Decemberween short shorts]] while they both appeared to be babies in the email [[highschool]] (although this may simply be a product of Strong Bad's [[History According to Strong Bad|"doodle memory"]]). He is likely to be one of the older characters, since in [[caffeine]], Strong Sad's slaps provoke him to cry out "I'm just an old man!"; in [[slumber party]], Strong Bad refers to him, [[Bubs]], and [[The King of Town]] as "older kids"; and while narrating an interaction between Coach Z and Bubs in [[narrator]], Strong Bad labels them both as "weird old men". 
Coach Z and [[Bubs]] [[Bubs and Coach Z's Relationship|had a falling out]] at one point, as [[Fall Float Parade]] shows us; Bubs makes a "Coach Z, you jerk!" float for the parade, and Coach Z retaliates by saying "Serves him right, then" when [[Strong Mad]] steals [[Bubs Concession Stand|his concession stand]]. In the email [[narrator]], it was shown that they had made-up and returned to having boring conversations about [[Bubs's napkins]]. However, in [[Most In The Graveyard]], when it is implied that Coach Z fancies Bubs' sister, Bubs beats him up. In the same toon, it is also revealed that Coach Z and Bubs may actually be very distant cousins, although Bubs finds this hard to believe.
Coach Z and [[Bubs]] [[Bubs and Coach Z's Relationship|had a falling out]] at one point, as [[Fall Float Parade]] shows us; Bubs makes a "Coach Z, you jerk!" float for the parade, and Coach Z retaliates by saying "Serves him right, then" when [[Strong Mad]] steals [[Bubs Concession Stand|his concession stand]]. In the email [[narrator]], it was shown that they had made-up and returned to having boring conversations about [[Bubs's napkins]]. However, in [[Most In The Graveyard]], when it is implied that Coach Z fancies Bubs' sister, Bubs beats him up. In the same toon, it is also revealed that Coach Z and Bubs may actually be very distant cousins, although Bubs finds this hard to believe.
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*'''Domicile:''' [[Coach Z's Locker Room]]
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*'''Domicile:''' [[Coach Z's Locker Room]]
*'''Debut:''' "[[Where My Hat Is At?]]"
*'''Debut:''' "[[Where My Hat Is At?]]"
*[[:Category:Coach Z Filmography|Complete Filmography]]
*[[:Category:Coach Z Filmography|Complete Filmography]]
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Image:oldcoach.PNG|Youthful days
Image:oldcoach.PNG|Youthful days
Image:Coach Z- no hat.PNG|Hatless
Image:Coach Z- no hat.PNG|Hatless
-
Image:ZsNewMedallion.png|His emblem, squished / skewed / turned all around (from [[redesign]])</gallery>
+
Image:ZsNewMedallion.png|His emblem, squished / skewed / turned all around (from [[redesign]])
-
 
+
Image:Czornament.PNG|"The 74s was the prime of my datin' year!"
 +
</gallery>
{{Character Video Transcript}}
{{Character Video Transcript}}
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===Sounds Affected===
===Sounds Affected===
-
The most commonly mispronounced sounds are long e (i.e. The Cheat) and the short o (job), which both come out as an "or" or "aer" ("The Chort", "jaerb").
+
The most commonly mispronounced sounds are long e (e.g. The Cheat) and the short o (job), which both come out as an "or" or "aer" ("The Chort", "jaerb"), although in a few toons such as [[3 Times Halloween Funjob]], he's shown to purposely do it.
===List of mispronounced words===
===List of mispronounced words===
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! Original Word<!-- Please add new words in alphabetical order! --> !! Coach Z's version(s) !! Appears In
! Original Word<!-- Please add new words in alphabetical order! --> !! Coach Z's version(s) !! Appears In
|-
|-
-
| '''Absolutely''' || Abso-prootley || [[Accent]]
+
| '''Absolutely''' || Abso-prootley, Absalortly || Email [[Accent]], [[I Killed Pom Pom]]
|-
|-
| '''About''' || Abrat/Abort || [[No Hands On Deck!]], [[Happy Hallow-day]], [[Loading Screens]], [[Doomy Tales of the Macabre]]
| '''About''' || Abrat/Abort || [[No Hands On Deck!]], [[Happy Hallow-day]], [[Loading Screens]], [[Doomy Tales of the Macabre]]
|-
|-
-
| '''Accent''' || Orccent/Accernt || [[Accent]]
+
| '''Accent''' || Orccent/Accernt || Email [[Accent]]
|-
|-
| '''Action''' || Airkshin || [[Happy Fireworks]], [[Main Page 23]]
| '''Action''' || Airkshin || [[Happy Fireworks]], [[Main Page 23]]
 +
|-
 +
| '''Apartment''' || Apratment || Email [[sbemail206]]
|-
|-
| '''Athlete''' || Airthlete || [[The Homestar Runner Gets Something Stuck in His Craw]]
| '''Athlete''' || Airthlete || [[The Homestar Runner Gets Something Stuck in His Craw]]
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| '''Awful''' || Orful || Email [[secret recipes]]
| '''Awful''' || Orful || Email [[secret recipes]]
|-
|-
-
| '''Balloon''' || b'lloon || [[Fall Float Parade]]
+
| '''Back''' || Bork || [[I Killed Pom Pom]]
 +
|-
 +
| '''Balloon''' || B'lloon || [[Fall Float Parade]]
 +
|-
 +
| '''Believe''' || Belorve || [[Haunted Photo Booth]]
 +
|-
 +
| '''Bomb''' || Baermb || [[The House That Gave Sucky Treats]], [[These peoples try to fade me]]
|-
|-
-
| '''Bomb''' || Baermb || [[The House That Gave Sucky Treats]],<br>[[These peoples try to fade me]]
+
| '''Boulevard''' || Borlevard || [[I Killed Pom Pom]]
|-
|-
| '''Captain''' || [[Media:Highschool 6.ogg|Craptain]] || Email [[highschool]]
| '''Captain''' || [[Media:Highschool 6.ogg|Craptain]] || Email [[highschool]]
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| '''Charge''' || Chiioooorge || [[Strong Badia the Free]]
| '''Charge''' || Chiioooorge || [[Strong Badia the Free]]
|-
|-
-
 
