A Jumping Jack Contest

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Day 1 of the contest

Strong Bad, Strong Sad, Homestar Runner, Pom Pom, and Bubs enter a contest where whoever continually jumps jacks for the longest wins.

Cast (in order of appearance): Bubs, Strong Bad, Homestar Runner, Pom Pom, Strong Sad, The Announcer, The Cheat, Strong Mad, The Poopsmith

Places: Contest Area, The Field, Bubs' Concession Stand, Swimming Pool

Running Time: 5:17

Date: Thursday, April 27, 2000 or earlier

Page Title: Jumping Jack Contest

DVD: Everything Else, Volume 2

Contents

Strong Bad Lib Transcript

Note: Words that are starred (*, **) are entered once and reused correspondingly.

What I Saw Last Week
a Strong Badlib

No, seriously. I'm a pretty (adjective) person. But I saw this one (noun) last week and boy was it (adjective). This (adjective) guy was at (restaurant) and he started (-ing verb)* (plural noun)**. I was like, '(exclamation)! You're (-ing verb)* (plural noun)**.' He told me to stop (-ing verb) him. I (verb (past)) on his shoes.

Transcript

{Open on a grey background with a swirl pattern. Theme music plays. The beginning credits, written in red, roll with white silhouettes of characters jumping jacks moving past in the background: first Homestar, then Strong Bad, followed by Pom Pom and then Bubs. Fade to black and pan up from silhouetted bushes to zoom in on Bubs, Strong Bad, Homestar, Pom Pom, and Strong Sad standing on a large, wooden platform with pole-mounted speakers and a banner on it reading "A JUMPING JACK CONTEST!" set on the field. Zooming stops and the Announcer comes in from the right, standing close to the camera, holding a microphone.}

THE ANNOUNCER: Good afternoo—

{He is cut off by microphone feedback and winces.}

THE ANNOUNCER: Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen, welcome to a jumping jack contest!

{Cut to a closer full-body shot of Bubs doing a quick dance. His name appears onscreen, as with the rest of the contestants.}

THE ANNOUNCER: {off-screen} Our five hot contestants—

{Pan right to Strong Bad hitting the sides of his head.}

THE ANNOUNCER: {off-screen} —will compete to see who can sustain their jumping jacks—

{Pan right to Homestar Runner quickly hopping up and down.}

THE ANNOUNCER: {off-screen} —for the longest time!

{Pan right to Pom Pom bouncing from side to side.}

THE ANNOUNCER: {off-screen} Any contestant that ceases to jump jack, even for a moment,—

{Pan right to Strong Sad.}

THE ANNOUNCER: {off-screen} — is out of the competition.

{Strong Sad slowly sighs. Cut to The Announcer.}

THE ANNOUNCER: On your mark... get set... go!

{He holds up a starting pistol and the camera pans to follow it as he fires it into the air. Theme music plays. Cut to silhouettes of the contestants doing jumping jacks. Cut to a close-up of Strong Sad.}

STRONG SAD: {after two jacks} Whew. {sweats} I quit.

{Cut to close-up of Homestar.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {still jumping jacks} All right, Strong Sad! That's twice as many as last year!

{Music stops. Cut to Strong Bad jumping jacks. The Cheat emerges from behind the wooden platform.}

THE CHEAT: {The Cheat noises}

STRONG BAD: Ah, The Cheat! Is everything ready?

{The Cheat nods.}

STRONG BAD: Good! Now go, and win us this competition!

{As Strong Bad says this, The Cheat races off to the right.}

{Cut to Homestar. The Cheat comes in from the left and jumps up on stage to the right of Homestar with a glass of melonade on a platter.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Hey, The Cheat, what's up?

THE CHEAT: {The Cheat noises}

{Cut to a rippling view of Homestar Runner as seen through the glass of melonade.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: A glass of melonade for me? Hmmm... okay!

{Cut back to the wide view. The Cheat holds up the platter, and Homestar drinks it through a straw.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Thanks, The Cheat!

