Homestar Runner Wiki - User contributions [en]

yes, wrestling

2007-12-03T20:20:21Z

Spongemaster0:

{{sbenav|183}}
[[Image:yes, wrestling.png|thumb|"Never before had two chairs and a potted plant so transformed the wrestling ring!"]]
Strong Bad demonstrates various costumes and gimmicks from his wrestling career.

'''Cast (in order of appearance):''' {{Film|Strong Bad}}, {{Film|Strong Sad}}, {{Film|The King of Town}}, {{Film|Homestar Runner}}, {{Film|The Announcer}}, {{Film|Strong Mad}}, {{Film|The Cheat}}, Gary the Legend

'''Places:''' [[Computer Room]], [[Gymnasium]], [[The Field]] (Easter egg)

{{Comp|Lappy 486}}

'''Date:''' Tuesday, November 27, 2007

'''Running Time:''' 4:41

'''Page Title:''' Lappy 486

==Transcript==
'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{singing}'' Emailin' from the left and to the right, emailin' on a Tuuuuesday night!

<blockquote class="lappy email">
<div>subject: none</div>
Dear awesome Strong Bad.<br />
Could you please show us some of your awesome wrestling<br />
moves.<br/>
Gardenboy<br />
Bfn SA<br />
</blockquote>

''{After "Strong Bad", Strong Bad says "Period. That's the best sentence ever written!" He reads the location as "Best friends never, South Africa".}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{typing}'' Well Gardenboy, as a crafty ring veteran, I can let you in on a little secret: being an awesome wrestler has nothing to do with awesome wrestling moves! ''{clears screen}'' It's all about awesome costumes, gimmicks, and dinosaur tranquilizer fueled ranting and raving! I got my first big break with cable access's longest named wrestling organization: All World Mid-Pro Shirtless Championship Entertainment, or AWMPSCE. ''{pronounces "OMP-skee"}'' Of course, they wanted me to be one of those lame masked wrestlers at first, but I had gimmickier plans.

''{Cut to a photograph of Strong Bad wearing a crown and a wrestling suit that has a crown printed on it. The picture is labeled "Sir Boliver Turnbuckle".}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' Sir Boliver Turnbuckle and his signature move:

''{Another picture appears with Strong Bad in his Turnbuckle outfit standing behind Strong Sad, with Strong Bad's arm grabbing Strong Sad below his own arm. The picture is labeled "Master of the 1/8th Nelson!"}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' The one-eighth nelson!

''{Cut back to the Lappy}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{typing}'' That was back in the days when pretending to be a pompous Brit was considered a ''premium'' gimmick. Once I started getting more popular, my next incarnation was

''{Cut to the Gymatorium's doors. A piece of paper with an AWMPSCE logo is taped on sideways.}''

'''THE ANNOUNCER:''' ''{voiceover}'' And hailing from the age of exploration, the namer of nations,

''{The doors swing open. Strong Bad is posing behind them. He is wearing an orange beret, a frilly white shirt, and a brown vest. The words "il Cartographer" appear at the bottom of the screen.}''

'''THE ANNOUNCER:''' il Cartographer!

''{Strong Bad poses as though he's expecting applause, but all that can be heard are some singers and the King of Town.}''

'''THE KING OF TOWN:''' ''{from offscreen}'' Booooooo!

'''BACKING SINGERS:''' il Cartographer!

'''LEAD SINGER:''' He makin' the maps!

'''BACKING SINGERS:''' il Cartographer!

'''LEAD SINGER:''' He takin' no crap!

''{Strong Bad steps forward and throws pieces of paper at the empty seats.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' And one of my gimmicks was that I'd always come into the ring throwing—

''{One of Strong Bad's papers stops in front of the camera. It is a map of the Gymatorium and shows the way from one of the seats ("here be you") to "the can", as the toilet is labeled. The map is labeled "Ye Olde Restroom Trail".}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' maps to the restrooms into the crowd!

''{Cut to the ring; Strong Bad is holding a flag.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' I claim-a this saggy ring in the name of il Cartographer!

''{He taps the flag and it unfurls itself and flaps in imaginary wind, showing an image of Strong Bad's beret with "the il-est" written below it.}''

'''THE KING OF TOWN:''' ''{from offscreen}'' Booooo!

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' That was back when my big feud with Homestar Runner was in full swing!

''{Cut to a closeup of Homestar Runner's torso. He is wearing red pants that read "'EM UP!" in bold white lettering and has cinnamon on his chest. The screen slowly pans back.}''

'''THE ANNOUNCER:''' ''{from offscreen}'' Ladies and gentlemen! Joining me backstage in historic empty high school gymnasium—

''{The Announcer can now be seen standing next to Homestar, who is facing away from the camera.}''

'''THE ANNOUNCER:''' is a man that needs no introduction. Introducing: The Jack 'Em Up Kid!

''{The words "The Jack 'Em Up Kid" appear at the bottom of the screen. Homestar turns toward the camera. His chest has what appears to be cinnamon "stubble" on it, and his hat has no propeller.}''

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' Well, you know, announcer man, that's right! Hoo, yeah! Jack 'Em Up Kid, empty high school gymnasium, ''{holds up a belt with bacon and eggs carved into the buckle}'' sizzleweight belt on the line! Hoo, yeah! That's right! That's correct! That's precisely what I'm talking about! I got the drive, I got the commotion! I can't believe it! Hoo, yeah! el Photographer, whatchoo gonna did? ''{raises his pants on each word}'' When you get jacked up? ''{snaps the elastic band, which muffles his speech}'' By the Jack 'Em Up Kid!

'''{Cut back to the Lappy}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{typing}'' And that feud carried over into my tag team phase with Strong Mad. Naturally, there were several misfires before we found our groove.

''{Cut to Strong Bad and Strong Mad dressed like tourists. Strong Mad is wearing a purple Hawaiian shirt, while Strong Bad wears a pair of sunglasses and has sunscreen smeared over his nonexistent nose. Both wear fishing hats and cameras.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Nothing can stop the Wild Vacationers!

''{"The Wild Vacationers" appears at the bottom of the screen. With a blip, the scene cuts to Strong Bad and Strong Mad in black spandex outfits. Strong Bad is wearing a headband with a big knife tucked into it, and his pants have a wooden board, a wrench, and one other unidentifiable object in them. Strong Mad has a razor blade lodged in his bleeding and apparently scarred forehead, a hammer tucked into his singlet, and the outline of a gun fully inside his singlet. A chainsaw blade can be seen behind him.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' You betta not mess with the Foreign Object Brothers!

''{"The Foreign Object Bros." appears at the bottom of the screen. With a blip, the scene cuts to Strong Bad and Strong Mad wearing spiky shoulder pads. Strong Mad's singlet is red and has "RAX" written on it. Strong Bad wears a green mohawk.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Rax and Arby: The Sanctum of Spiky Shoulder Pads.

''{"The Sanctum of Spiky Shoulder Pads" appears at the bottom of the screen. With a blip, it cuts to the Announcer.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' But we finally settled on...

''{The screen pans over to Strong Bad and Strong Mad with heavy facepaint. Strong Mad's singlet reads "FACEPAINT CONNECTION".}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' The Facepaint Connection! Jack 'Em Up Kid, Gary the Legend, when we step into the ring with the insidious Mr. Cheatayama,

''{Pans over to show The Cheat with a bowler derby and facepaint that resembles a mustache and goatee. He is holding an egg beater. It pans back after a moment.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' You better hope for your guts and your mercy ''{looks confused for a moment}'' can save you at this Sunday's PayPerViewver Series.

''{"PayPerViewver Series - Sunday 9PM" appears at the bottom of the screen.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' I didn't climb the mountains and breathe the facepainted fumes just to let you two walk away with the title I'm done take me off the air! ''{frantically}'' TAKE ME OFF THE AIR!!!

''{Static cuts to Homestar, still in his Jack 'Em Up Kid outfit, holding a microphone.}''

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' Hoo, yeah! That's right! Facepaint Connection! You can't resist the power of all the screamin' Jack 'Emites and Jack 'Emettes out there when I pin you to the ground for a count of three which is a legal way to win a match in this wrestling federation the last time I checked. Gary the Legend, take it away!

''{He holds the microphone out to his partner. The screen cuts back, revealing that there is nobody there.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' Oh, yeah, I forgot to mention that Gary the Legend was Homestar's ''imaginary'' tag team partner.

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' ''{to "Gary"}'' You tell 'em! You tell 'em, Gary! Hoo, yeah!

''{Cut back to the Lappy.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{typing}'' Eventually I began wrestling as my own dang self and finally achieved what every wrestler strives for: my own in-ring interview segment! Never before had two chairs and a potted plant so transformed the wrestling ring!

''{Cut to the Gymatorium.}''

'''THE ANNOUNCER:''' ''{from offscreen}'' It's time for another installment of—

''{The words "Strong Bad's Folding Chair DUNGEON" appear onscreen. The word "DUNGEON" drips blood.}''

'''THE ANNOUNCER:''' ''{from offscreen}'' Strong Bad's Folding Chair Dungeon!

''{Cut to the ring, where Strong Bad can be seen with a microphone. Behind him is a table with a potted plant and a skull on it, with two folding chairs next to it. A red rug sits underneath it all.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Welcome back to the darkest dankest regions of my dungeon! My prisoner this week is the current fizzleweight belt holder: The Jack 'Em Up Kid!

''{Homestar, still in costume, jumps into the ring.}''

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' Hoo, yeah! Hoo, yeah!

''{Strong Bad hits him with one of the folding chairs, knocking him out. Cut back to the Lappy.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{typing}'' So you see Gardenboy, you should stop trying to perfect the Summer Squash Suplex and instead get yourself a rake, a straw hat, maybe a watering can and start screaming about how your opponents are gophers!

''{Cut to the Gymatorium's doors. Singing can be heard in the background. The doors open to reveal Strong Sad with a hat, rake, and watering can.}''

'''BACKING SINGERS:''' Gardenboy!

'''LEAD SINGER:''' He's plantin' the seeds!