| '''Chips''' || Chorps || [[3 Times Halloween Funjob]]
| '''Chips''' || Chorps || [[3 Times Halloween Funjob]]
|-
|-
-
| '''[[Crap]]''' || Crop || [[Accent]]
+
| '''Chop''' || Chorp || [[Haunted Photo Booth]]
 +
|-
 +
| '''[[Crap]]''' || Crop || Email [[Accent]]
|-
|-
| '''Credenza''' || Cradernzair || [[3 Times Halloween Funjob]]
| '''Credenza''' || Cradernzair || [[3 Times Halloween Funjob]]
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| '''Crickets''' || Crackets || [[Happy Hallow-day]]
| '''Crickets''' || Crackets || [[Happy Hallow-day]]
|-
|-
-
| '''Cubicle''' || Kyorbicle || [[DNA Evidence (Toon)|DNA Evidence]]
+
| '''Cubicle''' || Kyorbicle || [[DNA Evidence]]
|-
|-
| '''[[Decemberween]]''' || Decemberwern || [[The Best Decemberween Ever]]
| '''[[Decemberween]]''' || Decemberwern || [[The Best Decemberween Ever]]
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|-
|-
| '''Disco''' || Disca ||  [[Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 9.2]]  
| '''Disco''' || Disca ||  [[Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 9.2]]  
 +
|-
 +
| '''Do it''' || Dort || [[Meeple Grove]]
|-
|-
| '''Drop''' || Drap || Email [[your funeral]]
| '''Drop''' || Drap || Email [[your funeral]]
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| '''[[Duck]]''' || Dook || [[Sbemail 169 Deleted Scene]]
| '''[[Duck]]''' || Dook || [[Sbemail 169 Deleted Scene]]
|-
|-
-
| '''Exaggerate''' || Exorggerate || [[Accent]]
+
| '''Exaggerate''' || Exorggerate || Email [[Accent]]
|-
|-
| '''Effigy''' || Orfigy, arfigy, RPG, first-person shooter || [[Strong Badia the Free]]
| '''Effigy''' || Orfigy, arfigy, RPG, first-person shooter || [[Strong Badia the Free]]
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|-
|-
| '''Field''' || Fierld || [[Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 1.0]], [[Coach Z's 110%]], Email [[dictionary]]
| '''Field''' || Fierld || [[Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 1.0]], [[Coach Z's 110%]], Email [[dictionary]]
 +
|-
 +
| '''Fittin'''' || Fortin' || [[I Killed Pom Pom]]
|-
|-
| '''Five''' || Farve || [[A Decemberween Pageant]]
| '''Five''' || Farve || [[A Decemberween Pageant]]
|-
|-
-
| '''Flapjacks''' || Florpjacks || [[Accent]]
+
| '''Flapjacks''' || Florpjacks || Email [[Accent]]
 +
|-
 +
| '''[[Fluffy Puff Marshmallows|Fluffy Puffs]]''' || Florfy Porfs || [[Later That Night...]]
|-
|-
| '''Football Team''' || Foortball Torm || Email [[highschool]]
| '''Football Team''' || Foortball Torm || Email [[highschool]]
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| '''Forward''' || Frorward || [[Doomy Tales of the Macabre]]
| '''Forward''' || Frorward || [[Doomy Tales of the Macabre]]
|-
|-
-
| '''Gosh''' || Gorsh || Email [[strong badathlon]], [[Dangeresque 3: The Criminal Projective]]
+
| '''Gosh''' || Gorsh || Email [[strong badathlon]], [[Dangeresque 3: The Criminal Projective]], [[Later That Night...]]
 +
|-
 +
| '''Globes''' || Glorbs || [[Later That Night...]]
|-
|-
| '''Gluten''' and '''Glutton''' || Glorten || [[Weclome Back]]
| '''Gluten''' and '''Glutton''' || Glorten || [[Weclome Back]]
|-
|-
-
| '''Halloween''' || Halloworn || [[The Best Decemberween Ever]]
+
| '''Half''' || Ha'''l'''f (non-silent L) || [[Mr. Poofers Must Die]]
 +
|-
 +
| '''Halloween''' || Halloworn, Hallerwern  || [[The Best Decemberween Ever]], [[Jibblies 2]]
|-
|-
-
| '''Halloween''' || Hallerwern || [[Jibblies 2]]
+
| '''Handlebar''' || Handlebrah || [[Haunted Photo Booth]]
|-
|-
| '''Happy Hallow&mdash;''' || Horpy Horlow&mdash; || [[Happy Hallow-day]]
| '''Happy Hallow&mdash;''' || Horpy Horlow&mdash; || [[Happy Hallow-day]]
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| '''Hello''' || Hellor || [[Homestar Presents: Presents]]
| '''Hello''' || Hellor || [[Homestar Presents: Presents]]
|-
|-
-
| '''[[Homestar Runner|Homestar]]''' || Hamstray, Hamster, Stramstar,<br>[http://www.stairmaster.com Stairmaster], Homegrown, [[Wikipedia:Ramrod|Ramrod]], Humphel || [[A Jorb Well Done]]
+
| '''[[Homestar Runner|Homestar]]''' || Hamstray, Hamster, Stramstar, [http://www.stairmaster.com Stairmaster], Homegrown, [[Wikipedia:Ramrod|Ramrod]], Humphel || [[A Jorb Well Done]]
|-
|-
| '''Hoot''' || Hort || [[Happy Hallow-day]]
| '''Hoot''' || Hort || [[Happy Hallow-day]]
|-
|-
-
| '''I Feel Bad''' || Ir feer borld || Email [[part-time job#Commentary Transcript|part-time job (commentary)]]
+
|-'''Hot'''  || Hat || Email [[part time job]]
 +
|-
 +
| '''I feel bad''' || Ir feer borld || Email [[part-time job#Commentary Transcript|part-time job (commentary)]]
|-
|-
| '''Idea''' || Idear || [[Happy Hallow-day]]
| '''Idea''' || Idear || [[Happy Hallow-day]]
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| '''[[Jibblie]]''' || Jorbaly || [[Jibblies 2]]
| '''[[Jibblie]]''' || Jorbaly || [[Jibblies 2]]
|-
|-
-
| '''Job''' || Jorb, Jaerb, Jarb, Joerghb, Jaeoreorb || [[A Jorb Well Done]],<br>Email [[boring (really)]], [[Sbemailiarized!]]
+
| '''Job''' || Jorb, Jaerb, Jarb, Joerghb, Jaeoreorb || [[A Jorb Well Done]], Email [[boring (really)]], [[Sbemailiarized!]]
|-
|-
-
