Teen Girl Squad Issue 13

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Teen Girl Squad Issue #13
watch Issue 12 Issue 1
Don't let Timkins play my PSone!

So And So is baby-sitting, but her friends interrupt.

Cast (in order of appearance): Tompkins, Momkins, Baby Timkins, So and So, Baby-Sat guy, Cheerleader, What's Her Face, The Ugly One, Plumber, Peacey P, Olympic Man, Policemen

Places: Tompkins's house

Date: Monday, June 18th, 2007

Running Time: 3:25

Page Title: Bebe's Sitter's Kids!

Contents

Transcript

{The toon opens with Tompkins playing his Game Boy with a silhouette of his mother waving to him. The Teen Girl Squad theme music plays.}

TOMPKINS: Aww, peas Momkins. I don't need a babysitter.

{Zoom out to reveal Momkins, a robot wearing cowboy boots and a hat and carrying a pickaxe, along with a baby.}

TOMPKINS: I can watch baby Timkins while you go out prospecting for future ex-husbands.

MOMKINS: Whatevs little man. You can't even take care of your own virtual pet.

{Cut to a closeup of the Game Boy screen, displaying a bloated pet and the text, "Food: 600%"}

VIRTUAL PET: Please stop feeding me!

{Tompkins begins mashing the buttons on the Game Boy.}

TOMPKINS: Teh heh heh heh heh.

{Cut to Momkins standing next to the front door, which has a large, wrinkly face on it}

FRONT DOOR: Ding dong. Ding dong, yo.

{The door opens to reveal So and So, with fangs.}

SO AND SO: Hello Mrs. Tomkinsrobotmomerson. I know I'm 3 hours early, but I wanted to...

MOMKINS: Listen, I'll be at a place until a time. My cell phone number is some numbers. The baby needs stuff. What's poison control? Punch Tomkins in the gut. Good luck.

{Momkins rushes out the door with a crazed look on her face and her tongue hanging out of her mouth. Her hat flies off and So and So's hair is disheveled as she leaves.}

NARRATOR STRONG BAD: She gone!

{Cut to So and So speaking to Tompkins, who is playing his Game Boy next to a clock. The clock reads 5:03}

SO AND SO: {pointing to her watch} Alright Tomkins, it is WAY past your bedtime.

TOMPKINS: {pointing at a flustered So and So} Listen babysit, I don't need to be babysat. I'll be in my room reorganizing my trenchcoats.

{As Tompkins leaves, a giant baby resembling the Arrow'd Guy lands on and crushes him.}

NARRATOR STRONG BAD: BABY SAT!

TOMPKINS: Don't let Timkins play my PSone!!!!!

{Cut to a Teen Girl Squad title screen, featuring Cheerleader (wearing a dress labeled "Ms. Thang"), The Ugly One, and What's Her Face smashing through a wall. "issue 13" and "by: strong bad" appear in the corners.}

NARRATOR STRONG BAD: Teen Girl Squad!!! Cheerleader! {$15/hour} What's Her Face! {$4.75/hour} The Ugly One! {plain yogurt/hour}

{Cut to So and So speaking to the other girls next to the smashed wall}

SO AND SO: Not now, you guys. I'm babysitting.

CHEERLEADER: Oh, we know how to babysit... {grows hypnotic eyes and fangs, and pulls out a cell phone and several volumes of "Dem Boys"} I'll call EACH AND EVERY BOY!!

WHAT'S HER FACE: I'll eat all their food!

THE UGLY ONE: {wearing a crown and a ruffled collar and holding a remote} Just call me the queen of pay-per-view! {throws off the crown and collar and pushing the remote buttons} I think Ola Toya is fighting Camptown Jr. at Caesar's tonight!

SO AND SO: SHHH! Keep it down! The baby is studying for the SAT.

{Cut to baby Timkins, under a pile of four books labeled "babySAT"}

TIMKINS: Goo goo is ga-ga. Wah wah is ga-ga. Are all goo goos wah wahs?

{Cut to an annoyed Cheerleader, holding her cell phone. Her dress now reads "The future Ms. Thang".}

CHEERLEADER: Dag! None of my regulars are picking up! Let's see who on my B-list!

{The phone rings, and the screen splits to show a plumber answering the call on a plunger.}

PLUMBER: Uh, Buttcrack Plumbing!

CHEERLEADER: Hi Randy! I'm babysittin' tonight. Wanna come over and sneak in through the {printed: the through} back window?

PLUMBER: And this is for a how many gallon toilet, ma'am?

CHEERLEADER: Bring all your hot friends... they've got two pantries!!!

{A toilet with a beret, a mustache, and a loaf of french bread crushes Cheerleader with a plunger.}

NARRATOR STRONG BAD: EAU DE TOILETTE!

CHEERLEADER: So dignified!

{Cut to What's Her Face standing between the two pantries}

WHAT'S HER FACE: Wow! 2 pantries! I'll have me a diet soda I s'pose.

{So and So enters, livid with a giant mouth and fangs.}

SO AND SO: STOP! How many of those have you had?!?!

WHAT'S HER FACE: Uh, negative one sip.

{So and So holds up a textbook entitled, "urban legends i mean health class"}

SO AND SO: Don't you remember health class? You'll microwave the baby!!