'''BACKING SINGERS:''' Gardenboy!

'''LEAD SINGER:''' He's pullin' out the weeds!

'''BACKING SINGERS:''' Gardenboy!

'''LEAD SINGER:''' He's gonna bring ya to your knees!

'''BACKING SINGERS:''' He's the il Cartographer, I mean, Gardenboy!

'''STRONG SAD:''' All right, all you gophers out there, ha-bring-it-on!

''{He holds up the watering can, which spouts two flames. [[New Paper]] comes down.}''

==Easter Eggs==
[[Image:Jack 'Em T-shirts.png|thumb|What you gone did when you get jacked up?]]
*While Homestar is taunting The Facepaint Connection, click on the "S" in the [[AWMPSCE]] logo to see [[T-shirts]], a bumper sticker, and a foam thumb promoting the Jack 'Em Up Kid.
*At the end, click on Strong Sad's hat to see the Announcer interviewing Strong Mad:
*:'''THE ANNOUNCER:''' And Rax, anything you'd care to add?
*:'''STRONG MAD:''' BEEF AND CHEDDAR! FIVE FOR FIVE!
*At the end, click on Strong Sad's watering can to see a scene with Homestar and the Brothers Strong in the [[Halloween|Field at night]] as il Cartographer, a Facepaint Connection member, Gardenboy, and The Jack 'Em Up Kid.
*:'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' Hey, Strong Bad. I really like your Rudy from ''Fat Albert'' costume.

==Fun Facts==
===Explanations===
*"Bfn" stands for "[[Wikipedia:Bloemfontein|Bloemfontein]]", one of South Africa's three capital cities.
**Strong Bad reads it as "best friends never," which is a play off of the acronym "BFF," meaning "Best friends forever."
*The "1/8 nelson" is not a wrestling hold, but the half-nelson and three-quarter [[wikipedia:Nelson hold|nelson]] are amateur wrestling holds designed to get a quick pinfall, and the full nelson (which is illegal in NCAA wrestling) is a famous submission hold in the professional ranks.
* Strong Bad hitting Homestar Runner with a steel chair refers to the common practice of faking the use of weapons, particularly folding chairs, in professional wrestling.
*A [[Wikipedia:cartographer|cartographer]] is a mapmaker.
*"Il Cartographer" literally means "he cartographer" or "it cartographer" in French.

===Trivia===
*This sbemail was released Tuesday night instead of the usual Monday morning, as Strong Bad points out in his opening song.
*This is the first time that Homestar's body under the neckline is shown uncensored.
*Homestar's hat doesn't have its propeller.

===Remarks===
*"Gymatorium" is a [[portmanteau]] of gymnasium and auditorium.
*The All World Mid-Pro Shirtless Championship Entertainment has a lot of shirt-wearing wrestlers. il Cartographer, in particular, is not only wearing a frilly shirt but a fine leather vest.

===Goofs===
*il Cartographer's hat does not move in sync with his head.
*When Strong Bad puts up his "il-est" flag, the floor reads "AWMPSE" instead of "AWMPSCE."
*The "e" in the second "before" is slightly cut off on the right side.

===Fixed Goofs===
*Initially, when Strong Bad says "dinosaur tranquilizer fueled ranting and raving", "fueled" was misspelled on the computer screen as "feuled". This was fixed the next day.

===Wrestling References===
*The Cheat's character is based on famous wrestling manager "[[Wikipedia:Harry Fujiwara|Mr. Fuji]]".
*Strong Bad's interview segment is based on many wrestlers having interviews segments (most famously [[Wikipedia:Roddy Piper|Roddy Piper]]'s [[Wikipedia:Piper's Pit|Piper's Pit]]") mid-show.
*"Pay-per-viewver Series" refers to [[Wikipedia:Survivor Series|Survivor Series]], a [[Wikipedia:World Wrestling Entertainment|WWE]] pay-per-view event.
*The Sanctum of Spiky Shoulder Pads is a reference to the [[Wikipedia:Road Warriors|Road Warriors]] tag team (aka the Legion of Doom), who became famous for their shoulder pads covered in spikes.
*As a member of The Foreign Object Brothers, Strong Mad has a sledgehammer hidden in his tights. This is a refernce to [[Wikipedia:Triple H|Triple H]] who uses such a hammer as a trademark foreign object.
*The Wild Vacationers is a reference to the [[Wikipedia:Wild Samoans|Wild Samoans]] tag team who were managed by [[Wikipedia:Lou Albano|Captain Lou Albano]]. Albano would often wear a Hawaiian shirt to the ring, much like the Vacationers.
*The Facepaint Connection is a reference to the [[Wikipedia:Blade Runners|Blade Runners]], a tag team in Bill Watts' old [[Wikipedia:Universal Wrestling Federation (Bill Watts)|UWF]]. Both of its members would become icons, Sting and the Ultimate Warrior.
*Homestar's quote, "Whatchoo gonna did, when you get jacked up by the Jack 'Em Up Kid?" is a twist of [[Wikipedia:Hulk Hogan|Hulk Hogan]]'s famous interview-ending catchphrase, "Whatcha gonna do when Hulkamania runs wild on you?!" In addition, beginning "Well you know, announcer man..." is similar to Hogan's famous interview opening, "Well ya know something, Mean Gene...", addressed to long-time wrestling personality [[Wikipedia:Gene Okerlund|"Mean" Gene Okerlund]]. Homestar also talks about his Jackemites, similar to the Hogan's hulkamaniacs.
*Homestar's frequent use of the phrase "Hoo yeah!" is a reference to [[Wikipedia:Randy Savage|Macho Man Randy Savage]], whose famous catchphrase was "Oooh yeah!"
*The razor blade lodged in Strong Mad's forehead as part of his costume as a Foreign Objects Brother references [[Wikipedia:Blading (professional wrestling)|blading]], the method that professional wrestlers use to make themselves bleed mid-match. Blading involves using a razor blade like Strong Mad's to surreptitiously cut oneself mid-match so that nobody notices that the cut is self-inflicted. Many older wrestlers have noticeable scar tissue on their forehead (much like Strong Mad does in the clip) from blading hundreds of times in their careers.
*Strong Bad saying, "TAKE ME OFF THE AIR!!!" is a reference to a [[Wikipedia:Paul Heyman|Paul Heyman]] shoot promo from an episode of ''[[Wikipedia:ECW on TNN|ECW on TNN]]'' in 2000.
*"Dinosaur tranquilizer fueled ranting and raving" is a reference to an event that happened on the television show ''[[Wikipedia:WWE Friday Night SmackDown!|SmackDown!]]'' in February 2005, when then-champion [[Wikipedia:John Layfield|John Bradshaw Layfield]] was shot with a [[Wikipedia:Tranquilizer dart|tranquilizer dart]] and went into a rant with an inflatable dinosaur in front of a Tokyo crowd.
* Strong Bad's interview talking about The Jack 'Em Up Kid is a twist on an [[Wikipedia:Ultimate Warrior|Ultimate Warrior]] interview, which were, more often than not, nonsensical.
* Strong Bad's comment of "That was back in the days when pretending to be a pompous Brit was considered a premium gimmick" relates to wrestlers such as the "Lord" Steven Regal ([[Wikipedia:Darren Matthews|William Regal]]), [[Wikipedia:Dave Taylor (wrestler)|"Squire" Dave Taylor]] and [[Wikipedia:Bobby Eaton|"Earl" Bobby Eaton]] ([[Wikipedia:The Blue Bloods|The Blue Bloods]]), as well as a reference to other wrestlers who falsify their claim to British royalty.
* The "Entertainment" in AWMPSCE is a reference to WWE, World Wrestling Entertainment, who changed their name in 2002 from the World Wrestling Federation, or WWF, in response to a cease-and-desist order from the [[Wikipedia:World Wide Fund For Nature|World Wide Fund For Nature]], formerly the World Wildlife Fund, who used the same initials.
* Gary the Legend is a reference to wrestler and commentator "Larry The Legend," also known as [[Wikipedia: Larry Zbyszko|Larry "The Living Legend" Zbyszko]].

===Inside References===
*The subject of this email is [[professional wrestling]].
*Homestar Runner, as The Jack 'Em Up Kid, has a wrestling belt with an image of [[bacon]] and [[eggs]].
*Homestar is wearing what could be described as a form of [[long pants]].
*Strong Bad, as il Cartographer, wears an orange [[beret]].
*The Easter egg for clicking on the watering can is a reference to the ending of most [[Halloween]] cartoons, including the [[What are you supposed to be?|inability to recognize Strong Bad's costume]].
*The Cheat, as the Insidious Mr. Cheatayama, wears a black [[bowler hat]].
*As a Foreign Object Brother, Strong Mad has a razor stuck in his forehead, which is causing him to [[blood|bleed]]. Also, in "Strong Bad's Folding Chair DUNGEON", the word "DUNGEON" is dripping with blood.
*At the end of the email, Strong Sad's watering can inexplicably spurts [[fire]].
*The singers for Strong Sad's entrance music are the same singers for the [[Thnikkaman]]'s theme song. A voice similar to [[Crackotage]]'s can be heard among the singers.
*The scoreboard shows an [[Scoreboard#Irregular Scores|irregular score]] of "?" for the Home team, and viewing the Flash file reveals the other score to be "$", both seen in [[the paper]].
*Homestar has [[cinnamon]] on his chest.
*The King of Town is heard [[The King of Town Booing|booing]].
*Strong Bad's wrestling Homestar, as well as Strong Mad being his tag team partner, are both allusions to [[Marshmallow's Last Stand]].
*As one of the Foreign Objects Brothers, Strong Bad has a [[big knife]] tucked in his [[headband]].