| '''Jujyfruits''' || Jorjyfruits, Jerjyfrorts, Georgie Frorgie,<br>[[Wikipedia:George Foreman|George Foreman]] || [[The House That Gave Sucky Treats]]
+
| '''Jobbie''' || Jorbie || [[Haunted Photo Booth]]
|-
|-
-
| '''[[Coach Z's Locker Room|Locker]]''' || Lacker/Lacquer || Email [[part-time job#Commentary Transcript|part-time job (commentary)]],<br>Email [[myths & legends]] (Easter Egg)
+
| '''Jujyfruits''' || Jorjyfruits, Jerjyfrorts, Georgie Frorgie, [[Wikipedia:George Foreman|George Foreman]] || [[The House That Gave Sucky Treats]]
|-
|-
-
| '''Man''' || Marn || [[Dangeresque (karaoke)]]
+
| '''Kick''' || Kork || [[I Killed Pom Pom]], [[Haunted Photo Booth]]
 +
|-
 +
| '''[[Coach Z's Locker Room|Locker]]''' || Lacker, Lacquer || Email [[part-time job#Commentary Transcript|part-time job (commentary)]], Email [[myths & legends]] (Easter Egg)
 +
|-
 +
| '''Man''' || Marn, [[M'n]] || [[Dangeresque (karaoke)]], [[Mr. Poofers Must Die]]
 +
|-
 +
| '''Marshmallow''' || Mrashmallow || [[Later That Night...]]
 +
|-
 +
| '''[[Marzipan]]''' || Marziprawn || [[Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 17.2]]
|-
|-
| '''[[Mike Chapman|Mike]]''' || Mork || Email [[part-time job#Commentary Transcript|part-time job (commentary)]]
| '''[[Mike Chapman|Mike]]''' || Mork || Email [[part-time job#Commentary Transcript|part-time job (commentary)]]
 +
|-
 +
| '''Mind''' || Mornd || [[Haunted Photo Booth]]
|-
|-
| '''Mother'''|| Mudder|| [[No Hands On Deck!]]
| '''Mother'''|| Mudder|| [[No Hands On Deck!]]
 +
|-
 +
| '''Motivate''' || Mortavort || [[The Next April Fools' Thing]]
|-
|-
| '''Mouthwash''' || Mouthwarsh || [[The Best Decemberween Ever]]
| '''Mouthwash''' || Mouthwarsh || [[The Best Decemberween Ever]]
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| '''October''' || Orctober || [[The Best Decemberween Ever]]
| '''October''' || Orctober || [[The Best Decemberween Ever]]
|-
|-
-
| '''Off''' || Orf || Email [[winter pool]]
+
| '''Off''' || Orf || Email [[underlings]], Email [[winter pool]]
|-
|-
| '''Office''' || Arfice || [[In Search of the Yello Dello New Version|In Search of the Yello Dello]]
| '''Office''' || Arfice || [[In Search of the Yello Dello New Version|In Search of the Yello Dello]]
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| '''Part''' || Prat || [[Where My Hat Is At? (toon)]]
| '''Part''' || Prat || [[Where My Hat Is At? (toon)]]
|-
|-
-
| '''Party''' || Pratty || Email [[impression]]
+
| '''Party''' || Pratty || Email [[impression]], Email [[labor day]], Email [[being mean]]
|-
|-
-
| '''People''' || Perple || [[8-Bit is Enough]]
+
| '''People''' || Perple, Pyorple || [[8-Bit is Enough]], [[Fish Eye Lens]]
|-
|-
-
| '''[http://www.pertplus.com/ Pert Plus]''' || Port Plus || [[Jibblies 2]], [[hremail3184]] (part of actual packaging)
+
| '''Person''' || Porson || [[The Next April Fools' Thing]]
 +
|-
 +
| '''[[Wikipedia:Pert Plus|Pert Plus]]''' || Port Plus || [[Jibblies 2]], Email [[hremail3184]] (part of actual packaging)
 +
|-
 +
| '''Piña coladas''' || Piña colordas || [[I Killed Pom Pom]]
|-  
|-  
| '''[[Pom Pom]]''' || Pam Pam || [[Fall Float Parade]]
| '''[[Pom Pom]]''' || Pam Pam || [[Fall Float Parade]]
|-
|-
-
| '''Problem''' || Praeblem || [[In Search of the Yello Dello New Version|In Search of the Yello Dello]], [[On Break]]
+
| '''Probably''' || Prably || [[Coach Z's Character Video]]
|-
|-
-
| '''Rock bottom''' || Rack battom || [[Decemberween Short Shorts]]
+
| '''Problem''' || Praeblem, Prablem || [[In Search of the Yello Dello New Version|In Search of the Yello Dello]], [[On Break]], [[Who Said What Now?]]
 +
|-
 +
| '''Punch''' || Pornch || [[Haunted Photo Booth]]
|-
|-
| '''Real''' || Rrrl || [[A Folky Tale]]
| '''Real''' || Rrrl || [[A Folky Tale]]
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| '''Revealed''' || Revearled || Email [[cliffhangers]]
| '''Revealed''' || Revearled || Email [[cliffhangers]]
|-
|-
-
| '''Solid''' || Salid || [[Accent]]
+
| '''Rock bottom''' || Rack battom || [[Decemberween Short Shorts]]
 +
|-
 +
| '''Root beer''' || Root (pronounced with an "oo" as in "book") Ber || [[Mr. Poofers Must Die]]
 +
|-
 +
| '''Solid''' || Salid || Email [[Accent]]
|-
|-
| '''Secret''' || Sorcret, "secret sorcret" || Email [[cliffhangers]]
| '''Secret''' || Sorcret, "secret sorcret" || Email [[cliffhangers]]
|-
|-
| '''Situation''' || Sitch'ation || [[A Folky Tale]]
| '''Situation''' || Sitch'ation || [[A Folky Tale]]
 +
|-
 +
| '''''{Sneezing}''''' || Ha-chor || [[Haunted Photo Booth]]
|-
|-
| '''Speakin' ''' || Sporkin' || Email [[love poems]]
| '''Speakin' ''' || Sporkin' || Email [[love poems]]
Line 191: Line 237:
| '''Stop''' || Stap || [[Rap Song]]
| '''Stop''' || Stap || [[Rap Song]]
|-  
|-  
-
| '''[[Strong Bad]]''' || Spring Board || [[Accent]]
+
| '''[[Strong Bad]]''' || Spring Board || Email [[Accent]]
|-
|-
| '''Suck''' || Sook || [[Sbemail 169 Deleted Scene]]
| '''Suck''' || Sook || [[Sbemail 169 Deleted Scene]]
Line 209: Line 255:
|-
|-
| '''Thug''' || Thorg || [[Halloween Fairstival]]
| '''Thug''' || Thorg || [[Halloween Fairstival]]
-
|-
 