{Cut to a grassy area, empty except for Strong Mad standing by with some kegs of melonade. As The Cheat scurries into the frame and sets down the glass of melonade, Strong Mad refills The Cheat's empty glass.}

THE CHEAT: {The Cheat noises}

{The Cheat runs off with the refilled glass. Cut to a medium shot of Homestar at the Competition Area. The Cheat goes to Homestar Runner and pokes him in the back. Cut to a wide shot, with Pom Pom visible to the right.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Oh, another one! {drinks}

{Cut to a montage of Homestar Runner drinking glass after glass of melonade, Strong Mad refilling the glasses, and The Cheat fetching him more against a melonade-colored background while music plays. Wipe down to reveal Homestar Runner's belly, now swollen and sloshing as he jumps his jacks with crossed legs. Zoom out to a wide shot including Strong Bad jumping jacks to the left.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Oh... I drank too many melonades... {queasy-sounding musical effect}

STRONG BAD: Hey, you not looking so good, Homestar. I think you better drop out.

{Cut to the empty field. The Cheat and Strong Mad high five. Cut back to Homestar and Pom Pom jumping jacks at the Competition Area.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Seriously, Pom Pom, I'm about to pee my pants.

POM POM: {bubbles}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Great idea, Pom Pom! But do you think he can get here in time?

{Cut to a close-up of Homestar's head. Homestar closes his eyes and gives a sigh of relief. Cut to a shot of the whole competition area showing The Poopsmith walking away holding a jar of yellow liquid. Homestar's belly is now empty.}

{Cut to the grey screen, where a silhouette of Bubs jumping jacks, with stationary red text reading "Day 2" inside, grows and shrinks. A simple rhythm plays. Cut back to the competition.}

STRONG BAD: Hey, Bubs, looks like quite a line is building up at your concession stand.

{Cut to Bubs' stand. The "customers" waiting in line are The Cheat and Strong Mad. Strong Mad taps his foot while The Cheat looks around.}

THE CHEAT: {The Cheat noises}

{Cut to a full-body shot of Bubs. He stops jumping jacks and his eyes grow wide.}

BUBS: Hot DOG!

{Bubs runs off leaving a cloud of smoke. Cut back to the Stand, where Bubs enters from the back and puts his hands on the counter. Cut to a closer shot of Bubs in the Stand.}

BUBS: What can I get? For you fine gentlemen?

{He rummages behind the counter and holds up various treats, including a bag of popcorn, a snowcone, a "BERSHEY" candy bar, a soft drink, small wrapped candies, and a "POO-BAR" candy bar. Cut to the wider shot of the Stand as Strong Mad and The Cheat walk away.}

BUBS: Oh... I'm such a dummy.

{He slumps in shame. Cut back to the Competition Area.}

THE ANNOUNCER: {through speakers} And so ends Day 2 of our competition with only THREE hot contestants left!

{As he says this, the camera pans up to the sky, and day changes to night.}

{A simple upbeat rhythm plays. Pom Pom's silhouette spins onscreen, with red text reading "Day 3", and grows to encompass the screen before shrinking to reveal a medium shot of Homestar jumping jacks and sweating at daytime.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: How you holding up, Pom Pom?

{Pan right to Pom Pom.}

POM POM: {bubbles}

{Pan back to Homestar.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: How 'bout you, Strong Bad?

{Pan left to Strong Mad wearing a Strong Bad mask.}

{Cut to a full view of the Competition Area. Strong Mad is now on stage in place of Strong Bad.}

STRONG MAD: I AM STRONG BAD!

{Cut to close-up of Pom Pom.}

POM POM: {frowns angrily, bubbles}

{Cut to a medium shot of Homestar.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: No way, Pom Pom, of course that's Strong Bad! {to Strong Mad} Ok, Strong Bad, are you Strong Bad?

{Cut to the full view.}

STRONG MAD: I AM STRONG BAD!

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {to Pom Pom} See?