===Real-World References===
*Strong Bad and Strong Mad as Arby and Rax refers to restaurants [[Wikipedia:Arby's|Arby's]] and [[Wikipedia:Rax (restaurant)|Rax]], both of which specialize in roast beef sandwiches.
**A "Beef 'n Cheddar" is a sandwich available at Arby's restaurants. The sandwiches are periodically sold "Five for $5."
*[[Wikipedia:Fat Albert and the Cosby Kids|Fat Albert and Rudy]] were 1970s cartoon characters created and hosted by [[Bill Cosby]], based on his stand-up comedy routine.
*Homestar's theme song as a wrestler is a slowed-down version of the main theme from [[Wikipedia:Mike Tyson's Punch-Out!!|Punch-Out!!]] for the [[Nintendo|Nintendo Entertainment System]].
* Homestar's "'Em Up" phrase on his shirt is somewhat similar to the catchphrase "Man Up", used by the [[Wikipedia:Briscoe Brothers|Briscoe Brothers]]

===Fast Forward===
*A "fanimaton" was posted on the [[Weekly Fanstuff 2007#WF-2007-11-29|Weekly Fanstuff]] on November 29th, 2007, featuring [[Reynold]] as Gardenboy.

==External Links==
{{sbemailextlinks|183|12999}}

{{Strong Bad Email}}

pizza joint

2007-10-01T19:50:55Z

Spongemaster0: /* Fast Forward */

{{sbenav|179}}
[[Image:SBemail179.PNG|thumb|200px|"Um, The Pizz? Thanks for calling?"]]

To attract girls, Strong Bad "opens" a pizza joint, which accidentally becomes a success.

'''Cast (in order of appearance):''' {{film|Strong Bad}}, {{film|The Cheat}}, [[Minor Teen Girl Squad Characters#Daphne|Daphne]], {{film|Cheerleader}}, {{film|So and So}}, {{film|What's Her Face}}, {{film|The Ugly One}}, {{film|Homestar Runner}}, {{film|The King of Town}}, {{film|Strong Sad}}

'''Places:''' [[Computer Room]], [[Strong Badia]], [[The King of Town's Castle]], [[The Pizz]], the [[Review Revue]], [[The King of Town's Grill]]

{{Comp|Lappy 486}}

'''Date:''' Monday, September 24, 2007

'''Running Time:''' 4:09

'''Page Title:''' Lappy 486

==Transcript==
'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{singing}'' Let a lil' email into your heart, and it'll clog your arteries!
<blockquote class="lappy email">
<div>subject: sbemails!!</div>
Hey there Strong Bad,<br>
As a typical college girl I was wondering if there is a<br>
pizza joint somewhere in Strongbadia...you know, if me and<br>
my girls wanted to come hang out sometime.<br>
Hopeful in Pennsylvania,<br>
Daphne
</blockquote>

''{Strong Bad gets more and more excited as he reads the last two lines}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' BLARG! ''{typing}'' Yes! We have a pizza joint! ''{Cut to the computer room; Strong Bad flails his arms wildly}'' I gots me a pizza joint! ''{Strong Bad falls off his chair and then flops off the screen}'' Always been at the pizza joint! Come to the pizza joint with me!

''{Screen-wipe to Strong Badia. Strong Bad is standing behind a cardboard box, on which The Cheat is busy writing "Strong Bad's Strong Badian PIZZ". They are surrounded by "Neighborhood Style" pizza boxes.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Hurry up with that sign, The Cheat!

'''THE CHEAT:''' ''{annoyed The Cheat noises}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{walks to the front}'' No, no, no, that's already way too long. We need something short and catchy that Daphne and her girls can say real quick. ''{cut to close-up of Strong Bad}'' You know, like, "The Max", or "The Emporium". It's never gonna work if they have to be like:

''{Cut to a Teen Girl Squad scene with the slower version of the TGS music. Cheerleader and So and So are wearing towels. What's Her Face is wearing her regular clothes. The Ugly One is dressed like a mummy in a sarcophagus. Daphne is there too, wearing a towel with "Daph" written on it.}''

'''DAPHNE:''' ''{slowly}'' Hey gals! Let's towel off and meet up at... ''{words appear on screen as they are said}'' Strong Bad's Strong Badian pi-

'''CHEERLEADER:''' ''{interrupting}'' This is taking too long!

'''WHAT'S HER FACE:''' I'm already bored!

'''SO AND SO:''' I'm going home!

'''THE UGLY ONE:''' I belong in a museum!

''{Cut back to Strong Bad and The Cheat}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' College girls don't have that kind of time, man. We gotta strike while the girl is still hot!

'''THE CHEAT:''' ''{exasperated The Cheat noises; he scribbles out "Strong Bad's Strong Badian" and writes "The" below it. The sign now reads "The Pizz"}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Yeah! The Pizz! I love it!

''{A silhouette of Homestar Runner's head enters the bottom-left corner. Cut to Homestar Runner}''

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' Umm, yeah. Lemme get a slice of p-roni, with some t-sauce, and ''{squinting}'' m-rooms.

''{Cut to a wide shot of Strong Badia}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Homestar, get outta here! We're not a real pizza place! This is just a front to meet some girls!

''{Cut to Homestar Runner}''

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' Ohhhhh. Lemme get a calzone, then. With, uh, p-loaf and m-cheese.

''{Cut back to Strong Badia. The phone rings}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' What the- Hang on a sec. ''{picks up a phone}'' Uhh... The Pizz? Thanks for calling?

'''THE KING OF TOWN:''' Yeah, lemme get about 50 ''{Homestar leaves to the left}'' Thanksgiving Lover's pizzas delivered to the only castle around here!

''{Cut to Strong Bad}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' King of Town? How did you even know about this place?

''{The screen splits to show the King of Town on the other end}''

'''THE KING OF TOWN:''' Well, if you ''must'' know, I spend most of my day calling random numbers in hopes of finding a new restaurant!

'''STRONG BAD:''' Well, we're not a real place. ''{footsteps offscreen}'' We're just a—

''{Cut back to Strong Badia. Homestar is standing next to Strong Bad, wearing a The Pizz shirt and hat. The Cheat, also wearing a hat, leaves to the right}''

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' ''{camera zooms in at a crooked angle after each sentence}'' Table 44 needs more breadsticks! The soccer team left without paying! And the delivery guy caught a flat!

'''STRONG BAD:''' What are you talking about? Weren't you just a customer?

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' Yeah, but The Cheat hired me for the lunch rush. I mean, hey! Somebody's gotta make that muh-ney! ''{runs off}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' This is all wrong! ''{cuts back to Strong Badia}'' The Cheat, in our effort to make a pretend pizza place in order to score some chicks, we somehow created a successful and well-reviewed actual pizza place!

''{Cut through static to Strong Sad standing in front of a sign that reads "Review Revue". Music plays}''

'''STRONG SAD:''' Rustic and filled with old-world cardboard charm, ''{the Pizz's logo rolls in from the bottom-right}'' the Pizz serves up Strong Badian-style pizza at a ''{points upwards}'' price that won't leave a dent in your wallet!

''{A green check mark and the text "pick!" appears with a "ding". Cut back through static to Strong Bad and The Cheat in Strong Badia}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Maybe we're going about this the wrong way, The Cheat. Girls don't wanna meet people in person anymore! They wanna meet 'em online!

''{Cut to a view of the Lappy 486 with a nondescript web browser open; the text "<nowiki>http://www.virtualpizz.biz</nowiki>" is typed into the location bar}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' Welcome to virtualpizz.biz!

''{The screen turns green. The "Virtualpizz.biz" logo and a button that says "login" appears, a cursor moves over the "login" button and clicks it. The screen changes to show a picture of a piece of pizza with eyes, arms and legs; to the left is a field containing the text "purseaddikt89", below which are buttons for "EYES", "HAIR", "MOUTH", "NOSE", "TOPPING" and "CRUST".}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Where typical college girls can customize their own slice of pizza for some serious social networking.

''{The cursor moves around and clicks the "eye" button twice, the "hair" button twice, the "nose" button three times and the "topping" button twice; the features in question change with each click. The screen then zooms in to show two slices of pizza in Strong Badia with Strong Bad. The lower left corner reads, "Pizz Points $500".}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' With me!

'''COMPUTERIZED STRONG BAD:''' ''{in a monotonous version of Strong Bad's voice, lines appear in orange bubbles above him}'' Sup, Ladies. Welcome to the Pizz!

'''SLICE OF PIZZA ON THE LEFT:''' ''{in a monotonous version of Homestar Runner's voice, lines appear in red bubbles above him}'' Hey man, can I get a slice of p-roni?

'''SLICE OF PIZZA ON THE RIGHT:''' ''{in a monotonous version of the King of Town's voice, lines appear in purple bubbles above him}'' I'd like to place a pick-up order.

'''COMPUTERIZED STRONG BAD:''' You're not Daphne, you're... pizza trolls! Flame war!!

''{Both slices of pizza catch fire and start running away}''

'''SLICE OF PIZZA ON THE RIGHT:''' It burns!

'''SLICE OF PIZZA ON THE LEFT:''' Ahhhhhhhh!

'''COMPUTERIZED STRONG BAD:''' Well, I guess I should spend all these Pizz points.

''{The number of Pizz points decreases and objects appear in Strong Badia: The arcade game and couch from the Basement and Homestar's dresser and cow lamp. The right fence is then painted like the Basement, the left pink with blue dots. As he does so, his $500 in Pizz Points drops with each item, eventually ending at "$-51". Cut through static to Strong Sad.}''

'''STRONG SAD:''' With a clunky UI and a played-out avatar system, Virtualpizz.biz ''{the Virtualpizz.biz logo enters from the bottom-right; Strong Sad points upwards}'' misses the mark!

''{A red X with text "Miss!" appears over the logo with a buzzer sound.}''

'''STRONG SAD:''' That, and every time I tried to add Strong Bad to my Pizz list, he'd call me Thelonious Dump!

''{Cut back through static to Strong Bad at the Lappy 486}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{typing}'' Well, I'm all outta ideas. I dunno how to get Daphne and her girls to come to my pizza joint.

'''THE CHEAT:''' ''{The Cheat noises}''

''{Zoom out to a view of The Cheat standing to the right of Strong Bad}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' What do you mean, they're at your pizza joint? What pizza joint? The Pizz has ''competition''?