-
| '''Touchdown''' || Torchdown || [[Where My Hat Is At? (toon)]] ''(Written)''
 
|-
|-
| '''Thumb''' || Thermb || [[Some Stupid Turkey]]
| '''Thumb''' || Thermb || [[Some Stupid Turkey]]
|-
|-
-
| '''[[Toilet]]''' || Terlet || [[Halloween Fairstival]],<br>[[A Folky Tale]],<br>[[Halloween Potion-ma-jig]] (Bubs, Homestar),<br>Email [[unnatural]]
+
| '''[[Toilet]]''' || [[Terlet]] || [[Halloween Fairstival]], [[A Folky Tale]], Email [[unnatural]], [[The House That Gave Sucky Tricks]]
-
<!-- Please do not add "Torm" unless a cartoon is released where Coach Z says this by itself. In "highschool", he says "Foortball Torm", and that is covered further up in this list. -->
+
<!-- Please do not add "Torm" unless a cartoon is released where Coach Z says this by itself. In "highschool", he says "Foortball Torm", and that is covered further up in this list. -->
|-
|-
-
|'''Tomorrow''' || Tomoarow, || [[A Jorb Well Done]]
+
| '''Tomorrow''' || Tomoarow || [[A Jorb Well Done]]
 +
|-
 +
| '''Top notch''' || Torp nortch || [[I Killed Pom Pom]]
 +
|-
 +
| '''Touchdown''' || Torchdown || [[Where My Hat Is At? (toon)]] ''(Written)''
|-
|-
| '''Trick or Treat''' || Track or Trort || [[3 Times Halloween Funjob]]
| '''Trick or Treat''' || Track or Trort || [[3 Times Halloween Funjob]]
Line 227: Line 275:
| '''Up''' || Arp || [[Sbemail 169 Deleted Scene]]
| '''Up''' || Arp || [[Sbemail 169 Deleted Scene]]
|-
|-
-
| '''[[Wikipedia:Volvo|Volvo]]''' || Vorlvo || [[rated]]
+
| '''[[Wikipedia:Volvo|Volvo]]''' || Vorlvo || Email [[rated]]
|-
|-
| '''What''' || Whort || [[Date Nite]]
| '''What''' || Whort || [[Date Nite]]
|-
|-
-
| '''Video''' || Videro || [[Coach Z's 110%]]
+
| '''Video''' || Videro || [[Coach Z's 110%]], [[Fish Eye Lens]]
|-
|-
-
| '''Yipe''' || Yorp || Email [[redesign]]
+
| '''Yipe''' || Yorp || Email [[redesign]], [[Homestar Ruiner]]
|-
|-
| '''[[Wikipedia:Yo Gabba Gabba|Yo Gabba Gabba]] || Yor garble garble || [[Most in the Graveyard]]
| '''[[Wikipedia:Yo Gabba Gabba|Yo Gabba Gabba]] || Yor garble garble || [[Most in the Graveyard]]
Line 246: Line 294:
Evidence has suggested that Coach Z's accent may be bogus:
Evidence has suggested that Coach Z's accent may be bogus:
-
*After saying "track or trort" in [[3 Times Halloween Funjob]], Bubs gets on his case and he says "trick or treat" correctly. If given "Swedish Fish," said as "Swordish Forsh," Bubs gets on his case again and Coach Z says "It's a crowd-pleaser."
+
*After saying "track or trort" in [[3 Times Halloween Funjob]], Bubs gets on his case and he says "trick or treat" correctly. If given "Swedish Fish", said as "Swordish Forsh", Bubs gets on his case again and Coach Z says "It's a crowd-pleaser."
*In [[boring (really)]], while Strong Bad is writing his list of three-letter words, Coach Z interrupts him at the word "job", saying that "jorb is a four letters word."
*In [[boring (really)]], while Strong Bad is writing his list of three-letter words, Coach Z interrupts him at the word "job", saying that "jorb is a four letters word."
-
*Coach Z says "The Cheat" immediately after "The Chort" in [[mascot]], though he speaks as though he's talking about two different people.
+
*Coach Z says "The Cheat" immediately after "The Chort" in [[mascot]], though he speaks as though he's talking about two different people. He also refers to "Cheat kickers" just before suggesting to "[[Kicking The Cheat|kick The Chort]]" in [[Baddest of the Bands]].
*In the DVD commentary for [[part-time job]], [[Mike Chapman|Mike]] exploits Coach Z's "accent" by implying that not only does Coach Z add the letter R to words, but now also likes to switch letters around sometimes, and in reply Coach Z partially admits to his accent being bogus.
*In the DVD commentary for [[part-time job]], [[Mike Chapman|Mike]] exploits Coach Z's "accent" by implying that not only does Coach Z add the letter R to words, but now also likes to switch letters around sometimes, and in reply Coach Z partially admits to his accent being bogus.
*In [[cliffhangers]], in the process of his attempted unmasking of [[The Thnikkaman]], he says "secret sorcret" twice, referring to Thnikkaman's secret being revealed and his shame in having really bad hand-eye coordination.
*In [[cliffhangers]], in the process of his attempted unmasking of [[The Thnikkaman]], he says "secret sorcret" twice, referring to Thnikkaman's secret being revealed and his shame in having really bad hand-eye coordination.
*While playing [[Renaldo]] in [[Dangeresque 3: The Criminal Projective]], he pronounces "off" both correctly and incorrectly in the same sentence.
*While playing [[Renaldo]] in [[Dangeresque 3: The Criminal Projective]], he pronounces "off" both correctly and incorrectly in the same sentence.
*In [[Loading Screens]], Coach Z's accent is much less pronounced than usual.
*In [[Loading Screens]], Coach Z's accent is much less pronounced than usual.
 +
* In [[Fish Eye Lens]], Coach Z tells Strong Bad "the people" need him. Strong Bad questions him, and he amends to say "the pyorple".
 +
This is inconsistent with the clear despair it causes him in [[A Jorb Well Done]], though it is possible that he's truly gained control over his accent after the mentioned toon, and he just keeps it around for the aesthetic.
===Featured in===
===Featured in===
Line 259: Line 309:
==Coach Z's "more than two problems"==
==Coach Z's "more than two problems"==
-
Coach Z has claimed to have "more than two problems." An analysis of his behavior shows the following problems.
+
:''Main article: [[Coach Z's Problems]]''
-
*Medical
+
-
**He has "[[rampage|problems with his feet]]", including [[labor day|athlete's foot]], [[Doomy Tales of the Macabre | bunions, corns and calluses]].
+
-
**He has [[#Character Video Transcript|mentioned]] [[rampage|several times]] that he [[slumber party|has a bad back]].
+
-
**When his bathing suit is removed, he [[underlings|leaks a black fluid]].
+
-
**He has [[cliffhangers|bad hand-eye coordination]].
+
-
 
+
-
*Psychological
+
-
**He [[garage sale|thinks that he is a mother]].
+
-
**He [[Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 8.0|sometimes forgets what's real and what's just in his head]].
+
-
**He has an obsession with [[butts]].
+
-
**He seems to [[Date Nite|believe he's in a relationship with Bubs]].
+
-
**He has [[mini-golf|short-term memory loss]].
+
-
**He once asked a [[Wormdingler|drawing he made]] to [[Trogday 08#Easter_Eggs|be his bride]].
+
-
**He believes that a [[diorama|sketch of a cell phone]] is a real cell phone.
+
-
**He asked Homestar to [[Baddest of the Bands|marry him]].
+
-
**He has an [[imaginary|imaginary friend]] named "Real Live Actual Mr. Blangcaster Next Door", and by the look of his outline, is very shady looking.
+
-
 
