Teen Girl Squad Issue 8
From Homestar Runner Wiki
The girls join the Battle of the Bands.
Cast (in order of appearance): Cheerleader, So and So, What's Her Face, The Ugly One, Tompkins, Mrs. So-and-so-erson, Pom Pom, Robot Teacher, Strong Bad (easter egg)
Page Title: Soopa Groop
Date: January 17, 2005
Contents |
Transcript
NARRATOR STRONG BAD: Teen Girl Squad! Cheerleader! {top 40 hits!} So and So! {hooked on classics!} What's Her Face! {college radio!} The Ugly One! {listens to pine bark!}
{the girls are sitting at their desks in class. What's Her Face's desk has no legs.}
INTERCOM: And lunch today will be a breadtangle of pizza. Don't forget the battle of the bands this Friday. Thompkins, point your rear end in the direction of the principal's office.
THOMPKINS: {offscreen} Awww, peas!
CHEERLEADER: Y'hear that girls??
WHAT'S HER FACE: Pizza belongs in a triangle!
SO AND SO: That Thompkins is SUCH a renegade!
CHEERLEADER: {strongly edited to have a derby, sunglasses, a moustache, a tie, and a cigar} No yous guys! The battle of the bands! {back to normal} We can form a band and become...
ALL: WORLDWIDE STARLETS!!
THE UGLY ONE: Worldwide starlets get much boys!
CHEERLEADER: Or so I have read. Obviously, I'll sing and pretend to play guitar.
WHAT'S HER FACE: Can I not get stuck playing bass?
CHEERLEADER, SO AND SO and THE UGLY ONE: NO WAY!!
SO AND SO: We'll be called "Smartly Pretty".
{we are shown a CD case with Smartly Pretty in a math-like style on it}
CHEERLEADER: {shown vomiting} Augh! Bleh! Ewww! Grugh! No. We're called "Kissy Boots"!
{we are now shown a CD case with Kissy Boots on it, and a huge pair of lips with cowboy boots}
SO AND SO: We can practice after school in my step-mom's walk-in closet!
{we are shown an image of a man carrying a rock that reads "after school"}
NARRATOR STRONG BAD: After school!
{the girls are in So And So's step-mom's closet, as evidenced by a rack of clothes off to the side}
CHEERLEADER: Your stepmom has questionable taste.
WHAT'S HER FACE: And like a million jogging suits.
{Mrs. So-and-so-erson suddenly appears. "She" is The Man with the Huge Mouth in drag.}
MRS. SO-AND-SO-ERSON: YOU LITTLE BRATS BEST SHUT YER YAPS!!!
CHEERLEADER: Yes Mrs. So-and-so... -erson.
{Mrs. So-and-so-erson vanishes. The girls' instruments appear.}
SO AND SO: Count us off, The Ugly One.
THE UGLY ONE: One, two, three and a four.
CHEERLEADER: {singing as the other girls play} Ooncha ooncha! One, two, three-cha! We're Kissy Boots and it's nice to meetcha! Ooncha ooncha! One, two, three-cha! Gonna get a breadtangle of pizza!
THE UGLY ONE: 16 hour drum solo!
{she starts playing the drums and scatting along, until a huge drum with teeth eats her}
NARRATOR STRONG BAD: FLOOR TOMMED!!!! {Mrs. So-and-so-erson returns and pours "Ranch Dress" over The Ugly One} STEP-MOMMED!!! {The Ugly One - with the drum still on her head - is put next to a table with a bad drawing of Pom Pom} POM-POMMED??
{The scene switches to a huge mouth with "BATTLE OF THE BANDS!!!" drawn on them.}
NARRATOR STRONG BAD: BATTLE OF THE BANDS!!!
{Now we move to the school's auditorium}
ROBOT TEACHER: Alright, give it up for "Fatty's Big Chance."
{A man that can only be Fatty appears with a saxophone.}
FATTY: Pick it up! Pick it up! Hup! Hup! Pick it up! Pick it up!
{Fatty vanishes}
ROBOT TEACHER: Next up is "Kissyboots".
{cut to Cheerleader and What's Her Face}
CHEERLEADER: Where is So and So? We can't play the hits without her!
{cut to So and So with dyed black hair and an all-black outfit with Strong Sad's face on it}
SO AND SO: I'm going with that gloomy keyboardist look I keep hearing about!