'''THE CHEAT:''' ''{The Cheat noises; makes a beckoning motion with his arm}''

''{Cut to the King of Town's barbecue, which has "CHEATSA PIZZA" written on a strip of masking tape on it}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' That's your pizza joint.

''{Cut to show Strong Bad and The Cheat next to the barbecue}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Grill with some tape on it.

'''THE CHEAT:''' ''{smiles, affirming The Cheat noises}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Lemme see this.

''{Strong Bad opens the grill; balloons and confetti come out and high pitched, exciting voices are heard. Strong Bad looks surprised. Cut to a silhouette of the same scene as the balloons drift off-screen. Cut back to Strong Bad and The Cheat.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{covers barbecue again, cutting out the sound effects}'' The Cheat, this is amazing! Count me in! ''{sotto voce}'' Do you guys take Pizz points?

'''THE CHEAT:''' ''{affirming The Cheat noises}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Count me in!

''{Strong Bad opens the barbecue and jumps in; The Cheat follows him. The grill shuts behind him. The grill opens again and The Cheat partially emerges, looking dazed and covered in lipstick.}''

'''THE CHEAT:''' ''{The Cheat noises}''

''{The Cheat goes back into the barbecue and it shuts. The King of Town enters from the left carrying a lighter, a can of gasoline, a container of lighter fluid that reads "Lite em up Dan" and a bag of charcoal that reads "King of Town Charcoal!"}''

'''THE KING OF TOWN:''' Doo doo doot doot doo...

''{Cut back to the Lappy 486. The [[New Paper]] comes down.}''

==Easter Eggs==
*Click on "girls" at the end to see an extra scene with Strong Sad.
:''{Strong Sad at the Review Revue}''
:'''STRONG SAD:''' Strong Bad phones this one in with ''{pointing upwards}'' Strong Bad Email 179. ''{sbemail179.html slides at the bottom-right of the screen}'' Despite a strong showing from fan favorite Strong Sad, ''{slaps his stomach}'' the email ultimately fizzles due to a heavy reliance on what can only be called "internet pizza jokes". ''{a red X reading "MISS!" appears on top of sbemail179.html}''
*Click on "pizza joint" at the end to see an extra scene with Homestar.
:''{Homestar is dressed in his "The Pizz" uniform, dancing on a blue background}''
:'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' Party! Cheatsa Party!

==Fun Facts==
===Explanations===
*A [[wikipedia:Calzone|calzone]] consists of pizza toppings and ricotta or mozzarella cheese wrapped inside a large piece of pizza dough.
*A [[Wikipedia:Flaming (Internet)|flame war]] is a common message board term for a heated (and hateful) argument.
*A [[Wikipedia:Troll (Internet)|Troll]] is a common message board term used for people who flame other users and incite arguments and flame wars.
*"UI" stands for [[Wikipedia:User interface#User interfaces in computing|user interface]], the design of a program (or web page) and how users can interact with it.
*An [[Wikipedia:Avatar_(virtual_reality)|"avatar"]] is an Internet user's representation of himself or herself, in this case, a model used in the social networking site of Virtual Pizz.
*Strong Bad's "We gotta strike while the girl is still hot" is a play on the expression regarding needing to "strike while the iron is still hot".

===Trivia===
*[http://virtualpizz.biz www.virtualpizz.biz] is a real fan-created website that was registered about half an hour after this email debuted. The site features the login page from the email. An [[Easter egg]] (accessed by clicking on the dot in .biz) reveals a link to an [http://virtualpizz.biz/about.html about page].
*The [[Floppy Disk Container]] reads "[[Floppy Disk Container#D|D]]".
*This is the first email since the debut of New Paper not to end with a complaint about it from Strong Bad. This is also the first email with the New Paper printing out without any problems or setbacks.
*The bushes in The Field are rendered in a previously unseen style.
*The "Pizz Points" for each item are: $50 for [[TROGDOR!]] $150 for the [[Couch]], $50 for the stand, $1 for the [[Cow Lamp]], and $150 points for each wallpaper. The total Pizz Points for all items is $551 — leaving Strong Bad $51 in debt.
*This is another instance of [[Strong Sad smiling]], which occurs while he's reviewing The Pizz.

===Remarks===
*P-roni, t-sauce, m-rooms, p-loaf and m-cheese are examples of abbreviations that might be used around [[The Office]] (similar to [[Piemonade|p-nade]]).

===Goofs===
*Two black dots can be briefly seen below Homestar's eyes when he squints them.
*When the left slice of pizza enters the online world, the tire overlaps it.
*In the Strong Sad review Easter egg, part of the Sbemail179.html shadow is missing until Strong Sad pats his belly.

===Fixed Goofs===
*When this e-mail was first released, black dots flashed on Homestar's face when the camera zoomed in on him talking.

===Inside References===
*This email prominently features [[pizza]].
*Strong Bad complained about not getting emails from college girls in [[hygiene]].
*Strong Bad again says [[competition]].
*[[Credenza]] is seen in the background of the Review Revue.
*The background of the Review Revue is from [[pizzaz]].
*The King of Town uses "Light 'Em Up [[Dan]]" brand lighter fluid.
*The music playing on Review Revue is from [[portrait]].
*"Cheatsa parties" were previously mentioned in [[mile]], and Homestar's Easter egg dance is identical to the broken animation of a [[:Image:headlessdance.gif|headless Homestar dancing]] found at the end of the Flash file. This may be a clue that the Easter egg was originally going to be used in "mile" when you clicked on "pizza parties", but was later replaced.
*The sides of the pizza boxes read "Pizza Box" / "Neighborhood [[Style]]".
*Strong Sad acknowledges he is in a sbemail and points to the URL bar, which is a [[fourth wall break]].
**In addition, the URL appearing on the screen also breaks the fourth wall.
*The "CHEATSA PiZZA" sign is a use of [[lowercase i's]].
*Strong Bad pulling a phone out of nowhere, as well as a pizza place being inside the King of Town's grill, are instances of [[Hammerspace]].

===Real-World References===
* The Emporium is a reference to the movie [[Wikipedia:Dazed and Confused (film)|Dazed and Confused]].
*The Max, one of Strong Bad's examples for shorter names, is the name of the real life company [http://www.themax.com/ The MAX]. The Max is most commonly known for foodservice delivery to schools. It is owned by [[wikipedia:ConAgra Foods|ConAgra Foods]].
*The King of Town ordering "Thanksgiving Lovers" pizzas is a reference to pizza shops that sell "Meat Lovers" or "Veggie Lovers" pizzas, particularly [[Wikipedia:Pizza Hut|Pizza Hut]].
*VirtualPizz.biz spoofs commercial social massively multi-player online games such as [[Wikipedia:Habbo Hotel|Habbo Hotel]], [[Wikipedia:Club Penguin|Club Penguin]], and [[Wikipedia:Coke Music| Coke Music]].
*Homestar's Easter egg song is based on a commercial for the [http://www.inthe80s.com/toys/pizzaparty.shtml Pizza Party] board game.
*Strong Bad's nickname for Strong Sad, "Thelonious [[Dump]]", is a reference to famous jazz pianist [[wikipedia:Thelonious Monk|Thelonious Monk]].

===Fast Forward===
*A 'Slumber Party Style' Pizza Box from the Pizz is shown in [[slumber party]].
**Homestar would also sing the "Cheatsa Party" song, replacing cheatsa with slumber in slumber party

==External Links==
{{sbemailextlinks|179|12517}}

{{Strong Bad Email}}

Talk:DNA Evidence (running gag)

2007-04-11T12:03:00Z

Spongemaster0: /**/Who Died?

{{talk}}
Is there gonna be some kinda cryptic sub-plot behind this DNA evidence? --[[User:Das654|Das654]] 17:11, 23 February 2007 (UTC)
:Your guess is as good as ours. —[[User:BazookaJoe|BazookaJoe]] 17:33, 23 February 2007 (UTC)

== Umm, this sounds like they all have to do with each other. ==

<blockquote>
1. Strong Bad takes DNA evidence and tampers with it ("...and that's when I tampered with the DNA evidence!")
2. Movie character notices it's gone. ("...and that's when I noticed the DNA evidence was gone!")
3. Strong Bad puts it back and Marzipan suspects that it's been tampered with ("...and that's when I thought the DNA evidence had been tampered with!")
</blockquote>

Now, before anyone tells me to go onto the forum, does anyone think this qualifies for a sub-plot page? --{{User:Super Martyo Brother/sig}} 18:58, 23 February 2007 (UTC)

:No, there's not enough going on for an actual plot, yet.{{User:Loafing/sig}} 07:29, 28 February 2007 (UTC)

::If there ever is enough, we can assume that in [[your funeral]] Homestar was trying to find the original evidence. [[User:Bad Bad Guy|Bad Bad Guy]] 21:59, 15 March 2007 (UTC)

:::Sounds like a plot to me. We do have 4 appearences, all seeming to have some sort of plot, in my opinion. I think if the next email has DNA evidence in it, maybe we should add a new section to the page about the sub-plot (although not neccessarily a new page altogether). {{User:Compgrl323/sig}} 22:11, 15 March 2007 (UTC)

::::There may be a plot behind these occurrences, but it would only be guesswork for us right now. I'm sure we'll find out soon enough if there is an actual plot behind it or not. Patience!{{User:Loafing/sig}} 22:14, 15 March 2007 (UTC)
:::::I hope this isn't too forum-esque, but if there is an ending to this plot, I think a character will find the evidence and hold it above his head. "I found it! The DNA evidence!" --{{User:Theyellowdart/sig}} 22:26, 15 March 2007 (UTC)
Imagine if they do it all year and it turns out the evidence was a vital piece of figuring out what happened to Decemberween 2005! [[User:Bad Bad Guy|Bad Bad Guy]] 02:53, 17 March 2007 (UTC)
:Decemberween 2005 was moved to [[Decemberween in July|July]], right? Anyway, I'm hoping that [http://objection.mrdictionary.net/go.php?n=1807550 this] will happen in some form... --[[User:ComputerBox|ComputerBox]] 13:39, 17 March 2007 (UTC)
::[http://objection.mrdictionary.net/go.php?n=1807553 Objection to myself!] --[[User:ComputerBox|ComputerBox]] 13:42, 17 March 2007 (UTC)
:::Decemberween in July was supposed to make up for the fact that there was no Dween special in 200'''3'''. Unless we count snowglobe or what i want, they still haven't done anything to make up for 2005 (probably the May-Jun hiatus again). [[User:Bad Bad Guy|Bad Bad Guy]] 00:03, 19 March 2007 (UTC)