+
-
*[[Alcohol]]ism
+
-
**He has been drunk multiple times, usually on [[Listerine]].
+
-
**He spiked the punch at the [[senior prom]] with Listerine.
+
-
**He [[Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 5.0|called Marzipan while being drunk]], along with Bubs.
+
-
 
+
-
*Anti-social behavior
+
-
**He wears a [[underlings|disturbingly small bathing suit]] when swimming, and doesn't realize that it makes others uncomfortable.
+
-
**It has been implied that he [[Marzipan and Coach Z's Relationship|has a crush on Marzipan]]. He has occasionally made [[Fall Float Parade|"inapprapriate" comments]] about her and has [[Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 9.2|let it slip]] that he snuck into her house. It now seems that he has been [[Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 16.2|given a restraining order]] preventing him from coming within 500 feet of [[Marzipan's house]].
+
-
**He was sent to [[Play Date|juvenile prison]].
+
-
 
+
-
*Hygiene
+
-
**He holds the [[record book|record]] for the longest time gone without [[showering]].
+
-
**He wears [[shapeshifter|sweaty pants]].
+
-
**He [[hremail3184|showers with spit]].
+
-
 
+
-
*Speech Impediment
+
-
**See [[#Coach Z's Accent|above]].
+
-
 
+
-
*Lack of generally common knowledge
+
-
**Despite being a coach, he [[secret recipes|doesn't know what a basketball is]].
+
-
**He's [[rampage|bad at abbreviations]].
+
-
**He claims to [[Sbemail 169 Deleted Scene|only know a few words]], such as "pfargtl", his "favorite animal".
+
-
**At one point, he believed that the shower heads in his locker room were his "[[hygiene|drippy, broken speakers]]".
+
-
**He believes a [[cardboard box]] with a detached microphone is a [[Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 15.2|record studio]].
+
-
**He thinks [[environment|cooking with hydroelectricity]] means running a hot dog under the shower.
+
-
 
+
-
*Financial
+
-
**He claims he [[These Peoples Try To Fade Me|has money, but not much]].
+
-
**He lives in a gymnasium locker room.
+
-
**He frequently has his power shut off because he [[Homestar Presents: Presents|forgets to pay his bills]].
+
-
**He has occasionally [[Blubb-O's Commercial|attempted to be sent to prison]], since he would be guaranteed "three square meals a day".
+
-
**He [[secret recipes|can't afford "money cost"]] ice cream.
+
-
 
+
-
*Miscellaneous
+
-
**He often [[secret recipes|pukes his pants]].
+
-
**He carries a bottle of [[Halloween Potion-ma-jig|questionable water]] with him at all times for questionable reasons.
+
-
**Even when he finds he's eating something awful, he [[secret recipes|still eats it]].
+
-
**He [[Sbemail 169 Deleted Scene|enjoys covering puke in sawdust]], claiming that "Sawdust makes everything delicious".
+
-
**He admits he [[theme park|likes a good chafe]].
+
-
**He never seems to notice or complain that there is [[Homestar Ruiner|itching powder in his jock strap]].
+
==Discography==
==Discography==
Line 324: Line 317:
*[[Rap Song]] featuring [[Peacey P]] and [[Tenerence Love]] (2007)
*[[Rap Song]] featuring [[Peacey P]] and [[Tenerence Love]] (2007)
*[[Loading Screens]] with [[Strong Bad]] and [[Homestar Runner]]
*[[Loading Screens]] with [[Strong Bad]] and [[Homestar Runner]]
 +
*[[Fish Eye Lens]]
 +
*[[The Wraparound]]
== Fun Facts ==
== Fun Facts ==
Line 329: Line 324:
*It was revealed in issue #21 of [[Wonkavision Magazine Interview|Wonkavision]] magazine that Coach Z is named after [[Craig Zobel]].
*It was revealed in issue #21 of [[Wonkavision Magazine Interview|Wonkavision]] magazine that Coach Z is named after [[Craig Zobel]].
*According to [[trading cards]], Coach Z gave 23 [[Butt-Patting|butt pats]] in 1984 (22 to Homestar, 1 to himself).
*According to [[trading cards]], Coach Z gave 23 [[Butt-Patting|butt pats]] in 1984 (22 to Homestar, 1 to himself).
-
*Coach Z was originally known as "Coach Zee."
+
*Coach Z was originally known as "Coach Zee".
*Strong Bad referred to Coach Z as "Green Bubs" in the email [[road trip]].
*Strong Bad referred to Coach Z as "Green Bubs" in the email [[road trip]].
*In [[Date Nite]] he is shown without his hat and wearing hair curlers, despite a lack of visible hair.
*In [[Date Nite]] he is shown without his hat and wearing hair curlers, despite a lack of visible hair.
Line 344: Line 339:
*[[Strong Sad and Coach Z's Relationship]]
*[[Strong Sad and Coach Z's Relationship]]
*[[Strong Mad and Coach Z's Relationship]]
*[[Strong Mad and Coach Z's Relationship]]
 +
*[[Coach Z and The Cheat's Relationship]]
== Variations ==
== Variations ==
Line 350: Line 346:
*[[Renaldo]] ([[Dangeresque (film series)|Dangeresque]])
*[[Renaldo]] ([[Dangeresque (film series)|Dangeresque]])
*[[Zubs and Coach B|Coach B or Zubs]]  
*[[Zubs and Coach B|Coach B or Zubs]]  
-
*[[Other Character Variations|Coach Zed]]
+
*[[Coach Zed]]
*[[Strong Badman Characters#Damp Towel Man|Damp Towel Man]]
*[[Strong Badman Characters#Damp Towel Man|Damp Towel Man]]
 +
*[[Zoach C]] ([[Xeriouxly Forxe]])
 +
*[[Yonder Website Character Variations#Character 3|Character 3]] ([[Characters from Yonder Website|Yonder Website]])
=== [[Halloween Costumes]] ===
=== [[Halloween Costumes]] ===
-
In each Homestar Runner Halloween special, Coach Z has dressed up as something hip-hop-related, or in the case of Theo Huxtable, something he believes to be hip-hop related. (The Noid costume was not released.)
+
In each Homestar Runner Halloween special, Coach Z has dressed up as something rap or [[hip-hop]]-related, or in the case of Theo Huxtable, something he believes to be hip-hop related. (The [[wikipedia:Noid|Noid]] and [[wikipedia:Bob and Doug McKenzie|Doug McKenzie]] costumes were not released.)
-
*[[Wikipedia:Flavor Flav|Flavor Flav]] in [[Homestarloween Party]].
+
*[[Wikipedia:Flavor Flav|Flavor Flav]] (of [[Wikipedia:Public Enemy|Public Enemy]]) in [[Homestarloween Party]]
-
*[[Wikipedia:Shock G|Humpty Hump]] in [[The House That Gave Sucky Treats]].
+
*[[Wikipedia:Shock G|Humpty Hump]] (of [[Wikipedia:Digital Underground|Digital Underground]]) in [[The House That Gave Sucky Treats]]
-
*[[Wikipedia:Christopher "Kid" Reid|Kid]] in [[Pumpkin Carve-nival]].
+
*[[Wikipedia:Christopher "Kid" Reid|Kid]] (of [[Wikipedia:Kid and Play|Kid and Play]]) in [[Pumpkin Carve-nival]]
-
*[[Wikipedia:Kool Moe Dee|Kool Moe Dee]] in [[3 Times Halloween Funjob]].
+
*[[Wikipedia:Kool Moe Dee|Kool Moe Dee]] (of [[Wikipedia:The Treacherous Three|The Treacherous Three]]) in [[3 Times Halloween Funjob]]
-
*[[Wikipedia:Tupac Shakur|Tupac]] in [[Halloween Fairstival]].
+
*[[Wikipedia:Tupac Shakur|Tupac]] in [[Halloween Fairstival]]
-
*Theo Huxtable (from [[Wikipedia:The Cosby Show|The Cosby Show]]) in [[Halloween Potion-ma-jig]].
+
*Theo Huxtable (from [[Wikipedia:The Cosby Show|The Cosby Show]]) in [[Halloween Potion-ma-jig]]
-
*[[Wikipedia:Queen Latifah|Queen Latifah]] in [[Happy Hallow-day]].
+
*[[Wikipedia:Queen Latifah|Queen Latifah]] in [[Happy Hallow-day]]
-
*[[Wikipedia:So So Def Recordings|So So Def Recordings Logo]] in [[Jibblies 2]].
+
*[[Wikipedia:So So Def Recordings|So So Def Recordings Logo]] in [[Jibblies 2]]
-
*[[Wikipedia:Lance Robertson|DJ Lance Rock]] in [[Most in the Graveyard]].
+
*[[Wikipedia:Lance Robertson|DJ Lance Rock]] (from [[Wikipedia:Yo Gabba Gabba|Yo Gabba Gabba]]) in [[Most in the Graveyard]]
-
*[[Wikipedia:MC Skat Kat|MC Skat Kat]] in [[Doomy Tales of the Macabre]].
+
*[[Wikipedia:MC Skat Kat|MC Skat Kat]] in [[Doomy Tales of the Macabre]]
 +
*Notebook Paper ("The Rapping Paper") in [[Which Ween Costumes?]]
 +
*[[Wikipedia:A Tribe Called Quest|A Tribe Called Quest]] (their album cover mascot) in [[I Killed Pom Pom]]
 +
*[[Wikipedia:André 3000|André 3000]] (of [[Outkast]]) in [[The House That Gave Sucky Tricks]]
 +
*[[Wikipedia:Kwamé|Kwamé]] in [[Later That Night...]]
 +
*[[Wikipedia:PaRappa the Rapper|PaRappa the Rapper]] in [[Haunted Photo Booth]]
 +
*[[Wikipedia:Missy Elliot|Missy Elliott]] (As her head, with Pom Pom as her inflatable suit) in [[Mr. Poofers Must Die]]
 +
*[[Wikipedia:DJ Jazzy Jeff & The Fresh Prince|The Fresh Prince]]'s Mom in [[The Homestar Runner Enters the Spooky Woods]]
==Quotes of the Week==
==Quotes of the Week==
Line 387: Line 392:
*[[Coach Z Other Costumes|Other Costumes]]
*[[Coach Z Other Costumes|Other Costumes]]
*[[Nicknames#Coach Z|Nicknames]]
*[[Nicknames#Coach Z|Nicknames]]
 +
*[[Fort Wayne Locomotive]]
 +
*[[Shadowy Figure]]
 +
*[[20X6 Coach Z]]
== External Links ==
== External Links ==