{Cut to close-up of Pom Pom, who gives a disbelieving look on his face.}

{A silhouette of Strong Bad's mask, along with red text reading "Day 4", grows to cover the screen, and shrinks to reveal a side view of Homestar, who is looking rather tired. Pan right and zoom out during Homestar's line to reveal Pom Pom next to him.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {wearily} I don't know how much longer I can make it, Pom Pom.

{Cut to an extreme close-up of Strong Bad's mask bobbing up and down.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {off-screen} And Strong Bad's still looking good!

{Zoom out to reveal The Cheat wearing the Strong Bad Mask. Cut to a pool, where Strong Bad is lounging in a chair at the poolside with a radio and a glass of melonade. Music plays.}

STRONG BAD: Ah, let's see. I want to thank The Cheat for helping me to cheat—oh no, wait, I shouldn't say that. Let's try this again. I want to thank Strong Mad for helping me to cheat. There, that's better.

{Music stops. Strong Bad leans forward during the next line.}

THE ANNOUNCER: {through Strong Bad's radio} Homestar Runner is fading fast and could drop out at any moment!

STRONG BAD: {gets up} Ah, that's my cue! {exits to the right}

{Cut to a side view of the Competition Area. The Cheat is still in place of Strong Bad, and Homestar looks very weary.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: I give up, Pom Pom. I'm about to jump my last jack.

{Pom Pom, with a very angry look on his face, stops jumping jacks and walks over to The Cheat.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Pom Pom, what are you doing?!

{Cut to a close-up of The Cheat, where Pom Pom appears and overshadows him. Cut to The Cheat's view from inside the mask. Against The Cheat's refusals, Pom Pom reaches down and pulls off the mask. Cut to front view of The Cheat.}

BUBS: {off-screen} Hey, it's The Cheat!

{The Cheat grabs a Homestar Runner face cut-out from offscreen and puts it over his face, and then throws it away.}

BUBS: {off-screen} And it looks like he's cheating!

THE CHEAT: {The Cheat noises}

{Cut to a wide shot of Homestar Runner, who stops jumping jacks. A barber-shop style vocal arpeggio is heard, and the camera zooms in more and more to Homestar's face on each note.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: But if that's The Cheat, then where's Strong Bad?

{Cut to an empty field, where Strong Bad is walking to the right. The camera moves along with Strong Bad.}

STRONG BAD: {singing} Who is the guy that wins all the contests? That's me, Strong Bad. Except... maybe for that one contest. Or maybe more than one contest.

{Cut back to Homestar.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: There he is!

{Cut back to Strong Bad.}

STRONG BAD: {stops walking; annoyed} Oh! Holy... crap.

{Music plays. A trophy reading "What a Great Prize This Is." spins onscreen, approaching close to the camera, and the scene behind changes to a medium shot of Homestar. The trophy spins away from the camera to be held by Homestar.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Thanks, everybody, but this trophy really belongs to my best friend, Pom Pom.

{Strong Bad walks onscreen wearing a Pom Pom costume, and takes the trophy from Homestar.}

STRONG BAD: Hey, give me that! Uh, I mean — bubble, bubble-dee-bubble. Dubble Bubble.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: You said it, Pom Pom! We are best friends!

{Iris out to a grey screen with red text reading "the end". Music fades out.}

Fun Facts

Trivia

  • According to the DVD release, this toon is based on a story idea by Chad Eikhoff.
  • The music used in the intro credits is the "Rock" rhythm on the Casio SK-1 keyboard.
  • This is one of the earliest sightings of guns.
  • This is likely the earliest mention of Homestar Runner's pants.
  • This is also the earliest mention of peeing.
  • This is also the first time Homestar says seriously.