I think it would be sheer brilliance if they were to continue this until email 173, culminating in [[The Paper]]'s replacement somehow. {{User:Thunderbird L17/Siggie}} 04:04, 17 March 2007 (UTC)

It could also build up to the departure of the Lappy. The Tandy lasted 1 year, the Compy 2, and this is the Lappy's 3rd year. [[User:Bad Bad Guy|Bad Bad Guy]] 17:29, 20 March 2007 (UTC)

If there is a subplot, it will be hard to work that guy from the movie into it, unless he was real like in this one theory I read at the forum. [[User:Bad Bad Guy|Bad Bad Guy]] 03:26, 11 April 2007 (UTC)

==Film Noir==

I think it's also noteworthy that Homestar hangs up a trenchcoat and fedora when Marzipan asks if he's found the DNA evidence yet... -Cyndentia

:Although trenchcoats and fedoras are a common theme among film noir, it's probably not related and could be any number of things. Knowing TBC, one would expect them to grossly exaggerate such a reference, such as reducing the entire scene to white on black and then having Homestar actually notice the change. — {{User:Lapper/sig}} 21:23, 15 March 2007 (UTC)

== All but one? ==

Bad Bad Guy brought up the fact that the only email of aught seven to not include a joke about the DNA evidence is [[looking old]]. I'm kinda iffy on this one, and would like to hear peoples opinions. In conclusion, should we add it or not? {{User:Bluebry/sig}} 21:31, 16 March 2007 (UTC)
: Given that [[Coach Z|awrt-severn]] only has five emails so far, I say leave it off for now. --{{User:Jay/sig}} 21:32, 16 March 2007 (UTC)

== Who Died? ==

Is it possible to determined who died?I know its not: Strong Bad, The Poopsmith, The Cheat, Coach Z, Homsar, Marzipan, Homestar Runner, Strong Mad, The Robot, Strong Sad(strong badathlon),Bubs, The King of Town, Pom Pom(unnatural),Senor Cardgage,The Knight, The Hornblower, The Blacksmith,(the movies), Old Lady, and Taranchula,(your funeral). There are alot of people left,so who could have died?

current status

2006-07-12T23:50:02Z

Spongemaster0: /* Transcript */

{{sbenav|56|cheat talk|japanese cartoon}}

[[Image:sbemail56.PNG|thumb|"This crap ain't funny!"]]

In a rushed email, Strong Bad is asked what his current status is with the ladies.

'''Cast (in order of appearance):''' {{Film|Strong Bad}}, [[Zubs and Coach B]]

'''Places:''' [[Computer Room]]

'''Computer:''' [[Compy 386]]

'''Date:''' December 30, 2002

'''Running Time:''' 1:13

'''Page Title:''' Compy 386!

__FORCETOC__
== Transcript ==

''{Start of the e-mail, we're staring at the monitor. Strong Bad is absent. Then we hear footsteps getting faster as they approach, and Strong Bad runs on-screen. He notices the computer and screeches to a halt.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Oh! The email!

''{he sits at the computer}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Uh, look guys. I don't have a lotta time. I'm kind of in the middle of something and I really can't explain. I'll try and do an e-mail ''{he types strongbad_email.exe}'' real quick-a-like.

''{reading fast}''

<blockquote class="compy email">Hey man,<br />
I was just wondering what your<br />
current status with the ladies is?<br />
<br />
Jordan Reynolds<br />
New Hampshire</blockquote>

'''STRONG BAD:''' Uhh, let's see... ''{typing}'' Strong Bad with the ladies — Current Status: They all still want me. ''{stops typing}'' Y'know, what can I say? I'm a chick magnet. A babe conductor. A... logarithm... for the ladies.

'''COACH Z''': ''{offscreen}'' Hey Strong Bad!

'''BUBS''': ''{offscreen}'' Hey Strong Bad!

'''STRONG BAD''': Oop, gotta go!

''{He runs off. Coach Z and Bubs walk in. Their heads have been swapped, and they are now Coach B and Zubs.}''

'''COACH Z''': Well... he's not here.

'''BUBS''': Well, you better find him quick! This crap ain't funny!

'''COACH Z''': I'd be hard-pressed to do ''anything'' quick in ''this'' train-wreck! What've ya been eatin', concrete?

''{Coach Z walks off.}''

'''BUBS''': Least I don't have no clown feet! I can hardly walk in these things! ''{Cut to his feet. He then walks off}'' Ronald McDonald, grumble-mumble....

''{[[The Paper]] comes down.}''

== Easter Eggs ==

*At the end, click on the disk on the table. The Compy will create a message that says:

<blockquote class="email" style="background-image:none">The Coach B/Zubs Project<br />
Current Status: Pretty Hilarious
</blockquote>

== Fun Facts ==
=== Trivia ===
*This is the only email in which the Compy makes a humming noise when it is switched on.
*The label on the disk in the floppy disk container reads "[[Floppy Disk Container#loom|loom disk 1 of 24]]".
*A [[Wikipedia:logarithm|logarithm]] is a mathematical term that is the inverse of raising a number to a power.

=== Real-World References ===
*[[Wikipedia:Ronald McDonald|Ronald McDonald]] is the clown mascot for [[Wikipedia:McDonald's|McDonald's]].

== External Links ==
*[[HR:sbemail56.html|watch "current status"]]
*[[HR:sbemail56.swf|view the Flash file for "current status"]]

{{Strong Bad Email}}
[[Category:Compy 386 Emails]] [[Category:Bubs Filmography]] [[Category:Coach Z Filmography]]

no loafing

2006-07-10T20:08:49Z

Spongemaster0: /* Fast-Forward */

{{sbenav|86|2 years|mile}}

[[Image:sbemail86.png|thumb|"Get back to work!"]]

{{aboutemail}} {{for|sign|No Loafing Sign}}

Ryan asks Strong Bad about the "No Loafing" sign in Strong Bad's house, and where it went. He puts up inspirational [[Hanging_Objects#Computer Room|posters]] to get everybody working.

'''Cast (in order of appearance):''' {{Film|Strong Bad}}, {{Film|Strong Mad}}, {{Film|The Cheat}}, {{Film|Strong Sad}} (Easter egg)

'''Places:''' [[Computer Room]], [[Strong Sad's Room]] (Easter egg)

'''Computer:''' [[Compy 386]]

'''Date:''' October 6, 2003

'''Running Time:''' 1:53

'''Page Title:''' Compy 386!!

== Transcript ==

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{singing}'' Driving down the strip in my cool cool car, checkin' all the emails out!

''{reading}''

<blockquote class="compy email">Hey Strong Bad!<br />
<br />
Whatever happened to that "No Loafing"<br />
sign you used to have?<br />
<br />
Ryan, CO</blockquote>

''{Strong Bad reads "CO" as "Co... colo-colorado."}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Hey, great question, stupid! Here's an answer. ''{typing}'' The year was 1987, not a very good year for productivity. And as a result, productivity was down something-eight percent.

''{A pie-chart, circa 1987, falls down displaying the productivity rating}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' I realized things were gonna spiral out of control unless I gave them a little jumpstart. A sign that said "No Loafing"—

''{A picture of Strong Bad standing by the sign appears}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' —was the answer. ''{clears screen, continues typing}'' But that was a long time ago. I suppose ol' Loafy might be losing his edge. Maybe I should put up some of those inspirational posters and stuff to get things back in gear. You know, the kinds that have ''{stops typing}'' like ''{resumes typing}'' whales or sunsets or windsurfers on em. And they say stuff about determination and giving a care.

''{Cut to a mostly blank room. Strong Bad walks in on Strong Mad and the Cheat sleeping under the "No Loafing" sign next to a [[The Smashed Muffler|beat-up muffler]] and a length of pipe. He has a bunch of posters under one arm.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' You guys are pathetic.

'''STRONG MAD:''' Dah?

'''STRONG BAD:''' Have you forgotten what got us here?

'''THE CHEAT:'''' ''{questioning The Cheat noise}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' No Loafing got us here!

'''THE CHEAT:''' ''{indifferent The Cheat noise}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Take a look at these bad boys and get back to work!

'''STRONG MAD:''' Dah!

''{Strong Bad begins posting the posters. The first one is a picture of a whale's tail sticking out of the clouds and it is captioned "Remember the 'tivities: Creativity; Productivity; Activity; Get Back To Work."}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' This one's got like some kinda whale...in space...

''{He puts one up that has a picture of a windsurfer and the caption "Failure is not a four-letter word."}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' And this one talks about cussing...

'''STRONG BAD:''' And this one's incredibly inspirational...

''{He puts one up with a picture of a guy jumping out of the water and it's captioned "I HAVE FRIENDS! Keep working, little man"}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ...with the bursting waters...

''{He puts up a framed picture of a dog captioned "The Cheat, watch your freakin' back, Squeaky."}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Here's one a-those hush puppies. They'll make you work for it.

''{A slice of a tree trunk is put on the wall, with a picture of a horse on it and it is captioned "The loneliest goat sees the last sunset last..."}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' And this wood-burny thing's got some kinda old adage on it. About goats.

''{Strong Mad instantly leaps up with a yell. The Cheat tosses him the pipe, which he uses to smash the muffler.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Excellent! That-a way, boys! Chins up! Tifle down! And so on...

''{Strong Bad walks back to his computer}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{typing}'' Well, whoever, I see I've gotten things back on track. Sounds like I deserve a three-hour lunch. I'ma head over to Bubs' for one of his 30-cent lunch specials.