Revision as of 20:56, 26 September 2020

Character: Coach Z
watch Coach Z's character video Marzipan Bubs
He has more than two problems.
This article is about the main character. For the Teen Girl Squad character, see Olympic Man and Coach.

Contents

Biography

Coach Z is the "coach" of the residents of Free Country, USA, though it is unclear exactly which sports he coaches. He has a strong accent, based on an Upper Midwestern accent (though it is also sometimes simply nonsensical) which is sometimes difficult for other characters to understand. While occasionally tiresome, he is always ready to offer encouragement and is rarely critical of anyone. When giving advice, he tends to start with the phrase "You can't just rush into the score zone", which has lost its meaning through time.

Coach Z wears a blue and purple baseball cap and a large gold Z emblem around his waist. Nobody knows for sure whether his bright green color is his skin or a body suit. However, baby Coach Z seems to be wearing footy pajamas in the email highschool, and on more than one occasion, Coach Z has mentioned his pants. In shapeshifter, Coach Z referred to his outfit as his "sweaty sweat-sweats", which was seen to have at least one pocket, and in Fan Costumes 2017 he is implied to have undressed. His head is a white sphere with light gray circles for eyes. Coach Z lacks a visible nose and mouth, but is able to talk, eat, and spit with ease. He has long arms and large feet, but very short legs.

An unshaven Coach Z talking about his butt.

As Coach Z himself is not afraid to admit, he's got more than two problems. Despite being a coach, he doesn't know what a basketball is, as indicated in secret recipes. It has been strongly implied that he has a crush on Marzipan, and he has occasionally made inappropriate comments about her; one occasion on her answering machine when he was drunk, and another during the commercial break of the 4Tst annual Fall Float Parade. In diorama, Coach Z even refers to Marzipan as his "gorgeous girlfriend". He also has difficulty pronouncing certain words, such as "job" (as shown in the "A Jorb Well Done" cartoon), instead pronouncing it as "jorb", "jaerb", or "jorearb". In addition to his frequent mispronunciations, Coach Z also seems to have mental and gender confusion problems, as evidenced by the time he spent "talking to his parents" on a disconnected telephone, and claiming to be a mother in garage sale. He has even stated on one occasion that he sometimes "forgets what's real, and what's just in [his] head". He has an apparent fixation with butts, and he seems to have a habit of butt-patting. He also has a slight obsession with ointments and body creams, like using 'Blue Star Ointment' to scare people in Halloween Fairstival. Many characters see him as a nuisance. Even Homestar treated Coach Z with contempt in Decemberween Short Shorts, quickly refusing to allow Coach Z to come to his house for Decemberween.