{some trolls appear}
TROLL: KRA'AGH! KLEET'OH BRANGH CHE'EKOH TAGHQ?
SO AND SO: My autograph? Why sure!
{a huge twenty-sided die lands on her}
NARRATOR STRONG BAD: TWELVE SIDED DIED!! {not in speech bubble} Whoa, that's a lot.
{back in the auditorium, Cheerleader and What's Her Face are the only ones on stage}
CHEERLEADER: I'm Kissyboots and she plays bass. One, two, three, and a four!
{they start playing. What's Her Face's guitar suddenly turns into a shark}
WHAT'S HER FACE: My bass feels seaworthy.
{the shark eats the entire upper half of What's Her Face in one JGHOWMP!}
WHAT'S HER FACE: OW! My most of me!!
CHEERLEADER: {indicating the shark} Dis my new backup band... a shark. One, two, three, and a four!
{cut to the IT'S OVER! screen}
CHEERLEADER: It's over! It's over! Strong Bad says it's over! It's over! It's over! Everybody died 'cept me!! {a chomping sound is heard. Not in a speech bubble:} Aw, crap!
Easter Eggs
- At the end, click the "o" to see a breadtangle, breadpazoid, breadallelogram, and brhombus of pizza (click each one to see the next. Click the brhombus to go back to the IT'S OVER! screen.)
- Click the "!" to see what happened to Thompkins.
Transcript
{Thompkins and Strong Bad are sitting in the principal's office. Strong Bad has a sign on his desk reading "PRINICPAL" [sic]}
THOMPKINS: Aw, come on prinicpal Strong Bad. I only stole ONE Sega tape!
STRONG BAD: That's just it, Thompkins... You could have stolen UPWARDS of one Sega tape.
THOMPKINS: Awww PEAS!
STRONG BAD: Kid, I think youre gonna turn out... HGHJHGHAAAALL right!
Fun Facts
Trivia
- This is the only Teen Girl Squad issue to date where all four girls clearly die.
- This is the first appearance of a main character other than Strong Bad (namely, Pom Pom) appearing in a Teen Girl Squad issue. (What about Cheat Commandos?)
- This is the only Teen Girl Squad issue to date with no appearance of the man with the big mouth, unless you count Mrs. So-and-so-erson.
- The die that crushes So And So is a 20-sided die. Twelve-sided dice have pentagonal faces.
Inside References
- "Ooncha ooncha one, two, three-cha" is from Teen Girl Squad Issue 7.
- Sega tapes are also mentioned in anything.
- Strong Bad is called a "prinicpal" (note the misspelling) by his nameplate and Thompkins, just like in the Homestar Quiz and CGNU.
- The "-erson" tacked onto Mrs So and So's name is done the same way that it was tacked onto Mrs Commander's name in Teeny Tiny Girl Squad.
Real-World References
- Cheerleader's guitar is a reference to Future Retro, a video by Animusic that features a similar guitar.
- Cheerleader's line "Obviously, I'll sing and pretend to play guitar." is a joke on singers like Avril Lavigne, who stress that they play guitar but then don't really know how.
External Links
| Teen Girl Squad | |
|---|---|
| Characters | Main: Cheerleader, So and So, What's Her Face, The Ugly One Gregs: Sci-Fi Greg, D n' D Greg, Open Source Greg, Japanese Culture Greg Minor: Arrow'd Guy, The Birds, Brainkrieg, Fighting Growlbacks, Manolios, Mr. Pitters, Mrs. Commanderson, Olympic Man and Coach, Peacey P, Quarterman, she likes cloth, Thomas, Tompkins |
| Issues | Main: Issue 1, Issue 2, Issue 3, Issue 4, Issue 5, Issue 6, Issue 7, Issue 8, Issue 8½, Issue 9, Issue 10, Issue 11, Issue 12, Issue 13, Issue 14, Issue 15 SBCG4AP: Homestar Ruiner, Cave Girl Squad, Teen Girl Squad Meets Limozeen Toons: 4 Gregs, Decomposing Pumpkins |
| Miscellaneous | Locations, Costumes, Theme Song, Fangs, -'d, Ow! My X!, Captioned Transitions |
| Other | Teen Girl Squad Deaths, 404'd, Neon 404'd, Teen Girl Squadcast |