''{Strong Bad puts a sticky note on the screen reading "out to lunch, then appointment, then something else" and leaves. [[The Paper]] comes down.}''

== Easter Eggs ==
*At the very end you can click on "lunch specials" to see [[Bubs]]' lunch specials:
** 2 buffalo wing bones (hot)
** A cup of ice
** A half-eaten candy bar
*Also at the end you can click on the word "appointment" on the Post-It to see exactly what that appointment was.

''{Cut to Strong Sad's room. Strong Sad is in bed.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{jumping up and down on Strong Sad}'' I hate you! I hate you! I hate you! I hate you!

'''STRONG SAD:''' ''{simultaneously}'' Ooh! Ooh! Ow! Ooh! Oh!

== Fun Facts ==

===Trivia===
*When the picture of Strong Bad pointing to the No Loafing sign in 1987 flashes up, the screen of [[Tandy 400]] reads:
<blockquote class="tandy email" style="background-image:none">Dear Strong Bad,<br />
I like your wallpaper.<br />
<br />
-Mendelev</blockquote>
:The wallpaper shown is done in the style of a typical '80s home, complete with pears and two other angiosperms.
*In an earlier version of this e-mail, this spot contained the same screen seen in [[little animal]] right up until Strong Bad calls the Cheat over.
*The chart reads: Productivity 5%, Loafing 95%. Hence the sign.

===Remarks===
*Strong Bad mentions the year [[1987]] for the second time in a row. He also brings it up in the previous email, [[2 years]].
*Strong Bad's arms are too short to reach the tops of the posters as he puts them up.

===Goofs===
*When the picture of Strong Bad in front of the Tandy comes up, the green lines on the Tandy are moving, even though it's supposed to be a photo.
*When Strong Mad takes hold of the pipe and his hand is up, he has five fingers. When his hand is down, he only has four.

===Real-World References===
*The falling whale is possibly a reference to ''[[Wikipedia:The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy|The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy]]'', a series of books by [[Wikipedia:Douglas Adams|Douglas Adams]]. (A whale falling from space was a short, but funny, chapter in the first book in the series.) However, whales are a common theme in "new age"-y posters and such, so it's likely just a coincidence.
*The poster on Strong Sad's wall in the "appointment" Easter egg is of the emo band [[Wikipedia:The Promise Ring|The Promise Ring]].

===Fast-Forward===
*[[Mendelev]], the wallpaper-admirer, turns out to become a character in Peasant's Quest, much like [[Jhonka]] and [[Kerrek]].
*The [[Hanging Objects|poster]] of the whale's tail that says "Failure is not a four letter word" is used later in the [[Biz Cas Fri]] toons on Strong Bad's wall.
*The No Loafing sign would get redesigned in [http://www.hrwiki.org/index.php/redesign Redesign]

== DVD Version ==
*The DVD version features hidden creators' commentary. To access it, switch your DVD player's audio language selection while watching.
*The "I hate you, I hate you" Easter egg was extended, making it more practical for DVD players that take a while to load the clip.
===Commentary Transcript===
('''Commentary by:''' [[Matt Chapman]], [[Mike Chapman]])

'''MATT:''' So, no loafing, the no loafing sign... I'm trying to figure out where...where it first came from when we first used it.

'''MIKE:''' Yeah, well, where it comes from is an old batman episode. The uh, Joker, his lair, in the background, on the wall there's this sign that says "no loafing."

'''MATT:''' ''{laughing}'' Is that it? When The Joker goes to school?

'''MIKE:''' It's behind the candy store; their secret hideout's behind the candy store

'''MATT:''' The "Easy Living" Candy Store.

'''MIKE:''' That's right.

'''MATT:''' Um, so anyway, the no loafing sign is uh, another reference to Batman

'''MIKE:''' Oh, that right there, that chart, I used to have this job where I made graphics just like that all the time, so that's why it was so well shaded. Oh, and I want to make that wallpaper.

'''MATT:''' And, that, uh, you'll notice, in that still photograph, the lines are moving on the computer.

'''MIKE:''' What lines?

'''MATT:''' The lines on the old computer. The green lines!

'''MIKE:''' Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! I missed... Oh!

'''MATT:''' Yeah. It's one of those "Harry Potter" photographs.

''{Mike laughs}''

'''MATT:''' A Muggle photograph. Er, non...non-Muggle.

'''MIKE:''' Now this was fun to make, to make these posters and stuff.

'''MATT:''' Them, that's a reference to the basis movie I made in college where these no good-nicks are beating on a muffler with a lead pipe. Mike made that one.

'''MIKE:''' That was fun to do. Whales...

'''MATT:''' That one's great.

'''MIKE:''' And look...

'''MIKE AND MATT:''' There's our friend Matt!

'''MIKE:''' At the beach!

'''MATT:''' He's on later, he has a voice appearance

'''MIKE:''' Appearance, yeah. Which e-mail is that in?

'''MATT:''' ''{Imitating the other Matt}'' Mom!!

'''MIKE:''' He says that

'''MATT:''' Yeah. Shins up... They've really given up the works there.

'''MIKE:''' Batbede... That's another song that gets into our heads ''all'' the time.

'''MIKE AT MATT:''' ''{singing}'' BatbedededeBatbededede ''{laughing}''

'''MIKE:''' I like Bubs', uh... Hey, do we get– ''{cut off}''

===Fun Facts===

*Matt calls the moving photograph a "Harry Potter" photo. This is referring to the moving pictures in the ''[[Wikipedia:Harry Potter|Harry Potter]]'' series of books and movies. He first calls it a "Muggle" photograph and then corrects himself and calls it a "non-Muggle" (i.e. magical) photograph. [[Wikipedia:Magic_%28Harry_Potter%29#Muggle|"Muggle"]] is a word referring to non-magical people in the Harry Potter universe.
*When Matt refers to TBC's friend Matt's voice appearance, he is referring to the TV voice in [[sibbie]]. He is mistaken in saying that the appearance is "on later" because "sibbie" actually comes ''before'' "no loafing".

== External Links ==
*[[HR:sbemail86.html|watch "no loafing"]]
*[[HR:sbemail86.swf|view the Flash file for "no loafing"]]

{{Strong Bad Email}}
[[Category:Compy 386 Emails]][[Category: Emails With DVD Commentary]]

redesign

2006-07-10T19:18:49Z

Spongemaster0: /* Trivia */

{{sbenav|153|isp|redesign}}
[[Image:New iMac.png|thumb|"You clearly don't have what it takes to bring NO LOAFING into the digital age."]]

Strong Bad considers redesigning the [[No Loafing Sign|No Loafing sign]] and painting his room.

'''Cast (in order of appearance):''' {{Film|Strong Bad}}, {{Film|The Cheat}}, {{Film|Coach Z}}

'''Places:''' [[Computer Room]], [[The Cheat's Computer Room]], [[Strong Bad's Laundry Room]]

{{Comp|Lappy 486}}

'''Date:''' July 10, 2006

'''Running Time:''' 3:47

'''Page Title:''' Lappy 486

==Transcript==
''{The scene opens in a darkened Computer Room with yellow tape (reading "LELLOWTAPE") all over the Lappy.''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{from offcscreen}'' Email is nice, ''{the lights come on and Strong Bad sits down}'' dadadadadadada! ''{rips the tape away}'' Email is twice, habilascoobilasong! ''{pulls up the email}''

<blockquote class="lappy email">
<div>subject: keeping life exciting</div>
dear strong bad, <br />
dude i am getting bored of the "no loafing" sign and blue <br />
paint. <br/>
<br/>
jamie ericson canada
</blockquote>

''{The "dear strong bad" echoes, causing Strong Bad to look around a bit. Strong Bad pronounces "jamie ericson" as "hamiay eric-SON".}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{typing}'' That's so funny that you should say that Jamie, ''{says as an unintelligible mumble}'' because I was just thinking how bored I am with your butt, and your face, and your snotty nose.

''{"nose" echoes, and Strong Bad looks around some more. Strong Bad clears the screen.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{typing}'' I guess the No Loafing sign could take a cue from the fast-food, soft drink, and bad sports team industries and combat sluggish sales and decades of losing with a slick logo redesign.

''{The screen cuts back and then pans over to the No Loafing sign. The blue wall vanishes.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{rapping to a beat}'' First you squish it, skew it, and turn it all around. Squish it, skew it, and turn it all around.

''{As he says this, the border disappears and the words are squished, skewed, and turned around. At the end, the words are at a slant.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Then we need to make it all fast and slick and shiny like Flo Jo in a tuxedo.

''{The words curve, the tops of the letters become spikes pointint to the left, and they become all shiny.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{rapping again}'' Uh! Flo Jo with a tuxedo!

''{The words react to the beat of his rap, various decorations litter the screen, and a circle with a slash through it appears behind the words.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Now it's time to play Color Wheel Roulette. No Whammies, no Whammies.

''{The colors of the sign cycle through various schemes, finally ending up on the words being a dull yellow and the circle in the background turning a greenish tan, with the blank space in the middle turning brown.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Awww... Ouch, man. Now, just when you think you're done, you gotta dip it in molten Plexiglas...

''{The entire sign becomes glossy}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ...to give it that "children under 3 are sure to choke on it" goodness.

''{With a "ding", sparkles appear on the logo.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Oh, wait. Almost forgot the fangs.

''{With a roar, bloody fangs sprout from the logo.}''

''{Cut to The Cheat and Strong Bad, with a new-style iMac in front of The Cheat. The logo Strong Bad described is on the monitor.}''

'''THE CHEAT:''' ''{The Cheat noises}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Well, I don't know how we're going to print it out, seeing as how somebody sliced off the back of your monitor. And quit rubbing that plastic bar of soap ''{indicating The Cheat's mouse}'' on the desk. You clearly don't have what it takes to bring NO LOAFING into the digital age.

''{The Cheat closes the window, and Strong Bad turns toward the camera.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' But I does!

''{Cut back to the No Loafing sign}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Fresh from elementary school cafetoriums and lotto machines...

''{The No Loafing sign transforms into a cafeteria-style LED display.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' comes one of those actually pretty hard to read message board signs.

''{"NO LOAFING" scrolls past, followed by a crawling worm.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Capable of advanced animation, scrollabatonies...