When not working as a coach, Coach Z works with Homestar Runner and Bubs as the apparent local law enforcement in Free Country, USA. Coach Z is also the janitor at the office where Homestar and Strong Bad work. He is paid on hourly wage and is clearly jealous that Strong Bad is paid on salary. He has also spent time dressed as the Blubb-O's Drive-Thru Whale mascot. Coach Z owns four Tony awards, suggesting that he may have a background in theatre. Despite his numerous jobs, Coach Z has trouble managing his money, causing his electricity to be shut off each year.

The craptain of the foortball torm!

Coach Z is a fan of hip-hop and rap music, particularly the Wu-Tang Clan. He fancies himself a rapper as well: He released the single "These Peoples Try to Fade Me", which appeared on Strong Bad Sings and Other Type Hits, his solo album, entitled "The Z Is All Up Ins", features the smash hit "Hip Hop Dance", and his own rap song, "Rap Song" (featuring Peacey P and Tenerence Love). Although his usual rapping prowess consists mainly of "count[ing] to two over and over again", as explained in nightlife, he once had a very successful career during his days in the Two-o Duo. More recent works such as "Loading Screens" and "Fish Eye Lens" may indicate that his rap skills are starting to improve.

"Hey, watch where y'er pointin' that 3D!"

Coach Z's age is ambiguous, as he appears to be grown up when Strong Bad was a kid in the email stand-up as well as appearing as an adult in 1974 in the 'toon Decemberween short shorts while they both appeared to be babies in the email highschool (although this may simply be a product of Strong Bad's "doodle memory"). He is likely to be one of the older characters, since in caffeine, Strong Sad's slaps provoke him to cry out "I'm just an old man!"; in slumber party, Strong Bad refers to him, Bubs, and The King of Town as "older kids"; and while narrating an interaction between Coach Z and Bubs in narrator, Strong Bad labels them both as "weird old men".

Coach Z and Bubs had a falling out at one point, as Fall Float Parade shows us; Bubs makes a "Coach Z, you jerk!" float for the parade, and Coach Z retaliates by saying "Serves him right, then" when Strong Mad steals his concession stand. In the email narrator, it was shown that they had made-up and returned to having boring conversations about Bubs's napkins. However, in Most In The Graveyard, when it is implied that Coach Z fancies Bubs' sister, Bubs beats him up. In the same toon, it is also revealed that Coach Z and Bubs may actually be very distant cousins, although Bubs finds this hard to believe.


Character Video Transcript

Main article: Coach Z's Character Video

COACH Z: {looking slightly offscreen} Is that thing on? {turns to the camera lens} Hey there, ho there! I'm the Coach! The Coach Z, I'd guess you'd call me. Or plain old Coach is fine, seein' as I'm the only one around, so, probably no one else would answer to that. You say "Hey Coach!", and I'd say "Yeah?" or... "That's me!" or... "Hoo-hah!" {waves his arms in the air} Any one of those. There's rumors flyin' around that I sleep in one of these lockers, {gestures to the lockers behind him} but uh, that's just not true. I usually crash on this bench here. {gestures to the bench behind him} My back's not in real good condition. {rubs his back} And now, I'd like to perform my hip-hop single, "These peoples try to fade me". {holds up a microphone, begins to sing} A one-two, a one-two—!

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {appears in front of camera} Sorry. We're all out of tape.

Coach Z's Accent

The primary factor in his hilarity, Coach Z's Upper Midwestern accent has made him into a very quotable character.

Sounds Affected

The most commonly mispronounced sounds are long e (e.g. The Cheat) and the short o (job), which both come out as an "or" or "aer" ("The Chort", "jaerb"), although in a few toons such as 3 Times Halloween Funjob, he's shown to purposely do it.