Remarks

  • This toon was removed in August 2003. According to Matt Chapman in the Club Aquatica interview, "['Marshmallow's Last Stand' and 'A Jumping Jack Contest'] will be back on someday. We can't disclose why they're off, it's a personal reason. If all goes well, they'll be back on the site; we'd like to have everything we've ever done on the site, and it sucks we had to take them off. They'll be back on someday."
  • This toon has a 2 in the URL.
  • Technically, because arm movements are an important part of jumping jacks, Homestar Runner doesn't do any, since he has no visible arms. He also doesn't move his feet correctly when he is full of melonades.
    • Strong Sad doesn't do any real jumping jacks either, instead only raising his arms and bouncing.
    • Since The Cheat doesn't have legs, he isn't doing jumping jacks correctly either.
  • Homestar rather obviously breaks the rules of the contest by stopping jumping when he drinks his first glass of melonade.
  • When Homestar says "I drank too many melonades," he says "drank" without his usual speech impediment.
  • Strong Bad has a belly button in this cartoon, but only during the scene by the pool.

Goofs

  • In the Strong Lib menu, Strong Bad's head is lower than it should be.
  • Much or all of this toon does not lip sync very well, especially towards the end. It appears the characters' mouth movements come about half of a second after they say the lines.
  • When Strong Bad tells The Cheat to "win [them] this competition", a corner of his mouth comes out of his head.
  • When Homestar's bladder is full, and he says to Pom Pom, "But do you think he can get here in time?", the shading on the red part of his hat changes each time he moves his mouth.
  • When the screen zooms out after Homestar pees, he can still be heard moaning, even though his mouth is closed.
  • In one transition scene from day to night, a star can clearly be seen in the black part of the crescent moon. This shouldn't be, for it would be blocked by the unseen area of the moon.
  • During the scene with Strong Bad at the pool, some of the tiles that are covered by the waves in the pool can be seen below the water line.
  • When Strong Bad is lying in his pool chair, his reflection is not seen underneath it.
  • When Homestar looks down and says, "I give up, Pom Pom", it appears his head is sliding a little bit down his shirt.

Glitches

  • After the Strong Lib has been filled out, the text can be highlighted and changed—including the text that wasn't affected by the choices before.

Inside References

  • Homestar's line, "I drank too many melonades", is a reference to Marshmallow's Last Stand, in which he says the same thing about eating too many marshmallows.
  • Pom Pom "uncovers that Cheat", repaying the favor from the original book. Homestar offers to share the trophy with Pom Pom, also repaying the favor.
  • When Strong Bad mentions the contests he didn't win, he could be referring to the Strongest Man in the World Contest, the wrestling match in Marshmallow's Last Stand, or the Reddest Radish contest.
  • Homestar wins a trophy for first place in the contest.

Real-World References

  • When Bubs holds up his snacks, one is called Bershey, a play on the popular Hershey bars.
  • Dubble Bubble is a brand of bubble gum.

Fast Forward

  • On the "Learn to Speak The Cheat" record in the Strong Bad Email cheat talk, one of the phrases is "Hey Homestar, would you like 147 glasses of melonade?", and the Cheat-speak equivalent is the sound he makes when offering Homestar the melonade in this cartoon.
  • In the Strong Bad Email some kinda robot, Strong Bad sings, "Who's the guy that checks all those emails? That's me Strong Bad!", which is a reference to the song he sings in this cartoon.
  • In the toon Strong Bad Sings, one of his songs is titled "Who's the guy that wins all the contests?"
  • Homestar drinks too many Melonades again in The Luau.
  • Bubs's movements when he does jumping jacks, warms up before the contest, and looks at the line at his stand are all settings in the game Dancin' Bubs.
  • One of the scenes from this toon is exaggerated in Exaggerations.
  • In No Hands On Deck, Homestar says that he hasn't talked about melonade in a while, and then his head changes to its design from this toon.
  • Strong Bad actually thanks The Cheat for helping him to cheat in Halloween Awards Show.
  • The back of Bubs' Concession Stand from this toon reappears in original. Later, Crack Stuntman says Bubs's line, "What can I get for you fine gentlemen?".
  • In Most in the Graveyard, when Homestar and Pom Pom are behind the gravestone with the Carnivorous Undead Sheep approaching, Homestar repeats his line "Seriously, Pom Pom, I'm about to pee my pants".

DVD Version

  • The Strong Lib game has been removed.
  • The audio quality goes back and forth between higher and lower quality. Usually, it's the higher quality.

External Links

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