''{The words "GRUEL IS COOL!" come in, with the individual pixels coming from opposite sides before meeting.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ...and twelve levels of blinkiness.

''{"NO LOAFING" returns and the letters blink. Then the screen blinks and fireworks appear on the display.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Now we can celebrate the lack of loafing with some fireworks! And a man doing cartwheels!

''{The fireworks disappear and a man doing cartwheels moves across the display. Cut to Strong Bad.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' No mortal would ''dare'' loaf under the four-colored dotted digital stare of this bad boy! Y'know, unless they looked up too late, and the "No" had already scrolled off...

''{Scrolls up to the display just as the "N" in "NO LOAFING" scrolls off.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ...so they thought that it said, "Do Loafing."

''{The words "DO LOAFING" scroll on.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Or maybe, like, Franklin Delano Loafing, our nation's laziest president.

''{The man doing cartwheels appears after "DO LOAFING", followed by "FRANKL" before the screen cuts back to Strong Bad's Lappy.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{typing}'' That's enough loaf. As for the blue wall, if you're going to repaint anything, you might as well use that magic green screen paint that Hollywood still thinks looks good. Then the wall can be anything you want!

''{Cut to Strong Bad's computer room, but with bright green walls instead of blue. Strong Bad happily skips in the middle of the screen.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' Imagine being able to frolic through the bread aisle...

''{The wall - and Strong Bad's bright green eyes - are replaced with an image of a bread aisle at a supermarket.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{still a voiceover}'' ...without leaving the house!

''{Strong Bad turns toward the screen and leans against the wall.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Oh, bread aisle! Warm me with your enriched, bleached bosom! And please, give me back my sight!

''{Cut to another part of the computer room with the same green paint. Strong Bad is sitting on the floor, looking at the wall, and holding a controller.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' Or play your favorite video games where the pixels are big as hams!

''{The wall becomes a video game called "Sundae Drivin'", which appears to involve a giant bowl of ice cream on wheels driving down the road collecting toppings.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{imitating a car's engine}'' Vrrrrrrrr! Vrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!

''{The sundae-car collects a cherry, and "CHERRY GET" appears on the top of the screen.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Vrrrrrrrrrr! Watch out for the wet walnuts!

''{The sundae-car collides with a brown jar with a "W" on it and it explodes.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Awwwwwww!

''{The screen reads "Your James Over".}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' This game sucks.

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' But what green screens are ''really'' for...

''{The screen cuts to Strong Bad, with a Roman-style spear, shield, and helmet, looking at the wall, which appears to be an island village with a "Claymation" cycloptic monster on it.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{still a voiceover}'' ...is battling Claymation!

''{The monster steps forward and swipes in Strong Bad's direction.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' It'll take more than karate pants to keep me from toilet-papering the temple of the gods!

''{Coach Z walks in. Where his bright green body overlaps the wall, the green screen's image appears over him. His usual "Z" medallion is replaced with a glossy curved medallion with fangs, resembling The Cheat's remake of the No Loafing sign.}''

'''COACH Z:''' Hey, Strong Bad! Check it out! I squished it! And skewed it! And turned it all...

''{The medallion is squished, skewed, and turned around. Both Strong Bad and the monster run off.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Aaaaaaaaaaaah!

'''COACH Z:''' ...a... round?

''{Cut back to the Lappy}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Aww, forget it, Jamie. ''{said as "whay-whay"}'' If you're so bored with my style, here's a change for ya.

''{Cut to the laundry room}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{from offscren}'' No, pan up!

''{The screen pans up to reveal a seashell-themed wallpaper near the ceiling.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' I've put up this delightful ocean-themed border in the laundry room! Oh, and look!

''{The screen zooms in on the dials on the washing machine.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' I've hot-glued some actual shells onto the knobs of the washer and dryer!

''{Cut back to show Strong Bad standing next to the washer.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' All for under fifty bucks!

''{Cut to a close-up.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Well, that's our show. Join us next week when we show you how to knit your own splatter paints!

''{Cut back again}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' All for under fifty bucks!

''{A logo for "redesigning SBEMAILS, JERK FOOT" appears.}''

'''SINGERS:''' Ba-doo ba! Daaaah!

''{On "Daaaah!", the words "FOR UNDER 50 BUCKS" appear below. [[The Paper]] comes down.}''

==Easter Eggs==
[[Image:Colorwheelroulette.PNG|thumb|Stupid Home Edition!]]
*Click on the "No Loafing" sign when Strong Bad is playing color wheel roulette with it to see the box design for Color Wheel Roulette Stupid Home Edition by [[Boardelectrix]].
<blockquote>
-50% fewer deaths than Russian variety<br>
-Pant one, pant two!!<br>
-Twice as many deaths as Garden Variety<br>
</blockquote>
*When "Do Loafing" starts to scroll by on the sign, click it to see a bumper sticker for Sucky Mountain, Colorado.
*At the end, click on "Jerk" which gives a "conversation" between The Cheat's redesigned No Loafing sign and the redesigned Coach Z emblem.
:'''REDESIGNED NO LOAFING SIGN:''' ''{purrs, growls and then roars}''
:'''REDESIGNED COACH Z EMBLEM:''' ''{runs away}'' Yorp, yorp, yorp, yorp, yorp!

==Fun Facts==

===Explanations===
[[Image:No Loafing Marquee.png|thumb|The "New" No Loafing sign.]]
*[[wikipedia:Bluescreen|Greenscreens]] are used in filming in order to have an alternate background behind the live action. If an actor or piece of scenery is green, it will be replaced by the background. This technique is called Chroma-Key, and can actually be done with any color, though blue and green are the most popular.
**The green glow along the bottom edge of Strong Bad's wall is a reference to early 80s TV, when chroma-keying technology was not as good as it is now, and a green or blue "tearing" would often be seen on the edges of the green region, especially in the hair of on-screen talent during sports events or weather reports.
**The "cutouts" in Strong Bad's eyes and Coach Z's partial disappearance are examples of common problems with most chroma key systems, in which clothing and other elements that are close to the color of the background are interpreted as part of the chroma key.
*The No Loafing Scrolling Sign is actually a [[Wikipedia:LED#LED_display_panels|scrolling LED marquee]] ''(Pictured)''.

===Trivia===
* This marks the first appearance of The Cheat's new computer, replacing the "[[Tangerine Dreams]]" iMac he had previously.

* This was the first email to come out in 56 days, which would probably explain the "LELLOWTAPE".

===Inside References===
* "Scrollabatonies" was previously used in one of the [[Scroll Button Songs]].
*The box design for "color wheel roulette Stupid Home Edition" is a reference to [[The Show#The Show! Stupid Home Edition|The Show! Stupid Home Edition]] from [[geddup noise]].
*"Your James Over" is a reference to the [[Homsar Main Page]].

===Real World References===
*"Franklin Delano Loafing" is a reference to [[Wikipedia:Franklin D. Roosevelt|Franklin Delano Roosevelt]], the 32nd President of the United States. It's also another instance of [[Presidents]].
*"Flo-Jo" was a nickname for [[Wikipedia:Florence Griffith Joyner|Florence Griffith Joyner]], an American athlete.
*"No [[Wikipedia:Whammy (Press Your Luck)|Whammies]]" was commonly chanted by players on the game show [[Wikipedia:Press Your Luck|Press Your Luck]].
*"Redesigning SBemails" at the end is a reference to the many house redesign shows on channels such as [[Wikipedia:HGTV|HGTV]].
*The "Cherry Get!" graphic that appears when Strong Bad is playing "Sundae Drivin'" is a reference to many Japanese video games, in which "[Object] Get!" is commonly displayed whenever you collect an object. 

==External Links==
{{sbemailextlinks|153|9061}}
{{Strong Bad Email}}

modeling

2006-06-16T21:34:42Z

Spongemaster0: /* Trivia */

{{sbenav|132|boring (really)|bottom 10}}
[[Image:sbemail132.PNG|thumb|He'll "pencil you in!"]]

Strong Bad is encouraged to become a model.

'''Cast (in order of appearance):''' {{Film|Strong Bad}}, {{Film|The King of Town}}, {{Film|Pom Pom}}, {{Film|Strong Sad}}, {{Film|Homestar Runner}}

'''Places:''' [[Computer Room]], [[King of Town's Castle]], [[The Field]]

{{Comp|Lappy 486}}

'''Date:''' June 27, 2005

'''Running time:''' 3:09

'''Page Title:''' Lappy 486

==Transcript==

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{singing}'' Can you handle my style? No, you can't handle my styyyyyle. Email! ''{pulls up the email, begins reading}''

<blockquote class="lappy email">
<div>subject: modeling</div>
dear STRONG BAD!!!!!!<br>
i think you're a pretty good looking guy. Have you ever<br>
considered doing some modeling?<br>
Yours truuly,<br>
Meghan, Albuquerque
</blockquote>

''{Strong Bad yells his name at the top of his lungs, and says "truuly" as "troo-OO-ly", "Meghan" as "Meg-han", and "Albuquerque" as "Al-bu-quay-quay"}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{typing}'' dear MEGHAN!!!!!! ''{yelled and pronounced as before}'' Of course I've considered modeling. Someone as pretty good looking as me gets approached on the street all the-wait. Modeling?! Hmmmm. That's a truuly ''{pronounced as before}'' great idea! ''{clears screen}'' Why did I never think of that before? Maybe I should go get me some new threads at Styles Upon Styles and get some headshots taken. Pom Pom has a camera. Maybe I'll get him to take some pictures of me. Or better yet, maybe I'll go karate chop the King of Town and THEN get Pom Pom to take some pictures of me.

''{Music starts as Strong Bad approaches the King of Town, in front of his castle. Strong Bad karate chops the King.}''

'''THE KING OF TOWN:''' Ow!