List of mispronounced words

Original Word Coach Z's version(s) Appears In
Absolutely Abso-prootley, Absalortly Email Accent, I Killed Pom Pom
About Abrat/Abort No Hands On Deck!, Happy Hallow-day, Loading Screens, Doomy Tales of the Macabre
Accent Orccent/Accernt Email Accent
Action Airkshin Happy Fireworks, Main Page 23
Apartment Apratment Email sbemail206
Athlete Airthlete The Homestar Runner Gets Something Stuck in His Craw
Awful Orful Email secret recipes
Back Bork I Killed Pom Pom
Balloon B'lloon Fall Float Parade
Believe Belorve Haunted Photo Booth
Bomb Baermb The House That Gave Sucky Treats, These peoples try to fade me
Boulevard Borlevard I Killed Pom Pom
Captain Craptain Email highschool
Charge Chiioooorge Strong Badia the Free
Chips Chorps 3 Times Halloween Funjob
Chop Chorp Haunted Photo Booth
Crap Crop Email Accent
Credenza Cradernzair 3 Times Halloween Funjob
Crickets Crackets Happy Hallow-day
Cubicle Kyorbicle DNA Evidence
Decemberween Decemberwern The Best Decemberween Ever
DELETED DELORTED Email replacement
Did Doird Dangeresque (karaoke)
Disco Disca Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 9.2
Do it Dort Meeple Grove
Drop Drap Email your funeral
Duck Dook Sbemail 169 Deleted Scene
Exaggerate Exorggerate Email Accent
Effigy Orfigy, arfigy, RPG, first-person shooter Strong Badia the Free
Fhqwhgads Forhorglingrads Email sibbie (Easter Egg)
Field Fierld Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 1.0, Coach Z's 110%, Email dictionary
Fittin' Fortin' I Killed Pom Pom
Five Farve A Decemberween Pageant
Flapjacks Florpjacks Email Accent
Fluffy Puffs Florfy Porfs Later That Night...
Football Team Foortball Torm Email highschool
Forgot to putt Forgort to port, forgat to prat, gorka fa pork Email mini-golf
Forward Frorward Doomy Tales of the Macabre
Gosh Gorsh Email strong badathlon, Dangeresque 3: The Criminal Projective, Later That Night...
Globes Glorbs Later That Night...
Gluten and Glutton Glorten Weclome Back
Half Half (non-silent L) Mr. Poofers Must Die
Halloween Halloworn, Hallerwern The Best Decemberween Ever, Jibblies 2
Handlebar Handlebrah Haunted Photo Booth
Happy Hallow— Horpy Horlow— Happy Hallow-day
Happy T Horpy Tor Happy T!
Hello Hellor Homestar Presents: Presents
Homestar Hamstray, Hamster, Stramstar, Stairmaster, Homegrown, Ramrod, Humphel A Jorb Well Done
Hoot Hort Happy Hallow-day
I feel bad Ir feer borld Email part-time job (commentary)
Idea Idear Happy Hallow-day
Inappropriate Inapprapriate Fall Float Parade
Inoculate Anorculate BHZ Anniversary Message
Jibblie Jorbaly Jibblies 2
Job Jorb, Jaerb, Jarb, Joerghb, Jaeoreorb A Jorb Well Done, Email boring (really), Sbemailiarized!
Jobbie Jorbie Haunted Photo Booth
Jujyfruits Jorjyfruits, Jerjyfrorts, Georgie Frorgie, George Foreman The House That Gave Sucky Treats
Kick Kork I Killed Pom Pom, Haunted Photo Booth
Locker Lacker, Lacquer Email part-time job (commentary), Email myths & legends (Easter Egg)
Man Marn, M'n Dangeresque (karaoke), Mr. Poofers Must Die
Marshmallow Mrashmallow Later That Night...
Marzipan Marziprawn Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 17.2
Mike Mork Email part-time job (commentary)
Mind Mornd Haunted Photo Booth
Mother Mudder No Hands On Deck!
Motivate Mortavort The Next April Fools' Thing
Mouthwash Mouthwarsh The Best Decemberween Ever
Musical Myorsical No Hands On Deck!
Not Nat Decemberween Short Shorts, Sbemail 169 Deleted Scene
October Orctober The Best Decemberween Ever
Off Orf Email underlings, Email winter pool
Office Arfice In Search of the Yello Dello
Out Oat A Jorb Well Done
Part Prat Where My Hat Is At? (toon)
Party Pratty Email impression, Email labor day, Email being mean
People Perple, Pyorple 8-Bit is Enough, Fish Eye Lens
Person Porson The Next April Fools' Thing
Pert Plus Port Plus Jibblies 2, Email hremail3184 (part of actual packaging)
Piña coladas Piña colordas I Killed Pom Pom
Pom Pom Pam Pam Fall Float Parade
Probably Prably Coach Z's Character Video
Problem Praeblem, Prablem In Search of the Yello Dello, On Break, Who Said What Now?
Punch Pornch Haunted Photo Booth
Real Rrrl A Folky Tale
Revealed Revearled Email cliffhangers
Rock bottom Rack battom Decemberween Short Shorts
Root beer Root (pronounced with an "oo" as in "book") Ber Mr. Poofers Must Die
Solid Salid Email Accent
Secret Sorcret, "secret sorcret" Email cliffhangers
Situation Sitch'ation A Folky Tale
{Sneezing} Ha-chor Haunted Photo Booth
Speakin' Sporkin' Email love poems
Sports Sprots Email part-time job (commentary)
Stick Stark Dangeresque (karaoke)
Stop Stap Rap Song
Strong Bad Spring Board Email Accent
Suck Sook Sbemail 169 Deleted Scene
Swedish Fish Swordish Forsh 3 Times Halloween Funjob
Talkin' about Torkin' abort Happy Hallow-day
Terrible Terbirle Email senior prom
The Cheat The Chort see Nicknames
There Dere, dare Email lures & jigs, Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 9.2, Email theme park, Sbemail 169 Deleted Scene
Thousand Trousand Sbemail 169 Deleted Scene
Thug Thorg Halloween Fairstival
Thumb Thermb Some Stupid Turkey
Toilet Terlet Halloween Fairstival, A Folky Tale, Email unnatural, The House That Gave Sucky Tricks
Tomorrow Tomoarow A Jorb Well Done
Top notch Torp nortch I Killed Pom Pom
Touchdown Torchdown Where My Hat Is At? (toon) (Written)
Trick or Treat Track or Trort 3 Times Halloween Funjob
Undefeated Undeforted Decemberween Short Shorts
Unfortunate Unfarchunate Sbemail 169 Deleted Scene
Up Arp Sbemail 169 Deleted Scene
Volvo Vorlvo Email rated
What Whort Date Nite
Video Videro Coach Z's 110%, Fish Eye Lens
Yipe Yorp Email redesign, Homestar Ruiner
Yo Gabba Gabba Yor garble garble Most in the Graveyard
You Say Tomato,
I Say Tomato
You Say Tomater, "I zader matermorts" Fall Float Parade

Inconsistencies

Evidence has suggested that Coach Z's accent may be bogus:

  • After saying "track or trort" in 3 Times Halloween Funjob, Bubs gets on his case and he says "trick or treat" correctly. If given "Swedish Fish", said as "Swordish Forsh", Bubs gets on his case again and Coach Z says "It's a crowd-pleaser."
  • In boring (really), while Strong Bad is writing his list of three-letter words, Coach Z interrupts him at the word "job", saying that "jorb is a four letters word."
  • Coach Z says "The Cheat" immediately after "The Chort" in mascot, though he speaks as though he's talking about two different people. He also refers to "Cheat kickers" just before suggesting to "kick The Chort" in Baddest of the Bands.
  • In the DVD commentary for part-time job, Mike exploits Coach Z's "accent" by implying that not only does Coach Z add the letter R to words, but now also likes to switch letters around sometimes, and in reply Coach Z partially admits to his accent being bogus.
  • In cliffhangers, in the process of his attempted unmasking of The Thnikkaman, he says "secret sorcret" twice, referring to Thnikkaman's secret being revealed and his shame in having really bad hand-eye coordination.
  • While playing Renaldo in Dangeresque 3: The Criminal Projective, he pronounces "off" both correctly and incorrectly in the same sentence.
  • In Loading Screens, Coach Z's accent is much less pronounced than usual.
  • In Fish Eye Lens, Coach Z tells Strong Bad "the people" need him. Strong Bad questions him, and he amends to say "the pyorple".

This is inconsistent with the clear despair it causes him in A Jorb Well Done, though it is possible that he's truly gained control over his accent after the mentioned toon, and he just keeps it around for the aesthetic.

Featured in

Coach Z's "more than two problems"

Main article: Coach Z's Problems

Discography

Fun Facts

  • Coach Z's accent came from a depressing Midwestern voice that Matt and some friends would do in college.
  • It was revealed in issue #21 of Wonkavision magazine that Coach Z is named after Craig Zobel.
  • According to trading cards, Coach Z gave 23 butt pats in 1984 (22 to Homestar, 1 to himself).
  • Coach Z was originally known as "Coach Zee".
  • Strong Bad referred to Coach Z as "Green Bubs" in the email road trip.
  • In Date Nite he is shown without his hat and wearing hair curlers, despite a lack of visible hair.
  • On Coach Z's emblem, the darker blue shine streak under the gold Z makes a backwards Z formation.
  • According to the Old Characters Page, Coach Z wasn't much of a coach at the time, and he just added the title because it sounded "cooler than just Z". He has been seen coaching on numerous occasions since then, though his talent at it is still dubious at best.
  • Coach Z is given a new display of angry eyes, as shown in Kick-A-Ball and hremail3184.

Relationships

Main article: Character Relationships

Variations

Halloween Costumes

In each Homestar Runner Halloween special, Coach Z has dressed up as something rap or hip-hop-related, or in the case of Theo Huxtable, something he believes to be hip-hop related. (The Noid and Doug McKenzie costumes were not released.)

Quotes of the Week

See Also

External Links

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