WHAT'S HER FACE: {holding up a "Diet Brown" can} This is Diet Brown, not PCP.

{The Ugly One slides into the room.}

THE UGLY ONE: Did somebody say Peacey P? I LOVES the Peacey P!

{Cut to Olympic Man (with a blurred jersey) standing with a man with a jersey labeled, "Peacey P" (with a peace sign for "Peace")}

PEACEY P: Crample-o stow wha clamminuh whaow. My new album drop next sursdai. Ya'll biscuitheads.

{The Ugly One enters with a Peacy P necklace, and a pencil and notepad.}

THE UGLY ONE: Can a sista get an autograph?

{Olympic Man dangles The Ugly One off a balcony}

NARRATOR STRONG BAD: DANGLED OFF A HOTEL BALCONY'D!!

THE UGLY ONE: That's it?

{Zoom out as The Ugly One is dropped from the balcony into a "bayonet tailgate party"}

NARRATOR STRONG BAD: Uh, and then DROPPED FROM SAID HOTEL BALCONY'D!!

THE UGLY ONE: That's better!

{Cut to So and So holding a diaper and yelling at baby Timkins}

SO AND SO: What kinda dirty diaper is this?! I told you to alphabetize this stuff!

FRONT DOOR: BANG! BANG! BANG!

THE POLICE: {from behind the door} Open up! It's the police!

SO AND SO: AHH! THE POPO! I can't do another nickel!

{So and So jumps into the kitchen sink as background music begins to play.}

NARRATOR STRONG BAD: {singing} GARBAGE DISPOSAL,
WHAT A WAY TO GO!
GARBAGE DISPOSAL,
MEET SO AND SO!

{Cut to the Front Door, where What's Her Face has let two policemen into the house.}

WHAT'S HER FACE: Can I help you gentlemen?

POLICEMAN 1: Uh, yes, ma'am. We got a report of us wanting to watch the Ola Toya fight. You mind if we investigate?

POLICEMAN 2: I brought snack mix.

{Cut to a "confidential" envelope out of which three game cards are removed.}

NARRATOR STRONG BAD: The Snak Mix, in Tompkins' Parlor, WITH THE PRETZEL STICK!

{Cut to a life-sized Snak Mix bag with a monocle, who clubs What's Her Face with a pretzel stick}

WHAT'S HER FACE: OW! MY STYLE! (or lack thereof)

{Cut to Momkins, the two policemen, and baby Timkins sitting on a couch watching TV}

TV ANNOUNCER: ...anuddah vicious right!!!

POLICEMAN 1: I need to put an APB out on some microwave popcorn.

POLICEMAN 2: I'd like to report a very good-looking robot prospector.

MOMKINS: Awww, shush!

TIMKINS: {pointing at Policeman 1} You're not my real father!

{Cut to the usual "It's over!" screen}

NARRATOR STRONG BAD: It's over!

Easter Eggs

  • Click on the "O" at the end to see a promo for Peacey P's new album.

Fun Facts

Explanations

  • The SAT Reasoning Test is a test that is frequently taken prior to entry into college in America.
  • PCP, also known as angel dust, is a recreational drug.
  • Eau de Toilette is French for "Toilet Water".

Trivia

  • This episode is the first to use a cold open instead of starting immediately with the opening credits.
  • So and So is not included in the opening, as she has already been shown in the toon.

Remarks

  • When the toon was first released, the button on the main page said only "teen girl squad" instead of the usual "New teen girl squad!"
  • The '2 pantries' are actually one pantry with a reverse image next to it.

Goofs

  • Tompkins's name is misspelled as "Tomkins" through the entire toon, except in the Snack Mix sequence ("Tompkins' Parlor").

Inside References

  • What's Her Face comments about the loss of her style.
  • When Tompkins pushes the buttons on his Game Boy to feed his virtual pet, the text "m.a.s.h." appears.
  • So and So saying "I can't do another nickel!" is in reference to Teen Girl Squad Issue 11 when So and So was in jail for shoplifting.

Real-World References

  • Peacey P's voice and singing style is very similar to that of Snoop Dogg.
  • So and So's line "You'll microwave the baby!!" and the book of urban legends she is holding reference the urban legend of a stoned babysitter mistaking a baby for a roast.
  • The lines about the Snack Mix prior to What's Her Face's demise are based on the board game Clue.
  • The title of the short is a reference to comedian Robin Harris' "Bébé's Kids" stand-up comedy act. After his death, his routine was adapted into a movie, also called "Bébé's Kids", the first animated feature with a majority African-American cast.
  • "Ding dong. Ding dong, yo." may be a reference to the video for "Fat" by "Weird Al" Yankovic.
  • The Olympic Guy dangling The Ugly One from a hotel balcony is a reference to a widely-publicized event in 2002, when Michael Jackson dangled his son from a hotel balcony;
  • Dangling The Ugly One over the balcony is also a reference to Vanilla Ice's claim that rap record producer Marion "Suge" Knight hung him up upside down on a hotel balcony in order to get Vanilla Ice to turn over his royalties. This relates to the rapper Peacey P shown earlier in the episode.
  • The way the other three Teen Girl Squad members burst through the wall is similar to the Kool-Aid Man's entrances.

External Links

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