''{Cut to Strong Bad in a makeshift modeling studio in the Field. He is sitting on a box, and wearing a blue shirt with a yellow shirt tied around his neck, like a cape. The backdrop is a white sheet with paint in various colors randomly splattered on it, taped to two wooden posts. Photography lights are seen on the left and right, and a silhouette of Pom Pom is seen in the foreground with a camera. The screen flashes as Pom Pom takes the picture, and as it fades back in, we see a closeup of Strong Bad in the same outfit, now holding a tennis racket.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Ha haa!

''{The screen flashes, and now Strong Bad is lying on the ground.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Who, me?

''{Another flash, and now he's standing on the box, with his right hand held out in front of him, as though he's pointing at the camera}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' I'm charming! ''{points with his left hand}''

''{Another flash, and he's now standing with the tennis racket.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{off-handed tone}'' I'm charming.

''{Yet another flash, and the camera is panned back so that Pom Pom is visible again. Strong Bad is standing.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Oh, what's the time? ''{looks at his right wrist as though looking at a watch}''

''{Another flash, and we see another close up, as Strong Bad starts out turned away from the camera, and he turns toward it, waves, and holds his chin, with afterimages following him. Another flash, and now Strong Bad is wearing a black suit with a purple shirt and glasses, holding a briefcase.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' I'm casually late!

''{Another flash, but the screen doesn't change. Strong Bad walks toward stage right, and pauses posing. The camera flashes again, and Strong Bad is now seen in front of what seems to be a paneled wood wall, holding a telephone with only a frayed wire coming out of it.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Let's-a do lunch. Ha-haaa! ''{puts down the phone and picks up the tennis racket again}''

''{Another flash, and Strong Bad is lying on his stomach on the ground, holding a pencil and leaning toward the camera. We can see that the wall in the last image was actually just another screen, leaning on the posts.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' I'll pencil you in. ''{pretends to write something on the ground}''

''{One more flash, and now Strong Bad is in a frozen walking pose in front of a blue screen.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Oh, look at the time! ''{kneels and looks at his "watch" again}''

''{Another flash, and now Strong Bad is wearing a white turtleneck and a sailor's cap, while holding a corn-cob pipe and a golf club. A map is seen in the background, in front of the false wood wall.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' I say, lads, is that Cape Cod? ''{uses the golf club to point at the map, and shrugs}''

''{Another flash, and the camera cuts back again. This time, Strong Bad is sitting on the box.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Oh, look, off the portboard stow.

''{Another flash, and he's standing with his hands on his hips.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' We're on a collision course with sultriness! ''{shakes hips}''

''{One final flash and we cut back to the Lappy.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{typing}'' I can't wait to get those pictures back from the lab. I can totally see some of them being used in one of those glossy fashion magazines. Y'know, the kind that cost nine bucks and are 97% ads. Like maybe in an ad for those fancy leather shoes that you're supposed to wear without...

''{An ad for "Homely Boy Brand HUGE Tube Socks" featuring Strong Bad is displayed.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ...socks. WITHOUT SOCKS!

''{The image vanishes.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Man! Can you imagine the luxury! Ooh! Or some kinda fancy men's cologn...ac.

''{An ad for "Doctor Stankfoot's Watery Athlete's Foot Cream" featuring Strong Bad appears.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' And I can be laying next to some skinny blonde girl looking totally disinterested. You know like, "Whatever, baby.

''{The ad disappears.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' You can't even approach the flava... of my colognac." ''{clears screen}'' No wait! The cover of some steamy romance novel! And my ripped...

''{A book titled "Unattractive Detective Stories!! The Case of the Dame with the Hard-to-Look-at-Teeth" appears.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ...self would be on top of some cliff or lighthouse clutching a milkmaid in a flowy dress.

''{It vanishes.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' And she'd be like, "No, Parson Jim, it can never be!" But I'm all like, "Look in your heart, Chezmerelda."

''{The camera cuts back to show Strong Sad standing next to the desk, holding a pile of mail.}''

'''STRONG SAD:''' Hey, Strong Bad, I was just looking through today's mail, and guess who made the cover of ''Husky Headed Boys Back 2 School Catalog''.

'''STRONG BAD:''' WHAT?!? Back-to-school already?! It's not even July! So, who's on the cover?

'''STRONG SAD:''' Uh, ''you'' are.

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''What?!'' I ain't got no husky head!

'''STRONG SAD:''' Well, it's about the same size as my husky body... ''{hits his stomach twice, resulting in a dodgeball-like sound effect}'' Oh, and this check ''{holds out a check}'' from ''Husky Headed Boys Catalog'' came—

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{swiping the check}'' Whoa-ho! My husky head commands a pretty penny! This'll bring home a few months' worth of bacon! I bet your husky body's not worth a hundred and eight dollars.

'''STRONG SAD:''' No, but poachers have offered several ''thousand'' for my feet.

''{Homestar Runner walks up.}''

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' Hey guys! Guess who made this week's cover of ''Stupid Coincidence Magazine''!

''{He holds up the magazine, which features Homestar himself. He then throws it over his shoulder and starts dancing to the same music Strong Bad posed to earlier. The camera flashes, and we see the "Husky Headed Boys" and "Stupid Coincidence Magazine" issues up close. [[The Paper]] comes down.}''

==Easter Eggs==
*At the end, click on the diamond on Strong Bad's head to see an ad for "SB Finest Colognac."

==Fun Facts==
===Explanations===

*"Colognac" is a [[Portmanteaus|portmanteau]] word formed by combining "[[Wikipedia:Cognac (drink)|cognac]]", a distilled liquor, and "[[Wikipedia:Eau de Cologne|cologne]]", a fragrance.
*"Portboard Stow" is probably a distortion of "Starboard Bow," which is the front-right side of a ship, or "Port Bow," the front-left side of a ship.

===Trivia===
*The ads and magazines read, in order:
<pre>HOMELY BOY BRAND
HUGE TUBE SOCKS

"YOU MIGHT COULD SLEEP IN ONE!"</pre><br>
<pre>GOT STINKFOOT?
GET STANKFOOT!
DOCTOR
STANKFOOT'S
WATERY
ATHLETE'S
FOOT CREAM</pre><br>
<pre>Unattractive
Detective Stories!!
The Case of the Dame
with the
Hard-to-Look-at-Teeth</pre>
:*''[[Stupid Coincidence Magazine]]:''
<pre>Stupid $9
Coincidence
MAGAZINE

Why Some People
Our Think Saying
Least Likely Ka-Winky-Dink
Issue Yet!! Is Funny
pg. 143</pre>
:*''[[Husky Headed Boys Back 2 School Catalog]]:''
<pre>HUSKY Headed Boys
BACK 2 SCHOOL!!
Catalog

Giant Headed
SUMMER 2005 Kids Need
Clothes
Too!!</pre><br>
<pre>SB

FINEST COLOGNAC.

drink it. or wear it. we don't really give a care.</pre>

* The map that Strong Bad stands in front of while posing marks "Land," "Haggleston," "[[Place]]," and "Nautical Ocean."
*The label on the disk in the floppy disk container reads "[[Floppy Disk Container#the news room|the news room]]".
*This toon has [[Nondescript Nouns]] ("Place" and "Land").
*Strong Bad recieves $108 from Husky Headed Boys Magazine

===Remarks===
*We see Strong Bad's written signature in the HUGE Tube Socks ad, and it is different from his signature in the [[Yearbook Character Page]].
*Stupid Coincidence Magazine costs $9, the same price as one of those glossy fashion magazines that Strong Bad mentions.
*Homestar was considering breaking into male modeling in [[crying]].

===Goofs===
[[Image:Modelinggoof.PNG|thumb|"Dear MASKING GOOF!"]]
*When Strong Bad yells "dear STRONG BAD!!!!!" and, "dear MEGHAN!!!!!", the reflection of his head appears slightly above the Lappy due to a masking goof.
*When Homestar holds up the magazine, his image on the cover blinks (this does not happen at the end of the email).
*In the email screen when the "romance novel" comes up, you can no longer click the Lappy to see the "ripple" effect.
*Right after Strong Bad says "letsa do lunch," he holds up the tennis racket, and even though he is in a suit, the arm is bare.
*Strong Bad commits a common usage error, substituting "disinterested" for "uninterested." "Disinterested" means impartial or unbiased, as in a "disinterested" jury or judge. "Uninterested," by contrast, means showing no interest in something, as Strong Bad would be in the situation he describes.
**Strong Bad also makes another error: he types "Can you imagine the luxury!" instead of "Can you imagine the luxury?".

===Inside References===
*Pom Pom's camera was also in the email [[part-time job]].
*"Styles Upon Styles" is a retailer previously mentioned in [[animal]].
*Strong Bad dressed up as a ship's captain in [[pizzaz]], minus the turtleneck.
**The turtleneck was the one Strong Bad wore as [[Archibald]] in [[A Decemberween Pageant]].
*The screen with the wooden panels is the [[Balding Man]]'s room from [[Senorial Day]].
*"Skinny blonde girls" were first mentioned in [[theme party]].
*[[Place]] first appeared in [[different town]].
*When Strong Sad hits his "husky body" it makes the same sound as when he was pegged by kickballs in [[1 step ahead]].
*Strong Bad originally tried to sell Strong Sad's feet to poachers in [[50 emails]].
*Strong Bad uses a yellow [[Disconnected Telephones|disconnected telephone]] for one of his business shots.

===Real-World References===
*"Got stinkfoot" is a reference to the SNES game [[Wikipedia:Parodius| Parodius]], in which gaining a power-up will sometimes result in the main character saying "GOT A STINKFOOT?!" out of a megaphone.
**"Stinkfoot" is also the title of a song by [[Wikipedia:Frank Zappa|Frank Zappa]].
*Strong Bad's "oh, look at the time/what's the time" poses during the photo shoot are a reference to the episode "The Prettiest Week of My Life" from the television show [[Wikipedia:Get a Life (TV series)|Get A Life]]. In the episode, "Gee, I wonder what time it is" is one of the poses Chris is taught at "Handsome Boy Modeling School".
*[[Wikipedia:Cape Cod|Cape Cod]] is a peninsula forming the easternmost part of Massachusetts.

==External Links==
{{sbemailextlinks|132|4027}}
{{Strong Bad Email}}